MEET YOUR CANDIDATES  2:53 pm April 20, 2010

Idaho Cartoon Villain Will Save Congress

by Jim Newell

GAH! So. Can we safely assume that Harley D. Brown, this thick anger-monster running for Congress in Idaho, is familiar with the one and only Super Tuber? [Harley D. Brown for Congress]

 
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{ 220 comments }

Way Cool Larry April 20, 2010 at 3:00 pm

So gay!

I hope Idahoans aren’t stupid enough to vote for him into office, but you can’t go wrong underestimating the idiocy of Americans.

Elephants Gerald April 20, 2010 at 3:00 pm

Rub with shortening or butter. Assume a wide stance, and with an apple corer or small knife, core from the back of Harley’s neck out his mouth. Push hot dog through the center. Bake until Harley be Brown.

SmutBoffin April 20, 2010 at 3:01 pm

“NEVER send a Marine where you can send a bullet and ALWAYS send the BIGGEST bullet you’ve got.”

The biggest bullet we’ve got, huh? I think your gargantuan head might just qualify.

sanantonerose April 20, 2010 at 3:01 pm

It’s so refreshing to see candidates who say what they mean and mean what they say.

ManchuCandidate April 20, 2010 at 3:01 pm

Spent most of his professional career working for the gubbiment. Check
Religious. Check
Professional Engineer. *sigh* Check
Advocating genocide so he can get cheap (radioactive) gas. Check
From Idaho. Check
Camo background on his website. Check

Tea-tard.

Extemporanus April 20, 2010 at 3:02 pm

“Nyuke-nyuke-nyuke!”

Dashboard_Buddha April 20, 2010 at 3:02 pm

Oh my fucking word. He’s a human cartoon.

Barrelhse April 20, 2010 at 3:02 pm

The guy is obviously both foolish and deranged, with ignorance pouring out of his ears- a shoo-in.

Sharkey April 20, 2010 at 3:03 pm

From the Bio:
“I was also a Taxicab driver and evangelist in Boise, ID where I led approximately 1,000 lost souls to the Lord Jesus Christ: Drunks and Winos, Hookers and Strippers, Bums, and Homeless; Hippies and Rainbow people, Bikers, and Villains, Truckers and Construction workers, Businessmen and Proletarians, psychos and weirdo’s, homos and lesbians; even some people who looked normal and smelled nice.”

That about does it.

SmutBoffin April 20, 2010 at 3:03 pm

“I was also a Taxicab driver and evangelist in Boise, ID where I led approximately 1,000 lost souls to the Lord Jesus Christ: Drunks and Winos, Hookers and Strippers, Bums, and Homeless; Hippies and Rainbow people, Bikers, and Villains, Truckers and Construction workers, Businessmen and Proletarians, psychos and weirdo’s, homos and lesbians; even some people who looked normal and smelled nice.”

“…who looked normal and smelled nice.”

oh my god

freakishlystrong April 20, 2010 at 3:03 pm

[re=560416]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Birther. Check.

Heywood Jablome April 20, 2010 at 3:04 pm

Yet again, in summary: “I have a tiny, fragile penis.”

bitchincamaro April 20, 2010 at 3:04 pm

Hardly Brown reminds me of this guy.

mocowbell April 20, 2010 at 3:05 pm

I’ve heard that Mitch McConnell shares Ed Wood’s fondness for angora sweaters. So Congress may just be the place for this Tor Johnson wannabe.

norbizness April 20, 2010 at 3:05 pm

He just told me that I can’t be Mr. Purple, there’s a guy out on another job with that name.

Fran Rogers April 20, 2010 at 3:06 pm

Of course he has to throw a bone to the homophobic base: “Keep the Queens Out of the Marines.” Hate is so much cuter when it’s in rhyming form, isn’t it?

Rich Tanguy April 20, 2010 at 3:06 pm

My new Facebook status – I considered myself the “intake manifold to the Kingdom of God”

JMP April 20, 2010 at 3:06 pm

Uh-huh. After browsing through that sight, my brain, it is a-sploding.

-Engineer. Why am I not surprised?
-And a birther, a racist, a misogynist and a homophobe. Those hatred tend to go together.
-So he really wanted to join the marines, but had to go to the Navy instead because of some accredidation thing. Uh-huh.
-Isn’t there just a bit of irony in a guy who was in the Civil Servie saying decrying big government?
-Career trajectory: Navy – gov’t Engineer – own engineering firm – truck driver – cab driver. Something tells me he wasn’t a very good engineer.

Yes, after reading what can charitably be called his thoughts, that Harley Brown, he’s a clown.

fakes April 20, 2010 at 3:07 pm

As a former Idahoan who has moved east, I am filled to the brim with regret I can’t vote him into office. The injustice!!!

Crank Tango April 20, 2010 at 3:07 pm

why does something tell me he is wearing latex under that suit?

Jim89048 April 20, 2010 at 3:08 pm

Cascadia weeps.

joementum April 20, 2010 at 3:09 pm

Is the phrase, “A real man for congress” part of that homosexual agenda I hear so much of?

A subversive way to get one of their kind into Congress?

They’re sneaky I say!

F*T*S* April 20, 2010 at 3:10 pm

I would be willing to go along with his energy plan as a pilot program, so long as both he and all of his supporters go in to take the gas immediately after the nukes hit. What a fucking jackass. You’d he would’ve taken the ben wa balls out of his ass before they snapped the publicity photo.

canadasteve April 20, 2010 at 3:11 pm

I always find it interesting how Americans diss people from the south. People from Idaho are waaaay scarier, IMHO.

Jumping Jim April 20, 2010 at 3:11 pm

Rejected slogans:
Nuke their bum, take their rum
Nuke their rear, take their queer
Nuke their tush, take their Bush
Nuke their rump, take their dump
Nuke their donkey, take their monkey

Jerri April 20, 2010 at 3:12 pm

He looks like if a Ren & Stimpy character came to life.

sezme April 20, 2010 at 3:12 pm

Is he talking about the gas that comes out of their ass? I haz a confused.

