Racing to beat the Monday opening of world financial markets, European leaders decided, “Eh, how about a trillion dollars, would that work?” And then somebody screamed (in German), “IDIOT THIS IS ABOUT THE EURO.” And then everybody was all, Right, Euros, that’s kind of the problem, isn’t it?” So, this 750-billion-Euro package of loans and guarantees plus $40 billion US from the IMF should, uh, put off “Acropolis Now” for who knows, maybe a couple of years. Please return to the Economic Recovery now, and pay no attention to the Greek Riots. You know how the Greeks are, so melodramatic and with the “cradle of democracy” and such. Minus Greece and, uh, all those scary computers and the permanently unemployed American underclass and the collapse of the basic system of Capitalism, things are fine! [Bloomberg/Reuters] - That “containment dome,” which is actually a rectangular box, didn’t stop the BP oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico because of methane ice or something. The spill continues, with the oil slicks currently moving west instead of east. [Reuters/Globe and Mail]
- Sexy single senior Mark Sanford was spotted in Florida celebrating Mothers Day with his Argentine Mistress. [Gawker]
IT'S MORNING IN AMERICA
May 10, 2010
Trillion-Dollar Greek Lotto Payout Approved by EU, World Economy Saved?
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Those Europeans could still put on one hell of a bake sale! Or they could sell GS (Greek Scout) cookies. Don’t ask for money until you’ve really TRIED, Greece.
[re=573408]PsycGirl[/re]: Is that baklava made out of real Greeks?
Given a choice, I still would rather bail out Greece than AIG. Something to do with the fact that I just can’t get the same hard on fantasizing about credit default swaps as about Patmos or, even better, Simi.
We’re all doomed. Except for John McCain. Because this is all good news for John McCain somehow.
How will the bailout affect my trip to Mykonos this summer? Will the rentboy price be impacted? Will the price of umbrellas at SuperParadiseBeach go up or down? These are the questions everyone must have answered.
A “Greek Riot” is when you throw gyros at the police instead of firebombs, right? I wonder how many are like half-eated before they’re thrown because the beef/yogurt sauce combo is the shit.
I’ve really been bothered by people calling the box a dome. Thanks Ken. Apparently the next BP plan is to pack the leaking oil hole with trash. These BP engineers are brilliant.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8672181.stm
Also, how the hell has no one snapped a picture of this Argentinian hottie that Sanford is pal-ing around with yet?
I’m happy for Mark Sanford.
Does that make me bad?
Acropolis Now: I didn’t think of that, goddammit!
I thought ten commandments was about hell and damnation when one violates gawd’s lawz by sticking one’s weenus into the vajay of a woman who wasn’t one’s wife. Not “If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with” of 1970s Hippie Liebrul Forgive’em Jeebus.
And BP was aware of the whole methane/ice issue when they started building the Displeasure Dome but that contingency was planned for just like the blowout at 5,000ft depth scenario: ‘It’s so unlikely as to be unnecessary to plan for…’ Now they are at Walmart shopping for a box elephantine, super-maxi-flow tampons and a carton of duct-tape.
Speaking of Europe, I love it when the wingnut Daily Mail tries to spin Cameron as an ordinary guy after it really couldn’t avoid calling his grade school “elitist” because it had 3 bathrooms: Men, Women, Chauffers.
Top that, arugula crowd!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/election/article-1275912/How-David-Cameron-met-Queen-dressed-rabbit–school-play-35-years-ago.html
[re=573429]ella[/re]: Does Cammy have a cottage where he trims hedges?
In that case, REGULAR GUY.
[re=573420]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: “Apparently the next BP plan is to pack the leaking oil hole with trash. ”
What the hell? The ocean isn’t polluted enough already??
Sanford and South Carolina would have been much better off if he’d just gotten divorced and hooked up with his alleged soulmate to begin with – but that would have meant a lot less entertainment for the rest of us.
Good to see the EU rescue Greece! Now they just have Ireland, Spain, Portugal, and probably several other countries I can’t think of right now to go. Of course, they could just lower interest rates further and allow some inflation, which would actually help everyone involved; but no, the Germans won’t allow that, they have to see people suffer.
This bailout is just incredible. There is very little prospect that throwing more money at the problem is going to help. They (as we in the US with our stimulus programs) are just delaying the inevitable: it’s gonna get nasty.
We are so freakin’ doomed.
[re=573444]proudgrampa[/re]:
I like the girth of your mirth.
$40 million US from the MILF?
[re=573408]PsycGirl[/re]: They could mow lawns and get a paper route too. There are always alternatives. Me thinks the Greeks might be lacking innovative ideas…or lazy.
I feel I must protest (again) the stereotypical Frenchman picture. The cliché is deficient without stink lines and a baguette.
“Pack the leaking hole with trash.”
A euphemism if I ever heard one. Nudgenudgewinkwink. Know what I mean?
[re=573472]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: And a string of onions around the neck, also.
[re=573422]CthuNHu[/re]: Your lack of schadenfreude disturbs me.
There is only one proper way to respond to this sort of news
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfPg5LjGYz8
Why the hell isn’t Superman stopping that oil leak? Is he off-planet?
[re=573472]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Today it’s a stinky *Greek* man, who, uh, drooled blood into his retsina. The pita bread is in his pants.
The EU is doing to the entire Greek Nation what the Greek men have been doing to their wives, girl friends, male friends, etc., since ancient times. Relax and have a smoke and enjoy some Baklava Atheniens and oh by the why don’t you try paying taxes occasionally.
[re=573441]JMP[/re]: The actually have an acronym for the potential trouble members of the EU – PIIGS.
(Porutgal, Ireland, Italy,
Greece, Spain).One down, four to go!
Oh, man. I feel sorry for The Argentine Firecracker. I was sorta hoping she’d dump him, too.
Mark probably prefaces every date with: Of course, this is dutch treat!
What a catch.
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