OP-ART WITH LAURI APPLE  11:51 am April 8, 2010

Tom Coburn Is Just a Sad Lesbian Cat Lady Now

by Ken Layne

Typical communist/PETA fanatic.Poor old Tom Coburn was a wingnut proto-teabagger Republican Hero until the other day, when he went INSANE and told a crowd of morons they should maybe not be so hateful and personal about politics, when reasonable people can disagree, etc., and Nancy Pelosi is actually a “nice lady.” Wonkette op-art contributor Lauri Apple takes Coburn’s transformation to its only logical conclusion, and you must see it.

This should be Tom Coburn's official portrait.
See more of Lauri Apple’s art at her Trend Pieces website or right here at Wonkette.

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Hola wonkerados.

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SayItWithWookies April 8, 2010 at 11:55 am

That’s just wrong. Those poor cats.

Troubledog April 8, 2010 at 11:56 am

On the wall, is that a dreamcatcher or a thigh harness?

Snarko Marx April 8, 2010 at 11:57 am

No Subaru Forester in the picture? S/he must be a hetero cat lady.

facehead April 8, 2010 at 11:58 am

That is so disturbing, I might just have to get back to work.

Nice tits.

Hamster April 8, 2010 at 11:58 am

Bitchin’ …is that a circa 1970′s macrame owl?

BlueStateLiberal April 8, 2010 at 12:00 pm

Oh, look at those sweet sensitive eyes! And his complexion is so smooth and clear! Way to go, Tom!

JMP April 8, 2010 at 12:05 pm

Wouldn’t a lesbian have dogs, not cats?

Coburn’s biggest crime, beyond even calling Pelosi nice, was telling the crowd to get their news from sources other than Fox. He’s dead to them now.

Crank Tango April 8, 2010 at 12:06 pm

today, we are all lesbian cat ladies. Truth be told, I wasn’t that far off anyway. Except for the dick having.

queeraselvis v 2.0 April 8, 2010 at 12:07 pm

[re=551399]Troubledog[/re]: The answer is “both,” obvs.

Scruffy_The_Janitor April 8, 2010 at 12:07 pm

That’s a man baby!!!!!!!

Radiotherapy April 8, 2010 at 12:09 pm

I get it! There is no FLAT screen.

queeraselvis v 2.0 April 8, 2010 at 12:09 pm

Y’know, with the right hat, Tom could totally pass for Bella Abzug.

Capitol Hillbilly April 8, 2010 at 12:11 pm

[re=551402]Hamster[/re]: I think it’s a dildo cozy.

freakishlystrong April 8, 2010 at 12:14 pm

Lauri is awesome; she even captured that contemplative look he gets while he’s blocking unemployment extensions. Kudos.

x111e7thst April 8, 2010 at 12:15 pm

Tommi Coburn was a nigger.
Jesus Christ and Grandma, too

Lazy Media April 8, 2010 at 12:16 pm

Needs moar cheezburgers.

Brendan M. April 8, 2010 at 12:17 pm

The problem with painting such a lovely and flattering portrait is that by the time the paint has dried Coburn proved that he is most assuredly a sociopathic asshole, momentary decency and sanity notwithstanding.

Radiotherapy April 8, 2010 at 12:17 pm

Wait, the lesbian cat lady is a family practice doctor who specializes in Ob-Gyn and has had cancer, reportidly, twice. Even though there is nothing funny about cancer, that would explain the mastectomy appearance of the left chest.

An Outhouse April 8, 2010 at 12:19 pm

He could share a place with the other lesbian cat lady, Joe Lieberman.

geminisunmars April 8, 2010 at 12:20 pm

But is that a key around his/her neck? What’s that for? The Forester?

Lauri Apple April 8, 2010 at 12:22 pm

[re=551402]Hamster[/re]: Indeed it is.