Jumping Jim April 20, 2010 at 3:12 pm

PS… Harley D. Brown… “D” stands for Davidson.

Dashboard_Buddha April 20, 2010 at 3:13 pm

“intake manifold to the Kingdom of God” Does this mean he’ll be sucking off dudes in some airport toilet?

Navy vs Marines? Natch – It ain’t gay if you’re underway.

Marxist-Leninist Papist April 20, 2010 at 3:13 pm

Wait..Is this for fucken serious ? Their is actually a pontential congress man with a website like that, or is this all a elaborate charade by some very snarky fellow lefties ? It is just not that obvious to me any more..

Mild Midwesterner April 20, 2010 at 3:13 pm

[re=560441]Jumping Jim[/re]: Nuke their orange, take their…. hmmm….

pub_option April 20, 2010 at 3:14 pm

Immigration Policy – Content Coming Soon.

Does that mean he can’t find a bumper sticker to copy?

canadasteve April 20, 2010 at 3:14 pm

[re=560412]Way Cool Larry[/re]: *Sigh* As a ‘gay’, I get really tired of people using ‘so gay’ to mean stupid or idiotic. Why not try ‘so jew’ or ‘so colored’ and see how well that goes over.

whiterabid April 20, 2010 at 3:14 pm

“If it is proven Obama is not the legitimate president, then everything he has done while in office and all the people he has appointed and everything they have done will be nullified.

“This would really dump hot coals into the shorts of those communist liberal progressive politicians.

“It would be like Luke Skywalker dropping his bomb into the ventilation shaft of the Death Star in “Star Wars.”

Good golly, miss molly. This guy thinks he is a super hero from a science fiction movie. He has my vote.

Oldskool April 20, 2010 at 3:14 pm

“Please consider sending a loud mouth passionate demolition expert to Washington DC.”
Why should we go to the trouble when we can watch Fox.

Cranky Little Camperette April 20, 2010 at 3:14 pm

I don’t think he gets what “Cartoons” are.

Dashboard_Buddha April 20, 2010 at 3:15 pm

[re=560442]Jerri[/re]: What are we going to do tonight, Brain? Same thing we do every night, Pinky.

bureaucrap April 20, 2010 at 3:16 pm

“Congress Needs Someone Crazy Like Me…”

QED.

ArkansasFred April 20, 2010 at 3:16 pm

He must be serious about this insane campaign, using the 4077th font and all.

Tomthebunny April 20, 2010 at 3:16 pm

Nice to see Uncle Fester getting work.

YellowKid April 20, 2010 at 3:16 pm

“Congress needs someone crazy like me to combat their insanity.”

There’s something wrong with this argument, but I can’t quite put my finger on it….

weejee April 20, 2010 at 3:17 pm

[re=560416]ManchuCandidate[/re]: He said he was a PE in Indiana – no PE license there, said he’s now a Spud – no PE in Spudsyvania. Did say he was a taxi driver in Idaho *sigh* lying sos, to fit him behind the wheel there would be no room for passangers.

Should be tard & fettered.

Lazy Media April 20, 2010 at 3:18 pm

It’s always the REMFs who brag about the military the most. And this guy is a REMF’s REMF. Joined the Seabees as an OCS officer because he couldn’t get a real job, and was too worried about his pussy civilian occupation to be a Marine. Served from ’76 to ’82, mainly in Indiana, with zero combat-zone, let alone combat, experience. Guess what, squid, the Marines don’t need/want you as a groupie.

Oh, and that resume says “drunkard/druggie” all over it. Leaves the military, gets a cushy federal civil service job, and suddenly, BOOM, he’s “president” of his “consulting and demolition” company, and then he’s a taxi driver and street corner evangelist. I’m guessing Scotch, cocaine and hookers led him to Jesus. And he probably stole a bunch of government building supplies, too.

snideinplainsight April 20, 2010 at 3:18 pm

This Websense category is filtered: Potentially Damaging Content.

OzoneTom April 20, 2010 at 3:19 pm

Because Bill Sali didn’t bring enough of teh crazy to beat that blue-dog Walt Minnick.

I’ll have to keep an eye out for his campaign yard signs so I can see where my nuttier neighbors reside.

SayItWithWookies April 20, 2010 at 3:20 pm

…because there aren’t enough fat white Republicans in Congress who think an aphorism is better than a thought-out policy. I can’t wait for these idiots to start writing laws that can be written on a postcard. In longhand.

TGY April 20, 2010 at 3:20 pm

Uncle Fester?

sezme April 20, 2010 at 3:20 pm

His website does have a question and comment form. Wonder what kind of responsible questions the Wonketerati would ask him…

Roger Williams hates your ways April 20, 2010 at 3:21 pm

[re=560450]canadasteve[/re]: I think you’re misunderstanding him. I think he is saying this guy is a closeted gay.

geminisunmars April 20, 2010 at 3:21 pm

[re=560419]Extemporanus[/re]: perfect

ArkansasFred April 20, 2010 at 3:21 pm
GOPCrusher April 20, 2010 at 3:22 pm

Looks like Juggernaut from the X-Men.
But you have to admit, its refreshing to see a politician come right out and let you know where they stand.
He’s nuts, but honest.

x111e7thst April 20, 2010 at 3:22 pm

[re=560435]Crank Tango[/re]: And at least one dildo

snideinplainsight April 20, 2010 at 3:22 pm

All babies look like Winston Churchill.

Dear Diorama April 20, 2010 at 3:22 pm

” It would be like Luke Skywalker dropping his bomb into the ventilation shaft of the Death Star in ‘Star Wars. “

Rich Tanguy April 20, 2010 at 3:22 pm

So, he want’s to “dump hot coals into the shorts” and “drop bombs in the ventilation shafts”?

This is screaming for a new definition on Urban Dictionary. The “Harley” – the best of both a Hot Carl and a Boston Pancake.

Truly, a “real” man, Harley D. Brown is.

nappyduggs April 20, 2010 at 3:24 pm

[re=560419]Extemporanus[/re]:

Is it possible to be equal parts Curly and Shemp? It seems he could be….

