Tim Pawlenty, the Minnesota governor who wants to be president but is incapable of making anyone care about him, ever, was so jealous of Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann’s CURRENT & ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT NOW death rally that he stone cold invited himself and fuckin’ bought the website BachmannRally.com, putting his own stupid logo over it. Doesn’t he realize that he lacks a vagina?
You can watch the live stream of this *through* Tim Pawlenty’s website, and it might surprise you to hear that personal information will be collected in return, for this nobody-mooch’s upcoming loss to both Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann in the 2012 presidential primary.
Best to just stay tuned to Wonkette for attendee reports (MASSIVE FUCKING JOURNALISM) and YouTubes and god knows what.
UPDATE: Fuck Wonkette and Tim Pawlenty; just go to the Star Tribune’s live stream!
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It’s like crazyier and crazierer.
That’s like three more slices of stupid than the USDA says is safe.
Nope, not looking at this thing, even if it didn’t mean giving Gov. Lostabridge contact info; too much crazy.
Meanwhile, the insanity seems to have infected Wonkette with a case of italicitis.
Double Down Sandwich!
Stoopidpaloosa Begins!
Yay?
“T-Paw”?
Doesn’t he realize that he lacks a vagina?
Wait, what? I’ve had several people here tell me he *is* a vagina.
Oh Jim, don’t you know that sandwiches are named for what’s on the inside? That begs the question: Who really is the bread in this situation? The American people need to know. I’ll put $5 on the Holy Ghost.
[re=550633]Ruhe[/re]: He’s hoping to be a rap star if the governor’s gig falls through.
“Lacks a vagina”?
Since when?
Mich is seriously rockin’ the real estate agent look there.
Hey Libtardonians. I still have 4 tickets to this “event”. Any takers?
Imagine a monster-truck rally combined with an Eddie Money performance combined with a nursing-home excursion hosted by poop-flinging monkeys, drizzled with a generous amount of American ignorance/flags, and then mispelled, somehow.
This is that times eleventy-million.
If he lacks a vagina what’s in the spot where his balls should be?
I read that as “Sandwich Michelle Bachman” and promptly hurled.
[re=550647]ArugulaTeleprompterz[/re]: You wouldn’t like to sandwich her between your jackbooted heel and the curb?
I’m already confused 2 minutes into Bachmann’s speech.
Shrill-a palooza.
Wow. Bachmann seemed pretty normal when she first came out, but it’s been talking point after distorted talking point.
So pretty much now the Teabagger movement is comprised of thousands of compulsive masterbators.
VPOTUS ’12 Soh, are ya gonna bring Trig?
POTUS ’12 No, he’s too busy at the Wasilla Montessori School.
VPOTUS ’12 Too baad, how about that fancy stylist I been hearin’ about? Ya knoww, I could use a new do, and how about one of them snappy little jackets ore something.
POTUS ’12/i> You betcha, Rupert’s payin’ for it all now. Maybe it’s time for you to quit so ya don’t have to worry about that ethicky, donory thing.
Bachmann should not quote Ben Franklin.
“Freedom First”?
WTF?
My favorite was when Bachmann suggested nuking people who instigate Cyber attacks on the US. Even the crowd was confused!
ont size=4>You can watch the live stream of this
Jim, are you nuts? I’m having lunch here.
[re=550650]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: She is just, well, wrong on just about everything. She said that the Declaration of Independence enumerates/safeguards our rights.
There is not enough meth in all of Arkansas that would make it possible for me to watch Stupidstock.
I love the dramatic Star Tribune headline on the left: “Bachmann-Palin Rally Draws THOUSANDS” Geez, Aqueduct Racetrack in Queens draws more than that on a below-zero day in February with the plumbing out. I am so impressed.
Sarah just said “it’s so good to be here, Minnesota”.
Does she know Minnesota is a state, or does she think it’s the name of the person who invited her?
How’s that winkey/grifter workin’ out for ya?
Wow, Palin has lots of pearl necklaces…
[re=550664]wmsheppa[/re]: She meant Cylon attacks. The rest of her speech should make sense now.
I wish Michele fair voyage to ancestral homeworld of Kobol.
Ugh, dammit. Twenty seconds of Sarah’s babbling is quite enough, thank you. Also, those 85 pieces of CZ bling that she’s sporting makes her look like a “Lucky Star” video reject.
[re=550664]wmsheppa[/re]: They apparently haven’t gotten the memo that this is dog whistle for “Nuke China.”
Because Palin and Bachman’s are mothers…with “NO TIME FOR DRAMA.” The world might implode in on itself from the irony.
[re=550680]M Lite[/re]: Not enough! Also!
-SP
which one wears the strap-on ?
[re=550681]S.Luggo[/re]: Please tell me that Track is Starbuck.
Also, if the government is addicted to opium/OPM and Bachmann is the antidote, does that make Bachmann methadone?
[re=550634]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: He has a c*nt. In fact, he’s all c*nt, straight bidness.
When will someone (aliens) realize that these *people* travel in herds, making these events wonderful opportunities for finding new, fat, lazy, gross things to abduct and vivisect?
I’m so glad I’m not watching the horror. It’s much for fun to read.
Doesn’t he realize that he lacks a vagina?
