america's worst tragedies

Arlen Specter May Lose Next Week, Because Of Angry Hippies

Primary season is underway like hotcakes! Next week, the “very hyped” Democratic Senate primary race between Arlen Specter and Rep. Joe Sestak will reach its terrifying conclusion, and the old man appears to be on his way to a loss. It doesn’t help him now, either, that Sestak is going around yapping about how Specter voted against Elena Kagan’s confirmation as Solicitor General last year, when he was a Republican, even though no one on the left really likes Elena Kagan anyway. Then again, do any voters really care about Arlen Specter’s vote in a mid-major confirmation process last year, when they’re currently unemployed?

Before switching parties last April, Specter voted against Kagan’s nomination. At the time he complained about the response he got to questions during confirmation hearings, in written questions to Kagan and during her courtesy visit with him.
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“I have gone to really great lengths to find out about Dean Kagan’s approach to the law and approach to the job of solicitor general and get some of her ideas on the law because she is in a critical public policy making position. After the long process I have described, I still don’t know much about Dean Kagan.”

Hours after Obama announced Kagan’s selection Monday to replace retiring Justice John Paul Stevens, Specter praised her exemplary academic and professional credentials.

“I voted against her for solicitor general because she wouldn’t answer basic questions about her standards for handling that job,” Specter said. “It is a distinctly different position than that of a Supreme Court Justice.”

Specter would really help himself more if he just said, “I voted against her because I was a REPUBLICAN AND WE HAD TO, YOU IDIOTS, THAT’S WHY I SWITCHED PARTIES, JESUS CHRIST…” Then again, that may not help him, because it sounds mean.

John Kerry endorsed Specter today, though! That’s… a thing!

[FiveThirtyEight, Washington Post]

About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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53 comments

  1. Crank Tango

    ya know I am glad he joined us but I still tend to look at “was a republican up until last year” as a con.

  2. PineyWoodster

    That graph is like an optical illusion – if you look at the area inside the curves, it looks sort of like a penis – if you look at the area outside the curves, it looks sort of like a vagina.

    I blame the Reagan years, they messed me up…

  3. JMP

    It’s been pleasantly surprising and simple to watch Sestak’s rise in the polls. He started with his campaign ads just about a month ago, and most of them are just clips of Specter campaigning with Bush, Santorum and Palin, and the results are what you see above.

  4. Bearbloke

    [re=573966]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: If you Yanks would just banish the losing Presidential candidates, your politics would be free from McWALNUTS and Kerry – plus Al Gore would really prefer being a Canadian anyway…

  5. Mahousu

    At the time he complained about the response he got to questions during confirmation hearings, in written questions to Kagan and during her courtesy visit with him.
    So she shot him down, I take it?

  6. Aflac Shrugged

    As a Pennsylvania resident, I hope that if Sestak wins, he says whatever wingnut indefensible bullshit is necessary to get elected.

    Pittsburgh, Philadelphia and Alabama in between.

  7. StrangelyBrown

    So, if I read this graph correctly, the Uncircumcised Mardi Gras Cock of Voter Anger is about to fuck Specter up the ass? Where’s Santorum on all this?

  8. jus_wonderin

    Sestak? Were they not characters in “The Land of the Lost”. Oh, help me Will and Holly. I have fallen through a temporal vortex.

  9. snideinplainsight

    [re=573986]jus_wonderin[/re]: I was thinking of the non-PC black creatures in Uncle Wiggley.

  10. Jukesgrrl

    Quick, Arlen! Here’s how to get the Pittsburgh vote.

    Film an ad where you wander aimlessly around the room with Mrs. Specter, looking terrified, in a headlock. Look down at your crotch occasionally (proven win), and say, “People. Joe Sestak is a jagoff … ‘n at. So go up yer mum’s and bring ‘er down here to vote for me, Arlen Specter.” And then a cartoon Ben Roethlisberger with demon sheep eyes (another proven win), pops up and says, “Vote for him or I’ll poke your sister.” The the camera moves to Joe Lieberman who says, “He’s Arlen Specter, he’s as independent as I am, and he approved this message because I told him to.”

