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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

Hola wonkerados.

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89 comments

  1. Texan Bulldoggette

    Funny since Pat is probably a millionaire several times over–so worried that other folks are going to get something he already has. He needs to go back to his Playboy wife & stick to educating folks about the difference between vowels & consonants.

  2. nappyduggs

    “Mr. Sajak is the host of “Wheel of Fortune”

    Mmmm. Weighty credentials, yes they are. But Chuck Woolery would never pull this crap!

  3. Marxist Leninist Papist

    Oh we don’t think you are all a bunch of racists or homophobes, Pat (though you undeniably have those types in droves). We also think your lot is filled with the historically ingnorent,war mongers, worshipers of wealth, people who don’t give a shit about the poor and the helpless, and highly credulous sheeple, all of whom are led by the nose of politicos and greedy corporations.

    Sorry for causing the misunderstanding. Because, really, its all our fault that you seem to be what you are.

  4. rocktonsammy

    Guns and Patriots?

    Where has “Human Events” been leading conservatives since 1944 to?

  5. Tommmcatt

    This turd represents the top tier of our society. Think about that for a second. Think about what he did to make that money. Then think about what a teacher makes.

    Cry me a river, Sajak. If it were up to me I’d tax you at about 90% starting around $200,000, so count your blessings and keep your mouth shut.

  6. Serolf Divad

    I hate to say it, but… don’t these fucking retards realize that their lame “Huh, huh, yuck, yuck, anyone who disagrees with Obama policies must be racist, wink, wink” crap is pure, inflammatory racist, race-baiting, angry-white-male, bullshit?

  7. GOPCrusher

    Well you know, if you claim someone is a racist because they don’t agree with the Obama Kenyan, Muslim, Socialist Agenda, then you are a racist.
    My head hurts. I need beer.

  8. Marxist Leninist Papist

    [re=545062]Tommmcatt[/re]: Here, Here ! Capitalist Protestant Work Ethic, my ass. One could count on one’s fingers the number of wealthy fucks and ruling class tards who did an ounce of productive work to deserve their riches. Society itself is already socialized, rick assholes; its all socialized together to produce all that money you blow on McMansions and whores…I mean “innovative” “entrepreneurship”

  9. Sparky McGruff

    Maybe Pat should try his hand at a late-night talk show again. We could use another pathetic disaster these days.

  10. TeddyKGB

    Did the guy who hosts a dopey game show really just criticize a former drama critic for being a former drama critic?

    But Pat’s right; conservatives aren’t racists; they’re xenophobes. They hate and fear EVERYBODY.

  11. ManchuCandidate

    [re=545070]Marxist Leninist Papist[/re]:
    Where’s my McMansion and whores? We should all demand McMansions and whores.

  12. SayItWithWookies

    Uh-oh — someone’s gonna give Chuck Norris and Victoria Jackson a run for their money.

  13. Long Form Def Certificate

    [re=545058]Hooray For Anything[/re]: He’s prolly busy trying to lay the Mack on Michelle Obama.

  14. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=545078]SayItWithWookies[/re]: and Billy Baldwin, Jon Voight, Ted Nugent, Kelsey Grammar. Hmm…do you see some kind of commonality with all these ‘famous’ people?

  15. glamourdammerung

    Is every talentless asshole in the entertainment industry (actually, being “in the industry” would imply working currently, but whatever) trying to get a gig by teabagging?

  16. ella

    What is it about being a has-been? Scott Baio is one of the biggest wingnuts on twitter. (RealScottBaio for anyone who cares)

  17. glamourdammerung

    Speaking of losers that can not work in Hollywood due to their “conservative principles” (lack of talent), I am noticing Ben Stein’s mug on the side of the page.

    Though Wonkette getting some money off that fool makes me wriggle with glee.

  18. problemwithcaring

    [re=545095]ella[/re]: [re=545092]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Obama and liberal Hollywood is to blame for all their failed acting careers and sitcoms.

  19. imissopus

    [re=545065]Serolf Divad[/re]: How dare you play the race card! Don’t you know that playing the race card on racists playing the race card in order to demonize liberals who are playing the race card is playing the race card?

  20. Texan Bulldoggette

    Also note to Pat: Wheel of Fortune is for folks too stoopid to get on Jeopardy.

  21. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=545097]El Pinche[/re]: I haven’t heard of that duo in years. That Madame puppet was one scary looking piece of wood. Lord knows what Wayland was doing to it.

  22. S.Luggo

    Pat looks just so damn cute in that HuffPo pitcher! If you bit into him, you’d get diabetes. I suggest that you start with the heart.

  23. coolcatdaddy

    Pat’s just setting himself up to take “Wheel of Fortune” to Branson when his demographic gets too old for advertisers to care about on the tee-vee.

  24. Mustang

    I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. I do not like rich white men. I do not like them on a show. I do not like them selling “Os”. I do not like them in a yacht, or being sots, or writing rot. I do not like those men at all.

  25. Pithaughn

    Hey Pat, why is the wheel colored just like them queers like, all rainbowy? You a queer, boy?

    Just thought I would throw a little bigotry back at him.

