socialism saturday

Goodbye ‘Deem And Pass,’ It Was Fun Knowing What You Were For Five Days

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Peggington at a crossroadsAmerica is saved from Democrats! The House Rules Committee, after a contentious meeting in its chamber above the River Styx, has consulted with the leadership and will not go ahead with “deem and pass,” or as Peggy Noonan’s nightmares call it, DEMON PASS. Instead the House will “take three votes Sunday: first, on a resolution that will set the terms of debate; second, on a package of amendments to the Senate bill that have been demanded by House members; and third, on the Senate bill itself.”

This is probably a good move, since Democrats are completely incapable of explaining obscure but legal procedural moves to the media. It also saves the bill from being locked up in courts for the next ten years! Ha ha, if only. Obviously Republicans will file 100 lawsuits against the Democrats’ five-day consideration of “deem and pass.” TORT REFORM NOW!

Meanwhile, phew:

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) on Saturday rejected an offer to hold a separate vote on abortion provisions in the sweeping health-care legislation, setting the stage for the final talks with the last Democratic holdouts.

Pelosi told reporters that she rejected the solution offered by Rep. Bart Stupak (Mich.), the leading antiabortion Democrat who proposed passing separate, strict language that would clarify that no federal funds in the proposed legislation could go toward abortion coverage.

The American people will not stand for Nancy Pelosi’s “Baltimore hardball politics.”

[Washington Post]

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About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell


Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • doxastic

    She will fuck you up, hon

  • NJB

    At last – someone thought of the children.

  • hotdog

    Styx? They haven’t had a good song in 30 years.

  • smellyal8r

    “Demon Pass’ was what that idiotic Bret Baier kept throwing at Obama on Faux News the other night. Like Obama knew or cared about House processes. I think it also means something else to teh geyz, but I’m not sure (and I’m gey).

  • Neilist

    Speaking of Ante-Bellum Ruins: How much bourbon has gone down Dame Peggington’s gullet, washed “unvexed unto the sea”?

  • Lucidamente

    Oh Lady Noonington, time for another gin and tonic (though from the looks of that photo, she’s had quite a few already).

  • Troubledog

    Nancy Pelosi touched weeners with her cousin.

  • Marxist-Leninist Papist

    I actually thought that Demon Pass sounded kinda catchy and…enticing. Enticing like sin. Plus it would be a FU to the holier than thou conservative worshipers of white capitalist Jesus. But NOO, where going to get this done the boring, more obviously legal way. Depressing.

  • Mergatroyd

    I am carrying my laptop around the house like a ventriloquist’s dummy, so I won’t miss a word of this!

  • Oldskool

    St Marys kicked Villanova’s ass. Haha. Nuns rule.

  • gurukalehuru

    By avoiding Demon Pass, will they have to confront the remnats in the woods?

  • Lucidamente

    [re=534703]Neilist[/re]: Methinks Dame Peggington would secretly like some Hebrew National Wiener down the gullet.

  • thesheriffisnear

    MMMMMMMM sausage

  • obfuscator

    it looks like peggington is contemplating a very satisfying flatulation.

  • lochnessmonster

    So Nancy is saying they have enough votes without Stupak?

  • Come here a minute

    Take that back about Speaker Pelosi. She plays San Francisco gay politics!

  • Jim Newell

    [re=534717]lochnessmonster[/re]: I think they need to run the table with about 10 more, if they want to avoid stupak. Hopefully dropping deem and pass helps.

  • DustBowlBlues

    BTW–So I have don’t have to look it up, what’s the vote count now? More importantly, what does Nate Silver say?

  • weejee

    Demon Pass? Isn’t that what conserbatives call pooping. They all wear knickers six sizes too small so that they only shit once in the biblical seven years. That’s why they all are so grouchie and combative.

  • Lucidamente

    Bart Stupak = A spark butt

  • Jim Newell

    Actually, it looks like they will just get Obama to say “Abortion is bad,” in a letter, to give the Stupaks a way to save face.

  • weejee

    [re=534726]Jim Newell[/re]: Well Barry should be about on his way to the hill meeting with the demtards ’bout now. Can you peek out your basement casement and see if the motorcade is rolling?

  • obfuscator

    [re=534727]weejee[/re]: he’s there now… the caucus circle jerk is live on the c-span.

  • weejee

    Went to Faux Gnews to see their spin, clicked on the live-coverage clickie and guess what ad popped-up? One for the Bulldawg high through-put shredder.

    Hoyer just announced Barry to the Caucus to major hoot & holler

  • hoosiermama

    [re=534728]obfuscator[/re]: Thanks, my ears were melting from the drivel on ceespanII

  • Marxist-Leninist Papist

    Speaking in my capacity as a Catholic (of sorts): It really should be clear to all opponents of abortion that they ought to fight the winnable good fight for those already born instead of using the lives of the unborn as culture-war bomb to sabotage health care for their fellow human beings.Either they have a really narrow conception of what constitutes “living” (only fetuses) or they are cynically using this as a cloak for their disdain for “handouts” and “big government”.

