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  • Thumbs Up in Spanish is 'Oh dang we are all being killed by Drug Lords/Soldiers.'Famous organic farmer Michelle Obama is off to Mexico all by herself for an Official White House Journey! What will she do “south of the border,” and doesn’t she know it’s totally unsafe these days for Americans to party Mexican-style? Well, it turns out that Michelle is following many recent first ladies in their attempts to go someplace and say something and not be upstaged by their big-shot husbands. Mrs. President Obama will speak to “young people” in Mexico City about their “various problems.” [Washington Post]
  • World leaders at the Nuclear Weapons Summit in Washington were told that everyone will soon die when the Terrorists start nuking everybody. Prepare to give twenty blowjobs before you’re allowed on any plane ever again, for security reasons. [BBC News]
  • Henry Kissinger “canceled a warning against carrying out international political assassinations just days before a former Chilean ambassador was killed in Washington, according to a newly released State Department cable.” [Telegraph]
  • Robert Gibbs thinks White House reporters are idiots and he can’t wait to finally get a Policy Job and not have to stand there answering jackass questions from jackasses. Would you like to read a couple of thousand words about this? [Washington Post]
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