Lauri Apple April 8, 2010 at 12:23 pm

[re=551439]geminisunmars[/re]: Oh, that’s an Oklahoma commemorative necklace. It says “OK.”

Red Zeppelin April 8, 2010 at 12:24 pm

Needs moar plaid.

Hamster April 8, 2010 at 12:26 pm

[re=551428]Capitol Hillbilly[/re]: I get the feeling everything in that room is a dildo cozy, including the cats.

Naked Bunny with a Whip April 8, 2010 at 12:28 pm

I hope Fleshbot posts pics of the lesbian cats.

Mr Blifil April 8, 2010 at 12:32 pm

Could use a Hopi Dream Catcher mayhap…

germansteel April 8, 2010 at 12:35 pm

Needz moar bible. Tom’s a deacon, counsellor to horny C Street Republicans everywhere. And, bribe bag lady, to boot.

hoosiermama April 8, 2010 at 12:36 pm

[re=551459]Mr Blifil[/re]: That needs to be a macrame owl wall hanging, plz.

Whiskeybaby April 8, 2010 at 12:41 pm

television cat frightens me.

Mr Blifil April 8, 2010 at 12:44 pm

[re=551459]Mr Blifil[/re]: Try this one Mr. Lickspittle Smarty Poop-in-your-own-pants…


TGY April 8, 2010 at 12:47 pm

Hello Kitty?

Aquannissiwamissoo April 8, 2010 at 12:50 pm

Andrea Dworkin also got me hot …

One Yield Regular April 8, 2010 at 12:51 pm

I’ve said it before. I’ll say it again, Wonkette. Enough with the faux-iPod awards for caption & blingee contests. Can we haz Lauri Apple painting?

What Fresh Hell is This? April 8, 2010 at 12:51 pm

So, you ask, what does Tom Coburn say on this contagious subject? Let’s turn back the clock to October 12, 2004.

“Lesbianism is so rampant in some of the schools in southeast Oklahoma that they’ll only let one girl go to the bathroom. Now think about it. Think about that issue. How is it that that’s happened to us?”

BOOBIES! April 8, 2010 at 12:54 pm

I’d hit that. The guy, or the woman, but not that cats. Won’t have nothing to do with the cats.

weejee April 8, 2010 at 12:57 pm

Since Tommie is up for re-election, if he losses will he become a bag lady?

Aurelio April 8, 2010 at 12:58 pm

[re=551412]JMP[/re]: Wouldn’t a lesbian have dogs, not cats?
Dogs are out, ever since that unpleasantness with the Presa Canarios in San Francisco.

snideinplainsight April 8, 2010 at 12:59 pm

[re=551481]What Fresh Hell is This?[/re]: Geez! How do I find thes “southeast Oregon” place? Sounds cool to me!

Aurelio April 8, 2010 at 1:01 pm

[re=551486]snideinplainsight[/re]: It’s southeast Oklahoma, and you don’t wanna go there, not even for the hot lesbian action.

user-of-owls April 8, 2010 at 1:02 pm

This, my friends, is agit-prop at its finest.

Advocatus_Diaboli April 8, 2010 at 1:03 pm

[re=551481]What Fresh Hell is This?[/re]: I can haz fap fap thoughts?

user-of-owls April 8, 2010 at 1:03 pm

[re=551486]snideinplainsight[/re]: Alas, it’s “southeast Oklahoma” you’re pining for…and I can tell you from experience that it is somewhat different than “southeast Oregon”…rampant lesbianism notwithstanding.

Aquannissiwamissoo April 8, 2010 at 1:04 pm

My secret Barbara Bain fetish is now complete.

Larry McAwful April 8, 2010 at 1:09 pm

Any cat lover has my vote.

weejee April 8, 2010 at 1:19 pm

[re=551488]Aurelio[/re]: [re=551486]snideinplainsight[/re]: Yes, the real action is just across the border in De Queen, Arkansas.