    Or their just angry that we have yet to incinerate the heathen Persians. “Life”, for the conservative mind, is a complex thing indeed.

  • Come here a minute
  • obfuscator

    [re=534734]Come here a minute[/re]: he just quoted lincoln… i think he just told the members that it’s imperative to pass this thing, november results be damned.

  • Jim Newell

    [re=534734]Come here a minute[/re]: he is making fun of people. WHERE IS THE CLASS.

  • Come here a minute

    [re=534737]Jim Newell[/re]: YAY — calls out CONCERN TROLLS.

  • thesheriffisnear

    [re=534734]Come here a minute[/re]: When he gets the Negro preacher cadence going the repukes know they in trouble. NGUYEN!!!

  • weejee

    Mmmmmm, Faux News has Barry on a 3-second delay compared to ceespan. Paper shredders as lead-in ads, tape delays, sounds like redaction to me.

  • imissopus

    [re=534734]Come here a minute[/re]: WHEREZ THE TELEPROMPTERZ??

  • obfuscator

    [re=534738]Come here a minute[/re]: this is what they’re really concerned about…

  • Lucidamente

    [re=534740]weejee[/re]: The delay gives Shep Smith time to change his freshly soiled pants.

  • hoosiermama

    I have Barry on one tab and Wonkette on the other — Saturday afternoon could not get any better. Oh wait, maybe a frosty beer would help. Be right back.

  • obfuscator

    [re=534737]Jim Newell[/re]: barry’s playing the dozens in that ivy league negro dialect. shameful.

  • thesheriffisnear

    [re=534742]obfuscator[/re]: Why do you alwayz have to play the Mandingo card?!?!

  • Jukesgrrl

    MSNBC has interrupted its usual weekend crime and prison festival to bring us Hopey’s address to Congress. But apparently nobody told DirecTV. When their program-title banner is put on the screen, the words that unfurl right over the President’s head: “The Santa Strangler.”

    I hate to see what FOX’s might say. On purpose.

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    I think I’m falling in love all over again with Barry. He should have been doing this for the past year.

  • RPolanski

    What’s all this fuss about Demon Puss? Everybody knows that Dame Peggy already has one of those betwixt her thighs. She’s just a real dirty girl. Expeshully after a couple of Bourbon shooters. What? What? Demon Pass? That’s different. Never Mind.

    E. Litella.

  • progressiveinga

    They gettin’ crunk up in da House!

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    I got 4 tickets to the Palin/Bachmann Love Fest in Minneapolis today. Any suggestions on what to do with them other than go to the charade?

  • hoosiermama

    That’s right! Grow a spine Dems and git r done — Barry commands it!

  • Lucidamente

    [re=534747]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Speaking of MSNBC, what is Monday’s Morning Joe gonna look like after this?

  • obfuscator

    [re=534747]Jukesgrrl[/re]: msnbc breaking news: obama reveals plans to include santa panels in democratic health care reform legislation!!

    fox news banner: obama to murder christmas!!!1!

  • El Pinche

    Today we’re all Dennis De Young.

  • Lucidamente

    [re=534751]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Give ’em to the drunkest frat boys you can find.

  • obfuscator

    [re=534746]thesheriffisnear[/re]: maybe the mandingo killed your unborn baby!!

  • Chernobyl Soup

    My God he’s in tune with what’s going on. Unreal.

  • obfuscator

    awwww he just high-fived the little kid growing out of nancy pelosi’s rib cage.

  • hoosiermama

    Woot! Damn, Pelosi was clutching on Bammers saying, “Hi-5 this random child I brought in with me!”

  • thesheriffisnear

    [re=534757]obfuscator[/re]: Mandingos don’t kill babies they steal ur blonde gurlfriend.

  • weejee

    Barry did not say the A word. Stewpid Stupack is dousing himself with gasoline and searching for matches.

  • NJB

    [re=534763]weejee[/re]: Handing Stupie a lighter, “Here you go, ya Papist fuckstick”

  • gurukalehuru

    [re=534751]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: OMG, that’s today?! March Madness, indeed.

  • sati demise

    sheeesh Wonkette, no live blogging of the Obama speech to the House?
    s.l.a.c.k.e.r.s. how do you get under the couch? my dog cant even do that and he only weighs 27 lbs.

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    [re=534758]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Isn’t it odd that he thinks a pols job is to actually enact legislation that positively effects the majority & not to always be thinking about re-election, K Street, hookers & blow?

