DAILY BRIEFING  9:30 am March 11, 2010

Sugar Plum Fairy Came and Hit the Streets

by Ken Layne

  • Nancy Pelosi was alerted when Eric Massa was trying to bone one of Barney Frank’s male staffers seven months ago, but she did nothing because she was too busy doing nothing in Congress. [Washington Post]
  • Republicans and Democrats have nominated the House Democrats and Republicans to be targeted by tens of millions of dollars in Hate Ads this campaign season. [Fox News]
  • Infamous Ohio video blogger Tim Russo is running for local office! [Tim Russo]
  • Bedbugs are ruining the finest New York apartments, and also bleeding those people to death. [New York Times]
  • Cute white lesbian high-schoolers are the new minority Mississippi hates so much … so much that the school canceled the prom! [OnTop/USA Today]
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tootsieroll March 11, 2010 at 9:44 am

“Down on your knees again”

I’ll see you’re Lou Reed and raise you one Echo and the Bunnyman

JMP March 11, 2010 at 9:47 am

Those damn lesbians, forcing the school to cancel its prom just because it had enacted backwards rules that violated their rights. At least the school is urging the parents to organize their own prom, just like many others (and quite possibly this one) did when those activists lawyers forced them to admin negroes to their dances.

Mr Blifil March 11, 2010 at 9:47 am

I suppose at this point it would be bad form to point out that Massa has already resigned his office, while diaper-shitting prostitute-addicted David Vitter and cuckolding extortion-paying gynohound John Ensign are still comfortably ensconced in their sinecures with nary a peep from the vaunted fourth estate.

Yeah, sorry, I’ll drop it now.

Prommie March 11, 2010 at 9:49 am

She is 18, so I am allowed to drool and maintain the faint hope that young people, they experiment with many things during the process of discovering who they are, and she may yet turn out to be a LUG.

FlownOver March 11, 2010 at 9:50 am

“Itawamba Agricultural High School?” With a name that gay how can they be opposed to Lesbian Prom Nite?

DC Hates Me March 11, 2010 at 9:52 am

Bedbugs; the reason why NYC is known as the city that never sleeps.

ManchuCandidate March 11, 2010 at 9:54 am

Ahhhh GOPer equivalency attempt but major fail at maths and law.

20+ year olds > 16 year olds
20+ year olds > age of consent

But then again, considering the string of GOPer sexytime messes, I think they feel that age is of no matter.

PineyWoodster March 11, 2010 at 9:54 am

I like the USA Today version of the story better because the picture of the nice Lesbian girl shows her gay hotness better.

magic titty March 11, 2010 at 9:55 am

I thought lesbians were the good kind of gays? Oh but I guess it’s still cool if a feller brings his little sister as his date, right Mississippi?

weejee March 11, 2010 at 9:58 am

So following WaPo logic, if we all text Katharine Weymouth that David Broder is trying to bone George Will she’s playing cover-up if she does immediately get an story out above the fold/footer the “…the WaPo has been notified that…Broder…Will…drop-the-soap…” Gheezhus, merry, and joesuff.

queeraselvis v 2.0 March 11, 2010 at 9:58 am

Yay Mississippi! #1 in the nation in producing backwards-ass bigots. Suck it, South Carolina.

pondscum March 11, 2010 at 9:59 am

Back in the dark ages we used to go to school dances in same-sex groups and no one thought a thing about it. And we wore pants. I’m so confused…

queeraselvis v 2.0 March 11, 2010 at 10:00 am

[re=528519]magic titty[/re]: Or livestock. Because cows need dates too.

JMP March 11, 2010 at 10:06 am

[re=528517]ManchuCandidate[/re]: And of course, they forced Massa to resign before the stories became public, which is a little different than covering the whole thing up until people find out what’s been going on.

Once again, Democratic sex scandals are always a bigger deal than Republican ones, because Democrats are always talking about how they love family values and condemning other people for their sex lives, so Democrats are huge hypocrites when they don’t live up to those professed values.

Oh wait, I got that backwards. It’s because the media does whatever the GOP tells it to.

President Beeblebrox March 11, 2010 at 10:10 am

It’ll all be OK. The cute lesbian senior will graduate and go to Sarah Lawrence or Evergreen State and never have to think again of the rancid piece of excrement of a state that is Mississippi.

rafflesinc March 11, 2010 at 10:11 am

[re=528521]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: [re=528524]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: [re=528519]magic titty[/re]: The school posted the prom memo on their website.