Also, do you Idahoans really want a man wearing a suit made out of old motel room chair upholstery covers to represent you?

You do? Carry on, then.

anonymousryan April 20, 2010 at 3:25 pm

[re=560453]Cranky Little Camperette[/re]: I know, I was really hoping for some racially insensitive animations.

magic titty April 20, 2010 at 3:25 pm

He is the phrase ‘looks like the best part of him ran down the crack of his mama’s ass and ended up as stain on the mattress’ personified.

trondant April 20, 2010 at 3:25 pm

[re=560429]norbizness[/re]: Let’s not start sucking each others’ dicks just….oh wait.

Never mind.

4tehlulz April 20, 2010 at 3:25 pm

[re=560432]JMP[/re]: “Yes, after reading what can charitably be called his thoughts, that Harley Brown, he’s a clown.”

Oddly enough, John Wayne Gacy was the first thing I thought of.

Sara in the West April 20, 2010 at 3:25 pm

[re=560451]whiterabid[/re]: So he thinks he’s Luke Skywalker? The obvious Jabba the Hutt joke is too easy here. On the upside, he’s got crazy eyes.

Gregoire April 20, 2010 at 3:27 pm

ELMER FUDD 2012!

weejee April 20, 2010 at 3:28 pm

[re=560467]sezme[/re]: Yes, since he talks so much about being a structural engineer (Sweet Baby Jeebus make that not true) we could ask where he is licensed – perhaps the great state of confusion?

Lazy Media April 20, 2010 at 3:29 pm

Dangit, the contact link is busted. Probably overloaded after the word got out about this nutjob.

whiterabid April 20, 2010 at 3:30 pm

[re=560465]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Would that be better than the stream of conscious proposed constitutional amendements here in Colorado? The latest proposals want to eliminate all taxes and gubmint spending. Roads? Where we’re going, we don’t need roads, nor no stinking badges either.

Dear Diorama April 20, 2010 at 3:31 pm

[re=560467]sezme[/re]: I tried and it said “www.harleydbrownforcongress.org.com was not found on our servers,” so…

Extemporanus April 20, 2010 at 3:31 pm

[re=560450]canadasteve[/re]: So Canadian!

JMP April 20, 2010 at 3:31 pm

[re=560446]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: It would be nice if this were a parody, but the .org makes me think he’s for real, and just plain nuts.

[re=560449]pub_option[/re]: But he does summarize it as “Adios amigos”. No, no racism there, not at all.

Also, you’ve got to like that his big promise is to outdo Joe Wilson in screaming douchebaggery in Congress. Will scream against debt and against all income taxes (slight contradiction there), and scream moronic birther bullshit at Obama. That’s just what we need, for the next State of the Union to be interrupted with “SHOW US YOUR BIRT CERTIFIKATE!!”

GOPCrusher April 20, 2010 at 3:32 pm

“Why has Obama Not produced a valid birth certificate providing he was born on American soil?

Because he can’t. If he faked it, he would be guilty of Federal felony Fraud. The first thing that I’d like to do when elected and on behalf of the ½ million American citizens of my district, I promise to scream like a F-4 Jet fighter at full war emergency after burner take off power and demand he produce his birth certificate. If that doesn’t work, I’ll make louder noises and get a lot more aggressive. In fact this is “DO OR DIE” They will have to kill me to get me to shut up.”

Don’t write checks your ass can’t cash.

Vartan84 April 20, 2010 at 3:32 pm

I sort of want him to win, in a nihilistic we’re-all-doomed-anyway so screw it sort of way.

Accordion-o-rama April 20, 2010 at 3:32 pm

Nuke their ass, take their gas

Is he talking about lighting farts? That might explain his facial expression.

I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO April 20, 2010 at 3:32 pm

[re=560415]sanantonerose[/re]: I second that. All things considered, I think there’s just a possibility that I would vote for him if I were in his district. Not only is he honest, I think it would be an education to see someone batshit crazier than Michele Bachman in Congress.

progressiveinga April 20, 2010 at 3:34 pm

I love the thought that has gone into Harley’s immigration policy: “Content Comming Soon; But for now its Adios Amigos”.
Brilliant!

YeWaat? April 20, 2010 at 3:35 pm

http://www.votesmart.org/bio.php?can_id=53104
oooh, he ran for prez in 2000

rptrcub April 20, 2010 at 3:36 pm

I have bad visions of that man sitting on a fist-shaped dildo.

JMP April 20, 2010 at 3:36 pm

[re=560453]Cranky Little Camperette[/re]: And you’d think he could illustrate the “cartoon” with something a little less hokey than the Hallmark lady.

[re=560498]Lazy Media[/re]: Guess we overloaded his server. Good grief.

Monsieur Grumpe April 20, 2010 at 3:36 pm

[re=560416]ManchuCandidate[/re]:
He’s an engineer. Ugh. I’m giving up defending the profession. How much does mime school cost?

Neo Atheist April 20, 2010 at 3:37 pm

He’s not nearly as impressive as George Hutchins though. http://www.georgehutchins.com/

“Now in 2010, these same Fence-Riders, FAKE Conservatives, and FAKE Republican RINOS are back in Full Force.” He’s going to go hunting for Republican Republican In Name Only’s.

slappypaddy April 20, 2010 at 3:37 pm

mr. potato-head come to life, and in idaho, no less, where he has been growing in the darkness and dirt. if idahoans want to have one less vote in the congress, this is the man for the job.

Extemporanus April 20, 2010 at 3:38 pm

[re=560481]nappyduggs[/re]: “Is it possible to be equal parts Curly and Shemp?”

Shurly it must be.

TakingAmes April 20, 2010 at 3:38 pm

So… much… to work with…
“This is because many US politicians are spineless jellyfish.” I hate to nit-pick (actually I don’t), but this guy knows jellyfish are invertebrates, right? Oh wait, today’s theme is redundancy, I forgot.
“Combat is NO place for women” Well, I don’t wanna go, but more power to ya if you do, I guess.
“I declare the US Tax code should be scuttled and declared unconstitutional on the legal grounds of being Void for Vagueness.” I’m reasonably sure that’s not a legal ground.