  11. Cape Clod

    Appearing with Snowbilly put a curse on both Specter and McCain. That woman is a political albatross.

  12. Schmegeg

    Arlen ran a couple of Swifty ads over the last few weeks, then cratered. According to the ads, Sestak was a hopeless, incompetent, traitor in a Clown costume, all while rising to Admiral of the High Seas in a 30 year career. People aren’t buying it and Arlen might be done.

  13. SayItWithWookies

    Sure, Specter voted against her, but that was when he was a scurrilous, opportunistic hack. Now he’s a paragon of integrity and a tireless defender of civil rights. Please don’t get the two confused just because they’re the same person.

  14. Mull_Man

    [re=573973]PineyWoodster[/re]: Mr. Woodster, a Dr. Rorschach on line one for you.

  15. Vulpes82

    I have to say, Sestak’s ads the past few weeks have been VERY effective. Whoever he’s paying to do them deserves the obscene amounts of money they’re ripping from the carcass of American democracy. Also, Specter’s about 104 and has had cancer seventy times; why on earth would anyone want to vote for THAT?

  16. Lascauxcaveman

    [re=573973]PineyWoodster[/re]: Yeah, ummm … not sure you should be blaming Reagan for that.

    More apt to blame teh Wonketts.

  17. JMP

    [re=573981]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: You’d think we would have learned our lesson after the years of embarrassment with the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter, but no, apparently a number of Pennsylvanians are seriously considering a new far-right, Club for Growth-approved nutcase.

    And then there’s the Gubernatorial election, which is looking like a mess right now.

  18. Katydid

    [re=573981]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: What are the political leanings of Pittsburgh, generally? I ask because one side of my ex’s family is from there, and he had a pretty dim view of the city because the older generation of his family that was born there pre-WWII is comprised of a bunch of anti-Semitic, racist motherfuckers. For example, his aunt remarked about me and his latest girlfriend, for absolutely no reason, “First a Jew, now a black,” while making weird noises with her tongue. She’s lovely, his aunt. We felt encouraged that she said Jew and black, frankly.

    Not to paint with too broad a brush or anything. What’s Pittsburgh like now?

  19. Beowoof

    Didn’t this guy help write the Warren Report, shoving a real penis, not a graphic renditon of one, up the anus of truth.

  20. Come here a minute

    “It is a distinctly different position…”

    Uh, Arlen, voters really don’t get that whole “this thing is different from that thing” thing. Does the phrase “voted for it before I voted against it” ring a bell? Think hard — maybe ask one of your new best friends.

  21. J.Robert Oppenheiner

    Pittsburgh is still comprised of anti-Semitic racist motherfuckers, but they are Democratic anti-Semitic racist motherfuckers.

  22. An Outhouse

    Kerry is on the pot again… as in smoking the pot again. Not some terrible intestinal disease.

  23. Jukesgrrl

    [re=574019]Katydid[/re]: Does she actually live within the city limits, or in one of the charming surrounding boroughs (similar to Ukranian gulags) like Beechview, Brentwood, Carrick, Greentree, Carnegie, Millvale, or Etna? Those residents like to say they live in Pittsburgh, but actually they only go to the city for Fourth of July fireworks and Steeler parades. They shop in the yuppie malls in the north, south, east, or west exurbs. If she does live in the city limits, she probably lives in a house built by her grandparents (free) in North Side, South Side, or Polish Hill (that’s the real name, not a pejorative), otherwise she would BE a Jew (Squirrel Hill), a Pitt student (Oakland), or African-American (everywhere else).

  24. DC Hates Me

    [re=574009]Vulpes82[/re]: I watched his ads and they are good but sort of artifically sweet. He should do an ad saying: Joe Sestak is chemotherapy for Pennsylvania.

  25. Norbert

    Arlen Specter
    Pert Cleanser
    Steel Prancer
    Replaces Rent
    Parcel Resent
    Scarlet R. Peen
    Rectal Preens
    Leper Canters
    Repels Nectar
    Clasp Reenter
    Clap Reenters
    Renal Scepter
    Pearl Centers
    Antlers Creep
    Rapes Lectern

    and so on

  26. friendlynerd

    [re=574075]Norbert[/re]: How could one person’s name be such a rich treasure-trove of words?

