- The Supreme Court will consider the constitutionality of Wii Golf and other obscene games that were never meant for children. [Hit & Run]
- Barack Obama had a friendly chit-chat with a group of “Muslim entrepreneurs.” Heavens, is that what the liberal media is calling terrorists these days? [The Caucus]
- San Francisco is boycotting Arizona (no more getting gay-married in the Grand Canyon, et cetera) because of its new and awesome Alien and Seditious Mexican Act. [Think Progress]
- FreedomWorks receives dozens of emails every single day, and most of them are from liberals who want FreedomWorks to eat a turd casserole and die. [RedState]
- Some lady stumbled upon Our President while hiking in the mountains and then frantically yelped, “Are you who I think you are?” And then Obama replied, “Sasquatch? No, I am someone else,” and then the Secret Service broke her camera just for good measure. [Swampland]
May 26, 2012
RUMORS ON THE INTERNETS
April 27, 2010
Barack Obama Caught Hanging Out In The Woods, Was Probably Smoking Weed
by Riley Waggaman 4:55 pm April 27, 2010
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According to Ottumwa Police records, a 25-year-old Illinois man was arrested after a Secret Service search of his backpack hours before a visit by President Barack Obama.
Police records indicate Thomas Persino, from Des Plaines, Ill., is charged with prohibited acts and possession of drug paraphernalia. The arrest happened at Indian Hills Community College while Secret Service agents were securing the area.
An ABC News spokesman said Persino was hired as a soundman to cover the presidential visit.
The spokeman said, “As has been our practice for the past decade, we hired a local cameraman to cover an event today in Iowa. That cameraman in turn hired a local soundman who was detained by the Secret Service after they discovered marijuana in his backpack. The Secret Service notified local authorities who have taken the soundman into custody. While we did not hire this soundman directly, we certainly regret that the Secret Service and local authorities had to waste their valuable time dealing with this matter.”
http://www.kcci.com/news/23280952/detail.html
In Iowa, we welcome our President with weed, not loaded weapons.
the president was hiking to argentina?
Yes, RedState, anonymous voice mails and email left by some assholes are the equivalent of rhetoric used by the actual speakers at teabagger rallies and their media spokesmen.
Wonketteers should turn their attention to Tabitha Hale. She’s a “Christian. American. Capitalist.” It’s never too late for a new subject of scorn and reprobation. Maybe she can go to work for Philip Anschutz.
[re=565594]JMP[/re]: I don’t know, most of the comments sounded like accurate descriptions of the teabaggers and their supporters.
Arizona is the new Utah.
No snark…if I were to meet President Obama in a similar situation, I’d probably have a heart attack from the excitement.
And then I’d see if I could get Barry to dump Michelle and run away with me.
I feel sorry for all those innocent crystal sellers and reiki therapists in Sedona — hopefully they’ve got some good waves saved up for a rainy day.
LEAVE JOHN ADAMS ALONE
Notice how Riley doesn’t post until late in the afternoon? Is this an afterschool job or is he working undercover writing a scoop?
Ya know it would have been pretty funny if Obama had responded “Who, Mark Sanford? Nope!”
“Some lady stumbled upon Our President while hiking in the mountains and then frantically yelped, “Are you who I think you are?”
She could have just yelled “Skunk Ape!!!!!” and been done with it.
I once had a chance, isolated encounter with then-President and Mrs. Clinton, in June 1994 in an empty bookstore in Oxford, England, when they were coming back to the US from the D-day observances in Normandy. A lot of things to say go through your mind quickly:
A. Why are you following me?
B. Death to the oppressor of Ingushtan!
C. Say, where can a fellow get his ashes hauled around here?
In fact, I, too, stammered like an idiot and shook hands.
[re=565615]Gorillionaire[/re]: I was thinking more along the lines of him using his best Gomer Pyle voice “SURPRISE! SURPRISE! SURPRISE!”
Riley, you’re the best. Don’t ever change.
[re=565590]slappypaddy[/re]: Beat me to it. But anyway: I didn’t know Barry liked to “hike the Appalachian Trail.”
The two important things are: 1) He did not require a tELeppROMptEr or scribbles on his palm to deliver a sassy rejoinder, and 2) that he obviously self-identifies with sasquatch (a mysterious but mostly benign forest dweller) rather than wendigo (also mysterious but overtly malevolent). Maybe there is hope for the republic after all.
Didn’t Hitler like to spend his vacation time hiking the nature trails at the Berchtesgaden? Also.
[re=565581]GOPCrusher[/re]: Back in my day, at my community college, it was practically illegal to NOT have weed in your backpack. We had some students sharing their ‘special blend’ with the pipe-smoking profs, at lunch, in the quad.
C’mon, people, we’re talking community colleges here.
[re=565637]WadISay[/re]: A friend of mine with a timeshare in Hawaii got to actually use your line (a) with Bill Murray, who he keeps bumping into on the beach in Kauai. Apparently Mr. Murray also has a condo in the nabe.
I was going to visit the Grand Canyon on my vacation this year, but I’ve decided to visit America’s other great gaping hole – the Arizona state legislature – instead.
Without violent video games how will we ever raise the next generation of high-tech warriors? The GOP will be back in power eventually, people forget…
[re=565581]GOPCrusher[/re]: It’s getting harder and harder to find sober soundpeople.
But the question on everyone’s mind should be: Does a Barry shit in the woods?
Smoking weed? Of course! I bet he was snorting coke, eating mushrooms, and “using” poppers too!
I think you’ve hit upon something. It could be that the real threat to real ‘Merika is the influx of seditious Alien Mexicans, a la, “Brother from Another Planet”. But not to worry. Soon the minutemen from another planet will come and take them back.
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