This guy seems the hate the gubmint a whole lot for someone who’s begging the Idaho 1st (Fightin’ 1st?) to let him suck off the gubmint’s teat for a while.

TakingAmes April 20, 2010 at 3:40 pm

And his website is really effing slow. Is that because of all the Wonketteers? Are we filling out his Online Contact Form? http://www.harleydbrownforcongress.org/contact.html

ivenson April 20, 2010 at 3:41 pm

That crazy white person looks like he could be Rob Corddry’s pedo uncle.

trondant April 20, 2010 at 3:41 pm

[re=560498]Lazy Media[/re]: [re=560501]Dear Diorama[/re]: I managed to get this submitted

Mr. Brown, if elected will you promise to do that trick where you put a lightbulb in your mouth and it lights up? Please say yes.

but I had to save the page to my desktop, knock the .com off the end of the .org in notepad, save it, then open the page and resubmit. Those of you with jerbs are probably too busy for that.

magic titty April 20, 2010 at 3:42 pm

[re=560450]canadasteve[/re]: Uhh, I don’t think he did that at all. But whatever.

I Heart Accuracy April 20, 2010 at 3:43 pm

I hope he takes up smoking weed and starts an army-navy surplus store. Or gets hit by a falling goat.

schvitzatura April 20, 2010 at 3:43 pm

[re=560442]Jerri[/re]: George Liquor, American

TouchMyMess April 20, 2010 at 3:44 pm

no flagpin.

Tim April 20, 2010 at 3:46 pm

How is it that engineering is so difficult yet seems to attract only psychopathic retards? I’ve never met an engineer that wasn’t like this guy.

Potater April 20, 2010 at 3:48 pm

[re=560513]YeWaat?[/re]:

Organizations:
Hell’s Angel.

I jizzed pure, unbridled mirth. This man is my spherical hero.

rmjag April 20, 2010 at 3:48 pm

[re=560431]Rich Tanguy[/re]: intake manifold is incorrect . exhaust pipe for bowels is correct…….

KTHXBAI April 20, 2010 at 3:48 pm

HARLEY BROWN: He Makes Vaughn Ward Look Like a San Francisco Welfare Queen

Manos: Hands of Fate April 20, 2010 at 3:49 pm

Great new book idea for Matthew Continetti: “Mashed Potatoes: The Story of the Liberal Elite’s Slander of Harley Brown”

rastignac April 20, 2010 at 3:49 pm

Imagine a ticket of Brown-Santorum: Just the name itself would be worth the laughs and would aptly describe both candidates.

I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO April 20, 2010 at 3:50 pm

Oh God:

“Keep the Queens out of the Marines.” And it sounds so GOOD on a bumper sticker too.

What the hell? Why do these uber militaristic jack offs all end up being so anti-government? Seriously, do any of these people grasp the concept of irony? I just…

Fuck, man, this country finally broke my damn brain.

Cape Clod April 20, 2010 at 3:50 pm

[re=560428]mocowbell[/re]: And Michelle Bachmann would be a solid Vampira.

rachelv April 20, 2010 at 3:50 pm

I must say, the Maxine cartoon was unexpected.

Not_So_Much April 20, 2010 at 3:51 pm

I just moved to Idaho and was blissfully unaware of this retarded pant-load.

Now I has a sad…

betweenstations April 20, 2010 at 3:53 pm

I think the Wonketteers have made his web server crash!

Potater April 20, 2010 at 3:53 pm

“www.harleydbrownforcongress.org.com was not found on our servers.”

KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHN

I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO April 20, 2010 at 3:55 pm

[re=560549]betweenstations[/re]: And for that we have provided a great service to the American people and deserve medals of freedom.

JMP April 20, 2010 at 3:56 pm

[re=560516]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: WAS an engineer; but managed to parley that into the much more lucrative field of truck driving. Then went down to cab driving.

[re=560521]TakingAmes[/re]: He claims the tax code should be void for vagueness right after complaining that it’s too long and complicated. So is this another self-contradiction, or does he not know what “vague” means?

sezme April 20, 2010 at 3:56 pm

[re=560546]rachelv[/re]: This is a wingnut trope, that “Maxine” said this thing. Maxine was created by artist John Wagner for Hallmark Cards. It’s highly unlikely that he or Hallmark ever wrote those words. It says a lot about the wingnut mindset that they rally behind a fictional quote by a fictional character which is owned by a very real large corporation.

melissa4033 April 20, 2010 at 3:56 pm

Harley Brown runs for everything. He’s even run for President a couple of times. Don’t worry. Idahoans send him packing every election. My dad was at a caucus meeting the other night and Harley Brown got up and starting raging about nuking D.C. A bunch of people walked out of the room, refusing to listen to his nonsense. He’s one of those lunatics who rages about the constitution but actually has never read it.

SayItWithWookies April 20, 2010 at 3:56 pm

[re=560500]whiterabid[/re]: Hmm…maybe this past recession was the fault of people who couldn’t balance their checkbooks. Then again, the amendment was probably proposed by one of the literate elites. Who got elected by the idiots who can’t balance their checkbooks.

Come here a minute April 20, 2010 at 3:58 pm

How did they get Marvel Comics to do their campaign art?

Mr Blifil April 20, 2010 at 3:58 pm

I fuckin’ lurve this guy.

Manos: Hands of Fate April 20, 2010 at 3:59 pm

Every time Wonkette posts the Web site of a nutty fringe candidate, book burning churches or frightening right-wing extremists, it crashes under the weight of snickering Wonketters long before I get a chance to look at it.

Canuck13652 April 20, 2010 at 4:00 pm

Also, the “Terrorists should be afraid of the US not the other way around” is really rich from a Republican or right winger. I mean, for how many years were we told that the Evil Super Terrorists were mere minutes away from blowing up the Mall of America and Taking Away our Freedomz and Fast Food Joints, so we had to give up all our rights and believe Dubya? Or get told that we couldn’t house terrorist suspects in max security US jails because they can all shoot Lasers from their Eyes and they can Leap Tall Buildings and Hide in the Shadows?

