- Sarah Palin reminds Jews of the real meaning of Passover: America, 9/11 and Support The Troops! [Weekly Standard]
- And over here we have a children’s treasury of all the mundane things Barack Obama has been constitutionally required to look at while pretending not to be bored to the max. [The Daily Dish]
- China executed more people last year than Texas and the rest of the world combined! That is serious. [Matt Yglesias]
- Barack Obama is going to tax the shit out of tampons, making it basically impossible to sex up a lady if you are a Democrat because all the ladies will hate you. [RedState]
- Intern Riley regrets he ever went to college and wishes instead that he had moved to the Moon, which is what his mother told him to do but did he listen? No, of course not, because he is stupid. [Huffington Post "College Section"]
RUMORS ON THE INTERNETS
March 30, 2010
Democrats: No Longer Able To Bribe Women With Free Abortions?
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{ 62 comments }
I’d pay to see footage of Palin attempt to say “Chag kasher V’Sameach.”
Obama was going to tax the female condom, but it turns out that no one uses those horrible things.
Why the hell is Snowbilly issuing a Passover statement? Is she someone that Jews eagerly await seasonal missives from? But isn’t it cute how the WS writer just KNOWS she wrote that herself?
Why is Sarah trying to round up all the Jews at send them to Jerusalem? She couldn’t be gettin’ a jumpstart on Armageddon, could she?
[re=544703]Hooray For Anything[/re]: She says it like anyone else would, except she adds “dontcha know” at the end.
Chanting “next year in Jerusalem” does not exactly “lift [my] American spirits”, you twat.
Riley: demand masthead real estate!
I’m going to get rich suing Intern Riley for every Moon ruble he has. I don’t know what I’m going to sue him for yet, but I’ll think of something, because this is America.
Ms Palin left out the part about the Jews being converted to Christianity so that the rapture can take her to Jesus.
Does this redstate woman get upset because Obama rammed a 2,000 page healthcare bill through her uterus? It does sound uncomfortable. I like the commenter who suggests women should not be allowed to vote on abortion issues. Classic! Keeps me coming back for more.
Didn’t Jews stop saying “Next year in Jerusalem” in 1949? And if they didn’t, what are they, retarded?
Riley, are moon rubles a fiat currency or based on the gold standard?
[re=544716]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]:
It’s all because it is easier to send out a statement than actually come into physical contact with Jews and have Seder with them, like Barry did.
That RedState article actually wasn’t as infuriating as usual; mainly because the author managed to throw out a whole long piece without once saying anything. Women will leave the Democrats because, um, there’s women leading the teabaggers (who?), and there’s the bold assertion that health reform will make birth control and tampons more expensive with no justification.
Is it just my imagination, or was Palin basically saying, “I love you, American Jews; now go back to Jewland.”
I’m sending all my kids to trade school or nursing school. Then I won’t have to worry about going bankrupt over healthcare or home repairs on my underwater home!
Okay — um — I got a question about the RedState article (I know, but I’ll summarize it here so you don’t have to click if you don’t want to). Author Tabitha Hale, in her completely inept assertion that women are fleeing the Dems for the GOP, quotes another RedState piece that states:
Because a quick search of the product classification database shows just how much women, and particularly Moms, will be punitively taxed. Tampons will be taxed; we are hereby punished not just by our monthly visitor, but because of it. Breast pumps will be taxed.
Well I’ll be — and they provide a link to the FDA’s product classification database as well, just to be on the up-and-up. So I click the linky. Here’s the FDA PCDB entry for tampons, menstrual. Nothing about taxes. Nothing about taxes on the breast pump search either. Maybe I need to spend more time looking, but I don’t see a damn thing about taxes, and even if I did, how would I know that these taxes have anything to do with the Healthcare Reform Acts?
It looks to me like another Republican female is just making shit up — there seems to be a lot of that going around.
I will not rest until all redstate links and the accounts of people who voluntarily admit against what little is left of their better judgment that they click on redstate links are made illegal.
[re=544752]tootsieroll[/re]: I wish I had sent all my kids to trade schools. Somtimes, I think the $200,000 I spent on their education would have been better spent on a custom wine cellar.
