stalinist sunday

Nancy Pelosi Shall Overcome, With Her Mallet

HAHAHAHAH. Nancy Pelosi loves pissing off teabaggers. Here she is linking arms with John Lewis, just like in the Selma march, to remind America of how teabaggers chanted “nigger” at John Lewis fifteen times yesterday. And if anyone gets in her way, she will smash their skulls into sandhills of calcium with her Weapon, the “1965 Medicare gavel,” forged by ancient socialist hobbits in a distant epoch, as a paean to Thor. [YouTube]

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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

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75 comments

  1. Noonan

    I feel compelled:

    Debout, les damnés de la terre
    Debout, les forçats de la faim
    La raison tonne en son cratère
    C’est l’éruption de la fin
    Du passé faisons table rase
    Foule esclave, debout, debout
    Le monde va changer de base
    Nous ne sommes rien, soyons tout
    C’est la lutte finale
    Groupons-nous, et demain
    L’Internationale
    Sera le genre humain

  2. hoosiermama

    “Sandhills of calcium.” Haha, I’m trying to imagine that and am not having too much trouble!

  3. doxastic

    Why does nice Sheila Jackson Lee want to take away my Medicare Doughnut? And Louise Slaughter is a character from a David Lynch movie (more Straight Story than Blue Velvet—but a little Blue Velvet).

  4. Mergatroyd

    On the house floor, a bit earlier, I think I just heard Marcia Blackwell say “I yell back the floor.”

  5. Marxist-Leninist Papist

    [re=535170]Noonan[/re]: No,No,No ! The French were revolutionary pansies after the Paris Commune of 1871 (968 was a cop out). The Hymn of the Revolution should be only song in the language of the Holy Mother Russia, the Great Socialist Fatherland ! Understood, you French loving Trotskyiet swine ? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCFibtD3H_k

  6. ChernobylSoup v2

    They should have given Lewis a sickle to carry alongside Nancy and her hammer just for the sport of it.

  7. Mergatroyd

    On the house floor, a little bit earlierI think I just heard Marcia Blackwell say “I yell back the floor.”

  8. Mad Brahms

    [re=535180]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: The forces of Godless Communism have this over the Bourgeois-Capitalist Dogs: their anthem is totally more suitable for large, muscular choirs and arrangements with soaring harmonies, no matter what language it’s in. Which is fitting, I suppose! The medium is the message.

  9. weejee

    [re=535170]Noonan[/re]: [re=535180]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: Not the Internationale, but the Door’s “Back Door Man.”

  10. hoosiermama

    Pre-taped C-span nonsense: Nunez (R-KKKalifornikation) says that totalitarian takeover of government caused teabaggers to yell the “n-word” at Lewis.

  11. Hunger Tallest Palin

    [re=535181]ChernobylSoup v2[/re]: They would have but security decided the danger of all those teabaggy skulls going off like claymores was too great.

  12. ChernobylSoup v2

    [re=535186]hoosiermama[/re]: Great logic. It was either that or a liberal plant, obvs. All teabaggers are racists.

  13. Mad Brahms

    [re=535191]obfuscator[/re]: Considering this is actually a pretty non-threatening, low-drama plan from a technical level, I’m pretty impressed with how well the dems have responded to the ridiculous theater of conservative outcry. Of course, you could argue that this only makes the tempest-in-a-teapot worse, but it’s still damned entertaining!

  14. doxastic

    John Boehner on the other hand, is secretly wielding the gavel used in all 4 sessions of the Congress of the Confederate States of America. States Rights!

  15. Neilist

    Somewhere in that crowd, RoscoePColtrane and JeffBArea are groping Barney Frank.

    Yes, it’s an ugly image. But we here to Tell the Truth.

    “Arise, ye prisoners of starvation . . . .!”

  16. ChernobylSoup v2

    Stupak keeps jerking like this all day he’s going to go blind AND grow hair in his palms. All during the last hour he would vote yes if Obama would sign an executive order basically saying he’d follow the law of the land. Just now, not necessarily. He’s worse than a woman.

