6:25 pm March 30, 2010

Gross Old Racist Swiftboater Gives Important Endorsement To Charlie Crist

by Ken Layne

Charlie came from Miami FLA ...Pleasant moderate-Republican homosexual Charlie Crist is facing a tough primary campaign against … uh, who knows, some teabagger, Marco Rubio … hey wait a minute that sounds like a Mexican? Let’s get an old racist Swiftboater to chime in for Crist, for white (orange-skinned) Americans. Ladies and gentlemen, here’s Colonel Bud Day of Fort Walton Beach, Florida, with his opinions on the coloreds infiltrating Our Politics.

Northwest Flordia Daily News offers this delightful tale:

“You know, we just got through (electing) a politician who can run his mouth at Mach 1, a black one, and now we have a Hispanic who can run his mouth at Mach 1,” Day said. “You look at their track records and they’re both pretty gritty. Charlie has not got a gritty track record.” Day confirmed he was speaking of Obama and Rubio. “You’ve got the black one with the reading thing. He can go as fast as the speed of light and has no idea what he’s saying,” Day said. “I put Rubio in that same category, except I don’t know if he’s using one of those readers.”

Wait a minute, so the minorities are learning to read, and then using it against white illiterates? This is, frankly, an outrage.

(We know, we know, this idiot is trying and failing to come up with some kind of “word thing” that means “teleprompter,” which teabaggers have repeated more than any single word besides “socialism” since Obama was elected. Senile old racist is senile.)

Charlie Crist responded by saying he “could not be more grateful” for this old racist shitbag’s endorsement, adding that “Florida old heterosexual people should know that I am One of Them, except for the heterosexual part.” [Via Dave Weigel's Washington Independent]

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DeLand DeLakes March 30, 2010 at 6:29 pm

Hop to, O rent boys of Florida. It’s time somebody outed this Oompa-Loompa turd, and made sure he stays there.

Pithaughn March 30, 2010 at 6:29 pm

No No No! Obama is a shiftless, uppity public servant, he can’t possibly do anything at the speed of light!!

imissopus March 30, 2010 at 6:30 pm

Bud just wants his friend Charlie to continue his tanning salon visits without the tyranny of a sin tax.

Sharkey March 30, 2010 at 6:31 pm

Crist on a cracker!

S.Luggo March 30, 2010 at 6:33 pm

“… the black one …”

Colonel Bud’s been hangin’ out with Grandpa McCain a wee bit too much.

germansteel March 30, 2010 at 6:34 pm

Don’t know why people think the Republicans are racist. Can’t think of a single reason. Nope. It’s flat out communist to think they’re racist assholes.

comicbookguy March 30, 2010 at 6:35 pm

C’mon. You’re making that up. Nobody says that anymore. It’s like saying “This colored fellow, his hands are dirty, but if you look at the palm of his hand it’s less dirty.”

And people listened to this guy talk about John Kerry?

Stop. Just. Stop.

Cape Clod March 30, 2010 at 6:35 pm

Give the old racist a break will you? WALNUTS! was the only company he had for FIVE AND A HALF YEARS, ALAN!!!!!

Long Form Def Certificate March 30, 2010 at 6:36 pm

Rubio is Cuban, which in Florida is more than white enough. & Crist’s predessor, John Ellis Bush was married to a veritable Messican. They’re inclusive, down there

Don’t tell that to Little Haiti, though. They might not agree so much.

On a lighter note, though, it’s nice to see Andy Richter might be able to find work post-Tonite Show. He can make a dramatic turn as Mark Foley in the biopic.

S.Luggo March 30, 2010 at 6:36 pm

“Charlie has not got a gritty track record.”

And ANOTHER unrehearsed endorsement for KY!

comicbookguy March 30, 2010 at 6:39 pm

What Would Pat Sajak Say? If you oppose the black one who reads, and the Hispanic who talks too fast, You must be racist!

Bearbloke March 30, 2010 at 6:43 pm

Is this a pic of those two walking into a boy’s school?

Bearbloke March 30, 2010 at 6:52 pm

What happened to the Italics?

Autochthon March 30, 2010 at 6:54 pm

OK, *nice* scrollover…

Snarkalicious March 30, 2010 at 6:56 pm

What’s the over under on ‘Swiftrafted’ emerging as a new meme on Red State? Cuz I got 5 on it.

Aflac Shrugged March 30, 2010 at 7:03 pm

This is mah ballot? Geezus, Floyd, this is Florida. You’re tellin’ me that I have to choose between a homo and a beaner – on the gaddamn Republican ballot?

You can’t tell me there isn’t some leather-skinned fortyish cougar with big tits and comically named children, ready to spout platitudes at the drop of a damn hat. This pisses me off. Almost as much as all those black people monopolizin’ C-SPAN.

