WIN THE MORNING WIN THE WORLD  11:01 pm April 3, 2010

SCANDAL: Obama Fills Out Census Form, Is Black

by Ken Layne

It's called the WHITE House, take our country BACK (from coloreds).
Of course this story got buried on the weekend, when nobody pays attention to anything. Obama, that thief who somehow won the election by getting all those popular and electoral votes, filled out his nasty socialist Census — when did we have to deal with that intrusive crap before Nobama, eh? — and what do you know, Mister Chicago Street Thug ‘fessed up and described himself as “black” on the Census form, according to journalistic Truth Crusader the Politico. Fishy, no? Wasn’t his mom white? Or did he even *have* a mom? Kenyans have two daddies, we heard.

But the Politico version of this crucial story was somehow lacking, presentation-wise, compared to the MSNBC story. Why does MSNBC hate white America:
Yeah, maybe official in the SOVIET UNION.
(Thanks to Wonkette operatives “Sparky” and “Sonya F.” and another dozen of you good people who took time out of your weekend orgies to point us to these MSNBC and Politico articles.)

 
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{ 133 comments }

Smoke Filled Roommate April 3, 2010 at 11:09 pm

OMG–wait till his family finds out!!

CanadianBacon April 3, 2010 at 11:10 pm

But the important question is how many times a day does his family flush the toilet a day?
In the land of sun and fun
We don’t flush for number one.

gbear April 3, 2010 at 11:11 pm

I bet he was black in 2000 too, the scamp.

El Kabong April 3, 2010 at 11:12 pm

once you go black, you never go back

Y.T. Erickson April 3, 2010 at 11:14 pm

This explains everything.

FlipOffResearch April 3, 2010 at 11:17 pm

Arguably, if he had to choose one or the other, he could choose white. Mom white, dad black, that’s a tie. He was raised by the moms family, tipping the scales. But really, who cares. Too bad there isn’t a box that says doof or intellectual.

Troubledog April 3, 2010 at 11:26 pm

Mulatto is a funny word. It sounds like something Haley Barbour would say.

ArugulaTeleprompterz April 3, 2010 at 11:30 pm

Saw this in the WSJ this morning – I was waiting for the shitstorm to start. I’m sure we’ll be hearing the Nobama is a rascist in 3..2..1..

Jim89048 April 3, 2010 at 11:32 pm

Excellent news for John McCain!

danadevin85 April 3, 2010 at 11:34 pm

If he wasn’t the president of the United States would anyone care what box he checked?
White folks know they made up the one drop rule
so i wish they would stop acting surprised when it’s used

FlipOffResearch April 3, 2010 at 11:38 pm

[re=548165]FlipOffResearch[/re]: They would have raised hell no matter what he said. Sorry.

ManchuCandidate April 3, 2010 at 11:39 pm

I thought he was a Kenyan Indonesian Mooslim Christian Anti-Semite Nazi Commie Socialist Hitler. They don’t have a box for that in the US Americuh Cesus (sic)?

The family portrait is interesting. I wonder if it was socialism that made the photog put the child with the parent they resembled the most.

LowerdPeninsula April 3, 2010 at 11:46 pm

Gawd, this is so fucking pitiful. The respect I feel for the media could fit on the head of a pin, and this stupid shit reduced it even from that. That MSNBC headline is just vomit-inducing. Do you want a stool sample, too, MSNBC?

The president is a far more patient and open man than myself. I’d have simply told ‘em to fuck off and go back on the same dead horse on which you came.

obfuscator April 3, 2010 at 11:48 pm

“i hate black illinois nazis.”

Escape Goat Nation April 3, 2010 at 11:50 pm

I found this article relatively easy to masturbate to.

SayItWithWookies April 3, 2010 at 11:52 pm

This is a huuuuuge betrayal of the Lizard People.

Lefty Lucy April 3, 2010 at 11:54 pm

Gawd, Michelle. I covet that shirt. Where did you get it???

obfuscator April 3, 2010 at 11:56 pm

[re=548175]SayItWithWookies[/re]: way to ignore the REAL question, politico: did john boehner check “leather-faced oompaloompa-caucasian-american”?

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2010 at 11:56 pm

Say it loud, he’s black and he’s proud.