  17. Marxist-Leninist Papist

    [re=535184]Mad Brahms[/re]: The Bourgeoisie-Capitalist Dogs have an anthem ? I thought their strategy was precisely to have no anthem, and just freeload ideologically by domesticating all that is noble, subversive, youthful, and avant-garde in culture, commodify it,and manage to make a buck off it, not to mention gain some indirect symbolic capital. I mean, thats what they did to Wagner, rock and roll, rap,..hell, almost every worthwhile cultural phenomena.

    More Snarkely, riddle me this, Brahms: What would be a suitable anthem for the Libertarian Free Market Tea baggers ?

  18. hoosiermama

    [re=535193]ChernobylSoup v2[/re]: Devin Nunes said that when there’s a totalitarian takeover people get “a little crazy.” Don’t quote me on that, but I think he’s expressing what we knew all along about these racist bastards. I would just qualify that with not just “a little crazy,” but “bat-shit crazy.”

  19. AnglRdr

    Can anybody make up a codeword bingo game? One that includes pretty much every word Devin Nunes has been using on CSPAN just now, even including the articles?

    Thanks in advance.

  20. coolcatdaddy

    Bread and circuses. Such a shame that some legislation to solve a simple problem in the US is reduced to stunts for the cameras.

    All we need are naked gladiators in the coliseum to make the decline and fall of our civilization complete.

    Come to think of it, naked gladiators aren’t such a bad idea at this point.

  21. Mad Brahms

    [re=535201]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: For the purposes of arguing, I was using “The Star-Spangled Banner”, but I suppose it *is* silly to conflate American Exceptionalism with global capitalism (Negri would keelhaul me).

    For the teabaggers, “Redneck Woman”, maybe? Honestly, the music most celebratory about freedom of self and worship of money is hip-hop, but can you really see anything ever written by a Negroe working here?

  22. spryte

    [re=535186]hoosiermama[/re]: Just watched that and wanted to kick in my TV screen. I’m from the gay part of California, we don’t like him.

  23. DustBowlBlues

    Note to liberal, mainstream God: Ignore what follows.

    If Stupak sinks this I think we should all rally in front of his house and spit at it at the same time. And yell Fuck you. Fuck you hard. Eat shit and die, etc.

  24. Mad Brahms

    [re=535202]hoosiermama[/re]: It’s true, people might get a bit crazy when there’s a totalitarian takeover. But what does that have to do with right *now*?

    Seriously does anyone even know what “totalitarian” means anymore?

  25. Marxist-Leninist Papist

    [re=535215]Mad Brahms[/re]: Can’t think of any music more in the “Classical” line ? You know, to give these mouth breathers more class. They need it.

  26. Mad Brahms

    [re=535219]DustBowlBlues[/re]: How about a “back-alley abortions on wheels” van in front of his house, instead?

  27. sati demise

    [re=535219]DustBowlBlues[/re]: sign me up if that turns out to be the case.
    We will need trains, and busses, and bikes and cars and elephants and horses and camels and sleds and go carts and atv’s, etc, et al.

  28. thesheriffisnear

    [re=535214]sati demise[/re]: I find myself strangely aroused and titallated by the thought of Nancy whipping someone good. The alternate image, I guess, is the House Speaker doing a “Gallagher” to Stupak’s head with the historic gavel which would, oddly enough, probably appeal to teabagger element.

  29. Mad Brahms

    [re=535227]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: The problem is, composers with class didn’t write songs about loving the monies. Actually, I’m hard pressed to think of any recent composers who weren’t bleeding hearts in some way, and even the more conservative ones (Mendelssohn, oh my) were just Nuts About God(tm) rather than Kill The Poor.

  30. hoosiermama

    [re=535220]Mad Brahms[/re]: You know, I kind of somnambulated through much of the Bush the Lesser’s years in office, but I don’t remember the left being as hateful; perhaps I’m wrong.

    ooh, it’s starting to get shouty on the floor.

  31. hoosiermama

    [re=535217]spryte[/re]: Watching c-span makes me realize that there are dicks in every state representing this nation (not just the dicks in my own state); it’s a good thing I don’t watch it on a regular basis or I’d go completely insane.

