Help Rush Limbaugh Flee the Country?

  rumors on the internets
  • Watch closely as RedState concludes what health care reform is really about (Hint: commie mind control!). [RedState]
  • John Boehner is featured in a hot new will.i.am remix by DJ Librul, and Boenher’s melodic screaming doesn’t even require “the auto-tune!” [AMERICAblog]
  • Two charitable hipsters from Brooklyn want to pay a human trafficker to escort Rush Limbaugh to Mexico, which is the only place left on earth where illegal immigrants do not receive free Obamacare abortions everyday. [Washington Examiner]
  • The Secret Service (with the help of Google Trends) has reported a slight increase in the number of people who don’t want to murder Barack Obama. [Washington Whispers]

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About the author

Riley is an "internet blogger." He has written for such internet websites as True/Slant and the terrible Brangelina gossip emporium "The Huffington Post." Riley lives in northeast DC, near H Street. Maybe you do too and want to hang out?

View all articles by Riley Waggaman

Hola wonkerados.

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49 comments

  1. BlueStateLibtard

    That’s the way Boner probably screams at his wife/daughter/secretary/boy lover too.

  2. weejee

    Inter Riley, we thought you’d be malled by the baggers on the mall during the HCR live-blog. Good to see that you were doing a Boehner re-mix to whiter shade of pale brighter shade of orange.

  3. barneyfunk

    Dear RedState,

    If you hate socialism and government programs so much, why are you using the government-developed and funded Internet. The Intertubes are not just full of socialism, they ARE socialism.

    Love,

    Reality

  4. HedonismBot

    OT, but Chuck Grassley is now claiming credit for several provisions in the HCR bill. (In fairness, he played a role in inserting some provisions in the bill, until the Teabag Brigades got him all hot & bothered with the threat of a primary challenge from an even bigger wacko.)
    Funny how soon “The Democrats are trying to ram this down our throats” morphs into “I was responsible for that”, after polls show new support for the law, I mean bill.
    Too bad this won’t translate into a vote for a bill he helped create.

  5. HedonismBot

    By the way, who among you can tell me how to do that strike-thru thingie on the comments?

  6. HedonismBot

    [re=539928]HedonismBot[/re]: Nope, I was right the first time: law, not bill. Oopsies, moran & etc.

  7. weejee

    [re=539935]Joshua Norton[/re]: Ayeee! Intern Riley, my apologies. Joshua, it’s a good thing he wasn’t here over the weekend and could see what we called him then.

  8. Joshua Norton

    [re=539925]barneyfunk[/re]:

    Plus:

    No more using public schools, public libraries, national parks, highways, fire departments, police departments, Social Security, Medicare or any advances that grew out of the space program.

    Those “real” Americans can also no longer use medications or eat food that has been tested by a government agency.

    Their hypocrisy knows no limits. But you already knew that.

  9. stew

    What’s the old says? “This is what happens when cousins fuck.” Last word on the tea baggers…

  10. qwerty42

    [re=539930]HedonismBot[/re]: It is old-style html physical tag. Not all are supported. Let’s see: this this?

  11. SayItWithWookies

    I’ll give a hundred bucks to ATicketToRush.com if I get to be the person who confiscates his passport and slams the airplane door behind him after he gets on. Oh, but he’ll need that passport to get into Costa Rica. Maybe an immigration jail can detain him indefinitely like they do with hippies and such here.

  12. BeWoot

    Human trafficker will probably know this already, but Mexico has universal health care. They could sneak Rush into Costa Rica (I think it’s socialism-free) or nearly anywhere in Africa. But Mexico, like the US, is under the thumb of Stalin.

  13. Chernobyl Soup

    I live in the almost-deep-south (Arkansas) and even the wingtards (hey! iPhone recognizes “wingtards”!) are saying “oh fuck we’re in for a rude awakening come November” because we so seriously miscalculated. Yay.

  14. Dolmance

    Reading the comments on Wonkette and being inspired to write my own has affected my style and caused me to be banned from just about every political site on the Net. I think it must be some kind of plot. This is about the only place left I can vent.

  15. tcb

    [re=539945]qwerty42[/re]: The tag is strike. Like this.

    [re=539955]BeWoot[/re]: It is Costa Rica. This may be why Riley is still an intern, or it could be a postmodern ironic reference to any Spanish-speaking country. Or he could just be drunk. Again.

  16. SayItWithWookies

    [re=539945]qwerty42[/re]: It’s the strike tag — enclosed in angle brackets (less-than sign, greater-than sign). And you have to do “strike” enclosed in those brackets beforehand, then “/strike” enclosed in brackets afterwards.
    So it goes like this if it works.
    If you want to see the coding in action, the easiest way to do it is to (if you’re using Internet Explorer) right-click this page, then click on “view source” in the pop-up menu. This page entirely in rendered html will come up. Then do a find for something near what you’re looking for (find is under Edit in the menu at the top of the rendered page).