ElRat April 3, 2010 at 11:57 pm

What? He’s black? What!!! Alert the world …. oh wait.

LowerdPeninsula April 3, 2010 at 11:58 pm

[re=548159]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: I know, right? Wait ’till Michelle finds out she’s been messing with a black man. She’ll go blab proudly to all of her friends.

[re=548166]Troubledog[/re]: WWHBS? What Would Haley Barbour Say? I like it; it has a nice ring to it. However, I believe Haley, being from Mississippi and whatnot, is much more partial to old fashioned and standard “Negro” or maybe when he’s feeling creative (which is also the feeling he gets when his fat-ass is with gas) the more florid and poetic “Quadroon” and “Ocotoroon” or “Muggle”.

BTW, hand to god, one of the inbred Hutaree wives up here in Michigan defending herself against the charge or racism said she and her husband and kin can’t be racist, because they’ve got “Colored” friends. Seriously, this girl was no older than 20-something years old living a few dozen miles from Detroit, and the bitch used the word Colored as naturally and unironic as she would any other word her her limited vocabulary. God bless the hicks!

Smoke Filled Roommate April 4, 2010 at 12:05 am

[re=548177]obfuscator[/re]: which is what Charlie Crist should have checked as well.. Also, Glenn Beck actually circled the box for Pig-eyed Fuckface instead of following directions, so he may get his back.

obfuscator April 4, 2010 at 12:10 am

[re=548181]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: i think beck should have checked the “pie-faced fucktarded heffalump”.

Bearbloke April 4, 2010 at 12:13 am

Perhaps this whole “I too, are a Black” declaration was demanded by Peter Cottontail’s ‘domestic partner’ Brer Rabbit, in exchange for a shiny new iPad for Barack left under the Easter Tree in the morn?

populucious April 4, 2010 at 12:20 am

Well sh*t…I totally wouldn’t have voted for him if I’d known about this. I thought he just went to the same tanning salon as Mitt Romney.

Escape Goat Nation April 4, 2010 at 12:24 am

Ok, now I want to see how Michael Steele answered it.

melissayoyo April 4, 2010 at 12:30 am

WTF we’ve been duped!

Jim89048 April 4, 2010 at 12:34 am

Why has nobody demanded to see his birth certificate?

Sparky McGruff April 4, 2010 at 12:44 am

I’m still shocked that there wasn’t a check box for “Secret Muslin”.

SayItWithWookies April 4, 2010 at 12:53 am

[re=548177]obfuscator[/re]: Boehner, to nobody’s surprise, is a mix: he’s 50% Walnut Veneer and 50% Alamo Sunset.

iburl April 4, 2010 at 12:53 am

The census actually says “Black, Af. American, of Negro.” (which is it?)
Why can’t ‘whites’ have 3? “White, Eu. American, or Regular”?
Common real american sense says it’s a UN plot. That’s why I shredded my census form and donated it to Glenn Beck’s Ticker Tape parade for the freedoms of 9-12 project.

obfuscator April 4, 2010 at 12:59 am

[re=548191]SayItWithWookies[/re]: you know how your index and middle fingers turn orangey after decades of smoking? it’s like boehner’s entire body is like that.

i’d say he’s also 21% smoky apricot, 289% burnt orange.

BadKitty April 4, 2010 at 12:59 am

Wait…. he’s black? Oh lord, wait until all the angry old white dudes hear about this.

hotdog April 4, 2010 at 1:02 am

4 x 3/5 = 2.4 members of the household

El Pinche April 4, 2010 at 1:22 am

What? He didn’t check Kenyan?
IM ASKING A VERY SIMPLE QUESTION, WHERES YOUR LONG FORM MR HUSSAYN ???

mollymcguire April 4, 2010 at 1:23 am

Café au lait?

El Pinche April 4, 2010 at 1:28 am

[re=548194]BadKitty[/re]: good god!! It’s time to gear up for another “March on Washington” (KKK rally + Golden Corral buffet everyday!) or for another patriot to defy big government (by ramming a plane into a federal building). It’s parenthesis night!! (fuck yeah!!)

Smoke Filled Roommate April 4, 2010 at 1:30 am

[re=548193]obfuscator[/re]: I think he’s actually Latex by now.

