The Lesbian From HellTom Coburn used to be one of the most conservative senators in the senate, but now that is over. He is a liberal, a communist, and a lesbian, starting this afternoon. Mostly a lesbian, an old lesbian. What he did is tell the folks at a recent town hall that Nancy Pelosi is a “nice lady,” as if she’d never aborted 32 million babies a few weeks ago with her Hammer! This led to some jeering, and then more jeering when he told a lady that the major point of health care reform was not to put people in jail, and that that’s just crap Fox News says to manipulate people, and that people should read a range of news outlets to be properly informed in the national debate. Why is lesbian Tom Coburn such a Muslim?

CONSTITUENT: If there is a possibility of imprisonment, then that’s taking away our liberty. And so, to me, I don’t understand the people who are questioning the constitutionality of this, which I applaud them and I hope our Democrat attorney general will join that fight. But the next question I have is if they can put us in prison, take away our prison, take away our liberty, are they not trampling on our fifth amendment rights by putting it under the IRS?


CONSTITUENT: Because the IRS thinks you’re guilty.


CONSTITUENT: Until proven innocent.

COBURN: I want everybody else to get answer a question, ask a question, so let me. The intention is not to put anybody in jail. That makes for good TV news on Fox, but that isn’t the intention. There is the intention, though, to use the Internal Revenue Service to hold you accountable and you have to prove that you have bought health insurance.

Why can’t Tom Coburn understand that if you can be imprisoned for something, like breaking a law — this new liberal “tax evasion” concept — then that is not in the constitution or whatever? We’ve all heard of “prisons” before. They had them in the Soviet Union, in Barney Frank’s district.

Later on, hellfire:

COBURN: Now that’s the truth. That’s the words. So, I want to set that precedent. So I’m 180 degrees in opposition to the Speaker. She’s a nice lady. I don’t think we can wait.


COBURN: Come on now. She is a nice. How many of y’all have met her? She is a nice person. She’s a nice person. You know, let me give you a little lesson here. I hope you will listen to me. Just because somebody disagrees with you doesn’t mean that they’re not a good person. And I want to tell ya, I’ve been in the Senate for five years and I’ve taken a lot of that because I’ve been on the small side, both in the Republican Party and the Democrat Party. Just because I don’t agree with them, it doesn’t mean I’m bad. It means I have a legitimate point of view that’s different than theirs. And what we have to have is make sure we have a debate in this country so that you can see what’s going on and make the determination yourself. So, don’t catch yourself being biased by Fox News that somebody’s no good. The people in Washington are good. They just don’t know what they don’t know.

Somewhere, David Frum is getting fired from another job.

[Think Progress]

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  1. What? I have to prove to the IRS that I have health insurance?

    Next thing you know, they’ll make me buy car insurance before I can drive my Hummer on the PUBLIC streets.


  2. Perhaps they were jeering at the “lady” part, we all know how much townhallers like to call Nancy Pelosi a man because she exhibits several traits that are commonly associated with men in a patriarchal society such as being in power and botox.

  3. It’s good to see someone who was always a lesbian communist muslim faggot inside come out and be real. Good work, Tommy or Comrade Tammi or Ali or comwhatever you want to call yourself now!

  4. Just speaking for myself, it is MY intention to see Tom Coburn put in jail, since he is guilty until proven innocent of getting a rent subsidy from the cult that runs C Street.

    If he’s defending Speaker Pelosi, maybe he ate too many Peeps on Easter. That sugar high they impart could make a person see truth and justice, if only for a moment. Kinda like acid.

  5. …I’ve been on the small side, both in the Republican Party and the Democrat Party.

    The men I’ve known who’ve been on the small side don’t go around announcing it.

  6. If Coburn had used the words Democratic Party, that’s when he would have gotten some tomatoes thrown at him. How dare he sound like an old-school Repub senator. Marsha Blackburn, Bachman, Boehner, all of them say Democrat Party as code to the teabaggers, letting them know that they think the way the baggers do. But somewhere, Coburn has gotten some polling saying that the sane people of America are beginning to get scared of the Republican Party, which includes Militiamen, the KKK, the nazis, the teabaggers, secessionists– this is the reputation heading the Repubs way.

  7. He’s just making up for his role in making people lose their unemployment and flood insurance by being an obstructionist asshole pig.

    Oh – and here in the Socialist People’s Republic of Massachusetts – we too have to prove on our state tax forms that we have insurance. You get a little document from your health plan and you scribble down an ID number on one section of the tax form, tell them who your carrier is, and then you forget all about it and your refund comes in the mail. That’s all.

