Here’s the best clip we could find of Charlie Crist announcing his departure from the Republican party this afternoon. Our chief criterion in judging these clips was, “Which one makes him look the most colored?” This contribution from YouTube user “nancynipple” easily wins; her television shows the heroic governor sporting something of a deep rouge paste with a twist of orange, depending on the light, but not really even depending on the light. Why would anyone vote for this monster? [YouTube]
TURNING POINTS IN AMERICAN POLITICAL HISTORY
April 29, 2010
Is It Okay To Call Someone ‘Colored’ If That Person Is Charlie Crist?
Previous post: Previous Post
Next post: Goldman Sachs, The Bank, Will Be Put In Bank Jail
{ 70 comments }
He’s been Boehnerized!
They call Chas Heat Miser,
What ever ween he touch
Starts to melt in his clutch
He’s too much!
Baggerized.
Who knew Charlie was an Oompa Loompa
nancy nipples from dippy naples?
Whoa, there! He almost thanked his family before his God. So glad he realized his error before it was too late. Whew, that was close.
Fuck off, Charlie. You pathetic miserable closet case. You pushed the ban on gay marriage and the wingnuts still won’t show you the LOVE. The sooner you fall into obscurity, the better.
I love how, right around the 2:00 mark, the (R) disappears from the screen.
[re=567439]schvitzatura[/re]: I roffled
He says he won’t have the help of either party after this announcement…but delightfully, as was explained to me by Redstate, he has taken all the Republican Committee’s money and bought TV ads with it- in reserved slots all the way thru November! Har Har! Redstate claims that if he didn’t do that the RNC or NRSC or whatever could have got a lot of it back.
“Sorry Mr Green, we need another $500, that other Senate Candidate became an independent, so now we have to find more money for this Mexican guy Rubio.”
Now i need a campari and orange juice.
Plus, “Nipple”!!!
We need to do a study to see if orange people are in fact less intelligent.
He STILL doesn’t get it that the purpose of a political wife is to stand plastered at his side gazing up at him adoringly? All that effort and expense for nothing?! Maybe he can rent some Santorum kids to cry when he concedes.
[re=567453]Way Cool Larry[/re]:
Dude, John Boehner. Charlie Crist.
No further study is required.
Well, sure! After all, everybody is some color. (Except Griffin.)
Illegal in Arizona.
[re=567454]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Is that the chick to his left who looks like Laura Linney with her chin filed to a point?
[re=567453]Way Cool Larry[/re]: Well, there’s this Robb Smith fellow, who makes a lot of *interesting* claims about politics and economics.
http://bit.ly/aggqCc
Snoop around, he’s orange like Ernie.
[re=567448]NYNYNY[/re]: That is probably false, but it would be hilarious if Red State was actually correct for once.
Orange Crush?
Follow me, please follow me
I’ve got my cash, I’ve got my orange skin
Yeah screw you, Macro, screw you
I’ve got my cash, I’ve got my orange skin
I am an agent of the tanned
I’ve been teabagged and now its time to
Serve the wang state in Washington (vote for me, please vote for me)
Coming in fast, vote for me
Someone recap…why is he not running for re-election as popular governor to run for unpopular U.S. senator again?
This seemed like a career move worthy of another orange colored freak associated with Miami…David Caruso.
[re=567453]Way Cool Larry[/re]:Don’t be a bigot, we’re all Gods little miracles.
Unlike some of our fellow Wonketeers, I can’t find it in my heart to slam Charlie (lookin’ at you [re=567443]Roscoe[/re]) for taking all the Republican parties munniez and then jumping ship to run as an independent. He is the victim of our broken political system, a poor soul crushed betwixt the wheels of Conservative politics run amok.
Do you think that Charlie wants to be anti-gay? Hell no, the man brushes his teeth with tube steak, he just wants to be Preznit one day and is that so bad? He’d be our first big gay orange Preznit (well, the first one since Grover Cleveland anyway) it would be just like when we elected Hopey except, of course, with more transvestites at the inauguration.
