The Florida House just voted to make attacking homeless people a hate crime, and state Rep. Paige Kreegel, MD, (R-Punta Gorda) is not celebrating. He’s unhappy because Florida’s homeless are “bums” who just lounge about in beach chairs drinking orange juice out of those plastic citrus fruit thingies all day long, and now this bill comes along and gives the shiftless hobos more rights than his poor wife and children currently enjoy.
“The bill is creating a new protected class of people based on the fact that they’re not voters, they’re not taxpayers and they live on the streets,” said Kreegal, who knows that homeless people do not vote or have to pay sales taxes because he read this on a Republican blog.
Anyway, it doesn’t really matter what this Kreegel thinks about this new legislation, because the House reps who voted for it were more impressed by a Ft. Lauderdale homeless man’s oppression (being attacked by teenagers, which was caught on video) than with fake oppression stories a la Kreegel. Now an identical bill will go to the Senate, and if it passes then will either go back to the House or Charlie Crist will sign it in suntan lotion, if he’s feeling liberal that day. And Paige Kreegel can go back to his favorite hobby, which is scanning the police blotter for items about bums getting the shit beat out of them:
“I like to read the police blotter in my newspaper,” Kreegel said. “I noticed that there are crimes against the homeless bums there. And generally, they seem to be perpetrated not by members of the Legislature or women and children, but mainly by other homeless bums out there.”
{ 76 comments }
wait wait wait, is he really a rep from “fat whore, FL”?
His name is Paige? I hope he gets beat by a homeless guy tonight.
That’s not suntan lotion
All I’m getting from this is that it’s totally okay to go beat the crap out of Paige Kreegel’s wife and kids. That is what he’s saying, right?
Let’s play guess the GOP peccadillo…
I’m guessing he was an investor in Bum Fights DVDs.
Worst treatment of dem bums since Walter O’Malley.
“I like to read the police blotter in my newspaper, Kreegle said.”
With a name like “Paige Kreegle”, I’m guessing he does so using his vagina muscles.
It’s estimated that 1/3 of the homeless in this country are veterans. Nice dingleberryness, Paige, you hateful a**hat.
[re=562145]Cicada[/re]:
Only if you burn down his house first so that they’re homeless.
Rep Zack Wamp (R., TN) will fight ferociously to retain the “Most Ridiculous Name of an Elected Official” championship belt. But “Paige Kreegal, MD” has got to be considered a serious contender. Plus, who doesn’t hate bums?
[re=562145]Cicada[/re]: I thought he was saying that he beats his wife and kids but not homeless bums. Because that’s the American way.
“Homeless have the right to live on the street and eat trash and filth. My kids don’t get to do such things. What’s up wit’ dat?”
Dick.bag.
Kreegel went on to say, “I can’t understand how the homeless can still be hungry, I just had a huge steak at The Palm.”
[re=562149]ManchuCandidate[/re]: [re=562153]skaboomizzy[/re]: Split decision for Win Of The Afternoon.
[re=562141]Crank Tango[/re]: No, that’s puta, not punta. Punta Gorda means “Kick the Fat Lady.” Figures that he’s into bum violence though.
Rep. Mark Pafford, D-West Palm Beach, said he, too, once thought homeless people were bums until he took a job in a homeless shelter. He said people become homeless for complex reasons.
“It’s a story that sometimes starts with abuse,” Pafford said. “It’s a story that sometimes starts with drug use, alcohol use. It’s a story that sometimes starts serving in the military defending this great country.”
HaHa! He tried to out-republican the refucklicans in the room with his “It’s a story that sometimes starts serving in the military defending this great country.” However, they were WAY ahead of him – to that quote, they always say, “if he were a true military hero, he would have DIED in the service of his country – instead, he came home and got hooked on them liberal drugs and got all bummy… U-S-A, U-S-A!!!”
Hey! Nice bums!
Dr. Kegel has a point. Those drunken college kids will stop beating up bums, and start beating up doctor’s wives and kids instead. Because, you know, the penalties are less.
