CIVIL RIGHTS IS OVER  12:20 pm February 26, 2010

Beloved Symbol of Hope, David Paterson, Officially Quits Campaign

by Ken Layne

He shall be released.Haha, we almost put “Officially Quits Race” in the headline, but how can a civil rights leader and symbol of hope/change such as David Paterson quit his own race? Anyway, so much for the dream, the dream of America’s first blind black governor. Just 11 months ago, America gathered around its communal browser and held hands and cried, just a little, as it seemed the nation’s old wounds had finally healed in the form of this wonderful man and his magical, appointed-by-somebody rise to the highest office in … Albany. But now it’s over, collapsed in a pile of cocaine and whores and thuggish sidekicks, as so many New York political/entertainment careers have collapsed.

What the tabloids reported has become “oh right we’ll say it too” truth, via the New York Times: Paterson had dropped out, forever, and Harold Ford can finally be president of NYC, with Julia Allison as his Snow Queen. [New York Times]

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Buzz Feedback February 26, 2010 at 12:25 pm

The Ma’am looks pensive/troubled/disgusted in every picture with her and Sammy Davis Patterson.

Sparky McGruff February 26, 2010 at 12:26 pm

That’s a fascinating photo. One look at his wife’s face, and it’s clear that she knows it’s not going to end well.

Cape Clod February 26, 2010 at 12:28 pm

Given that he is black, blind and has seen his share of hardship and cruelty at the hands of others, I predict that Patterson will rightly find an excellent second career as a blues singer.

Snookums February 26, 2010 at 12:29 pm

Paterson should have taken some lessons from Willie Brown. Now there was a black politician who could keep his cocaine, whores and thuggish sidekicks out of the public eye.

Snarkalicious February 26, 2010 at 12:30 pm

Spitzer/Patterson ’12?

rubybuckaroo February 26, 2010 at 12:30 pm

Just proves that even a blind man can have a roving eye.

bitchincamaro February 26, 2010 at 12:31 pm

I quit my race a long time ago. The fat, stupid, white one.

Lucidamente February 26, 2010 at 12:31 pm

Why is Anna Deavere Smith standing next to the governor: is she researching a new one-woman show?

FlownOver February 26, 2010 at 12:32 pm

… and Fred Armisen wept.

SlouchingTowardsWasilla February 26, 2010 at 12:32 pm

So unfair. How was he supposed to know they were thugs without being able to see their dark skin, silver teeth, and droopy drawers?

bhosp February 26, 2010 at 12:37 pm

[re=520721]SlouchingTowardsWasilla[/re]: Pants on the Ground?

DustBowlBlues February 26, 2010 at 12:38 pm

Important news flash! OK City Community College–someone saw shooter on campus. Authorities have school in shut down as students wage epic gun battles. (This IS Oklahoma–everyone’s carrying.)

One Yield Regular February 26, 2010 at 12:41 pm

Is it time to rename New York “New New Jersey”?

JMP February 26, 2010 at 12:42 pm

I can’t see why he’d quit right now.

Red Zeppelin February 26, 2010 at 12:45 pm

[re=520712]Snookums[/re]: And he knew how to slap a bitch when she needed it.

SayItWithWookies February 26, 2010 at 12:46 pm

This is a pretty lightweight reason to quit, considering what other NY politicians have done — I can only infer that he’s got a bunch more stuff in the closet and figured he’d get out before the NYT started getting too many leads. Or else he’s just in over his head and this was a good opportunity. Or else he’s thinking of moving to Nevada, where the governor can do just about anything as long as he doesn’t say you’re blowing your money when you go to Las Vegas.

nappyduggs February 26, 2010 at 12:47 pm

“but how can a civil rights leader and symbol of hope/change such as David Paterson quit his own race?”

‘Splains how Mike Steele got away widit.

Lascauxcaveman February 26, 2010 at 12:49 pm

[re=520711]Cape Clod[/re]: Heh.

chaste everywhere February 26, 2010 at 12:51 pm

[re=520711]Cape Clod[/re]: You’re more hopeful for the cat than I am. I keep picturing the old Callahan cartoon of the guy on the corner with a cup in his hand and a sign that says “Black and blind but not musical.”

Lascauxcaveman February 26, 2010 at 12:54 pm

OK that last didn’t work too well. How does one post a link to one’s own, previous, especially brilliant comment on an earlier thread? One that goes straight to the comment, not the top of the page; I’ve seen it done here before but I don’t know how it works.

germansteel February 26, 2010 at 1:01 pm

Charlie Rangel’s seat in Congress is starting to look promising – and by “promising” I mean “open.” They don’t mind electing Paterson’s type there, apparently.

SayItWithWookies February 26, 2010 at 1:01 pm

[re=520745]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Click on the datestamp of the comment you want to link to. The top of your comments says:
Lascauxcaveman says at #12:54 pm, February 26th, 2010# – Reply
it’s the part I put between the #s. In Internet Explorer you can right-click that link, click “Properties” on the pop-up menu, and it’ll give you the URL that you can then cut and paste without having to actually load the page.

An Outhouse February 26, 2010 at 1:08 pm

Black, blind, and according to unsourced anonymous rumors from the NY Times, a swinger! Somebody didn’t kiss somebody’s ass, or was doing somebody’s wife. Albany and NYC did not appreciate Mr. Paterson at all.