He actually married a Vaj keeper in his doomed effort to convince the troglodytes that he was one of them. Can’t you feel a little pity for the man? I mean, can you imagine being married to a woman and not enjoying the naughty bits? As any hetero man will tell you, if it weren’t for the naughty bits, there’d likely be a bounty on the wimmins. They are of-the-devil, the proof is nothing natural could possibly bleed for three days and not die.
Charlies got one, but he doesn’t want her. Charlies a Republican governor, but he doesn’t want them either. There is only so much torment a human being should be forced to endure in his quest to become Americas big orange gay Preznit and Charlie just hit the wall. Something had to give, and it was a the troglodytes that got tossed under the bus.I can only say “good pick”. He might one day come to enjoy the wife, nobody is ever going to want those troglodytes though…
What color is Charlie’s carpet?
The drapes say “white”, but the throw pillows say “Grecian”.
Funny, he has white hair and orange skin, but his beard is brunette.
His family’s original last name was Christodoulou. WHY R U ASHAMED UV BEING TEH GREEK, CHARLIE???
Orange Charlie sounded a lot more rational than the teabaggers in that speech. Srsly, we could use a lot more Orange Charlies and a lot fewer PalinBachmannFoxxOilyTaint types.
I’m pretty sure when you let the Devil take your soul, this happens to your skin. It is called pulling a Boehner.
[re=567474]Extemporanus[/re]: Charlie’s probably got more of a terrazzo going on.
He is so getting tackled the next time he goes to Phoenix.
[re=567469]BarackMyWorld[/re]: ever notice how much the senate gets done? The fucking maytag repair man would run for senate if he could get the backing.
[re=567449]yargisbargis[/re]: Charlie’s favorite drink is a “Slippery Nancy Nipple”.
It’s pretty similar to a regular “Slippery Nipple”, only one drinks out of a size 11 pump while weeping softly on the floor of a votive-lit closet.
[re=567479]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: Terrazzo would compliment his fancy crystal fixture quite nicely.
[re=567474]Extemporanus[/re]: That turned me off sex permanently. Thanks very much.
[re=567461]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: I think all the pointy chins are the sisters he refers to so uncharmingly as “Charlie’s Angels.” I wanted to see the parents to check out what color they are. I know a lot of Greeks, but have yet to meet an orange one.
Here is a lovely picture of the governor and his equally orange wife-unit, who did the Republican thing and married within her race.
http://blogs.tampabay.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/11/22/tb_crist_300_46914a.jpg
PS: Google the wedding pictures of Charlie Crist and Carole Rome. They rival the infamous Nathan-Giuliani nuptials for middle-aged princess fabulousness.
That there is orangeitude.
today, we are all orange nancynipples.
Strategy Session weekly conference with the Beloved Leader George Soros intercepted by Redstate:
”
For the democrats to win in Florida, we must not allow Christ to be outed as a flaming homosexual! Doing so would force his Republican supporters into the swarthy, sculpted arms of El Rubio.
Our militant homosexual operatives will enforcing the message of silence in the Piña Colada jack shacks and rum-soaked Jimmy Buffet’s Pumpin’ Stations all across the Florida pink belt.
Every liberal den of iniquity across the state must know that no matter how salacious, steamy, or Vitter-like the details may be, Gov. Christ’s sexual adventuresmust remain a secret. At least until December.
I have also now commanded my media minions to stay with the story that Christ is married. To a woman… Ha ha ha! Ooooh! Ha Ha! OK, that still cracks me up!
Silence is golden and must be kept in persuit of our aims. The truculent Acorn Pimp’s charade only hinted at what we all know is really going on under my leadership.
Death to America!
NWO for ever!
Mwuhahaha! Yaaahahahah!
“
oops, ignore the extra h…
lol
Earth people have funny noses, especially the OrangePinks.
What are those, anal probes?
(probosci)
I don’t need no orange falafel-eating socrates reading oil head to tell me about ‘merica.
Aah, the low hanging fruit is tempting, and orange, but I can’t go with the rampant cynicism tonight. (jeez, what am I saying?) Taking the pubs money and running on your own is absolutely awesome. One more chance for Michael Steele to make a truly hilarious explanation of exactly what is happening with RNC funds. Charlie Crist may actually be the most liberal Floridian capable of being elected to statewide office. Oh, yeah, right, fuck him then. But no matter, at this point I’m totally in favor of a politician that is all about expediency and money, that at least I can understand!