Reads police blotter = masturbate furiously to the Sear’s men’s underwear section before church.
[re=562155]V572625694[/re]: It’s not impossible. I used to bullseye Zack Wamp in my T-16 back home, they’re not much bigger than two meters.
Thanks Wonkette for today’s Cavalcade of Hate.
[re=562141]Crank Tango[/re]: that would be Puta Gorda.
[re=562161]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Or to put it another way, “Punta Gorda” = “No fatties.”
There’s all kinds of comments over there about how discouraging thrill-killing bums just encourages people to choose a life of vagrancy. I give 5 years before R-Fatty Point introduces a bill commissioning hobo-slaying death squads.
He hates them for their FREEDOMS
“It would be a lesser crime if they beat up my wife and kids,” Kreegle said. “How will you purport to get the message out to the homeless people that when they become hateful and want to beat somebody up that they need to go beat up my wife and kids instead of another homeless person?”
(I swear am not making that up, that is exactly the Miami Herald quote. Nice man.)
That law is a preemptive measure for when all Floridians are homeless next year. …and so Rubio can’t set up gladiatorial bum fight stadiums after he wins.
[re=562170]GoinGreen[/re]: I had one of those at Taco Bell the other night — I think her name was Cunsuelo.
…generally, they seem to be perpetrated not by members of the Legislature or women and children, but mainly by other homeless bums out there.
It’s not often you get to use Stanley Kubrick movies as an authoritative source for your political positions.
[re=562152]memzilla[/re]: [re=562175]snideinplainsight[/re]: Homeless is where the heartless is.
[re=562161]SayItWithWookies[/re]: [re=562170]GoinGreen[/re]: ah yes. my spanish is rusty this morning. good thing i don’t speak spanish then.
[re=562175]snideinplainsight[/re]: is he just jealous that a bum can beat the shit out of his family, but when he does it he gets in trouble?
Paige is a girl’s name.
This guy is just fucktard-tastic.
[re=562185]Crank Tango[/re]: I do advocate calling him Dr. Fat Whore, Florida, however.
[re=562191]Fox n Fiends[/re]: Isn’t there some kind of ethicamajigger you can get into if you mess around with Congressional Paiges?
I’m looking forward to the day his name is on the police blotter for groping anethetized patients.
Those aren’t homeless bums–that was me at spring break. And it wasn’t orange juice, either.
@snideinplainsight: I suppose the Florida legislature could turn assaults on women and children into hate crimes, too, but how would an average schmo like Rep. Paige Kreegel even know where to start something like that?
[re=562181]Extemporanus[/re]: Total win.
I thought beating the shit out of hoboes was as American as apple pie.
Just more socialism, I guess.
[re=562162]GoinGreen[/re]: When our beloved Katie Harris ran against Bill Nelson a few years ago she called him a “quitter” – I guess because he came back from outer space.
Another opponent, Rep. Charles McBurney, R-Jacksonville, questioned what group would next get hate crime protection.
“I could perceive hate crime bills in the future because of your appearance, because of what you wear, you’re too tall, you’re too short, you have long hair, you have no hair, you’re too heavy, flat feet,” McBurney said.
************
Or just because you’re an asshat like Kreegal or McBurney. Way to show that Christian love, you guys!
[re=562155]V572625694[/re]: There was a guy in Minnesota named Elwin Tinklenberger. He was state transportation sec. (I think) and ran against Michelle Bachman last time.
I don’t think he’s a hobo.
Thankfully, Kreegel did not stand alone. “(It) treats people unequally,” said Matt Gaetz, R-Fort Walton Beach. “This bill punishes people for their thoughts.”
Lauri’s description of bums makes me wish that beating up Jimmy Buffett fans (Parrotheads?) would be legal and possibly encouraged through subsidies/stimulus money.
If the homeless bums were real Americans, they’d be carrying around guns and defending themselves, of course.