Radiotherapy April 4, 2010 at 1:33 am

Happy Easter all you libtard, vegan, atheist, commie-fascist, Prius-driving, Ethiopian Jews difficult to encapsulate, yet ever-amusing wits. Invoking Fuzzy Bunny Racist Zoeller, Enjoy your chocolate eggs, or leg of lamb….or whatever you people eat.

obfuscator April 4, 2010 at 1:39 am

[re=548199]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: i’m actually hoping that barry sat at the resolute desk after watching some cable news and decided to check “black as hell, motherfucker” just to piss off every Fucking Retard in america.

frailamerica April 4, 2010 at 1:45 am

No doubt because there wasn’t a box to check off “Cylon.”

Radiotherapy April 4, 2010 at 1:49 am

[re=548201]obfuscator[/re]: And then go out and give Easter eggs to a gaggle of enthusiastic American kids from every race, religion, creed, and roots.

Smoke Filled Roommate April 4, 2010 at 1:51 am

[re=548201]obfuscator[/re]: feet on the desk, sans jacket.. No, wait– feet on desk in his Presential Skivvies with a nice single malt scotch in hand.

Dolmance April 4, 2010 at 2:01 am

He’s black?! What the fuck! Holy shit! I just thought my TV was fucked up. Jesus Christ!

heathenish April 4, 2010 at 2:05 am

[re=548182]obfuscator[/re]: [re=548182]obfuscator[/re]: I believe your both right, good job.

I just can’t believe the President is Black, why didn’t someone tell(MSNBC) us sooner?

gurukalehuru April 4, 2010 at 2:09 am

I’m going to go out on a limb and defend the fucktards here, a little bit, without actually denying their inherent and, apparently, eternal fucktardedness.
First, it was a case of damned if you do or damned if you don’t for Barry. If he’d have checked “white” the wingers heads would have truly sploded.
But it was also a case of damned if you do or damned if you don’t for the headline writers at Politico. What I’m getting at here is I hate the term “African-American.” African-American doesn’t delineate black people more specifically, it’s merely an unnecessary synonym, a euphemism for something that didn’t need a euphemism.
I have seen, in the press, people described as African-American who were not American at all. Also, when you see a news report about an unidentified person of that race, as in “the suspect is an African-American male, approximately 6 feet tall and 190 lbs.” it’s possibly untrue, since you have no proof that the suspect is American.
The term can be misleading, and misleading is inherently dangerous.
So, I’ve got no problem with the headline writers at Politico using the word black. They are still fucktards, for plenty of other reasons, but I’m not adding negative points for this one.

obfuscator April 4, 2010 at 2:10 am

[re=548203]Radiotherapy[/re]: [re=548204]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: both of you win.

obfuscator April 4, 2010 at 2:18 am

[re=548207]gurukalehuru[/re]: or they could have not posted the retarded ‘story’ in the first place.

Smoke Filled Roommate April 4, 2010 at 2:46 am

I believe that’s what happens when Politico is understaffed.. Next, they will totally win some fucking morning with “The Sky is Blue– Today”. Or, Scoop!–”Why America Loves Dick Cheney”..

LowerdPeninsula April 4, 2010 at 3:39 am

[re=548207]gurukalehuru[/re]: I think you’re TOTALLY overthinking this. People are angry that the story was done in the first place, not what term was used. I mean, did anyone ever ask Dubya what his dumb ass checked on the Census? I’m sure when Dubya fills out the form, this year, and gets to the question of what his race is, he’ll stare into the sky and ask why “100 meter dash” wasn’t listed.

LowerdPeninsula April 4, 2010 at 3:46 am

[re=548191]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Seriously, someone needs to take a picture of Boner to Home Depot (or your local, indepdent paint shop/hardware store if you’re a dirty, fucking hippie) and match him up with the appropriate swatch/sample. I’m insanely interested in what number this guy is. I’d think he’d be a High Fulvous.

Y.T. Erickson April 4, 2010 at 4:38 am

At least he didn’t try to pass.

geminisunmars April 4, 2010 at 4:45 am

Well, I just gotta say (mostly because goddamn it, something woke me up and here it is the middle of the night, and I lost my snark) that I lurve that pix of that family, whatever box(es) they checked.