    And if you aren’t insured, they kick in your front door and haul you off to prison – but it’s all for laughs. It’s nothing at all. Just a few days of buttsex with sex offenders, a trip to the VD clinic, and your home free. KIDDING. They don’t bring you to the VD clinic.

  8. um pretty much every law has a penalty of imprisonment behind it, doesn’t it? Unless it’s just a fine? so every law is unconstitutional then, because of freedom? I like where you guys are going with this. let me know when i can bang me a couple of teenagers while smoking crack and driving a tank. I’ll be the one driving a tank down the street, with the crack smoke wafting out of the turret, and the giggling, oh the giggling.

  9. to Coburn, a range of newscasts is between Fox and CNN.

    He is so going to get the ‘noose’ photo in his fax machine

    [re=549911]Jukesgrrl[/re]: now that you mention ‘C’ Street, this might be a brown nose attempt, just suck up to the lady Pelosi when there are hints of ethics charges coming down.

  10. And Coburn is not worried about the lesbian within. He’s worried about a lesbian who is trying to get his ass in jail, because he is part of a cult that tried to call an apartmenthouse a church, and he didn’t pay enough rent money.

    Why do those jerks think they are supposed to live in America for free, while calling everybody else freeloaders?

  11. It is easy to sympathize with people like Coburn, but then I remember that it was they who encouraged the fucktards in the first place, who would otherwise just be peacefully watching ppv wrestling and cooking meth in their trailer homes.

    [re=549913]Buzz Feedback[/re]:It’s not just the hair, it’s the glasses.

  12. Coburn is just pissed off that the masses are horning in on the whole ‘fucking democracy with a mailed fist’ gig he and his friends in DC have going on. I mean, Christ, what’s next? Are we going to let them in the Country Club?

  13. Dear Teabagger Constituent: “…if they can put us in prison, take away our prison” then you wouldn’t be in prison anymore, would you? Problem solved.

  14. a strange day indeed- first Coburn reveals his human side (outer cocoon covering the lizard skin) and then i just saw on the news that Quitter Palin admitted to smoking – and inhaling- marijuana! maybe that’s why she quits and can’t speak proper English! you betcha!
    if she comes out for legalization, i may even vote for her (or i will tell that to the pollsters anyway). free marihuana, here we come.

  15. [re=549924]June Cleaver 2.0[/re]: [re=549915]Accordion-o-rama[/re]: Please to explain for us foreigns why saying ‘Democrat Party’ is so insulting, in the US America.

  16. [re=549944]inedalo[/re]: no, somebody offered Palin $25,000 to speak at a legalize MJ rally. She was speaking at a booze rally, so they thought they would ask her too. Profit!

  17. [re=549947]grevillea[/re]: I think it’s like when some rapier-wit prat refers to Labour MPs as ‘Bours’ (=’Boors’ aka boorish types – get it Mate?, harharhar…)

  18. [re=549947]grevillea[/re]: I have no idea and I’m not a foreign. I just wonder why they love saying so much like it’s an insult. At this point it is like so many other terms that aren’t bad unless you say them like a slur. I guess?

  19. [re=549924]June Cleaver 2.0[/re]: Nah, the “Democrat Party” thing goes back to before there were Teabaggers. Bush II used to say it, with his customary hauteur. They can’t call Democrats “the Democratic Party” because that would be a nice compliment, an acknowledgement that in a democracy, good people may disagree without going around calling each other zombie retards.

    So these Republican zombie retards? We need to find some other way to sneer at them. Oh, we can call ’em “Rethugs” in private, amongst ourselves (you know, at our tiki-torch-burning patio parties in Cleveland Park), but for the media? “Republic Party” doesn’t really have the right fingernails-down-a-blackboard quality I’m looking for.


  20. [re=549947]grevillea[/re]: It’s like insisting on calling your coworker “John Bigbooty” when he’s explained at great length that it’s pronounced “Bigboo-TAY.”

  21. “Democrat Party” isn’t an insult. It’s a stupid attempt to withhold the compliment inherent in the proper term, “Democratic Party,” because they don’t want to admit that Democrats are democratic. Get it? It’s totally juvenile, like giggling when you say “titty.”

  22. [re=549951]Bearbloke[/re]: Hadn’t heard that one before. Uninteresting side note: the name of the Australian Labor Party is spelt without the ‘u’, unlike the word ‘labour’ here…

  23. [re=549944]inedalo[/re]: To be fair to Palin (yes, it does seem extremely weird to type that), marijuana use has been legal in Alaska since 1975, so she probably wasn’t breaking any laws.