When Bum Fights are illegal, only illegals will video tape bum fights.
And the Supreme Court will say it is all right for the good Doctor to own those tapes.
And let me guess, he’s also a “good Christian,” but of course sees no irony in hating bums. Karma is a bitch, idiot, keep playing around with her.
The Republican/Evangelical point of view is that people choose to be homeless, just like they choose to be gay or lesbian. If they only worked hard enough and prayed enough they would be wealthy. Or hetero.
Nothing makes you seem more like the common man, like hating on the homeless.
[re=562141]Crank Tango[/re]: That would be “Puta Gorda.” He’s from “Fat Point,” which is just sort of silly.
this is just another example of the influence that the homeless lobby wields over government.
How and why can closeted fruitbasket Paige represent Fat Poontang, Fla.???
We should make a distinction between bums and homeless. They could solve the homeless problem for the bums. Are there no empty foreclosed homes in Florida? No surplus FEMA shelters? No junk cars up on blocks? Florida just lacks the political will to solve this problem. Then they would no longer be homeless and could be beaten as readily and Paige’s family.
[re=562238]oldguy[/re]: “This bill punishes people for their thoughts.”
We certainly wouldn’t want to introduce the concept of intent into law, would we?
[re=562171]V572625694[/re]: I seriously doubt anyplace in Florida (or Amurika) could get away with a “no fatties” rule.
The hypocrisy of these allegedly jeebus-loving repubtards never ceases to amaze me. When was the last time you checked out Matthew 25:40, Paige?
It’s a stinking world because there’s no law and order anymore! It’s a stinking world because it lets you orange skins get on to the bums, like you done, Paige. Oh, it’s no world for an old bum any longer. What sort of a world is it at all?
Men on the moon, andmen spinning around the earth, and there’s not no attention paid to earthly law and order no more.Oh dear dear land I fought for thee!! THWACK!
[re=562145]Cicada[/re]: Only if you have a home and are gainfully employed. If so, yes yes yes.
Q: Would I entrust my ailing bod to a doctor named Paige Kreegel?
A: Not once I found out she was a guy.
So, he thinks stupid should have a classification all it’s own?
Stupid people should have special protection?
[re=562265]TakingAmes[/re]: i guess it’s better than being from rat mouth.
For the record, please don’t confuse bums with hobos.
Hobos, in fact, are now referred to as “urban outdoorsmen, seeking low cost transportation”
[re=562430]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: ” , , , and practicing a cash-free economy.”
Paige Keagle should ask that beating up people with funny names, like Paige Keagle, be a hate crime. Also.
You know this guy is just pissed because going through life named Paige he has had his ass beat on a number of occassions. He is pissed because it is not a hate crime to beat up guys named Paige.
Isn’t Kreegle a rank in the klan? Exalted Grand Kreegle or something like it? Of course no one in the klan would give their kid a name like Paige. That’s damn near as bad as naming them Nathan or something…
Kegel – exercise of the muscles in the pelvic floor, purported to make an orgasm stronger.
Kreegel – exercise in stupidity on the Florida HOR floor – DEFINITELY making the state weaker!
Physician, choke thyself.
I was creeping along in traffic today in Punta Gorda, arguably the most congested Q-tip head city in America. These oldies frighten soooo easily, Paige (which sounds like a girls name ya’ namby-pamby) is playing to his audience. Punta Gordians would go ape shit for a proposition allowing the brutal murder of any man, woman, or child resembling a homeless type critter.
Funny how many of the same people who reject the theory of evolution tend to believe in “survival of the fittest”, isn’t it? William Jennings Bryan has to be spinning in his grave.
HA HA!! Paige is a girl’s name.
Fucking bums. Gonna light me one up tonite. Good times.
So, how many blow/hand-jobs would you guys predicts Mr(?) Paige gets in the average weak from the homeless dudes down at the Punta Gordo Home Depot?
HOT BUM-ON-BUM ACTION!!!
Comments on this entry are closed.