OhCrapIHaveACrushOnSarahPalin April 4, 2010 at 5:32 am

[re=548169]danadevin85[/re]: Lol he only marked what the rest of us Blk Ppl have been marking since they took “colored” off as a category. Whites are just tripped up by Obama because they think so-called “mixed” people only look like Halle Berry…oh, wait…

OhCrapIHaveACrushOnSarahPalin April 4, 2010 at 5:38 am

Hm, gee, I wonder what box my grandmother in Arkansas checked, after they instituted their one-drop rule in 1913, when she was 17. I doubt “Black White Cherokee” was ever an option, so I’m going with “colored”.

bflrtsplk April 4, 2010 at 6:37 am

Isn’t that MuslinArab guy who moved to Newark from Ethiopia to be a U.S. citizen an African-American? Just askin.’

Black is black… Want my baby back.

Cookie Guggelman April 4, 2010 at 7:10 am

Black is beautiful!

ForTheTurnstiles April 4, 2010 at 7:25 am

no snark: this white guy (cock asian if you like) would really like to be the father if Michelle Obama’s next few kids…

libwakman April 4, 2010 at 7:48 am

Checking Black will be his Waterloo..
Or his Watermelon..
10 inches of bad to the bone prazezident!

Naked Bunny with a Whip April 4, 2010 at 8:05 am

Obama also checked “male”. Where is the headline?! People need to know!!!

TGY April 4, 2010 at 8:07 am

[re=548224]Cookie Guggelman[/re]: Yes, today we are all black.

Diana Davies April 4, 2010 at 8:08 am

Gee, and all this time I thought he was white. This is quite a novelty!

gurukalehuru April 4, 2010 at 8:12 am

[re=548213]LowerdPeninsula[/re]: Yeah, you’re right.

Sparky McGruff April 4, 2010 at 8:48 am

[re=548193]obfuscator[/re]: Sounds like Boehner’s color would be 30% Tar, 70% Nicotine.

By the way, now that I’m officially a Wonkette Operative, do I get a special “press pass” that I can carry around? And when do I get my big paycheck (I’m assuming operatives get paid in cat food coupons? Cigarette butts?)

x111e7thst April 4, 2010 at 9:37 am

[re=548198]El Pinche[/re]: Marching is too much like exercise. Best to protest by purchasing crap from the son of Eric and sending it , by mail, to DC in ones stead.

Autochthon April 4, 2010 at 9:51 am

Obviously, this is what’s known in the gossip-rag business as a “slow news day.” What, precisely, did they THINK he was going to check on the Census form?

And are those kids adorable or what?!

El Pinche April 4, 2010 at 9:56 am

[re=548232]x111e7thst[/re]: Fight Big Government by donating to my political campaign.

Hemp Dogbane April 4, 2010 at 10:10 am

[re=548192]iburl[/re]: I checked White; Redness; some Peeling.

Hemp Dogbane April 4, 2010 at 10:12 am

[re=548235]Autochthon[/re]: Pope. Yes it’s a slow Pope news weekend. Pope. What else are they Pope going to get excited Pope about? Pope.

richardwb1 April 4, 2010 at 10:31 am

[re=548200]Radiotherapy[/re]: Leg of egg, chocolate lamb. Whatever.
Happy Easter, All.
Thanks for sharing the joy and sorrow.

“Roll away the stone.
Don’t leave me here alone.
Resurrect me, and protect me.
Don’t leave me laying here.
What will they do in two thousand years?”

V572625694 April 4, 2010 at 10:38 am

What? There wasn’t a box marked “NI6GA”?

[re=548193]obfuscator[/re]: Is it smoking or bathing in masticated Cheeto slurry that makes Boehner look like that?

rocktonsammy April 4, 2010 at 10:49 am

I DON’T EVEN WANT TO EAT MY CHOCOLATE BUNNY NOW,THANKS WONKETT.

AnglRdr April 4, 2010 at 10:52 am

[re=548200]Radiotherapy[/re]: And a Happy Zombie Jesus Day to you, too!

Doesn’t BHNobama know he’s pretty much used up all his Affirmative Action points now so he should feel free to check black and white, just like I do?