Deelzebub March 30, 2010 at 7:04 pm

Jumping Jesus on a fucking pogostick! Crist is so orange, his boytoy could get his recommended daily dose of vitamin C just by licking his ass once.

Holding Out for a Hero March 30, 2010 at 7:04 pm

Oh Lordy, can we take Col. Day’s Medal of Honor back?

ella March 30, 2010 at 7:08 pm

“Gritty” is code for not quite white?

St.SarahOfThePO March 30, 2010 at 7:11 pm

[re=545169]Holding Out for a Hero[/re]: You’ll have to remove it from his cold, dead neck. He likes to wear it.

BTW, I don’t think that man with Crist is Col. Day. If it is, he looks awfully good for an 85 y/o man. Or are there two Col. Days?

comicbookguy March 30, 2010 at 7:14 pm

[re=545159]Bearbloke[/re]: We got rid of all the Italics, lousy spaghetti eaters.

honkyman March 30, 2010 at 7:16 pm

hey babe
take a walk on the wild side
an all the colored girls say
oompa loompa loompa loompa doop ba doo wah
at the speed of light
no wonder you can’t comprehend em

Extemporanus March 30, 2010 at 7:18 pm

[re=545130]S.Luggo[/re]: WALNUTS! left his home in Tucson, Arizona, for some Wasilla ass.

(Also, in December 1967, Day shared a cell with Navy Lieutenant Commander and future Senator and Presidential Candidate John McCain.)

Snarkalicious March 30, 2010 at 7:20 pm

[re=545172]ella[/re]: Gritty -> Whole grain/caraway rye QED.

Crank Tango March 30, 2010 at 7:22 pm

[re=545168]Deelzebub[/re]: don’t think he hasn’t tried that angle. Don’t want your teeth to fall out from scurvy!

Godot March 30, 2010 at 7:24 pm

Oh the irony. 40 years ago, if you told Col. Day that one day he’d be endorsing Charlie, he’d have slit your throat.

Wanderlust March 30, 2010 at 7:24 pm

The reading… “thing”? Wow. I’m not witty enough to build on what was already said, but damnation. “The black one with the reading thing…” Ha! I read that and literally LOLed. And I know what literally means.

BobTheBuilder March 30, 2010 at 7:29 pm

Maybe Crist’s isn’t gritty, but I hear it smells like asparagus.

justthisonce March 30, 2010 at 7:30 pm

[re=545163]Snarkalicious[/re]: If you want, I can work up a meme proposal…

Radiotherapy March 30, 2010 at 7:31 pm

snark off
This is a battleground state for these clowns. They’ve got to figure out where the teabaggers fit in their plans. Crist is not so easy as Scazzafava to make disappear. They tried, but it looks like he has enough political support and $$$$ to stand in the teabagger’s way. It’ll be interesting.
snark on
I despise swiftboaters more than teabaggers. But that’s like saying a tooth abscess is worse than a kidney stone.

Hemp Dogbane March 30, 2010 at 7:34 pm

Day seems clean and articulate. Well, not clean. And not so articulate, but anyone could forget the word teleprompter while dissing the uppity black guy. The articulate, uppity black guy.

Whitey March 30, 2010 at 7:39 pm

Oy, vey ist mir. First thing, Fort Walton Beach. There’s no fort, and no beach. The name is fluffed up to appeal to tourist types.

Second, this area is FINO — Florida in name only. It’s Alabama, really, at its atavistic worst. Here in the Panhandle, senile racist retired military assholes are the LIBERALS, relatively speaking. Southern Baptists are the Unitarians. Hispanics are the black people, and black people are the untouchables.

Third, and it pains me dearly to say this about my Panhandle neighbors, but most deep-Southerners are as stupid as the stereotype. Brainstem stupid. And if saying that makes me a racist, well….

schvitzatura March 30, 2010 at 7:41 pm

Gold Hat from Treasure of the Sierra Madre was gritty.

Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez was gritty. And ugly.

Rubio is only ugly on the inside…

Dave J. March 30, 2010 at 7:44 pm

“The black one with the reading thing”???? I’ve always wondered what my departed grandmother would have to say about President Obama, and now I know! Thanks, old racist white dude!

Troubledog March 30, 2010 at 7:48 pm

Charlie Crist, please pardon the orca. You know what I mean. Thank you.

Extemporanus March 30, 2010 at 7:52 pm

[re=545136]Cape Clod[/re]: [re=545178]Extemporanus[/re]: Sorry — didn’t see ya in that there tiger cage, Bud!

CATX March 30, 2010 at 8:14 pm

Charlie is really floundering. The fact that he doesn’t disavow that racist moron is just sad.