Limeylizzie February 26, 2010 at 1:09 pm

[re=520716]rubybuckaroo[/re]: win

memzilla February 26, 2010 at 1:17 pm

Appropriately enough for February, Gov. Paterson will himself soon become Black History.

V572625694 February 26, 2010 at 1:23 pm

[re=520729]DustBowlBlues[/re]: I love the “related stories” list I found in one Google News search. This is higher education in Amurrica:

* One injured in Northern Illinois University shooting (Update) – Feb 19, 2010
* University of South Florida in Tampa on lockdown – Jul 25, 2009
* University At Buffalo Raises Gunman Scare – Feb 17, 2010
* Gunman arrested during USF Lockdown saga – Oct 06, 2009
* Lockdown after Florida Atlantic University shooting – Jul 25, 2009
* University of Miami lockdown after reported shooting – Nov 21, 2009
* Suspect arrested in the Florida University armed intruder case – Oct 06, 2009
* Trinity College Lock-down Lifted – Oct 23, 2009
* IGNOU setting up new institute of education in Nagaland – Feb 21, 2010
* One injured in Northern Illinois University shooting – Feb 19, 2010

Lascauxcaveman February 26, 2010 at 1:27 pm

[re=520748]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Thank you.

eclecticbrotha February 26, 2010 at 1:28 pm

Gonna miss the only good impression Fred Armisen ever had.

Bowdoin February 26, 2010 at 1:42 pm

Wait a minute, you can indeed Leave Your Race! Sammy Davis Jr did it, to become Jewish. And Bob Dylan left his, to make room. I read it in Rolling Stone, so I know.

Bowdoin February 26, 2010 at 1:44 pm

[re=520747]germansteel[/re]: Charlie Rangel will become Charlie’s Angels. He’ll win by simple typo.

smellyal8r February 26, 2010 at 1:49 pm

I blame this whole mess on Eliot Spitzer and I’m sure he won’t even be mentioned. Paterson seems like a nice enough guy and he was probably having a fine State Senate career. But it always comes down to these guys who everyone’s trying to “help”. Paterson and Spitzer and now Paterson and this guy who hits chicks (and also had a couple drug busts on his rap sheet). Also, I wonder what Kerry Kennedy is going to drop off at the NY Post once her ex husband announces for Governor? Hell, Pataki ought to come back and just say he’s going to run NY State as “viscount” for four years and get the mess straightened out (and, yes, I’m a Democrat).

slavojzizek February 26, 2010 at 2:13 pm

Ha ha, remember when the Muslim Joe Stalin in Washington said about a year ago, ‘I decree that David Paterson shall no longer be king of New York’, and Paterson was like ‘I’ll do what I want’? Amazed it took this long to get rid of him.

DustBowlBlues February 26, 2010 at 2:18 pm

[re=520806]V572625694[/re]: Good to know that dumb okies have a lot of company. Speaking of dumb okies, a sweet lab-looking pup wandered up to my house today. Beautiful shiny black coat and scared–another dumpee. Now to decide if we adopt or have him euthanized. (We don’t need no stinkin’ dog shelters here in the country).

I don’t care if the ACLU revokes my membership: if I ever catch on of the sons a’bitches who dump animals, I intend to buy a gun and exercise my Second Amendment rights on his ‘nads.

bureaucrap February 26, 2010 at 2:25 pm

[re=520806]V572625694[/re]: If you can’t kill people at school, where CAN you kill them?

bureaucrap February 26, 2010 at 2:27 pm

In the future, everyone will be governor of New York for 15 minutes.

According to the schedule, it’s my turn on August 10, 2053, from 2:00-2:15 pm.

arewethereyet February 26, 2010 at 2:34 pm

Wait…he’s blind? Yes? How in the fuck does he know whats goin on?

nappyduggs February 26, 2010 at 2:44 pm


I lerve you for that.

DustBowlBlues February 26, 2010 at 3:20 pm

[re=520942]nappyduggs[/re]: I need a clarification on that. Do you lurve me for adopting a stray dog, or for being willing to shoot some redneck’s in his ballz?

smellyal8r February 26, 2010 at 3:31 pm

[re=520989]DustBowlBlues[/re]: I pray nappy loves you for both reasons.

Heq February 26, 2010 at 4:10 pm

Fuck you Andrew Cuomo. Fuck you for destroying the financial system, and here’s a heaping helping of advanced fuck you for when you are governor and try to run for president on the basis that you’re an asshole.

GOPCrusher February 26, 2010 at 4:38 pm

A hundred years from now, historians will look back on the Paterson Administration with great indifference.

Fred Wertham Jr. February 26, 2010 at 7:25 pm

[re=520712]Snookums[/re]: And nobody has been running California since Willie Brown was term-limited out.

zhubajie March 1, 2010 at 1:44 am

[re=520729]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Will they wipe each other out? That might be a good thing.

zhubajie March 1, 2010 at 1:52 am

[re=520716]rubybuckaroo[/re]: Roving hands?

zhubajie March 1, 2010 at 2:22 am

[re=520806]V572625694[/re]: Somehow they missed the U. of Alabama Tenure Committee Massacre!

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