Katydid April 4, 2010 at 10:52 am

He didn’t check “black and white?” What is he, a cookie?

/snark off
I’ll tell you what, I was a really good reporter, if I do say so myself, and it would never have occurred to me to ask that question. As an editor, I’d have slapped any reporter who came up with that question. I saw this post last night, and it made me sick.

What I want to know is why Gibbs, presumably, answered the question. Why didn’t he give them the fisheye and say, “What is your problem?” until the reporter died of whatever stupidity caused it to ask the question. That is all.

the problem child April 4, 2010 at 10:53 am

How can he check black and white if there is no zebra/ orca/ panda option?

JoeTheMechanic April 4, 2010 at 10:56 am

I got a confession to make…

I like this guy, our Prez.
I just like him, I can’t help it.

DemmeFatale April 4, 2010 at 10:56 am

Happy Easter, people!

(Thanks for making my morning with the snark and awesome pic!)

Fly Over Girl April 4, 2010 at 11:00 am

[re=548244]AnglRdr[/re]: Hey, I celebrate that holiday ’cause if Jesus rose from the dead, doesn’t that make him a Zombie? So we enjoy our Zombie Jesus Day with an annual viewing of Zombie flicks.

I wonder if any Congress-dude will take up the cause and re-label the “race” boxes on the census?

gurukalehuru April 4, 2010 at 11:10 am

[re=548239]Hemp Dogbane[/re]: I believe you have hit the Pope on the head.

AnglRdr April 4, 2010 at 11:15 am

[re=548245]Katydid[/re]: In all seriousness, I actually think it is valid question to ask, but that’s because I am biracial myself, and my daughter is actually black, white and Asian.

While the census allows for self-identification, I do think he erred in not marking black and white. Sociologically speaking, I don’t think it can be said his American experience has been exclusively informed by being black in America, as he was raised by a white mother.

I’m a little hopped up on chocolate and jelly beans right now to explain it very well, though.

[re=548249]Fly Over Girl[/re]: I am totally adopting/stealing your tradition and making it mine, because it is that awesome.

Oldskool April 4, 2010 at 11:25 am

So why is this news? I thought everyone agreed Clinton was the first.

Holding Out for a Hero April 4, 2010 at 11:25 am

Looking at the photo, we’ve got one very intelligent President, one extremely hot First Lady and two adorable and from all accounts polite and well-adjusted kids. Who gives a rat’s rear-end about how they filled out the Census form?

Chuckie Jesus April 4, 2010 at 11:54 am

Don’t worry, Hopey, this halfrican checked Black, too. They’re only acting shitty because you’re famous. If you weren’t, there’d be no question of your blackness, as they’d all be grabbing their purses tighter and crossing the street to avoid you. Yeah, even in that suit.

Cape Clod April 4, 2010 at 11:56 am

I guess there must not have been a box that said “Mudblood.”

Chuckie Jesus April 4, 2010 at 12:01 pm

[re=548251]AnglRdr[/re]: I was raised by a white mother, too, but they sure as shit don’t see a white lady walking down the street when Chuckie Jesus is on the stroll.

Yeah, sure, us halfricans are speshul snowflakes, and sure, the “multiracial experience” is a tad different from the “black experience”. We all know that. The census is probably going to have to catch up with that, eventually. But, for me, the “Black” box worked just fine. It probably works OK for Hopey, too. They would have bitched at him no matter what he put down.

“I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends and… uh… my thermos. Huh? My story? Okay. It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child…” – Steve Martin, The Jerk

Fly Over Girl April 4, 2010 at 12:12 pm

[re=548251]AnglRdr[/re]: Thank you :) You are very welcolme to participate. My fave is Shawn of the Dead. On a good year, we usually get through about three Zombie flicks. This year will prolly be limited to one.

The New Year’s tradition is to watch all three Lord of the Rings extended versions back-to-back-to-back. There are a couple of personal reasons for doing it, but I like the ties to the New Year with your journey in life and the destruction of the ultimate evil (aka Cheney).

Crank Tango April 4, 2010 at 12:20 pm

Black man, black woman, black baby
White man, white woman, white baby
White man, black woman, black baby
Black man, white woman, black baby

(Just had to throw a little PE into the mix!)