  17. give us a bob

    Help Rush Flee the Country – question mark? I think you need more !!!!!1!!!11!!!1!

  18. Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=539956]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Oh Lord, I feel sorry for you. You & my dad (who thinks Mike Huckleberry is the stupidest ass alive) are probably the only two Dems in that whole backwoods state.

  19. S.Luggo

    Mockery of Dingell’s mention of “control”? Control means discipline. So what gives? Republicans once gotz all slathery, foamy, engorged, erectile and ejactious at the sound of that word.
    Quo Vadis, Republican Party? Quo Vadis?

  20. NYNYNY

    Rush, do it for the good of the country. Go to Costa Rica. I promise we’ll all still listen to you on satelite internet x-box. And they won’t give you such a hassle about meds down there. Your show is always so much funnier when you’re “relaxed”.

  21. Berkeley Bear

    [re=539955]BeWoot[/re]: Costa Rica is where he said he’d go, but it has social care with a layer of private choice on top (i.e. what we would have if we could get a public option passed). Furriners who move there/own property have to pay into the social fund. It didn’t make sense when he said it, and still doesn’t, unless he wants to be a tax cheat in multiple countries.

    I’m really not sure where we could dump him that has no socialized medicine – Darfur? Somalia? South Ossetia, maybe (since they don’t recognize the Geogian government)?

  22. S.Luggo

    “Secret Service: Threats Against Obama Declining”
    That’s because February is the month for re-runs of Hew Haw.

  23. stew

    Republicans now want to pass a law denying Viagra to child molesters. Sorry Rush–better try Cialis.

  24. widget09

    Al Frankin was absolutly right. Rush Limpdick kind of reminds me of the Hindenburg with a big old Nazi swastica on the tail. I wish we had a time machine were we could send his big fat ass back to Nazi Germany were he belongs. I’m sure he would’nt have any complaints there, at least until they found out he was a closeted homosexual (a-la Earnst Rhome)

  25. BeWoot

    [re=539963]tcb[/re]: Oh, God. You’re suggesting I actually have to follow links before I whip out my rapieresque wit. So it’s true: life really is unfair.

  26. El Pinche

    I’m donating to AWoodChipperForRush.com. It’s guaranteed he won’t come back to US and deplete the oxytonin supply.

  27. S.Luggo

    On a less serious note, the Hannity-Rush-Beck anus of evil (in a way similar to the German National Socialist Party in the early 1930s):

    Step 1. Blares at people living pay-check-to-check and without an identity except the local evangelical church, that, due to vaguely named forces (in the case of working class Germans, the Jews, the international banks and, later, Tin-tin), that they are poor and powerless;

    Step 2: They can hear nothing else over this din and thus they believe that, because of these forces, they are poor and powerless and will become more so and Communists will kill Jesus and there will be no more Indy 500, penicillin, covered dish casseroles, NFL draft, hot wings, bail bondsmen, or church socials;

    Step 3: Profit

  28. Larry McAwful

    I was going to correct you and point out that Rush wanted to go to Costa Rica, but then I realized: Costa Rica is *in* Mexico! From the sound of it, it might be on the coast somewhere. Or is Mexico landlocked? I’d check, but I can’t remember the web address for Wikipedia.

  29. AddHomonym

    En Costa Rica hay muchas clinicas publicas, pero no hay hombres de guerra, asi: gagnar, gagnar.

  30. obfuscator

    is it realistically feasible to leave a trail of alternating twinkies and percocets between manhattan and cancun?

  31. Lascauxcaveman

    Or do this[re=539930]HedonismBot[/re], type the following characters, only don’t put spaces between them:

    whatever

    You can do bold same way, with the letter ‘b’ instead of the word ‘strike’

    and italic with the letter ‘i’ etc.

  32. Lascauxcaveman

    SHit. I am clearly wasting our time time here. But as long as I’m batting zero, I’d like to see if this works:

    whatever

  33. Lascauxcaveman

    [re=540047]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Oh bloody hell, I have no idea. Follow one o’ them linkie deals i guess?

  34. comicbookguy

    If they raise enough money and Rush refuses, he gets a donor plaque at Planned Parenthood and a nice thank you letter.

  35. qwerty42

    [re=539965]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Well … hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…
    I thought [strike] was ‘deprecated’ — well, that’s what the O’Reilly book (HTML & XHTML) seemed to say … but thanks!!! and how do you get the Arabic and Chinese characters in???

  36. Accordion-o-rama

    Regarding Rush, I’ll put a few $ toward the purchase of drugs Costa Rican official will find in his luggage.

  37. GOPCrusher

    [re=540040]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Amazing, how these Republiklans can manage to turn Tea Bagger poutrage over Socialist health care reform, into an opportunity to do a little fundraising.

Comments are closed.