That would explain what he does with the dildo, but I still don’t get the two wetsuits.
I got to hear Palin wrap it up with “Minnesota, you rock!” That voice could clip the thorns off a rose bush.
[re=550701]I Heart Accuracy[/re]: I know what I meant.
What Jim? Why do you say Timmie Pawlenty lacks a vagina? I have heard that he has multiple vaginas.
Glad to hear that Pawlenty’s stream is better. At the state capitol, he’s considered a “sprayer.” Did he go see that urologist in Florida who hates Obama?
The Star Tribune is streaming some old fart talking about “a couple of sacred cows”. Is this their idea of commentary?
You know, a teabagger guy could just maybe listen to deez gals, ifn’t he just thought about boning them. ‘Caue you know, most guys think them girls are dumb enough that a guy could make some time wit ‘em. Why that might even be betterun sittin’ at home watchin’ de Twins, huh?
[re=550739]tencentcomic[/re]: Well, the Twins are on the road playing the Angels. And walleye fishing season hasn’t started yet. Ole and Sven have a lot of time on their hands right now, doncha know?
[re=550634]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Metaphysics is a bitch, ya?
The copters above are just like back when the RNC was in town.
At least this isn’t going to last as long.
I’m sending allllll my welfare peeps down there to kick T-Paw in the jewels after I’m done with them here at work.
Look, it’s Dumb and Dumberer. Palin/Bachmann 2012. Oh, please let it be so…
Thanx to Wonkette I have my ticket for this event. Of course, it’s two-thirds of the way across the country, and I wouldn’t attend if it was across the street, but I got my ticket!
B-b-b-baby, you just ain’t seen nothin’ yet.
I love Bachman-Palin Overdrive
This is like a giant stupid contest to see who can say something really stupid and get the most airtime in the moronic media echo chamber
[re=550645]SmutBoffin[/re]: Damn you. Now this song is stuck in my head.
Come to think of it, Eddie Money does bear a striking resemblance to Sarah Palin during her television sportscaster days — at least in the hair department!
[re=550645]SmutBoffin[/re]: Thank you for that concise report. You’re now in line in front of David Shuster for the next opening at CNN.
[re=550751]GOPCrusher[/re]: Did the Twins enjoy the Guinness Snuggiepalooza?
http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news?slug=ap-angels-fleecerecord
You can make fun of nuclear weapons all you want. But one W54 suitcase bomb at the rally, and the National IQ Average increases by about 25 Points per.
Just somethin’ ta think about.
[re=550791]loquaciousmusic[/re]: Speaking of music and T-Paw…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SwrYMWoqg5w
The live stream from the Star Tribune is now showing wrestling, followed by Lots of Dogs. Is this correct? If Palin rallies are this awesome, I’m switching teams.
Finally, Palin went to the only place in America where her accent makes some semblance of sense: a tard-fest in rural Minnesota.
People literally were passing out during Pawlenty’s speech. For serious. Pictures coming soon (as in when I go home and can download them because I won’t be at work).
[re=550634]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Agreed. he’s a pussy.
Happy Birthday, Michele!
Sincerely,
John Cornyn
Hey now, don’t be hatin’ on Minnesota. Just because we have bad accents and vote for crazy (the most liburl [Wellstone, Franken] with the most rightwing crazy shitbags [Bachmann] and just plain fucking straight up wrestley [Ventura]) We have fun here. Quitty McPalin and Retard Whatshername were in town and I…didn’t notice or care. Instead I found a super cheap liquor store right by my house–$11 for a box of Blues! Go me! Anyway–TPaw is suing the government. Yes, he is personally going to sue the US Government for HCR. It should be noted he is a sitting governor and so is suing Washington even allowed? Again, I don’t care. Hey, beer’s cold. Looky that! You Betcha! Uffda! Hot dish! Ect! Also!!!111!!11
I was at this event. The stupid was deep enough to shovel. Speakers kept referring to the energy present, each time my wife and I looked at each other, I’ve seen performances of modern dance that caused greater energy in the audience, Bachman started with a pledge to repeal HCR and ended with a rambling WWII anecdote illustrating how selfless and generous Americans are. Palins voice could curdle milk. The high point for me was walking out on Palin, oh and shouting “nuke ‘em” during a pause in Bachmans anti-anti-nukes tirade. These people are sheep.
[re=550680]M Lite[/re]: and Bristol didn’t have enough.
I love Timmy’s signature. Nothing like a distinctive scrawl. Crayons could help, though. Whatever.
…wonders why this event wasn’t held at one of the suburban MEGA CHURCHES, so aged guests wouldn’t be forced to deal with urban parking and potential encounters with minorities. Doubt any of those memaws in the crowd live anywhere near MPLS… This event reeks of ignorance,hate and 5-day deodorant. Don’t forget, your grandparents are RACISTS, but we tolerate them because they are powerless; like T-Pau, Bok-man and Palyn.
PS Fuck Don Shelby and his Burlington Coat Factory striped suits.
Early Spring: Don’t forget to put the chemicals down, so you can cut the lawn.
I kind of love Minnesota…I hope and pray that Bachmann challenges Al Franken in 2014…imagine those debates…lmao.
T-Paw? F-That.
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