  24. Yeow, one of Frank Luntz’s focus groups must have been on the happy juice when he ran that little pleasantry past ’em. But there will be hell to pay when they sober up.

  25. [re=549962]grevillea[/re]: Lefty Aussie pols who stand in opposition to Aussie PM Rudd or ‘New Labour’-ites like UK’s Blair or American DLC-types like Clinton and Lieberman might throw in with the Aussie Progressive Labour Party. The ‘U’ they use represents their Socialist Ideological Purity. And as you know, the rest of the Empire’s Commie Pinko MPs use ‘Labour’. Besides – it’s a spoken insult, not a written one…

  26. Everyone needs to gather round the TV and watch FOX TV for it is the funniest comedy channel in the world. If you have any questions about where these tards are getting their orders from, it will become clear. It is funnier than any entertainment ever.

  27. [re=549934]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Seriously. The stench of yet another rat leaving yet another rotted-out FAIL ship is overwhelming in this contard’s oleaginous attempt to slip through a splintery hole and paddle away.

  28. [re=549925]NJB[/re]: God, thank you for reminding me of all the other stuff. I thought I was losing my mind! “You gotta watch something other than FOX?” What planet is he from? Or, rather, what party?

  29. [re=549947]grevillea[/re]: Because they’re fucking retards who can’t be bothered to use the actual correct word because they’re retarded fucks.

  30. The way the law is written, if you don’t have insurance, it’s a fine, unless you don’t pay the fine, but they can’t come after you. Legally. So it’s a fine unless you don’t want to pay it. I wish more fines were levied that way.

  31. Isn’t this the same guy that told that lady in the Townhall last summer to ask her neighbours for help when she said she cannot afford health insurance?

  32. [re=549956]JooJoo Bee[/re]: I agree that Republic Party doesn’t have that nice in-the-belly insult. But calling them teabaggers does. They hate it. And they gave us the name. Thanks teabaggers!

  33. it’s just funny that a Republican, finally tired of the insanity, but he risks his career if he tries to not be batshit crazy for his moronic consituency!

  34. Plan A 1) Get these retards to vote for us. 2) Avoid becoming associated with these retards.3) If necessary, reason with them. This should work, but if not:
    Plan B 1) Get these retards to vote for us. 2) Get advice on stealth from Larry Craig.

  35. I’m shocked that Coburn has chosen this forum to reveal his dalliance with Pelosi.


    We all know that “She’s a nice lady” is code for “She gave me a blowjob.”

  36. [re=549967]JMP[/re]: Wait, what? In Socialist Alaska you get a check from the oil revenue and you can smoke weed? How is it that they have any Republicans at all?

  37. He’s 62 – I looked up his age because I wondered if his lack of toting the worst of the wingnuts’ demagogue-manipulated white & black view of the world (in more ways than one) was a sign he was entering senility.

  38. [re=549947]grevillea[/re]: I may be mistaken, but I thought it was Rush Limbaugh who came up with Democrat Party, because we were not democratic — get it? I never cared that Michelle Malkin et al used it, but when Bush started, he gave the rest of the rightwing congresspeople permission to disrespect the democrats. I think that’s one of the reasons why the gloves have been off re Bush since. He has really divided this country.

  39. [re=550008]pirate king of the Jews[/re]: Isn’t Alaska filled with oily Okies and Texans who couldn’t make it back home so they hightailed it North by Northwest, by way of TR’s nostrils, to make the big Socialist oil bucks in the 70s?

  40. [re=549905]coolcatdaddy[/re]: As far as I know, you still don’t need insurance to drive that Hummer on the sidewalk. Or better yet, into the ocean.

  41. Eh — I’ll be impressed when he votes against his party. Even more so if he votes against what that dumbass dude from The Family tells him to vote for. A subpoena first thing in the morning really lends a bracing clarity to one’s worldview — it would be interesting to see how many of those around the Coburn imbroglio or the C-Street subsidized rent brouhaha suddenly start seeing things a little differently — and if any of them is moved to do more than speak out yet quietly continue with their old ways.

  42. God almighty , these “constituents” are a bunch of brain dead , Play-Doh munching retards. I don’t think they understood more than 15% of what he was saying, anyways.

    Seriously though, Coburn is about to flip sides. My contacts (male escort friends who work C-Street house) are giving me the details.

  43. Where the hell did he ever come up with this sick idea that just because you disagree with someone, they’re not an evil monster who wants to eat your children?

