The Nightmare in the Gulf of Mexico claimed another victim Monday: Arnold Schwarzenegger’s big plan to fund California’s cash-starved state parks with offshore drilling along the coast where the most popular state parks are located. It was the kind of brilliant piss-everybody-off scheme that Schwarzenegger has excelled at during his seven years as governor. So the parks are still broke. For his bonus round, Arnold vetoed a popular bill that would’ve banned cigarette smoking on state beaches. Oh, and the “Governator” also made public his support for Obamacare and is fighting the oil industry’s attempts to repeal California’s alternative energy law. Everybody unhappy now? Good! [Mercury News/SF Gate/LA Times/Associated Press] - At least 28 people were killed after heavy flooding hit the Nashville area. More than 15 inches of rain fell over the weekend and rivers spilled over towns. [CNN/The Tennessean]
- Times Square fail-bomb suspect caught at JFK, trying to fly fly away. [CNN]
- It will be awesome when DC makes “medical marijuana” legal, because then this whole District of Potheads can make up some ailment that requires the marijuana they already smoke all the time. Washington is the dopiest city in America! [Washington Post]
IT'S MORNING IN AMERICA
May 4, 2010
Oil Disaster Spoils Arnold’s Fun, Tennessee Floods, Washington Gets High
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{ 35 comments }
Maria Shriver really hasn’t aged well in that pic.
Much like his movie career, Ahnuld da Gubbinater starts off like a Barbarian and ends up turning everything into a bad comedy while the rest of Kaliphonya keeps telling themselves that the cause of their heads “It’s not a toomah.”
If there is one person I would like to see high, it’s Michelle Bachman. Only problem is, will we know the difference.
US prisons to be full of incompetent terrorists by 2030
[re=569613]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Oh yeah, Bachman on the dopez will be very easy to spot: those scary-ass googly eyes should drop to half mast, allowing a few of the half-eaten children that are still ambulatory to attempt an escape.
I think a smoking ban would be very helpful on Louisiana’s beaches right about now, but if there are no off-shore Oil Wells of Death to make California’s beaches extra-flammable Arnie was probably right to veto the bill.
April showers bring May disasters.
I nominate this guy who was arrested to be known as:
“The Home Depot” Bomber
Forget about
unlawful drilling off
California for the
Known future
Yesterday was all about
Offshore drilling but
Until now I though it was a good idea
signed arnie
Wonder how some of the backwards fundies feel about the literal translation of the Book of Revelations setting up so much production’round their way? Are those Four Horsemen not just the dreamiest? Let’s ask Pat Robertson.
In defense of Arnold, beaches make excellent ashtrays.
DC the dopiest city in the country? Oh hells no. Obviously you haven’t been to Colorado since we legalized medicinal marijuana. Or, maybe ever? Because you can’t throw a rock in this state without hitting someone who’s already stoned. Since we passed the MMJ laws, though, it’s just plain high-larious. My one advance warning would be to be ready for a massive influx of shitty weed as soon as MMJ is legalized, because everyone and their mother will try to make some money off the situation; which leads to a huge amount of weed stores selling bad product by the gram.
Bombing of Times Square or cleaning the garage goes horribly wrong? You decide!
I can’t believe these clowns were able to pull off 9/11 in the first place.
Isn’t it time the celebrities save the with a oil spill telethon?
[re=569629]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: The guys with the CIA training really stand out from the crowd.
[re=569629]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: It’s amazing what you can do when you have the help of the CIA, the head of security for your target building and the Vice President of the United States.
District of Colombian.
Can’t he just make more movies and donate the proceeds? Perhaps he can make a few shorts, haha.
After looking at some more photos of the oil rig fire, it occurs to me the price we are going to pay for Sean Connery and Jill St. John destroying Ernst Stavro Blofeld’s secret SPECTRE headquarters is going to be entirely too high. And Blofeld will be back anyway, though whether he looks like Telly Savalas, Donald Pleasance, Max Von Sydow or Dick Cheney remains to be seen.
[re=569629]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: All the smart ones are in management. Only a retard would blow himself up, obviously. Sarah Palin should keep a close eye on Trig. No chemistry sets for Christmas!
[re=569614]Hello Sunshine[/re]: Lames “The Onion” imitators really make you appreciate how well “The Onion” is written.
[re=569670]Lazy Media[/re]: If you think that’s bad, you should read the HILARIOUSLY IRONIC message boards at Free Republic. Oh, wait, that’s real. Um. Carry on.
Who knew the terminator was a socialist???
I was kind of hoping the Times Square bomber would be a white dude of the wingnut persuasion, also.
[re=569665]Baldar T Flagass[/re]: But he was hoarding the world’s diamonds! Think of the engagement rings! Plus, he unjustly imprisoned Jimmy Dean, which is something we as a nation simply will not stand for.
[re=569626]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: AND, if a smoker should start a fire, you got the water right there to put it out.
[re=569713]Way Cool Larry[/re]: But the suspect is just starting to talk. I bet there are more involved. After all, who has so many propane tanks on their porches that they are willing to sacrifice some for the cause? Crackers, that’s who.
[re=569706]Way Cool Larry[/re]: Well, they weren’t called National Socialists for nothin’ :
http://www.indybay.org/newsitems/2003/09/03/16399261.php
Can someone at Wonkette PLEASE mock the hell out of this Jonah Goldberg Corner thing: http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=MWM0MmU3NzliZWY0OTE2NjhhMWY3Yjg0YThlMWUzMTY=
Nashville floods getting much national airplay, because we’re behaving with too much civility. No looting, no screaming people in the streets holding babies. What’s wrong with us? Get with the damn program Nashville. If you want to be a victim you’ve got to behave like a victim.
There is also the fact that FEMA was on hand before the flooding began in earnest, so there’s that, Dick.
We also still have water and, most of us, electricity and internet, so while it really sucks and all, it isn’t anything compared to Katrina. Though the constant helicopter fly-overs are getting a little annoying.
But still, text REDCROSS to 90999 to donate $10 to the Red Cross efforts here in middle Tennessee. I hate the Red Cross for obscure Katrina-related issues, but they still, they do mostly really good work (and those issues appear to have been resolved this time around).
[re=569609]Ye Olde Fap-Smith[/re]: Thread done in one.
[re=569729]proudgrampa[/re]:
Seeing that most of our beaches are saturated with oil (or soon will be)you might want to rethink that thought.
[re=569626]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Hahaha. You’re probably the asshole who goes out of his way to use my planter box as an ashtray when there’s an open storm sewer drain 5 feet away.
This man eats a well balanced diet, gets plenty of excersize and hydrates properly. Rest assured that when (not if) he comes around to shit in your cereal, it will be firm, well segmented, and show evidence of high fibre foods.
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