Also.

carlgt1 April 20, 2010 at 4:03 pm

And his real ruff & tuff Marine experience in kicking ass was in — being a civil engineer in the Construction Corps.

Potater April 20, 2010 at 4:03 pm

[re=560555]sezme[/re]: Isn’t the entire point of the “Maxine” series that she’s a jaded and bitter old christmas cake with no appealing qualities whatsoever but who occasionally pulls out a good zinger?

Wait, that sounds familiar….

OzoneTom April 20, 2010 at 4:05 pm

[re=560448]Mild Midwesterner[/re]: OT, I’ve often thought that someone needs to come up with a word that rhymes with “orange” just so we can avoid such dilemmas. Preferably one that could be used as either a noun or a verb.

Monsieur Grumpe April 20, 2010 at 4:06 pm

[re=560561]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]:
His Commodore 64 just couldn’t keep up.

[re=560554]JMP[/re]:
Well, you must admire his, ummm, ah, never mind.

McDuff April 20, 2010 at 4:08 pm

“I considered myself the ‘intake manifold to the Kingdom of God’” …

… and God is choking on the exhaust fumes.

arewethereyet April 20, 2010 at 4:09 pm

[re=560485]magic titty[/re]: The way i way i heard it was ” the best part of him ran down his daddys’ leg” but titty, i think we’re walkin’ down the same road.

thehelveticascenario April 20, 2010 at 4:10 pm

Ha, what an idiot! It was the exhaust port on the death star, not a ventilation shaft. And he calls himself an engineer.

weejee April 20, 2010 at 4:10 pm

[re=560535]Tim[/re]: [re=560516]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: I checked in both Indiana (where he said he was first licensed) and Idaho, and he’s not currently licensed in either state.

[re=560554]JMP[/re]: see above, I wonder if he ever was licensed or if he gradiated from UCONN in civil engineering. Why civil? This twatwaffle is anything but!

[re=560535]Tim[/re]: BTW, some of your fellow Wonketteers are one.

I Heart Accuracy April 20, 2010 at 4:12 pm

Morange: A moran, with mange.

upstateNY April 20, 2010 at 4:13 pm

So… no more income tax. How does this fucking retard expect to pay for his HUGE NUCLEAR ARSENAL to blow up the brown people without a defense budget. Maybe we’ll all joining the navy bees or whatever the fuck and work for free? Aw hell no, that would be jus’ like communism.

snideinplainsight April 20, 2010 at 4:13 pm

Congress Trap – starring Harley Brown … and Harley Brown!

It’s a LOOK-ALIKE, RING-A-DING, LAFF-AFFAIR!

What these two look-a-likes do to a Congress is sheer DELIRIUM… What they do to the internet is sheer DELIGHT!

McDuff April 20, 2010 at 4:14 pm

[re=560488]4tehlulz[/re]: I second that “he’s gotta be a child-molesting birthday party clown” as a first impression of ol’ baldy.

Katydid April 20, 2010 at 4:14 pm

[re=560450]canadasteve[/re]: I don’t think Larry was doing that either…but in any case, whenever someone uses “gay” in that way, I look at them as if I don’t understand and say, “it’s homosexual?” It always stops ‘em dead because they get really confused. For people with any intelligence, the point is made. For people without, nothing was gonna help anyway.

Pandy April 20, 2010 at 4:14 pm

[re=560577]weejee[/re]: Yes some of us are also engineers too also.

arewethereyet April 20, 2010 at 4:14 pm

You might want to check under uncivil engineer

Jerri April 20, 2010 at 4:15 pm

[re=560531]schvitzatura[/re]: Yes! That’s the one! Thanks for finding that.

Aquannissiwamissoo April 20, 2010 at 4:15 pm

I really don’t want to know what Harley intends to do with their “gas.”

carlgt1 April 20, 2010 at 4:17 pm

[re=560576]thehelveticascenario[/re]:
ah if only more Republicans would use space for “ventilation”…..

plus why use a “Star Wars” metaphor, isn’t George Lucas et al basically Hollywood liberals? It’s like this pseudo-jarhead militaristic goon wouldn’t be a Stormtrooper kissing Darth Vader’s ass?

chascates April 20, 2010 at 4:17 pm

And under ‘immigration policy’ he has:

Content Comming Soon

But for now its Adios Amigos

snideinplainsight April 20, 2010 at 4:17 pm

[re=560577]weejee[/re]: Yeah, there’s plenty of engineering around here, actually.

Please don’t besmirch my memories of C64 glory BTW -

Katydid April 20, 2010 at 4:20 pm

[re=560556]melissa4033[/re]: Harley Brown got up and starting raging about nuking D.C.

Was he for or against?

ZombieRichardFeynman April 20, 2010 at 4:20 pm

I’m not buying that this is for real. But it’s a great sendup of the wingnut’s wingnut. Of course I would say that about Glen Becky and Sarah Palin too if I just saw them for the first time.

gertrudis April 20, 2010 at 4:20 pm

[re=560547]Not_So_Much[/re]: Just look for nice normal people like [re=560556]melissa4033[/re]: and ignore the sneers from [re=560440]canadasteve[/re]:, and you’ll be fine.

Harley claims to have worked for the War Department in the 1980′s, but there hasn’t been a War Department in the US since 1947. Did he invent his whole resume? Never read his pay stub? Is he perhaps Lord Voldemort? Harley Brown, show us your birth certificate!

JMP April 20, 2010 at 4:21 pm

[re=560555]sezme[/re]: Huh. I recognized the old lady from the dumb Hallmark cards, but didn’t realize that anyone would enjoy them, much less make a trope of ripping them off.

MattP April 20, 2010 at 4:22 pm

Is it wrong that I’m impressed that he knows the difference between there/their/they’re?

Granted, it should read, “Nuke Their Asses,” but I’ll sacrifice grammar in the name of a catchy rhyme!