It’s like the offspring from a Roger Sterling/blueberry union.
[re=567461]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: That’s actually one of his sisters. She is a pediatric oncologist and, truthfully, one of the coolest women I’ve ever met (she’s married to a guy I work with). I can’t speak much for her brother, but she is awesome.
Why would anyone vote for this monster?
Because the race is basically between a monster on the outside and a monster on the inside?
Sorry, but I just can’t take him serious. There’s no red headed Asian Male behind him.
[re=567500]norbizness[/re]: or blueberry violet from “charlie and the chocolate factory”.
Looks we got a Floridian 3-way.
Ummmm yay?
[re=567446]Serolf Divad[/re]: 2:15 – the very moment Crist officially became a french ghey homasekyul librril muslin commie from kenya…
[re=567499]Jazzman[/re]: Bob Graham used to represent Florida, so who knows — it could elect a liberal again. And while Crist’s election would be a great step for Tangelo-Americans, I’d still like to see another Democrat in there. Not only for the vote in critical situations, but also because of how apoplectic the Republicans would be if they lost seats this election.
What does Sheriff Arpaio have to say about this? That’s what I’m waiting to hear.
[re=567477]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Crist isn’t ashamed of being Greek! In fact, he plans to honour his heritage in his campaign posters – like this one targeted to the ‘youth vote’…
[re=567509]SayItWithWookies[/re]: you racist. the preferred nomenclature is oompa-americans. i also wonder how it would play out if meek forced rubio to talk about his position on the arizona immigration bill.
[re=567511]Bearbloke[/re]: how did you find mark foley’s screensaver?
Mrs. Crist is kinda cute. Do you suppose they have an understanding?
♫ Bain de Soleil for that ugly fake tan ♪ ♫
Can’t he just join the Orange Party? Oh wait–that’s Kenyan. No can do.
nancynipple gave Boehner a boner
[re=567515]Aurelio[/re]: Just keep a lid on it. I’m sure she’d appreciate and enjoy some male company. Girl needs what a girl needs after all.
[re=567515]Aurelio[/re]:
Like she lets Charlie play naked bipartisan twister with Lindsey Graham and Eric Massa? hmmm maybe.
[re=567515]Aurelio[/re]: She dresses up like a Bondage Banana with a whip and calls him a “little orange bastard”, which he likes. The safe word is ‘Julius’.
Any Greek speakers here who can give us some insight into the proper translation of the name Christodolou? Christ, something.
[re=567525]gurukalehuru[/re]: The proper translation from the Greek is “Christ-whatta-homo”…
[re=567525]gurukalehuru[/re]: Wept. “Christ wept”.
Maybe it’s wepped. Floridian conjugates differently.
He looks messican to me.
He has the spray-on tan lobby all locked up…
I’d like to thank God, family, and Rustoleum — for their Chrysler Hemi Orange spray paint.
[re=567443]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: And the harlots behind him nod in relief when he corrects the pecking order–”God first”, Whewh!
[re=567446]Serolf Divad[/re]: Amazing.
One down, 55 million to go.
[re=567544]bitchincamaro[/re]: Welcome to Florida, where a seemingly otherwise sane politician has to mention God or Jesus every 2.2 minutes or he won’t get elected.
Remember, this is the state that went something like 42% for Wallace in the 1972 Dem primaries, and has brought us eldrich horrors like Disneyworld, Terri Schiavo, Casey Anthony, O.J. Simpson golfing while looking for his wife’s killer, George Bush Jr., et al…
[re=567446]Serolf Divad[/re]: smooth move, NBC 2
[re=567443]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: Dude, you do NOT want Marco Rubio. You just don’t.
Charlie goes Independent and the right wing nutz go wild.
Arlan Spector changed parties (at least twice, as I recall)and they got their panites all in a bunch about that.
Joe Lieberman became an Independent because he was going to get shelacked in the primary and he was a principled, high-minded human being.
How do they know which is which?
Vote lobster people!
Comments on this entry are closed.