  32. Mad Brahms

    [re=535233]hoosiermama[/re]: It’s hard to gauge for me, honestly. There were certainly a lot of people with eye-rolling signs comparing W to Hitler, and the word fascist got thrown around a lot. It may even have been an equivalent number of *actual* protesters, which doesn’t actually say much. The difference in this round is that for some reason the media is actually giving some legitimacy to this crap; the left never had a Glenn Beck going around encouraging revolt.

  33. Jim89048

    Darrell motherfucking Issa. The man who almost single-handedly gave the workd the Governator. And car alarms.
    STFU already.

  34. JeffBarea

    Am I the only one watching the coverage to see one congressman that was so much shorter than those around him he actually could have been a hobbit?

  35. Mad Brahms

    [re=535236]hoosiermama[/re]: I’m finishing a master’s degree abroad, and trying to decide whether I want to stay in Canada for my PhD or head back to the good old u-s-of-a; maybe I should just *not watch this*

  36. Mr. Mephistopheles

    Oh great, now speaking is none other than James Sensenbrenner, the tough-talking heir to the Kotex fortune.

  37. Mad Brahms

    WTF is with Sensenbrenner’s smartass grandkid making sarcastic faces and nodding behind him? He couldn’t find any adults to cheer for him?

  38. Marxist-Leninist Papist

    [re=535241]doxastic[/re]: But you see, Wagner’s “total works of art” are very much critical of and/or are in great tension with the bourgeoisie social world which they also serve as bombastic legitimizing texts for. Even the Anti-Semitism of Wagner’s work has an anti-capitalist articulation.
    But, nuances aside, hey, if the Nazi’s could appropriate him, the Tea baggers could too, if they weren’t completely soulless, unimaginative conservatards.

  39. Mad Brahms

    Wow, now it’s really shouty, and over points of order, no less. I need to make some popcorn.

  40. spryte

    [re=535236]hoosiermama[/re]: We are indeed a nation of dicks. Maybe we should replace the stars on the flag…

  41. thesheriffisnear

    [re=535243]notanaturalblonde[/re]: We are waaay past teh gay and getting into fantasmagorical pain-pleasure fetishism. YUM.

  42. imissopus

    [re=535193]ChernobylSoup v2[/re]: Or no one got it on tape so there is no proof that it happened.

  43. Rosemaryrules

    Jim – i thought you said “Peen to Thor”. That would have been better. Does she hammer all over this land?

  44. notanaturalblonde

    [re=535388]nightshift[/re]: [url=http://www.hulu.com/watch/4264/saturday-night-live-nancy-pelosi]Palomino! Palomino![/url]

  45. Mad Brahms

    [re=535319]sanantonerose[/re]: I don’t think you quite underst- wait, did you say salmon croquettes?

  46. RoscoePColtraine

    [re=535197]Neilist[/re]: Ah, Nells….may I call you ‘Nells’? I’m not much of a groper, that was HVAC flunkee Jeff, remember? Groping doesn’t include activities we do with our mouths, does it? No? Then I’m definitely not a groper.

  47. Easter Lemming

    The latest right propaganda machine biggovernment.com claims that all the reports of racial and homosexual epithets and spitting are media fabrications. To prove it they have a video tape showing a brief segment where there are no racial slurs.

  48. Jess Sayin

    You couldn’t just say “the N word”
    You had to type out the whole word?

    Are you effin’ kidding?

    Did you do that with the F word?

    Would you do that with the C word, used to insult women?

    No?

    Then what’s YOUR real reasoning for that?

    I’ll give you a hint. It’s the R word. Just a liberal form of it.

    You’re pathetic, too. Just not as pathetic as the Tea Partiers, but pathetically parallel in your gut.

  49. nick a name

    SPITTING, NAME CALLING, HATRED, MAD, SAD, CRYING, SCRATCHING KICKING AND SCREAMING. BOY ARE THOSE TEA BAGGERS LIKE LITTLE CHILDREN/WHEN THEY CAN’T HAVE THEIR WAY. SO, SAD TO SEE CHILDREN ACT LIKE THIS, WHO RAISED THEM?

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