Crist would probably be doing better and garner more respect if he were a) out b) running on his somewhat normal, somewhat moderate conservative record instead of making futile appeals to the knuckle-draggers.

gaswhisperer March 30, 2010 at 8:43 pm

This Bud’s not for you …

Monsieur Grumpe March 30, 2010 at 8:46 pm

You know what they say, once you go orange you… umm you… uh.

Advocatus_Diaboli March 30, 2010 at 9:15 pm

Ken – that was the alt-text win for all time!
I can barely type, I’m so rtflmao

Monsieur Grumpe March 30, 2010 at 9:19 pm

[re=545212]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]:
When you’re driving down the highway at night
And you’re feelin’ that wild turkeys bite
Don’t give Johnny Walker a ride
‘Cause Jack Black is right by your side
You might get taken to the jail house and find
You’ve been arrested for typing while blind

AKAM80TheWolf March 30, 2010 at 9:22 pm


He has to earn back some conservatard street cred for when he was being orange-gay for Obama.

sowbelly March 30, 2010 at 9:27 pm

Now just a dad blamed minute, hold on there – ain’t that feller in the picture with Crist good ole Mark Foley? I tell ya, them’s the kind cowboys you need on a long cattle trail. I ain’t got nothin gainst coloreds nor messicans ya see, just when they try to read and act important.

El Pinche March 30, 2010 at 10:15 pm

Ew..the photo makes this place smell like man-grundle.

SayItWithWookies March 30, 2010 at 10:54 pm

“You know, we just got through (electing) a politician who can run his mouth at Mach 1, a black one”
You know what else the black one can run? The fuckin’ country. The last two you voted for couldn’t run a banana stand in a women’s leper colony. So next time you got nothin’ to say, motherfucker, here’s a suggestion: do it.

Numbat Dundee March 30, 2010 at 11:00 pm

Black man speak with…tongue, read words, use verb in sentence. Black man bad. Orange man good.

Abou Diaby March 30, 2010 at 11:07 pm


I don’t think Crist is flailing at all. While Rubio enjoys the support of Jeb Bush and the south florida republicans, Crist has strong support from the crackers that run the state. These old farts are not going to allow these upstarts to take anyhting away from them when there’s a deal worth billions, between the state and U.S. sugar, for tons of polluted land in the Everglades.

obfuscator March 30, 2010 at 11:19 pm


The last two you voted for couldn’t run a banana stand in a women’s leper colony

bravo. just bravo.

i also would have accepted: “the last two you voted for couldn’t run a whorehouse during a gold rush”

Red Zeppelin March 31, 2010 at 12:08 am

(Sorry to all, been drinking) To fucktard assholes:Fuck you and the horse you rode in on! I do not even want to hear about you retarded assholes anymore. I am thinking of moving to a country called “France” or possibly “Narnia.” The thing is, I would make you eat your weapon, as I am doing intensive weight/ commando training. I can bench press twice my weight at the moment. So you fat assholes sitting on your fucking couches have no fucking chance. I also have learned some “black ops” moves, so you guys are fucking dead. Hear me? Dead!

forgracie March 31, 2010 at 12:27 am

Bud Day took a job from the Public Defender of the 1st Judicial Circuit (James Owens) in exchange for saying he were good people. Now Col. Day is triple dippin’ to the tune of about 60-70K. You kids wonderin’ why there’s no jobs for you out there? It’s because the olds won’t die…

forgracie March 31, 2010 at 12:29 am

[re=545257]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Have you thought about Jam music and pot?

Lionel Hutz Esq. March 31, 2010 at 12:32 am

Good job Florida!

And just when I thought you were going to have to give your crown to South Carolina.

imissopus March 31, 2010 at 12:34 am

[re=545252]obfuscator[/re]: Couldn’t get laid in a monkey whorehouse with a bag of bananas. Wish I had written that one.

obfuscator March 31, 2010 at 12:40 am

[re=545257]Red Zeppelin[/re]: no black ops freakout is necessary. every teabag/glenn beck/conservative racist email fwd story is good for us in the long run. that shit fires up the idiot racist base and disgusts anyone with a brain. we’ve won the past two election cycles at least in part by highlighting the insane posturings and failure of the wingnut fucktard approach to governing, from the gw/cheney desert adventures alllll the way to the most recent gop vice presidential selection. jeet kune do: use your opponent’s aggression to your advantage. let them thrash and wail against reality and obsolescence and let them die, slowly and painfully.

Mr Blifil March 31, 2010 at 12:47 am

Does Col. Bud call into C-Span a lot?