# Each Junior/Senior may invite one guest. Your guest should meet the following criteria:

* may be in grade 9 or 10 at IAHS
* may be in grade 9 – 12 at another high school
* may be a college age student
* must be of the opposite sex

Oh hey, no requirement that the guest not be blood-related and a human.


snideinplainsight March 11, 2010 at 10:16 am

[re=528533]rafflesinc[/re]: Says nothing here about bringing a Wookie -

snideinplainsight March 11, 2010 at 10:17 am

And guns, of course, are still A-OK!

Way Cool Larry March 11, 2010 at 10:18 am

So some congressional aides went from Frank to Massa? Maybe they were looking for some fresh action?

Prommie March 11, 2010 at 10:18 am

[re=528535]snideinplainsight[/re]: Or a bigfoot.

PsycGirl March 11, 2010 at 10:19 am

According to WaPo: “Racalto was concerned that the lunch followed a pattern by Massa…of trying to spend time alone with young gay men with no ostensible work purpose.”
You just know the GOP leadership, behind closed doors, is all “Isn’t that cute? He was taking the guys OUT TO LUNCH! Boy, what a closet novice! A Republican would have them backed against a wall in an alley somewhere with a dog collar and a leash”.

Way Cool Larry March 11, 2010 at 10:20 am

What’s a LUG????

Capitol Hillbilly March 11, 2010 at 10:21 am

Ms. Pelosi said she was “tickled pink” about the news, sources said.

[re=528531]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Agnes Scott.

Guppy06 March 11, 2010 at 10:21 am

So… Pelosi went to the Denny Hastert School of Legislative Leadership?

rafflesinc March 11, 2010 at 10:25 am

[re=528547]Way Cool Larry[/re]: Lesbian Until Graduation


queeraselvis v 2.0 March 11, 2010 at 10:28 am

[re=528533]rafflesinc[/re]: Apparently this isn’t the first time Itawamba Ag H.S. has had some gender trouble.

Naked Bunny with a Whip March 11, 2010 at 10:30 am

Due to the distractions to the educational process

It’s a prom, dickweed, not Trigonometry class.

the district canceled the prom, saying it hoped “that private citizens will organize an event for the juniors and seniors.”

I’m sure local motels will be pleased to step up to the plate.

McDuff March 11, 2010 at 10:31 am

[re=528512]Mr Blifil[/re]: “ensconced in their sinecures”

I pledge to work that phrase into as many conversations as I can today here at Rancho Ensconso.

WadISay March 11, 2010 at 10:34 am

So, next time you check in to the Waldorf-Astoria and they ask if you would like to have a little cocksucker in your bed…think!

the problem child March 11, 2010 at 10:38 am

[re=528531]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Let’s hope so. She is a straight A honour student, according to the school’s website.

forgracie March 11, 2010 at 10:39 am

Lookin’ for soul food and a place to eat….

Sorry, couldn’t let that pass.

“Is there gas in the car?
Yes there’s gas in the car…”

stew March 11, 2010 at 10:39 am

In fairness to ‘Ole Miss, you can bring your sister, your cousin or your uncle Zebb to the prom, as long as your mother-who-is-only-13-years-older-than-you grants consent.

donner_froh March 11, 2010 at 10:54 am

[re=528558]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Who would have thought that a place that looks like a gravel pit would be so close to the cutting edge of gender awareness?

Mr Blifil March 11, 2010 at 11:06 am

[re=528556]rafflesinc[/re]: Better a LUG than a MUD (Masturbate Until Doomsday)…

DangerousLiberal March 11, 2010 at 11:07 am

[re=528511]JMP[/re]: Exactly. It’s a lot like when the schools, parks, pools, etc. just stone shut down rather than admit the coloreds.

Also, “Itawamba Agricultural High School (IAHS) prom.” Wasn’t this a short story by Faulkner? Or, in this case, Flannery O’Connor might make more sense. Or perhaps it’s just the punch line of some joke.

Nim, ham hock of liberty March 11, 2010 at 11:08 am

Due to the distractions to the educational process

“If we let teh gay into the prom, the mouthbreathers will burn our offices down. If we don’t, we’re gonna get sued and who the hell wants to deal with that headache. So we’re just gonna pussy out and punt.”

queeraselvis v 2.0 March 11, 2010 at 11:13 am

[re=528596]donner_froh[/re]: Hey, we’re talking rural Mississippi here (I know, potatoe/potahtoe). It’s a toss-up between gender dissidence or fucking your sister/mother/father/pig.