DirtyHarriett April 4, 2010 at 12:28 pm

You mean to tell me that uppity negro is Black?!
I always knew there something was a bit “off” about him.

I WANT MY PREZNIT BACK!!!!1!
Also.

Monsieur Grumpe April 4, 2010 at 12:42 pm

Happy Easter Libtards.

Have some inappropriate holiday lyrics from Zappa.

Those Jesus Freaks
Well, they’re friendly but
The shit they believe
Has got their minds all shut
An’ they don’t even care
When the church takes a cut
Ain’t it bleak when you got so much nothin’
(So whaddya do)
Eat that pork
Eat that ham
Laugh till ya choke
On Billy Graham
Moses, Jesus ‘n Abraham…
They’re all a waste of time
‘N it’s yer ass that’s on the line
(IT’S YER ASS THAT’S ON THE LINE)

sati demise April 4, 2010 at 12:51 pm

[re=548256]Chuckie Jesus[/re]: there can be some blowback…my grandfather was half Shawnee Indian but could pass for white. So he did. and now all us descendants do not get free NA college scholarships.
He could have admitted he was Native American, and been deported to the Rez for life.
but sadly no, all us kids have to pay for school forever because he wanted to live like a white guy.

mustardman April 4, 2010 at 12:55 pm

Why does Obama hate white people?

weejee April 4, 2010 at 12:57 pm

[re=548260]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Ol’ Frank was a freddie fraternity like those Kappa Sigs who pooped on all those Becktards with their parking lot crapper caper. Frank’s frat was Phi Zappa Crappa.

Katydid April 4, 2010 at 12:58 pm

[re=548251]AnglRdr[/re]: I don’t agree that it’s a valid question from the press, unless, to your point, they want to report why it’s a valid question. But the Politico report isn’t that story, and the MSNBC linky is no longer good, so I didn’t read it. With that headline, why do I doubt it’s a good story?

SayItWithWookies April 4, 2010 at 1:09 pm

[re=548261]sati demise[/re]: Hey, at least your grandfather had a choice (sort of). One of the lesser-known tragedies here in the Commmonwealth of Virginia is that there was a guy who listed all First Peoples as Colored because there wasn’t much recognition of Indian tribes and he could basically do whatever he wanted. Thus he bureaucratically buried the heritage of many many people here. I’ll see if I can find his name and some info.

SayItWithWookies April 4, 2010 at 1:14 pm

[re=548261]sati demise[/re]: Here he is: Walter Plecker, early 20th Century. The Richmond Times-Dispatch every so often does some good reporting, and here is a too-often buried shameful piece of our past:
http://www.mitsawokett.com/Documentary%20Genocide%20Virginia.htm

Miss Crabbypants April 4, 2010 at 1:30 pm

Is “orgy” the same thing as “clusterfuck”?

Bearbloke April 4, 2010 at 1:38 pm

[re=548244]AnglRdr[/re]: [re=548243]rocktonsammy[/re]: Happy Zombie Jesus Day ? You mena Week-end , doncha – down here, ‘Er Majesty grants us Good Friday and Easter Monday for holidays so we have plenty of time to get right pissed. The Tazzies even get Easter Tuesday on top, lucky bastards! By then, we”ve finished the wine, we’re sick of lamb (especially if you’re on a station and you know one of your M8s shagged it earlier) and even the Choco Bilbies – shaped like a yummy desert rat since the Aussie HATE bloody rabbits… but it latelatelate here and I’m off to bed. Happy Zombie Jesus day, yanks!

Aurelio April 4, 2010 at 1:39 pm

Why is there no place on the form to check “mulatto,” “quadroon” or “octoroon”? That way Barry and would not be forced into an impossible choice. It would be more precise and informative, too.

laziestgal April 4, 2010 at 1:50 pm

Um, this story was in the news Friday.

Smoke Filled Roommate April 4, 2010 at 2:22 pm

[re=548269]Aurelio[/re]: My form was equally confusing. I think I ended up checking ‘trapezoid’.

rottenart April 4, 2010 at 2:59 pm

[re=548261]sati demise[/re]: [re=548265]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Fucking white people. They ruin everything nice.

rottenart April 4, 2010 at 3:01 pm

On another note, how could anyone, racist redneck half-wit or not, look at that pic and think anything evil? It’s like goddamn Father Knows Best! This has to be the most normal, well-adjusted family in America. God bless Zombie Jesus, and Murka, for the children. And Lizard People.