  26. ArugulaTeleprompterz

    So the Repubs have Stephen Baldwin, Jon Voight, Victoria Jackson, and Pat Sajak, and the Dems have, well, everyone else. Our team wins!

  27. Half-Price Muslin

    “…would it be too much to ask that we approach the matter based on its merits and leave the psychobabble to Dr. Phil?” Psychobabble?? Why is Mr. Vowel Movement being racist against Dr. Phil?

  28. missgrundy

    I read “The Late Shift” which was about the Leno-Letterman war for “The Tonight Show”. The author, Bill Carter, discussed how Fox tried to get into the late night talk show game. It appears that they tried to build a show with Pat Sajak, which didn’t last very long. Sajak was already the very successful host of “Wheel of Fortune” but he didn’t do a very good job because all he wanted to do was walk in and do the show and walk out. He didn’t want to really work at it.

    I guess it’s twenty years later and Sajak is many multiples of a millionaire and now he doesn’t want anyone else to have what he has. It isn’t that not wanting others to have health care makes you a racist, it is that anything that this particular president wants to do for the people who don’t have is looked upon with distrust and hatred. Just look at the Tea Party members a week ago last Sunday. They were white people who were spitting on black congressmen who were walking into the Capitol building to vote on this measure. That blatant disrespect demonstrates how low the Tea Partiers and their friends like Sajak have gone. How about speaking without screaming epithets or showing weapons? No, I guess not for this crowd. They act like children with an extreme sense of entitlement, who if they don’t get their way, proceed to have a hissy fit. How adult of them.

    And I bet you anything he considers himself a great Christian. I doubt he would recognize Christ if he came back for a visit.

  29. Lascauxcaveman

    RICH WHINY _SSHOLE IS _N _SSHOLE.

    I’ll bet even his dumbest contest_nt could solve th_t puzzle.

  30. Anonymous Office Zombie

    Wasn’t the GOP interested in grooming Sajak to be one of their next Dan Quale type running mate robots at one point and time?

    No big loss here. That Alex Trebek apparently swings Republican – now that’s disappointing.

  31. Scoops McGee

    No, Pat, I think Rich was right on the mark with his column. But don’t worry, he didn’t mean you. You’re not a racist, you’re just a wealthy cheapskate.

  32. Dashboard_Buddha

    What a dick. Sajak wouldn’t know racism if an African Lion came up and bit his shriveled excuse for a ballsack.

  33. Sparky McGruff

    Way to be topical, Pat. Next week, you can tell us what you think about the bank bailouts, or Nixon’s Anti-Ballistic Missile treaty of 1972.

  34. Georgia Burning

    Take a look at that (photoshopped?) pic of Pat on his own homepage- that’s not a human forehead. Racism may be different back on the Visitor homeworld.

  35. AKAM80TheWolf

    [re=545216]StoneAge[/re]:

    Jesus Cristo! Are all of my childhood game show hosts right-wing douchebags? I had to stop
    reading Orson Scott Card books when I found out he was a homophobic right-wing douchebag. Gah! Hold me Lord.

  36. Franklin Pierce & Pierce

    [re=545171]DC Hates Me[/re]: I should have known that Animal Mother would be a Republican.

  37. SayItWithWookies

    [re=545216]StoneAge[/re]: For what it’s worth, Alex Trebek still wears his Q-Ray bracelet — it’s visible on his right wrist at times — long after that piece of crap was forcibly removed from the market for being — um — a hunk of metal that didn’t have any of its purported magical healing powers whatsoever. Once you extrapolate from that his ability to apply the facts he knows (or ought to know), the Republican thing is less surprising.

  38. Lascauxcaveman

    Really, I love Jeopardy, and I kick some mighty Jeopardy ass at home, but more I read about Alex Trebeck, the more he seems to be a witty, urbane, well spoken, authoritative dingus.

  39. Lascauxcaveman

    It has something to do with officially being an old.

    (Christ, I am sooooo not looking forward to checking my brain at the door when I turn sixty five.)

  40. assistant/atlas

    Remember, y’all, Trebeck gets all the answers on cards, it’s Ken Jennings who’s actually the King of Jeopardy. And he’s one of the only Mormon Democrats in existence. Besides, Bob Barker rules them all anyway.

    [re=545265]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: You’re thinking of Casey Kasem. (nee Kamal Amin Kasem)

  41. schvitzatura

    Sajak should be counting his lucky stars that someone as generous as Merv Griffin considered his lame-o KNBC weatherman-ass for the job of emcee back in ’81-’83.

    The teabaggers would likely hate Griffin’s politics and gay-closeted demeanor on principle alone. But love eating pork rinds watching Wheel and Jeopardy!

  42. OhCrapIHaveACrushOnSarahPalin

    I remember that fished-eyed old f’ back when he was the weatherman on Channel 4 in Los Angeles. Once a clown…

  43. Pelagius

    Do you know how many Polish game show hosts it takes to write a column at Human Events?

    Then you must be racist.

  44. Darkness

    [re=545225]AKAM80TheWolf[/re]: I stopped reading him when it became clear he had a thing for slave rape scenes. Oh and his plotting is for shit. Man couldn’t wrap up a plot line if it emerged from his typewriter and strangled him.

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