Goyem attending seders has gotten to be as fucking annoying as buying “green” shit, for the ever-so-trendily intellectually politically correct. The same people who spend all the rest of the year as proud atheists, horrified by public creches, and schadenfreuding like mad over the Pope’s bad press, suddenly, they are proudly tweeting and facebooking their seder plans and how wonderrrful spiritual nicey-nice it is. Why dontcha all go fucking join Madonna’s talmud cult and be done with it?
[re=544756]SayItWithWookies[/re]: It just so happens, I bought tampons at the grocery store this morning, so I whipped out my receipt.
It was not a taxed item.
The breast pump I couldn’t tell you for sure. I bought one, but it was 15 years ago. LOL
Buzz Aldrin went to the University of the Moon. That’s where he learned to dance. But those Moon moves he learned don’t translate so well to Earth’s oppressively Earthlike gravitational field. Consequently he dances like a very old man.
Here’s a summary of the Redstate Piece:
1) By denying health insurers the right to deny children coverage due to pre-existing conditions, they inflame the passions and rage of women with Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy, who get a lot of attention from bearing the burden of tending to uninsured sick children.
2) There are lots of very important women literally leading the Teabagger movement, even though you’ve never seen or heard from any one of them except for…
3) Sarah Palin, Sarah Palin, Sarah Palin. Just because most women think she’s insane and feel her abusive treatment of her Down Syndrome suffering stage-prop is disgusting, doesn’t mean she isn’t a net asset to the movement. After all, the GOP’s second runner up was that girl in South Carolina who drowned her kids to please her boyfriend.
The University of the Moon is full of lazy Communists who do nothing but protest the Great Patriotic Moon War! I am starting my own ecumenical university based on the writing of L. Ron Hubbard and the teachings he gave us after his triumphal return from DEATH to SMITE the unbelievers and allies of Xenu!
[re=544768]tootsieroll[/re]: Can you use one of them there breast pumps to do that new porn craze, the hootchie-pump? Makes it look like a chimp in estrus, boy howdy, its a sight.
[re=544756]SayItWithWookies[/re]:
Here’s the FDA PCDB entry for tampons, menstrual. Nothing about taxes. Nothing about taxes on the breast pump search either. Maybe I need to spend more time looking, but I don’t see a damn thing about taxes, and even if I did, how would I know that these taxes have anything to do with the Healthcare Reform Acts?
It looks to me like another Republican female is just making shit up — there seems to be a lot of that going around.
I think the thinking goes something like this:
A) Democrats want to impose taxes on tanning Salons.
B) From which we can infer that Democrats want to tax everything that is awesome.
C) Tampons are awesome (clearly… no further explanation needed)
D) From which we can infer that Democrats want to tax tampons.
[re=544703]Hooray For Anything[/re]: …you betcha. You know she couldn’t say it without a you betcha.
The next time some pol says the troops are over there so I can be over here, I’m mailing them photos of the ass dents in my parents’ couch that pre-date 9/11. We don’t need them there to keep us here – at most, we need them there to keep the Taliban from completely kicking Karzai’s ass.
[re=544777]Serolf Divad[/re]: Was that the chick whose moral-majority member, GOP official father was fucking her for all those years? That one what not only drowned her children, you left out whats the single most important part, she drowned her kids so a rich guy would marry her, and blames teh blacks. Now thats teabagger values from A to Z. Ya gots your religulous upbringing, the incest, the GOP, the adultery with the rich boss, and the killing the kids so he’d marry ya, and its even got the racism. It could only, only have happened in South Carolina. What was her name? I’m gonna make her my new avatar.
[re=544767]Prommie[/re]: I don’t blame Goyim for wanting to go to Seders– oy, the food.
[re=544737]Lazy Media[/re]: I actually like the expression “next year in Jerusalem” and say it every once in awhile. But I say it as kind of an expression of hope, like “next year when I win the lottery,” or “next year when the Giants win the World Series,” or even “next year when I have a job.” I, nor anybody else I know, uses the phrase in any sort of way to connote fealty towards Israel as suddenly demanded by cynical neo-cons and their retarded puppets. I also don’t recall the expression ever said at a Seder but I was usually too drunk at that part of it to notice.
[re=544786]Serolf Divad[/re]: Maybe they’re gonna tax tampons so everyone will have to buy Ipads?