Snarkalicious March 11, 2010 at 12:00 pm

[re=528524]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: ‘Hogging’ also, too.

proudgrampa March 11, 2010 at 12:05 pm

[re=528518]PineyWoodster[/re]: Agreed. She’s definitely a cutie!

JMP March 11, 2010 at 12:14 pm

[re=528611]DangerousLiberal[/re]: Yep, or the Catholic’s recent idea to drop all adoption services and employee spousal benefits rather than possibly helping the gays.

Or Oklahoma, trying to make it impossible for the Feds to investigate hate crimes, in fears that the gays might be affected:
To be fair, they probably think of the effect on investigations of hate crimes against racial and religious minorities as a benefit.

InfiniteMonkey March 11, 2010 at 12:20 pm

[re=528547]Way Cool Larry[/re]: Lesbian Until Graduation.

steverino247 March 11, 2010 at 12:39 pm

“A bunch of kids at school are really going to hate me for this.”

Yeah, that’s the idea, honey. Hate. “It’s all your fault and the ACLU is trying to shove their gay agenda down our throats.”

But the good news is you can study hard, get a law degree, join the FBI or the DOJ and then get some really sweet payback on those crackers.

snideinplainsight March 11, 2010 at 1:17 pm

George Will in WashPo today;

The increasingly puerile spectacle of presidential State of the Union addresses is indicative of the state of the union and is unnecessary: The Constitution requires only that the president “shall from time to time give to the Congress information of the state of the union.”

I’d like just to point out that it wasn’t a puerile spectacle when he was giving W standing ovations there for having invaded Iraq. Fracker. Just like the census, things that were just 16 months ago bedrock foundations of American life (shoveling money at US corporations and Wall St, basketball, beer, gardening, fixing potholes, you-name-it) are all part of some nameless, all-encompassing socialist plot after they are even glancingly associated with Obama.

Imagine if some lefty blogger had loudly proclaimed that the State of the Union address was unnecessary and puerile, in the middle of the previous administration. Imagine for one second the red-faced blowhards who would all come galloping out of the red-state wilderness, blathering about tradition historical significance, transparency, blah blah blah.

Hey George! Obama uses toothpaste! He rides in a car! He wears underwear! He has a bank account! He uses deodorant! He sleeps in a bed, and lives in a house! He talks on a phone! He goes to a doctor when he’s sick! He takes aspirin when he has a headache. When he’s hungry, he eats food! I really think you should avoid all of those things from here on out, George, because they’re clearly part of a left-wing conspiracy. Seriously.

pondscum March 11, 2010 at 1:19 pm

[re=528749]steverino247[/re]: I love the way you think.

Gumboz1953 March 11, 2010 at 1:26 pm

The same Prom Gestapo probably wouldn’t care if the girls all got together in a bedroom, in their pajamas (or not), talked about boys, painted each others’ toenails and whacked each other with pillows until they all collapsed in a giggling, writhing mass on the bed.

Or maybe they would.

DangerousLiberal March 11, 2010 at 2:00 pm

[re=528819]Gumboz1953[/re]: That’s hawt.

Accordion-o-rama March 11, 2010 at 2:39 pm

[re=528807]snideinplainsight[/re]: No SOTU stunt can really compare with W’s commercial plug for Baby Einstein in 2007. I can picture him in a few more years:

“Hi, I’m George W. Bush. America need to think about the future, and that means life insurance. If you died today, how would your family cope? Would your wife be turning tricks to put food on the table? Picture it, little Jimmy comes down to breakfast and there she is chugging down a big, black cock. You don’t want that. Buy Mutual Life today.”

steverino247 March 11, 2010 at 2:57 pm

[re=528809]pondscum[/re]: Why, thank you! I figure you just need to adjust your aim a bit and take the whole fucking state down instead of some dinky rural Mississippi high school. Our young DOJ lawyer walks into the Federal Courthouse in Shithole, MS with five bankboxes full of paper with “You’re fucked, Mississippi” printed on every line of every sheet of pleading paper. “If it please the Court (because it sure pleases me)…”

Long Form Def Certificate March 11, 2010 at 10:28 pm

[re=528556]rafflesinc[/re]: As exemplified best by the ONION College Issue story re-print titled “Lesbianism ends abruptly mid-junior year”.

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