  27. Vulpes82

    [re=574073]DC Hates Me[/re]: Actually, I was talking about the ones with Specter being lauded by Bush, talking about how his party-switch would allow him to be reelected (with the evilest look on his face), and ending with a picture of him and Palin next to each other, asking about how Arlen Specter is doing all this to save ONE job, but what millions of jobs? Damned effective, if you ask me. And, yeah, the ones with all the vets are corny, but those kind always are, and he had to punch back against the “Sestak was a commie weakling (Rear Admiral with 30 years in service to his country)!” stuff.

  28. Jerk Cade

    [re=574037]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Or a yuppie (Shadyside)

    and I think you meant “get ‘er dahn here”

  29. DC Hates Me

    Well, the fact that he’s was a Navy Admiral means he couldn’t be a pure Quaker. Catholic, in fact.

  30. Katydid

    [re=574037]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Nope, city limits, or did. DEFINITELY not a Jew, as they are German Lutherans, and do not like my peoples at all. Their mom totally disowned my ex-father-in-law for marrying an Italian Catholic. Refused to talk to him for the rest of his life. They were very tolerant people, as you can see.

    [re=574065]chascates[/re]: That’s what I was thinking. “Jew” and “Black” are pretty good for what she was thinking and meaning. Strangely enough, she considers herself a liberal, so we were wondering why she a)had to comment at all and b)had to snort and cluck while she did so. My ex’s mother thought my ex was going to punch his 83-year-old aunt (last straw type of thing), but he didn’t, so all is well in the family. It’s just if you say “Pittsburgh” to my ex, you get a “Slowly I turn, step by step” moment.

  31. smitallica

    I’ve been a big fan of Specter’s comedy since the Magic Bullet Theory. Still a knee-slapper.

  32. FlownOver

    If this “uncut rentboy” graph ever meets up with the “bikini” unemployment graph, there’s gonna be trouble. Or confusion.

  33. Jukesgrrl

    [re=574129]Jerk Cade[/re]: I bow to your superior knowledge. How could I forget Shadyside! Must be because I stopped going there after The Gazebo closed.

  34. Jukesgrrl

    [re=574170]Katydid[/re]: Wow, she can’t deal with Catholics or Jews and she lives in Pittsburgh?! It’s a wonder she hasn’t starved to death. Not to mention, where does she find a doctor?

  35. Aflac Shrugged

    [re=574016]JMP[/re]: We elect a shockingly high number of Republican senators in Pennsylvania. Santorum defined the event horizon of how batshit an incumbent Republican needs to be, in order to lose a general election for the U.S. Senate around here. As long as Toomey keeps on a thong and pasties over his more objectionable beliefs, he’ll probably win.

    [re=574019]Katydid[/re]: Pittsburgh is really two cities. In one of them, you find ~70,000 undergrad/grad/professional students, and the working professionals who haven’t left (mostly lawyers and people working in the universities or the university hospital system). In the other, you have the yinzers, who may or may not remember the bottom dropping out of steel in western Pennsylvania. A lot more people vote Democratic than agree with most of the national party’s core tenets – I guess it’s just habit from the days where unions really ran shit.

    I stay inside the professional-student bubble and feel good about it.

  36. Crankenstank

    Kerry endorsing Specter? That’s really slumming for a billionaire to stoop to endorsing a mere millionaire, especially after Kerry won the Balls Contest for marrying the previous Senior Senator from Pennsylvania’s widow and diving into the pool on her estate, naked, while it was filled with nothing except for thousand-dollar bills and the tears of the exploited working classes. I mean, maybe if Meg Whitman were running for Senate in Pennsylvania, I could see it…

  37. DC Hates Me

    [re=574155]Bearbloke[/re]: Yes, Nixon was a non-pacifist Quaker, as was Betsy Ross. It happens but it’s not traditional. Black sheep.

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