Snarkalicious April 20, 2010 at 4:25 pm

[re=560442]Jerri[/re]: mmmmmmEAT!

Not to mention my NAMBLA detector is going fucking mad. I’m glad I don’t have kids, because with a dude walking arond smiling like that, every time he picked up a piece of candy, I’d sympathetically puke.

Fuck it: Pope Harley it is!

mercure April 20, 2010 at 4:29 pm

[re=560556]melissa4033[/re]: I don’t believe that this guy is for real, everything on the site from the font to the photo is just too over-the-top. Clearly, you’re in on the whole scam. Well-done, by the way…

Smoke Filled Roommate April 20, 2010 at 4:30 pm

[re=560435]Crank Tango[/re]: He probably has a ball gag in his man purse.

El Pinche April 20, 2010 at 4:32 pm

The prison talk for assfucking and spewing your wad on hairy man-ass.

BTW, the guy look like human lard.

betterDeadThanRed April 20, 2010 at 4:32 pm

If this man has anyone in his life who truly cares for him they should get him on the proper medication.

Also he worked for the “War Department”? It hasn’t been called the War Department since 1947 which was before he was born. I’m sure in his mind Department of Defense needs moar war..

ForTheTurnstiles April 20, 2010 at 4:33 pm

[re=560612]mercure[/re]: I’ve lived in the first district of Idaho. This guy is probably legit. He’s running against a republican in democrat clothes, one Walt Minnick. And he might fuckin win.

crapshooter102 April 20, 2010 at 4:38 pm

Harley has to be a newby RINO. He doesn’t remember the Laffer Curve during the Reagan Administration. They claimed the debt didn’t matter, keep spending. Remember that! What happened to Harley, he couldn’t make it in the USMC, so he went to work for the Guv’ment, retired and now some must have stolen his Pink Bicycle.

Red Zeppelin April 20, 2010 at 4:45 pm

He looks about ready to stroke out at any minute. Won’t have time to get much seniority on the hill. BTW he’d make a great Daddy Warbucks in the Twin Falls Community Theatre production of Annie.

Traveler April 20, 2010 at 4:47 pm

[re=560520]Extemporanus[/re]: I think it is equal parts in the sense that you took both of them and mashed them together. Is anywhere crazy enough for this guy? (A rhetorical question, I think)

Katydid April 20, 2010 at 4:54 pm

What I got from his Maxine-inspired homily was, stop feeding bird food to the Messicans and other illegals because he’s tired of them pooping on his head, and it’s too hard to figure out how to use the Corn Flakes because they come in a “Bilingual box,” which I would like to see, btw.

Did I miss anything?

wilbro April 20, 2010 at 4:55 pm

Uhhh, Sarah Palin was the valedictorian of Idaho once, wasn’t she?

Wonder if she mashed potatoes with this nuke expert.

queeraselvis v 2.0 April 20, 2010 at 4:57 pm

Harley D. Brown: putting the “anal” in analogy since 1954.

Dave J. April 20, 2010 at 4:58 pm

Something tells me this guy spends most of his free time obsessively watching and re-watching the volleyball scene from “Top Gun.”

marioninnyc April 20, 2010 at 5:01 pm

Palin/Brown 2012.

PlanetWingnuta April 20, 2010 at 5:02 pm

No wonder larry craig didnt want to give up his congressional seat…i too would be scared to have sex with anyone from Idaho!

fromhils April 20, 2010 at 5:08 pm

[re=560449]pub_option[/re]: This was my favorite part especially spelled comming soon as it is.

I am pretty sure the second line “But For Now Adios Amigos” pretty well encapsulate his entire immigration policy.

OldGrowthSwamp April 20, 2010 at 5:13 pm

His site just went down.

weejee April 20, 2010 at 5:15 pm

[re=560585]Pandy[/re]:
needs moar fizzuks puns

[re=560593]snideinplainsight[/re]:
No prob on the C64, as long as you don’t dis the HP87 we used in the field while inspecting bridges. That suckah had 128K of RAM.

weejee April 20, 2010 at 5:18 pm

[re=560677]OldGrowthSwamp[/re]: Maybe someone gave him a DoS.

JMP April 20, 2010 at 5:24 pm

[re=560581]upstateNY[/re]: And he plans to eliminate the deficit, all at the same time.

[re=560598]gertrudis[/re]: [re=560624]betterDeadThanRed[/re]: It’s funny, I’ve heard some antiwar liberals suggest rerenaming the Defense Department back to War, but never anyone who wanted more war. This guy just really wants to blow brown people up.

Marimba65 April 20, 2010 at 5:24 pm

Does the right honorable Mr. Brown discuss his multiple bankruptcy filings on his website? Or the fact that he left supporters unpaid from his last campaign?

notreallyhelping April 20, 2010 at 5:28 pm

Bet the guy gets a seat to himself on the bus.

Tundra Grifter April 20, 2010 at 5:37 pm

From his website: “This country got along just fine from 1776 to 1918 without the scourge of income tax.”

The first income tax was introduced to pay for the Civil War. Guess he was against that, too. The North winning, I mean.

You betcha!

Mad Farmer Manifest April 20, 2010 at 5:37 pm

Yay! I’m a vile domestic threat to the USA!

Incidentally, I’m from Idaho, and I’d like to take this opportunity to say: In your face, libtards from elsewhere! No one brings the motherfucking right-wing crazy like Idaho!

melissa4033 April 20, 2010 at 5:40 pm

[re=560596]Katydid[/re]: for.

FlaminYawn April 20, 2010 at 5:45 pm

The Seabees are bold engineers
They live in caves and ditches
They bang their cocks against the rocks
Those hardy sons of bitches.

Tim April 20, 2010 at 5:48 pm

[re=560450]canadasteve[/re]: You and I both. It happens here a lot, considering the audience.

PhineusJWhoopee April 20, 2010 at 5:52 pm

Arthur Carlson, is that you?

maven April 20, 2010 at 5:56 pm

[re=560450]canadasteve[/re]: Both of those terms have been used in that way for generations…

doxastic April 20, 2010 at 5:56 pm

That is the face of a man who loves radioactive Dutch ovens.