[re=544768]tootsieroll[/re]: I just want to know why tampons are so damn expensive. Good thing they aren’t taxed or I’d be mailing a bunch to Barry & the Dems…which would be much more noteworthy than mailing toast.
Tampon Party Patriots, also. They can hang them from their hats.
OT but David Shuster just said that the crackpot Hutaree militia folks all got government-appointed lawyers. Ha ha ha ha…oh the irony is so sweet.
Other than the brisket is any of the food at a Seder that good? Can you have a good Cab Sav instead of Mano-whatcha-macallit?
There is no tampon tax. National Review manages to simultaneously inform us that, while the bill says they’ll be exempted, they surely will not be exempted.
“TAXABLE MEDICAL DEVICE…EXEMPTIONS…Any other medical device determined by the Secretary to be of a type which is generally purchased by the general public at retail for individual use.”
http://campaignspot.nationalreview.com/post/?q=MWZmYmQxNjBiMDRiY2FlNzAxMjk0ZWQ5ODJkNGU2MDA=
[re=544767]Prommie[/re]:
I find all of these new age religious voyeurs annoying. I know people who go to Passover Seders then go to Easter Mass or Midnight Mass on Christmas Eave at the Shrine of the Immaculate Conception. I’ll stick to being an Atheist that happens to know a bit of Yiddish (my dad called himself a “cultural Jew” which I think nails it). Leaves me more time on the weekends and in the evening to goof off.
Oh, and Sarah Palin? What about the ancient connection that Muslims have to Jerusalem?
[re=544767]Prommie[/re]: The only Goyim I’ve ever heard of attending seders are liberal Christians like the Obamas. Hell, the Unitarian church I used to attend had a seder service. Now, you have a lot of atheistic JEWS who show up at them, but not your goys so much.
[re=544799]Hooray For Anything[/re]: I thought it was an diaspora thing. Not “next year I’ll be in Jerusalem,” but “next year WE’LL be (back) in Jerusalem.” In that context, it makes as much sense now as bitching about the Romans.
[re=544820]PatrickS[/re]: “TAXABLE MEDICAL DEVICE…EXEMPTIONS…Any other medical device determined by the Secretary to be of a type which is generally purchased by the general public at retail for individual use.”
“Medical device?” I thought they were more of a “don’t ruin your slacks” device.
There’s some very good photoshopping on the Obama looking at awesome things site; I especially liked the Mjolnir one, seeing as it adds Barrack to the short list of the worthy. Being a nerd, I recognized each one.
[re=544820]PatrickS[/re]: RedState in making shit up shocker; there’s also the assertion that birth control prices will go up, just because.
[re=544841]betterDeadThanRed[/re]: The Muslim connection to Jerusalem doesn’t count because it’s not in the Bible; hell, the Weekly Standard blogger adds that Obama shows he hates Israel by saying they shouldn’t just kill all the Muslims in Jerusalem.
[re=544792]Prommie[/re]: The Mother of the Year’s name was Susan Smith.
The microscope picture was the best. Crouching Obama, hidden stem-cell!
I like the Obama looking at stuff better than the Kim Jong-il looking at stuff pictures. Obama looks more engaged and the stuff he’s looking at is a lot cooler.
[re=544863]Lazy Media[/re]: No, you’re right, it’s from the diaspora and more of a “we” thing than an “I” thing- should have phrased it better. What I meant is that it’s a nifty phrase what with all of it’s romantic yearning for a better time in a better place (which it was even in diaspora times) and I’ve heard people refer to it more as a poetic phrase than a somewhat more literal statement. Either way, it’s not meant as some sort of litmus test Neo-Cons are now using to determine whether or not somebody loves Israel enough.
My new band shall be named “Susan Smith’s Army.” Or “The New Susan Smith Minstrels.” Or some fucking such thing, I am doing it, this time, I have been putting off actually learning to play, and getting a band together for, what is it, 35 years, dammit, this time, I am going to do it. I will start tomorrow.
WTF? China’s more merkin than Texas?
I should know better than to click Red State. Damn you, Wonkett.
But geez, do those people know how to read ANYTHING??? Abortions won’t be 100% funded – in fact, the health care bill included a provision that no federal funds be used for abortions!
