Liveblogging Hollywood's Special Election, 'The Oscar Movies'
What do you think of when you think of a night of very special Movie Magic, when the Stars Come Out, in the night? What else could anyone be thinking about, but the feature-film industry's special Valentine to Earth, "The Oscar(TM) Movie Awards," which appears on teevee tonight all over the world except in New Jersey, Connecticut and New York, because whatever channels there that show The Oscar(TM) Movies have been shut off by the Government. Anyway, who will win? The movie with the blue things vs. the Hobbits, or the one where Sandra Bullock plays her own twin, Sandra Day O'Connor?
Think of all the movies that have been nominated, which is an honor! Have you seen one of them? Was it "really good," and did it make you feel fat? That's the magic of Hollywood! Now, let's get to it, what with the lists and categories, and titles and names and such.
6: 13 PM -- Is it on yet?
6: 14 PM -- We don't know! This is a blog to make fun of politics, we do not watch the Movie Awards. We are going out to dinner.
6: 14 PM -- And that wraps up tonight's Entertainment Coverage. (We hear that the Awl is actually liveblogging it for real.)