  • hoosiermama

    I don’t know what’s better with c-span, Barry’s speech or the crazy old repubs from Florida screaming on the caller lines.

  • Marxist-Leninist Papist

    [re=534764]NJB[/re]: Laugh all you want, but have some pity for the chump, some real “Papist fucksticks” are going to offer his electoral head on a proper alter to their bigoted, ignorant God. Hell, the Catholic lobby is probably going to take out a quite a few Dems from their seats. Considering the Dems were formerly the party for us motley peddlers of poppery, we are such ingrates (historically speaking).

  • Lucidamente

    [re=534768]hoosiermama[/re]: Plus the moderator saying “go ahead, caller” and managing not to say “you fucking wingnut retard”

  • NJB

    [re=534768]hoosiermama[/re]: “Stop killing those little babiezz!!! They might all be Presinit someday” (hic)

  • weejee

    [re=534767]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Well it’s a disconnect like small biz folks and the Chamber of Commerze. As a small biz owner, who does BTW pay for med/dent for our most important resource our employees, I’d join the fucking Klan before I’d join the ChamberPot cause it’s so full of shit including being against health care reform. Pooling small biz so they can purchase employee health insurance at the same rate as the goliaths is bad????? WTF????

  • hoosiermama

    [re=534770]Lucidamente[/re]: [re=534772]NJB[/re]: I noticed that the republicans were all cranky blowhards and the dems were all, “we need this, that’s all.”

  • hoosiermama

    C-span dos: Slaughter was closing up and Virginia Foxx tried to ask a question and Slaughter swatted her down. Oh wait, now Foxx is talking to an empty room anyway. What a wad.

  • weejee

    [re=534769]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: Not all of us who were rapped on the knuckles by Sister Caligula so as not to write with that heathen left hand will follow the direction of the lobby or the pulpit. Opus Dei and the Bishops would not had done bugger all about the buggering if those blessed pinko trial lawyers hadn’t shoved some serious settlements up their collective ass.

  • Zadig

    [re=534772]NJB[/re]: “Ma’am, have you seen the quality of most presidents? We’re doing the world a favor.”

  • Marxist-Leninist Papist

    [re=534787]weejee[/re]: Agreed. The Church can and must be saved from the Church. It has to be, or were not only allowing our own Church to be screwed by itself, we are helping the (often very Protestant) radical libertarians and bigots conquer America (again).

  • Chernobyl Soup

    [re=534775]weejee[/re]: Small businesses are to the Chamber what poor rednecks are to the Republican Party. Suckers.

  • NJB

    [re=534777]hoosiermama[/re]: I noticed that the Republicans all sounded like they’d been pulling at the jug handle really early in the day.

  • NJB

    [re=534769]Marxist-Leninist Papist[/re]: I don’t understand – Stupak just spent the last six months being the Flaming Sword of Jehovah to save the little snowflake babies. Why would Catholic lobbyists turn on him after that?

    I think more likely the voters of his district won’t really like him holding up health care reform to grandstand on his pet agenda. At least some of them won’t like it, anyway – particularly since everything he’s said about the bill is a lie.

    Connie whatsername could knee-cap him in the primaries too. But as far as pity for this pitiless weasel, forget that. I think he’s a schmuck and deserves to have his ass handed to him – and I really don’t care who brings him down.

  • Potater

    Go, Peter DeFazio, kick ass!

  • BarackMyWorld

    Speaking of Stupak’s amendment…Rick Santorum said on Fox News a little while ago that this bill was gonna cause 400,000 abortions, and that his source was Planned Parenthood, in a segment devoted to making abortion the red herring of the moment.

  • blkblt

    [re=534751]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: pictures please

  • weejee

    [re=534798]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Exactly!

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    Nope. April 7th.
    I’m a tolerant kind of a guy but I’m not sure I could that much stupid.

  • Wingnutia

    I just read through the entirety of Dame Pegginton..or should I say damn Pegginton’s uh, declarations. I just love when a wingnut who gets annoyed when anyone presses a Republican, ever..of any position thinks that little blowhard Brett Baier was doing a public service. I suppose this goes to what we now expect of our media, a partisan and rather haughty exchange with President Obama where Baier kept inserting Republican propaganda as substance and treated the president like some thug beneath his fox news ass (oh wait, guess I’ll remove the word “like”, it is fox and Obama is a black democrat who has a higher position than any white man) is now considered an “informative interview”. It’s all well and good to be suspicious of the president’s policies (fox was NEVER rude or pressed bush of course on anything) or any politician for that matter but, of course Fox has it’s well known and well worn reputation of massaging and giving Republicans handjobs while treating Democrats like interlopers. Anyway, after reading the column I’ll say Mdme. is her usual haughty and bitchy self, is it worth it to pass health reform? Let’s step out of the abstract and into reality: You’re goddamn right a hit to approval is worth it to just begin to address this titanic clusterfuck we call American healthcare.