  44. [re=549952]Crank Tango[/re]: [re=549956]JooJoo Bee[/re]: “Democrat Party” is so … 2007. The preferred word for teh Teabaggers is some variation of the words “demon” and “crap” or “rat” stuck together. As in, NOBAMA IS A DEMON-RAT WHO Z TRYING TO IMPOES SOCIALSMS ON ARE FREEDUMS, or TEH DEMONCRAP PARTY IS GOING TO DRIVE US ALL INTO BANKRUPTCY, VOTE RAND PAUL!!!1

  45. [re=549958]JooJoo Bee[/re]: Plus they love that it ends with “RAT” i.e. democRAT.

    I’ll have to admin that I was a little confused by this story. So I came to Ye Olde Wonkette to get the straight scoop. Now I am no less confused — but hate America more.

  46. [re=550028]El Pinche[/re]: Wait — by “flip sides,” do you mean he’s about to become a Democrat or he’s about to have sex with adults?

  47. too fucking little, too fucking late. i wonder how shocked! and dismayed! coburn is when he was met face to face with the real world results of the demagoguery that his party has spent the last year pushing. fuck off, you fucking fuck.

  48. Tom Coburn will allow his head to emerge from his ass two or three times a year to utter something sensible. Then he continues to vote in his usual fashion befitting one of the worst Senators in history.

  49. Hmmm, come to think of it, I wonder if there isn’t a vein to be mined here.

    The Teabaggers are all fired up. The Republican Party has already thrown everything credible and in-credible at the Democrats, and the baggers have been eating it up.

    Now what if the actual, real-world hypocritical behavior of the Republican Party got tossed to the salivating baggers? I think that a lot of them might just be incensed by real world events (this may be a stretch). But look how many have been fired-up by imaginary charges. It’s not like the Democratic Party could ever be accused of anything worse than they have already. Spreading the wealth to the Republicans is only a win-win.

    Of course the media (Wonkette excepted) may be the fly in the ointment.

  50. Well as a newer member of the comintern that is this little lib’rul commonist enclave let me give a shout out to all my fellow libtards, soshilist-fashist-marx’ists on the left coast. I hope we all meet when the death panels begin…I have dibs on Trig.

    Now onto the actual topic, Tom Coburn is really playing with fire here. Just as the wingnuts spent DECADES hard working at creating this nutty firewall, this impearmeable barrier for safe refuge from facts and reality and to concoct various conspiracy theories as to the intention of us Soviets to take their little bubble away…..Tom Coburn goes and spoils it for them. You could hear desperation in the voices of some of these lunatics as they lustilly booed any possible positive terminology to be applied to any democrat, especially PELOSI!

    Tom Coburn inspite of his impeccable credentials as a leader of the wingnuts of the Southwest will now be fired from his job at Fox (he plays a Senator on Hannity’s sitcom called “The GOP”) and will also be shunned and summarily banned from all “Family” mixers/orgies from now on and in the future, bet on it. Oh and in two weeks Rush will consume him live on the air and online with “Rusty Vision” also.

  51. So, has this COMMUNIST FASCIST ANTICRIST HOMOSEXUAL TERRORIST LIBRRIL MUSLIN HERETIC ‘Tommi’-girl Coburn yet been purged from The True Christan Real American Patriotic Republican Party? Can any Wonketteers from his state give us more info?

  52. [re=550041]Holding Out for a Hero[/re]: I am. I’ve been eating pasta all week. (May you be blessed by his noodley appendages . . .)

    [re=549947]grevillea[/re]: “Democrat Party” is pretty widely used outside the u.s. it is true. Concocting the right suffix to convert a noun into an adjective in any particular case in English is pretty much fucked. But, in theory, it is ungrammatical, just one more reason the teabaggers and republicans love it as a social marker: being an idiot is essential to remaining true to the group. This way they can have a flipping Harvard degree and still realistically call out the east coast ivy-league elites as the biggest danger to the country.

    But if you get corrected, sharply, just nod and say, oh yeah, sorry and move on. The frustration level is running pretty high so don’t take it personally.

  53. If Socialism can infiltrate and infect the brain of someone like Tom Coburn, who says it cannot infect someone in your very state?

    In your very town?

    Your neighbor?

    Your lover?


  54. Sheesh, I’ll bet he has prostate cancer or something.. Just tryin’ to make good with everyone before the inevitable. Or something..