Speed Ball April 8, 2010 at 1:26 pm

[re=551431]freakishlystrong[/re]: The cat by his right arm has same look on its face. Wrinkle on brow, thoughtful.

GOPCrusher April 8, 2010 at 1:26 pm

Even the cats seem to be suffering from soul-crushing depression.

comicbookguy April 8, 2010 at 1:30 pm

Tom Coburn is a nice lady.

inedalo April 8, 2010 at 1:33 pm

maybe coburn wants to run for Prez? he’s a doctor, ain’t he? and could perform lots of abortions in the White House.
remember, you catholics out there- if men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.

Speed Ball April 8, 2010 at 1:33 pm

When Calico dies, Tom immediately replaces with identical Calico, and gives it the same name. This is how he keeps going.

DemmeFatale April 8, 2010 at 1:50 pm

DustBowl, where are you?

Aurelio April 8, 2010 at 1:58 pm

Tom Coburn…told a crowd of morons they should maybe not be so hateful and personal about politics.

What’s this? Tom looks like a bull dyke, but inside he’s really a femme? What kind of sexual orientation is THAT? I haz a confused.

Accordion-o-rama April 8, 2010 at 2:00 pm

[re=551481]What Fresh Hell is This?[/re]: To be fair, that comment was just before the 2004 elections when the GOP theme was “Gays will kill us all”. Here’s a time line:

2000: Blow jobs will kill us all

2002: Iraqis will kill us all

2004: Gays will kill us all

2006: Peaceniks will kill us all

2008: The negro will kill us all

2010: Socialists will kill us all

Aurelio April 8, 2010 at 2:03 pm

[re=551559]Accordion-o-rama[/re]: Okay, here’s your straight line: What will the theme be in 2011?

DustBowlBlues April 8, 2010 at 2:06 pm

[re=551481]What Fresh Hell is This?[/re]: Yay. You got it in. Remembered when it happened. “8 ft. Lesbian Attacks Little Dixie.”

DustBowlBlues April 8, 2010 at 2:08 pm

When he had the momentary lapse into semi-decency, I told you guys not to take it seriously. Wasn’t he attacking Rachel Maddow last night? So even mavericky Tom has to suck the Faux News dick.

ella April 8, 2010 at 2:10 pm

He looks like every gym teacher I ever had. Even the nuns.

the problem child April 8, 2010 at 2:42 pm

[re=551428]Capitol Hillbilly[/re]: [i] Empty [/i] dildo cozy.

Beanball April 8, 2010 at 3:46 pm

[re=551620]the problem child[/re]: Don’t use the bracket “[" thingie, use the sideways carat "<" thingie. (Drop the quote marks, obvs.)

[i] = [i]


HTML magic!

Beanball April 8, 2010 at 3:51 pm

[re=551684]Beanball[/re]: Whoa!

i = i


sanantonerose April 8, 2010 at 5:43 pm

Lauri, you really have a way of capturing the eyes.

Mostly_Harmless April 8, 2010 at 5:44 pm

I heart this illustration.

jagorev April 8, 2010 at 5:56 pm

This was amazing

heathenish April 8, 2010 at 8:38 pm

[re=551482]BOOBIES![/re]: Is there ANYthing on the planet you WOULDN’T hit? I probably don’t want to know what that might be, though.

Jukesgrrl April 8, 2010 at 11:20 pm

I was anticipating a Coburn smackdown from Rachel Maddow tonight, but Lauri beat her to it.

Darkness April 9, 2010 at 2:56 am

[re=551562]Aurelio[/re]: [re=551559]Accordion-o-rama[/re]: Hm. . .

2012 Lawyers will kill us all

2012 Taxes will kill us all (This seems most likely. Kicking the financial can down the road is a republican speciality)

2012 Aliens will kill us all (green or mexican, or mexican with a salsa verde, if you prefer)

Other than the repubs know damn well who is buttering their bread, i’d say 2012 the Chinese bankers will kill us all

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