March’s employment figures have come in and show what everyone expected: just enough jobs (162,000) were added last month to keep up with average growth in the labor force! FACT/STATISTIC: First month of positive job growth in more than two years (so pathetic). WHAT IT MEANS FOR YOUR POCKYBOOK: Everything. Money. Glory. ERIC CANTOR WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THESE NUMBERS: “Any report showing that the economy added jobs is clearly a better alternative to one showing that it lost more jobs.” INTERESTING PERSPECTIVE, BUT WRONG. [NYT]
OUR FLOURISHING ECONOMY 11:25 am April 2, 2010
You All Have Jobs And Money Now
Hola wonkerados.
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{ 24 comments }
Eric Cantor some sort of Demoncrack now?
So the “Bush Recovery” has finally kicked in? Kewl.
The animated graphic: needs moar punishing dildo mallet.
(Wait, I take that back; it has precisely the correct amount of punishing dildo mallet.)
are we just putting gifs in now for fun?
Why isn’t Fox News covering this? They’ve always been so good about reporting job reports…
This was all to be expected. A full 8% of Americans join the ranks of already existing Hobos thus increasing the demand for Hobo Beans brand beans for Hobos. Hobo Bean factory ramps up production, hires thousands of Hobos to hand wash beans. Employment numbers improve marginally.
Of course, what happens next is that the Chinese perfect their own Hobo Bean production techniques and so production by Hobo Beans, Inc. gets outsourced to Hunan, Province. More Hobos again.
That’s it. Eric Cantor should be put in charge of the economy, right now. He obviously has such a breathtaking grasp of macro-economics that John Maynard Keynes would gasp at the scope of his vision.
Wait, who has jobs and money? I have a job, but no money. Where’s the money?
Oh, when will Nobama’s Communistic Socialism kick in?
We in Tea Party think that this is BULLSHIT. I know a guy, and he doesn’t have job. So where’s his recovery? He needs a job to get insurance, dipshit. You know how tough it is without insurance? Whatever you do, don’t fucking insure him.
Any strip club showing pretend lesbians pretending to practice lesbonics on each other, behind glass, is not necessarily a better alternative to one where the poles, mirrors and floor are glazed with ladyboyjuice.
I’m gonna run down and get me one of them Census jobs, man! Yeah, that’s a real economic recovery: a non-producing, government job, lasts 2 to 6 weeks.
What a bunch of crap.
[re=547496]Cape Clod[/re]: Yes, Eric, those are truly encouraging signs about job growth. So, what say we cut the government spending for, let’s see, TEMPORARY census employment? Now, let’s remove that “over 1/3 are census jobs” from that magic fairy dust number and we get – shit, our economy still sucks!
[re=547512]GoinGreen[/re]: Oh yeah, and what about Six Flags, Sea World and the likes hiring all those hobos and out of work rapers to make sure our little darlings were safe during the spring breaks? They gonna get to keep their jobs when the parks go cold again until summer? NOPE! That number was around 2500 temp jobs here in North Texas, so nationwide, I would imagine it was quite substantial.
[re=547492]Ruhe[/re]:
Hobo Beans are mostly Hobos, kind of like like Soylent Green only delicious.
Since the US of A has the Hobo market cornered, we have nothing to fear from the Chinese… for now.
I step away for fifteen minutes to trim the fat off the brisket (ugh), and all the good “punishing dildo mallet” jokes are already taken. And I just outsourced another butcher job to myself, so, SUCK IT, AMERICA.
Do temporary Census workers get Good Friday off, with pay?
[re=547521]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: But what if the Hobo consultants the Chinese hired convince them to pursue Dirt Rocket technology? We cannot allow a Dirt Rocket Gap!
[re=547492]Ruhe[/re]: You forgot the harmonikey and bandananama production figures.
[re=547527]southern mark smith[/re]: You know, I’ve never heard it called that before.
I’m investing my new found cash in a whore diamond mine.
[re=547527]southern mark smith[/re]: oh man, the fat is the best part of brisket……
[re=547572]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Yeah, can you believe it took that long?
[re=547596]sati demise[/re]: I had to remove that really dense stuff. It still has a really nice marble, though. Happy Pesach!
[re=547516]GoinGreen[/re]: SeaWorld is in North Tejas? Who knew?
[re=547596]sati demise[/re]: [re=547617]southern mark smith[/re]: Oh, man, I’m soooo jonesing for a Reuben now. Thanks, guys.
Great, now I can pay my health insurance premium…
[re=547511]proudgrampa[/re]: Actually of the 162,000 jobs, only 48,000 were census workers. In math, that works out to mean that 114,000 non-census jobs were added, or about 19,000 more jobs than the Obama administration would be added each month this year.
I know, I know – what a bunch of facts.
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