Numbat Dundee April 20, 2010 at 5:57 pm

So he wants to use nuclear weapons to steal farts. That’s it isn’t it?

doxastic April 20, 2010 at 6:00 pm

[re=560452]Oldskool[/re]: Sounds like a man qualified to finish what the flight 93 hijackers started.

Bearbloke April 20, 2010 at 6:00 pm

[re=560531]schvitzatura[/re]: That’s George Liquor, American – Star of the Goddamn George Liquor Programme!

virgo47 April 20, 2010 at 6:00 pm

Yuk it up people, Jimbo Traficant (whom I have voted for several times) is going to return to the House in November. You heard it here first.
http://www.jim-traficant.com/

virgo47 April 20, 2010 at 6:02 pm

http://www.jim-traficant.com/
Heeeee’s Baaaaaack.

virgo47 April 20, 2010 at 6:08 pm

[re=560766]virgo47[/re]: sorry for the double post. Be sure to read some 1-minute speeches for some scary-type LOLZ.

azw88 April 20, 2010 at 6:08 pm

“they will have to kill me to get me to shut up”

OK, but remember, since you ASKED for it, it aint murder, it’s suicide by proxy!

hoosiermama April 20, 2010 at 6:09 pm

FBI investigation of Harley’s backyard and shed in 3, 2, 1…

american mutt April 20, 2010 at 6:10 pm

This guy needs a tv show.

Lazy Media April 20, 2010 at 6:12 pm

[re=560546]rachelv[/re]: I have four birdfeeders up, and the only downside is that the welfare squirrels eat most of the food. But the birds are lovely. No additional poop, no nests in weird places, just some spilled seed and sunflower shells, and lots of pretty sights and sounds. Maxine sounds like a hateful bitch with a cleanliness fetish.

Bearbloke April 20, 2010 at 6:24 pm

[re=560608]Snarkalicious[/re]: He’s Catholic, but divorced and probably estranged from his children and barred from being alone with any minor… HAIL POPE HARLEY!!!

aflurry April 20, 2010 at 6:26 pm

This guy needs a public ass-kicking by a gay dude.

J.Robert Oppenheiner April 20, 2010 at 6:29 pm

If you look at your store, the only Kellogg’s Corn Flakes that come in a bilingual box are the Corn Flakes with a touch of Honey variety. And that is in English and French.

S.Luggo April 20, 2010 at 6:34 pm

Harley will bomb you with his big head.

Tommmcatt April 20, 2010 at 6:51 pm

[re=560450]canadasteve[/re]:

Right? THANK YOU!

Words April 20, 2010 at 7:07 pm

[re=560730]Tundra Grifter[/re]: He was educated in the fine public schools of Idaho, probably.

Abou Diaby April 20, 2010 at 7:10 pm

If I were Al Qaeda I’d hate us for this too.

JMP April 20, 2010 at 7:34 pm

[re=560797]aflurry[/re]: A half-Latina / half-Arab Muslim lesbian IRS agent.

justthisonce April 20, 2010 at 7:37 pm

As a former Seabee, I am so ashamed…

JimmysDad April 20, 2010 at 7:46 pm

http://www.votesmart.org/bio.php?can_id=53104

He’s a Hells Angel, also.
I think this is a Tosh.0 sketch played out in real time. Nobody this inbred could spell ‘coming’ as almost accurately as he did…

natoslug April 20, 2010 at 7:46 pm

[re=560861]justthisonce[/re]: As a soon-to-be-former Idahoan, I am so ashamed…

rocktonsammy April 20, 2010 at 7:49 pm

Get them showers curtins on in the congressional locker room pronto!

Tim April 20, 2010 at 7:58 pm

[re=560577]weejee[/re]: Perhaps it’s a southern thing. My dad was an engineer, so was my uncle and they’re both (a little) like this guy. My dad was exactly like this guy when he was around 40. My former neighbor was an engineer and a total neocon republitard. I did have one good friend in college who is an engineer, but he is one of the weird ones that reads and likes art.

Old Redneck April 20, 2010 at 8:13 pm

I spent a few minutes reading his website and I nearly pee’ed on myself laughing!!! I’d vote for Harley just to watch him on C-SPAN!!! I can see it now: Bachmann-Brown 2012!!!!

Bearbloke April 20, 2010 at 8:19 pm

[re=560878]Old Redneck[/re]: Could this be one of his earlier writings?…

Johnny Zhivago April 20, 2010 at 9:01 pm

Harley, Hell’s Angels… this has to be a joke.

Capitol Hillbilly April 20, 2010 at 9:24 pm

Some Republican is certain to win this seat – this guy is the best we can hope for.

Scarab April 20, 2010 at 9:30 pm

‘You’re good man Harley Brown’

Marimba65 April 20, 2010 at 9:55 pm

Besides, Idaho already had a cartoon villain in Congress. Bill ( shudder ) Sali.

pants of doom April 20, 2010 at 11:17 pm

GAR. Why is a thumb wearing a tie?

Hayduke April 20, 2010 at 11:24 pm

[re=560448]Mild Midwesterner[/re]:
Nuke their orange
Take their door hinge…

/Vonnegut

DoktorZoom April 20, 2010 at 11:26 pm

[re=560555]sezme[/re]: Sent to Hallmark’s “Contact Us” page:

You may already be aware of this, but the John Wagner’s Hallmark-trademarked character “Maxine” has been attached to a stereotype-filled anti-immigration rant that’s been forwarded around email for a few years [example deleted]; while I don’t for a moment think this is anything other than an unauthorized use of the character, I can imagine that Hallmark is probably none too thrilled to see one of its products associated with some fairly ugly ideas. No idea what, if anything, Hallmark can do about the emails, but a DMCA takedown request seems appropriate for the webpages that are making unauthorized use of your character.

Most recently, the message has been incorporated into the campaign website of Harley D Brown, a fringe candidate for Congress from Idaho, at http://www.harleydbrownforcongress.org/cartoons.html. I hope you are able to do something to remove the taint that this anti-Latino message has given to “Maxine.”