Oh and I clicked their links and, while condoms and tampons are regulated by the FDA, fail to see anywhere where they will be taxed with any special tax or rate beyond usual sales tax amounts.
Not a bit of which entices me to vote for Republicans – the ones who guaranteed that abortions won’t get federal funding and who try to render condoms completely unused by teaching such erroneous, skewed sex ed…
i still dont believe this riley kid is a real person
Funny how the WS piece predicted that liberals would take Palin’s statement seriously — how can any rational adult put any credibility into such an airhead asswipe? She’s into the right wing for the right reason — money — but has no substance beyond her talent as a golddigger: the Anna Nicole Smith of politics.
[re=544898]Prommie[/re]: I would so pay for a ticket to see a band named “The New Susan Smith Minstrels”. Where can I sign up for your fan club and newsletter?
[re=544820]PatrickS[/re]: There’s something weird about a man who immediately worries about a tax on tampons. There’s something weird about a woman who has to say “monthly visitor.” There’s something weirder about a woman who thinks “we” are “punished” by and because of our old Aunt Flow.
“And after Eve rammed the apple down Adam’s throat, the Lord thy God roared from the heavens that women were to be punished by being on the rag every two fortnights, cursed with an unwanted monthly visitor, not just because of the apple-ramming incident, but because of Aunt Flow. Ipso facto, Q.E.D., Shalom Aleichem, and also too.”
I’ll give Sister Sarah some Joo-ish. She’s a facockt fershtinkiner ferblunjit fershlugina who doesn’t know bupkes about us Jooz. In her kop she’s got gornisht, because of the giant loch in there. She’s meshugge, and I’m tired of her mishegoss. Her speeches, they are ongepotchket, and I want her to STFU about Jooz.
(The great thing about Yiddish, I hope, is that you don’t need to know the language to catch the sentiment. It’s sort of onomatopoeia-ish)
And yes, [re=544747]JMP[/re]:, I do believe she has indicated twice now that she would like us all to hurry back to Jewland. Shoo, Joo, shoo, says she.
Just to clarify: Intern Riley understands that tampons aren’t used for sexin’, right? Unless you’re Prince Charles or something.
[re=544792]Prommie[/re]: Her name is Susan Smith. For awhile she had a web page looking to correspond with folks who weren’t too judgmental.
[re=544813]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: As a lawyer I can tell you that sometimes there may be a case where you don’t care of if you lose. This one seems to have the requirements.
Riley, you had me at “lanyard.”
You know, maybe Mr.WS, the Palestinians would be less fucked up by your standers if your precious Israel acted less like a racist, colonialist prick, gave up the chauvinistic, divisive ideal of a mono-cultural “Jewish state”, and embraced the one-state solution. The Palestinians would be certainly less willing to take the Iranian money if their neighbors acted more like neighbors.
Tabitha Hale is a mole at Red State. Proof: “The bottom line is that unless the Dems find a way to stop the bleeding they’re going to pay for it in November.” Know how they’ll stop the bleeding?
Dear Sarah,
You can stop your vapid pandering to us Jews. I know you you covet our cash, and think Israel is the catalyst for the Rapture, but what they haven’t told you is we as a lot are smarter and predominantly more liberal than the average bears. Your schtick is tiresome. Go schreech at a teabagger rally, and repeat your vacuous platitudes ad nauseum to the IQ = 95 goyum who care.
Art Garfunkle
[re=544943]lawrenceofthedesert[/re]: The Anna Nicole Smith of politics? Damn, that summed it up completely. Snowbilly grifter summed in one neat phrase. Well said, and played!
Next year in Jerusalem! Where they have universal health care. Hooray!
And for everyone who checked to see if tampons are really taxed, let me say on the behalf of redstate: Ha ha! made you look!
[re=545180]comicbookguy[/re]: Keep yer gummint handz off my kotex!!1111
[re=544982]Katydid[/re]: Ah, that brings back childhood memories of family car rides. Especially of my dad yelling at other drivers. Which is how I learned my first words of Yiddish. And yes, even as a child though I didn’t know what the words meant I knew they were bad words just by their sound.
[re=544982]Katydid[/re]: Ische ga bibble?”
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