Jim89048 April 4, 2010 at 3:12 pm

Wake UP, sheeple! By checking the “black” box, for the next 10 years 1600 Pennsylvania Ave will be inhabited by 5 people of color according to statistics, thereby bending the curve and probably providing for free lunches at that Friends school or whatnot.

nappyduggs April 4, 2010 at 4:18 pm

Do they have a “quadroon” box for the girls? NO?!!?
WILL SOMEBODY PLEEZ THINK OF TEH CHILLUNS!!!1!11

glamourdammerung April 4, 2010 at 4:28 pm

[re=548167]ArugulaTeleprompterz[/re]: Saw this in the WSJ this morning – I was waiting for the shitstorm to start. I’m sure we’ll be hearing the Nobama is a rascist in 3..2..1..

Oh, the retards have been harping on this all weekend already.

glamourdammerung April 4, 2010 at 4:33 pm

I am still looking for a story on what race Boehner claimed. Certainly, the liberal media must have done a hit piece on Boehner about whether or not he picked “white” on the census form.

bitchincamaro April 4, 2010 at 5:07 pm

I think it’d be cool if the US Census people sent out deluxe boxes of Crayola crayons with each form and asked the respondent to fill it out with whichever crayon most closely matched their skin tone. For fun. And accuracy.

/copyright!

Carrabuda April 4, 2010 at 5:59 pm

[re=548245]Katydid[/re]: Brava! I now have a girlcrush on you.

Sparky McGruff April 4, 2010 at 6:17 pm

[re=548294]Jim89048[/re]: Wow. I hadn’t thought about that. What’s it going to do to the resale value of properties on the 1600 Penn block?

Pandy April 4, 2010 at 6:48 pm

[re=548308]glamourdammerung[/re]: that’s because he is really a redbone.

sezme April 4, 2010 at 7:07 pm

In America, if you’re even just a little bit black, you’re black, black, black as the ace of spades. This is called Equality. Really that particular box on the Census form is more a matter of how well you can dance.

Country Club Jihadi April 4, 2010 at 7:39 pm

His mama’s so black…
Word.

hotdog April 4, 2010 at 8:11 pm

[re=548207]gurukalehuru[/re]: And it takes less energy to say “black.” Why use seven syllables when one will suffice?

Flanders April 4, 2010 at 8:40 pm

[re=548189]Jim89048[/re]: Perfect!

Mr Blifil April 4, 2010 at 8:41 pm

In his defense, the socialists who run the census objected to including the terms “half-breed” and “octoroon.” Plus checking black is a good way to get a nubile young white census worker to perform a follow-up seeking “verification.”

Flanders April 4, 2010 at 8:46 pm

Why does NoBama hate white people?

Flanders April 4, 2010 at 8:47 pm

[re=548262]mustardman[/re]: I guess I should have read the comments before posting. DOH!

a_pink_poodle April 4, 2010 at 9:26 pm

I knew it! He is Kenyan! IMPEACH HIM!

nappyduggs April 4, 2010 at 11:44 pm

“Wasn’t his mom white? Or did he even *have* a mom? Kenyans have two daddies, we heard.”

Or he is a “Kenyan pod person,” which is ever so troubling…

Or one of his two “Kenyan daddies” is in fact white, Jewish, and happens to be Paul Reiser.

Allllllllsooooooo.

LowerdPeninsula April 5, 2010 at 12:58 am

[re=548317]bitchincamaro[/re]: For lack of a better term, that’d be a bitchin’ idea, bitchincamaro.

Bearbloke April 5, 2010 at 1:05 am

[re=548294]Jim89048[/re]: I’ll bet that’s the very reasoning Obama used whilst filling in his form…

Chet Kincaid April 5, 2010 at 1:07 am

As far as I’ve seen, the only people who are disappointed by this are the mixed-race folks who are really into being mixed-race and wanted Obama to legitimize them as some kind of separate and permanent ethnicity.