    Yes, this is a bad bill and yes, the Democrats could have done a lot better but when you consider that it’s been over a fucking century that we’ve been fighting about this broken system which right now is so bad off that it WILL collapse within 10 years if left alone. Of course we arrived at this point because during the rare time over the past 100 years when wingnut Republicans actually address health care they make sure the corporations get their due and power and we pay for it either in taxes or higher premiums. When Democrats and even some moderate Republicans over this century of American healthcare have made ambitious attempts to fix the system the entrenched interests in the system and their paid for whores have put a quick end to it by any means necessary. What makes me laugh is that Republicans are still allowed, even on shows like “Hardball” where “communist” Tweety McYellingstone is supposed to be a balancing device, they STILL get away with the “government bureacrat” between “you and your doctor” claim without ever being forced to admit insurance companies already HAVE bureacrats squarely stuck between you and your doctor. Anyway, I know I’m writing a long comment here, but I just periodically get sick of the shit sandwich that we call the American media.

    Oh and let that elitist bitch mdme. Nooner get some liver disease from all her massive intake of booze and pills so that she can MAYBE experience recision because it’s not “cost effective” either explicitly or implicitly for some money grubbing insurance company to cover a middle aged old pickled egg like her when she can be let go for a couple years before Medicare, the evil government insurance kicks in. Then let her smug wrinkled Reaganite ass know what a pre-existing condition really means and then MAYBE we can ask her if she still thinks it’s not fucking worth it to address this horrible, horrible system after all. Of course by then she’d be dead and her greedy, racist and indifferent Neo-Confederate party would be celebrating the courageous action of the insurer not to cover her old ass any more because she’s not cost-plus; thus the world goes round.

  • Surfeit O’Hubris

    What Wingnutia said.

  • smellyal8r

    [re=534863]Wingnutia[/re]: Good. Yes. Right on.

  • rocktonsammy

    Seems to be way to much hubbub for our nation to help those who need help and to stop these thieving bastard insurance companies.

    Its still about our President is black also.

  • smellyal8r

    I just went back and watched Obama’s speech to the House Ds. Any true Democrat in that room who votes “no” tomorrow needs to have their membership card in the party taken away and destroyed. He’s right. If you came to DC to do something, anything, that you can be proud of, voting yes on this bill is it. If the only reason you are in the House is to protect the unborn, you might want to re-read your Catholic tenets again — it’s about the poor, stupid. The downtrodden, the sick, the needy and the hungry. Jesus himself never mentioned the unborn (or teh geyz, but that’s another matter). When a group of nuns tells you it’s OK to vote yes, I’d run to the floor and push the green button. Let no Republican vote yes so they can all be painted with the same brush — the party of NO. THAT speech needs to be played for every High School Civics Class by Presidential Decree before the end of this school year.

  • JeffBarea

    [re=534863]Wingnutia[/re]: I don’t like you.

    I don’t know whether it is because you write blocks of text that look like cheese or whether your writing style annoys me.

    I don’t care.

    Remember 3 words: Blind-side

    Don’t ever run for office. Don’t ever do anything at this point. Improve your writing and I may reconsider the 4 words I just said.

    No one likes a bad writer after all.

  • Mr Blifil

    [re=534817]BarackMyWorld[/re]: 400,000 abortions. Per minute I think he forgot to say. Maybe he was too distracted by the fist dildo in his ass to apply the appropriate degree of crazy to his made up shit.

  • smellyal8r

    [re=534917]Mr Blifil[/re]: Now THAT’S funny. Rick is such a douche. I’m glad the good people of PA had the sense to call him home.

  • imissopus

    [re=534916]JeffBarea[/re]: And who the fuck are you?

  • ladymacbeth

    [re=534763]weejee[/re]: putting out the fire with gasoline.

    yeah i love tarantino.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    [re=534977]imissopus[/re]: What? You’ve never heard of JeffBarea, Writing Critic Extraordinaire? He knows his writing UP. He knows his writing DOWN, he knows his writing ALL around! He knows BAD writing when he see’s it, and bravely calls it out without a pause of hesitation. HE DA MAN! (And a laydeez-man too.)

    “Oh, Jeffie, come to bed.”

    “I can’t baby, this is important. Someone’s expressing an opinion on the internet… and their writing is…bad!”

  • imissopus

    [re=535007]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Oh, THAT JeffBarea. Well then, carry on.

  • Rosemaryrules

    I’m just going to look on the bright side. I’m pushing 50 and if I keep drinking the way I do I’ll be dead soon.

  • nightshift

    Is it just me or is HRM Dame Noonington starting to look like the Cryptkeeper’s girlfriend?