  55. Hey; you guys just see what happened? The dog actually tried wagging its tail, instead of the tail wagging the dog!

    Seriously, what a fucking pathetic state we’re in when it is headline newsw that a partisan spoke neutrally of his opposition. Really, what hath God wrought that a Republican called the Democratic Speaker of the House a “nice lady”, right? Calling Nancy a “nice lady” is akin to a Jew calling Jesus a “kick-ass carpenter” is Jews were to regularly use the adjective kick-ass. It’s about as backhanded a compliment as you can get, and it’s considered earth-shattering news?

    OMG! A Republican called a Democrat something other than an alien/communist/socialist/pedophile/(insert negative noun, here). Someone get The Politico on the phone post-haste!

    In other news, Tom Coburn is STILL very much a crazy-fuck. Oklahoma has the two most crazy Senators in the Senate, hands down.

  56. “People in Washington are good. They just don’t know what they don’t know.” Republicans never did cotton on to the fact that Donald Rumsfeld was a gibberish spouting mongoose who pretty much everybody in the world was laughing at.

    but while we are trying to explain the inexplicable…oh, yeah, somebody’s got something on Coburn.

  57. There is a quite excellent strain of marijuana, not the best, mind you, because the very best is what grows in the volcanic soil on the north coast of the big island of Hawaii, but indubitably high quality stuff known as Matanuska Thunderfuck, which I think deserves the title of coolest reefer brand name in the known universe.
    Wasilla is in the Matanuska Valley. Gotta support local business, doncha know.

  58. “Thank you Sarah Palin for standing up for a conservative republican party when the clueless establishment went on listening tours and loser liberals like David Frum, David Brooks, Colin Powell, John Avlon, George Will, Steve Schmidt, Sam Tanenhaus, and Kathleen Parker tried to assert themselves and move the republican party far to the left. ”

    I love me that RedState blog – it’s so silly!

  59. [re=550075]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Socialism is the toxoplasma gondii of politics. There you are living in your trailer, playing with your guns and screaming about long form birth certificates, then you eat some catshit and the next thing you know you have joined ACORN and SEIU.

  60. [re=550065]Sparky McGruff[/re]: Coburn may have said to himself, Am I right? Am I wrong? And he may have said to himself, My God! What Have I Done?!

  61. [re=549944]inedalo[/re]:

    Of course, she did. One of her many aborted attempts at college was in Hawaii. It’s a required part of the curriculum there.

  62. This is called “Change the Message”. Remember Coburn made this speech March 31, and last week he also blocked the Unemployed Insurance and extended COBRA benefits for laid off employees. There is also a problem with “The Family” and the Church where he lives in DC, that is finally breaking into the MSM. Instead lets talk about what a good Senator he is instead of denying benefits to his Oklahoma Citizens who are out of work and now out of Unemployment Benefits, and the other vexing problems. Pretty Smart Senator and maybe some of the Okies will buy it, but you will get outed on Wonkette.

  63. Gah. I felt like shit yesterday and missed the wonkette headline for which I am imminently qualified to address.

    Tom has never been political. He is a doktor and knows more than anyone about anything. The good doktor makes decisions based on his own eschatological view of the world. None of this shit really matters to Tom. He’s simply being gracious and generous by bothering to serve in the senate because he is the only senator who knows shit, but it doesn’t really matter because we’re going to raptured up any minute. Well, he is. The rest of us are toast. Including that nice lady Nancy Pelosi.

    Of course, he’s there because of the largesse of Club for Growth and Chesapeake Energy, who like him because he is a crazy, anti-government wingnut who doesn’t give a shit about global warming, since none of this matters anyway.

    Dust Bowl Blues officially cuts him no slack. Neither should the wonkeratti.

  64. [re=550088]snideinplainsight[/re]: Further down in that piece is “Marco Rubio has all but buried Charlie Crist”. Is “buried” a new term for a blow job? I like to stay informed about these things.

  65. [re=550013]June Cleaver 2.0[/re]: it was actually frank luntz. to grevillea, to sum up, also, what others, too, have said, the proper name of the party is the “the democratic party.” “democrat party” is a subtle, off-handed, childish insult, and if you pay attention, you’ll notice that only our opponents use it.

    and uh, aren’t these teabaggers proudly clinging to guns and religion now? and, uh, didn’t they get a little pissy when obama said that in san francisco (the gay socialist capital of USSA) in 2008?

  66. The guy’s from Oklahoma; if these wingnuts were real patriots they would send him vinyl siding purchased through until either Coburn retires from government in shame or Erik Erickson gets a yacht.

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