Which is kind of pointless. If you have a black and white parent, that will be true for you, but not for your offspring. Whoever they choose to reproduce with will take their descendants down a different path. And “mixed race” is not a “culture” with a long-established history. Is there some culture where all members are required to marry someone of another race? That’s absurd. Unless you’re counting some old New Orleans caste society that frowns on members marrying people who are darker than a paper bag in an attempt to establish a “better” i.e. “lighter” cast within the black community.

I think Americans in general are really confused about what an “African-American” is versus a person who is genetically descended from Africans. In case you hadn’t noticed, “African-Americans” come in a variety of skin colors. This is, to put it bluntly, because of generations of rape by slave owners. Our ancestors were mixed-race by force, cruelty and slaveowners’ privilege. Yet our different shades are not a “separate ethnicities,” because we all share the same specifically African-American culture.

So, since the 50s or 60s, black and white folks may have chosen willingly to partner with each other and raise families. Their kids might be genetically identical to someone who carries just as many white and black genes due to slavery, but the cultural experience of being an African-American with ancestors who have mixed genetics as well, is different than modern, one-generation, “mixed-race” experience. And after the races mix once, I think it’s likely that descendants are going to choose.

Obama made his choice, when he figured out his identity for himself, and when he chose who to marry, long before he filled out his census. So deal.

covered April 5, 2010 at 1:52 am

Master chess player Obama just checked “black” as a King’s Gambit opening move. Theory has shown that in order for Black to maintain the gambit pawn, he may well be forced to weaken his kingside. This is far from over.

LowerdPeninsula April 5, 2010 at 2:48 am

[re=548400]Chet Kincaid[/re]: You’re pretty bold to try and delegitimize people who view themselves as mixed race an attach and identity to that. What’s it to you if people personally choose not to formally let history and society define who they see themselves and their children as in the future? Most other Western nations have a concept of a mixed-race ethnicity, much in the same way some folks have chosen to group themselves as hispanic or latino despite their varying cultures. So long as mixed-race people don’t identify as such because they are ashmed or of one or more of their identities, they certainly don’t need your judgement. So you deal with it.

Darkness April 5, 2010 at 3:16 am

[re=548197]mollymcguire[/re]: Does that make the children in the picture macchiato?

sarcasticusername April 5, 2010 at 11:56 am

[re=548165]FlipOffResearch[/re]: would any of that “tip the scales” if he was trying to catch a cab late at night in nyc, or if he was being charged with a crime? does it “tip the scales” for the batshit teabaggers? i’m going to go with no. the man lived his life as a black man before he walked into the oval office, and he still does. wake me up when white america is eager to claim a couple of mixed race crack dealers to “their side,” because when you look at the specifics it turns out they happened to be raised by their white side.

DangerousLiberal April 5, 2010 at 12:34 pm

[re=548294]Jim89048[/re]: There goes the neighborhood.

I-man April 5, 2010 at 12:39 pm

My eyes kept showing me pictures of a black man. But I didn’t believe it until I heard it from our illustrious news media. Epic win, no?

Bella April 5, 2010 at 8:43 pm

That’s actually pretty disrespectful to his mother’s heritage, considering she raised him after his father ran off.

Chuckie Jesus April 5, 2010 at 11:35 pm

Bella: What white guy are you seeing in that picture? If he wasn’t famous, you’d grab your purse a little tighter and cross the street. He is, as Huey Freeman told Jazmine DuBois she was, “as black as Shaft in Africa”. So, *pats head*.

Bella April 6, 2010 at 1:07 am

[re=549164]Chuckie Jesus[/re]: You can answer as multiracial on the census.

Pandy April 6, 2010 at 7:40 am

[re=549199]Bella[/re]: Yes we can!

[re=549164]Chuckie Jesus[/re]: From one mutt to another … yes we did.

[re=548165]FlipOffResearch[/re]: It’s only a tie if it was a competition so … meh, no winner.

woodywood143 April 8, 2010 at 5:41 pm

what census? Who’s black? aw crap overslept again. Teabaggers must have turned my alarm clock off, so they can count me as umemployed. They will send you the census form six times and then they go ask your neighbor, why not save the postage and ask your neighbor from the git go.

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