Crankenstank March 31, 2010 at 1:07 am

Col. Day is also a socialist double dipper into not one, but two, Government-run health care systems, and a serial filer of spurious nuisance lawsuits:

From the wikipoodle:

Among other endeavors, in 1996 Day filed a class action lawsuit for breach of contract against the United States government on behalf of military retirees who were stripped of their military medical care benefits at age 65 and told to apply for Medicare. Although winning the case in the district court in 2001, the judgment against the U.S. was overturned by the U.S. Court of Appeals in 2002. The U.S. Congress later redressed this situation by establishing the “TRICARE For Life” (TFL) program, which restored TRICARE military medical benefits for career military retirees over the age of 65, making the retirees eligible for both programs with Medicare as the primary payer and TRICARE as the secondary payer.

Jukesgrrl March 31, 2010 at 1:14 am

Re: the photo. Is that what politicians call a mandate?

obfuscator March 31, 2010 at 1:16 am

[re=545269]Jukesgrrl[/re]: they’re en route to the nearest video arcade or wherever the smooth tween boys hang out. ugh.

assistant/atlas March 31, 2010 at 2:23 am

[re=545139]Long Form Def Certificate[/re]: “Rubio is Cuban, which in Florida is more than white enough.”

Yeeaah, try telling that to the crackers in the Panhandle…

gurukalehuru March 31, 2010 at 3:54 am

Actually, I think a President who can read at the speed of light is a good thing.

Bearbloke March 31, 2010 at 7:13 am

I thought some of you Yanks might be awake by now…

Well, when you wake up, be sure to grab the new out-of-band update to IE8, if you use that…

In the meantime, Obama is taking a page from Bible Spice to bring you more off-shore drilling…

Drill Barry, Drill…

Johnny Zhivago March 31, 2010 at 7:56 am

he-he-he, them libruls and their fancy read-in’ machines!

Potater March 31, 2010 at 8:02 am

Harold Ford Jr. just said “speckalate” three times on the teevee. THREE AND A HALF TIMES, ALAN.

Lazy Media March 31, 2010 at 8:32 am

[re=545203]CATX[/re]: No. Southern Republicans, even Florida ones, are Different. Moderate conservatism will get you destroyed in a Southern Republican primary.

George Wallace became a hardcore seg only after losing an election in which he ran as the ’50s version of a moderate conservative. He vowed never to get “out-niggered” again, and he didn’t, until blacks started voting (at which time he became a non-racist populist again and got boatloads of black votes).

I’m afraid our little Oompa Loompa (who is about as good a Republican governor as you can find) is gonna get steamrolled. Fortunately, I think Rubio is much more beatable in a general election, assuming there’s a decent Democratic candidate in Florida. And if not, he’ll be an entertaining mess as governor and provide entertainment to the rest of us. Teabagger governments = Jesse Ventura X Sarah Palin = Fail.

TGY March 31, 2010 at 9:00 am


blkblt March 31, 2010 at 10:07 am

[re=545262]imissopus[/re]: Could screw up a wet dream

S.Luggo March 31, 2010 at 10:09 am

In My Fair Governor, doesn’t Eliza Doolittle sing, “He’s not grity, oh so gritty, but he’s ____” ?
Just asking.

M Lite March 31, 2010 at 11:21 am

To be fair, the Colonel doesn’t hate everyone of color, for he’s strongly backing the orange candidate!

Shot at Wolf March 31, 2010 at 11:42 am

Whar’s them death panulz when you needs ‘em?

Rev. Peter Lemonjello March 31, 2010 at 11:50 am

[re=545258]forgracie[/re]: Being in the court system here in Okaloosa County, I can confirm that the old troll does “work” for the PD office. He makes more money than that and literally shows up to work once a week, grabs a couple cups of coffee, shoots the shit with anyone willing to listen to the ramblings of a mental patient who eats dead flies off the window sill, then hobbles off in less than 2 hours.

Snarkalicious March 31, 2010 at 1:00 pm

[re=545257]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Did you know your avatar looks like a flaming dong?

Pop Socket March 31, 2010 at 1:12 pm

[re=545192]Whitey[/re]: Fort Walton Beach is LA – Lower Alabama.

GOPCrusher March 31, 2010 at 1:40 pm

[re=545187]Radiotherapy[/re]: Same thing here is Iowa. With Terry Branstad coming out of retirement, to run for Governor as a moderate Republican, the Teabaggers have lost their minds and are supporting Bob Vander Platts (who’s representative is the Batshyt Crazy, Steve King). In fact, earlier this week, Chuck Norris came to Iowa to publically throw his support to Vander Platts, this week. And he also has the Bible Spice endorsement wrapped up.
Hilarity ensues!

sanantonerose March 31, 2010 at 6:12 pm

Charlie has not got a gritty track

Let’s just halt right there a moment.

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