(yes, the “taint” part was a shout-out to Wonkette)

Pete-O April 20, 2010 at 11:46 pm

It’s a gritty follow-up to Mr. Smith goes to Washington:

Mr. Smith II – The ‘Tard who’s Fatter with the Tar and Feathers

bluevelvetelvis April 21, 2010 at 12:22 am

This can’t be real

Look at the title of this picture “extreme shit ive done 20008_sm.jpg”
http://www.harleydbrownforcongress.org/filez/extreme%20shit%20ive%20done%20008_sm.jpg

Check out the his right/your left chest panel on this suit. It’s like a psychedelic fantasy. I wish I had a suit like that.

mikej April 21, 2010 at 12:24 am

Oh God…this is my district.

Rajul April 21, 2010 at 12:32 am

[re=560889]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: This guy is hilarious. I just can’t figure out whether he’s tring to see how many wingtards are gonna line up to vote for him or how many libtards are gonna go apeshit over him.

One Flew Over the Wingnut April 21, 2010 at 1:28 am

You know, during periods of my teenage years I actually lived in Boise…this guy is par for the course. In fact, until I moved out to my current home in the peoples republic of Oregon in loving libtard lala land I’ve spent my entire life in either Idaho or Utah. Yes, Napoleon Dynamite isn’t that peculiar in those areas, and when Napoleon grows up, he becomes this guy. I perused the site just a bit…omg, he’s typical of the wingnuts in Utah. I remember during gulf war I a little ditty about Saddam Hussein being a camel-fucker was popular in Utah. So seeing his slogan of “nuke ‘em and take ther gas!”, I think of a particular type of Utahn/Idahoan (same difference really), the school-bus home-living, gun toting, NRA flag waving with racist bumpersticker and white power tatoos, and dildo shaped like Joseph Smith’s tiny penis owning potato-fucker. I swear to god, when I saw Larry Craig’s super tuber I about died laughing, it’s like every joke I ever made about those idiots come to life! Thank jebus for that very gay closeted anus-juice sucking Republican recipe….aww, good times, I love you Wonkette!

ez April 21, 2010 at 1:41 am

So Uncle Fester graduates in 1974 an spends the summer of 1976 looking for a job. Where the fuck was he hiding for two years?

lib tard April 21, 2010 at 2:10 am

I love how his passion is eradicating the deficit while at the same time he wants to do away with the income tax and carry on a nuclear war. On top of everything else, it raises a few pink flags that he’s a never married bible-humping homophobic war-mongering “real man”. 10 to 1 odds this guy loves cock.

Smoke Filled Roommate April 21, 2010 at 3:28 am

[re=560444]Jumping Jim[/re]: Yeah, his given name was actually Marquis DeAndre Brown so to be on the safe side, he changed it right quick.

Hello Sunshine April 21, 2010 at 4:11 am

On his birther page he describes the result of Obama being proved to have been born overseas as being “like Luke Skywalker dropping his bomb into the ventilation shaft of the Death Star in Star Wars”.

Well-rooted in reality, then.

Also, has anyone ever explained the link between the Government “having very expensive nuclear weapons” and “collecting taxes”?

Barrelhse April 21, 2010 at 8:20 am

[re=560942]lib tard[/re]: Not to mention his rather uncanny resemblance to J.Edgar Hoover.

libwakman April 21, 2010 at 8:41 am

The SuperDuper Democrat with the exploding noggin featured to Harley’s left will no doubt throw his support behind him just because he believes he is the best man for America. They will be bus-touring the state on the Douchebag Express.

Sussemilch April 21, 2010 at 9:04 am

Ah, I always wondered what Butterbean’s real name was.

zhubajie April 21, 2010 at 10:11 am

That photo looks as if he already has the super-tuber up his butt!

zhubajie April 21, 2010 at 10:16 am

[re=560423]Sharkey[/re]: Not a Mormon or a Identity Xtn? He’s SOL.

Libbygirl April 21, 2010 at 12:15 pm

UGH He’s originally from CT (‘Brass City’ AKA ‘Ass City’). My heart weeps. And naturally, he’s from the valley. Anyone who thinks we are a state of wall-to-wall Richie Rich characters (which is flat out wrong to begin with) should visit that area and points East. Let’s just say that South Carolina hasn’t cornered the market on two-toothed Neanderthals.

Thankfully, we spit this turd out West. Now if we could only do that with clovenhoof Lieberman.

RonPaulKersey April 21, 2010 at 12:31 pm

[re=560933]One Flew Over the Wingnut[/re]: Yeahhhh. I don’t know about that. See, I actually spent my first 19 years in the Treasure Valley. I remember Harley’s various attempts at running for whatever office he’s discovered he could run for, and he’s not par for anything. The guy was too crazy for Helen “Black HE-licopters” Chenoweth.

bbqboy April 21, 2010 at 12:59 pm

God. If Helen wouldn’t do him……

zhubajie April 21, 2010 at 5:24 pm

[re=560432]JMP[/re]: Was he captain of the head at some point in his naval career?

zhubajie April 21, 2010 at 5:49 pm

[re=560535]Tim[/re]: Well, for most of the last 200 some years, the US has imported it’s engineers. Tesla, eg.

zhubajie April 21, 2010 at 5:55 pm

I have a suspicion that many Congressmen are like Jubilation T. Cornpone, elected to make them leave town.[re=560547]Not_So_Much[/re]:

Why? I spent a week there once and that was enough for a lifetime!

Norm A. Desmond April 21, 2010 at 7:53 pm

Obviously a candidate who will charm the ladies. Do you suppose it will turn out that he has a past life as a centerfold model, like his cousin Scott?

zhubajie April 21, 2010 at 8:12 pm

Are we sure he’s a real man? Looks like a eunuch to me! Are congressional candidates inspected the way papal candidates are?[re=560460]Lazy Media[/re]:

zhubajie April 22, 2010 at 1:21 am

[re=560446]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: He wouldn’t be the first person elected to Congress to make him leave town.

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