Harold Ford Junior is being awful again, this time on the website Blogspot.com, a popular day-trading lunch diner. He is upset that Kirsten Gillibrand will not release her tax returns, only because Kirsten Gillibrand demanded he release his tax returns, which are terrifying and not in the State of New York. Harold’s Logic: Maybe if I ever run for office in New York then I will, you evil tobacco lady from Poopland.
Where are the tax returns from New York’s unelected Senator from when she worked as a tobacco lawyer?
Did she file and pay her taxes while making big bucks as the cigarette industry’s lawyer?
No one knows. The unelected Senator, who shows great hypocrisy on taxes, wants me to release my tax returns, but she won’t release hers. I will gladly release my returns when I run for or serve in office again. That’s what honest politicians do.
Ha ha ha. But you are running for office, Harold! That’s why she’s asking you! You may not know it, but that’s what you’re doing: running for office.
And you’ve got to love the hilarious “when I run for or serve in office again.” Golly, can anyone imagine what Harold Ford’s excuse for delaying the release of his tax returns will be when he officially declares his candidacy, through the election?
As for Kirsten Gillibrand, who cares if she was a lawyer for Big Tobacco? What a ’90s thing, “Big Tobacco.” This was a big thing in the 1990s, when our greatest problem as a nation was how to stop the kids from smoking cigarettes. Big Tobacco was our greatest lobbying fear. We cared so much about the sway cigarette companies had over the government. Let’s return to those days, what with the jobs and disposable income and smaller Internet!
Ford: Tobacco and Taxes [Harold Ford Junior via Gawker]
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He’ll release his tax returns as soon as his accountant finds them. Hey, it’s not easy keeping track of tax filings for all fifty states just in case an elective position opens up somewhere.
Yeah… How is a website called (Your Name) For New York equal to NOT running for office? I need a smoke…
I would be willing to laugh uproarously about Harold “Call me sometime” Ford if not for the awfulness of Gillibrand as a candidate (not to mention, as a Senator).
Jeeeezus, I wouldn’t vote for anyone who approved of that typeface. Watch Tron much, dingus?
Smaller internet? But back then Rule 34 didn’t apply! How can I live in a world in which there is no porn extant showing Kit from Knight Rider having sex with a gay unicorn?
Is Ford’s “campaign” really just performance art?
First Howard Stern drops out of running for Governor because he didn’t want to release his tax returns, now Harold Ford won’t release his; New York’s tax release rules seem to have strange effects on would-be politicians with oddly similar names.
Jesus Christ.
Robocop is so gonna kick Jr.’s ass when he finds out he stole his font.
“Your move, non-senator creep.”
also, I got a lot of ass in the 90′s. Can we go back to that too?
[re=516442]DangerousLiberal[/re]: [re=516449]Extemporanus[/re]: DAMN YOU MASTER CONTROL!
[re=516449]Extemporanus[/re]: That font’s actually from Batman Forever, which is about a thousand times gayer than another thing that is gay.
[re=516446]JMP[/re]: Harold Ford is King of All Senate Races.
what’s with the Batman Forever font?
[re=516447]Jim89048[/re]: How dare be so insensitive and offensive? Anyone who’s read the Bible knows Jesus liked to get drunk off wine, not beer!
I truly wish I lived in New York so I could vote for Harold many times. I mean someone has to represent those poor downtrodden Wall Street zillionaires that everyone keeps picking on – and Ford is their hand-picked guy for the job.
[re=516453]Godless Liberal[/re]: Not true; it was still a million times less gay than Batman and Robin; remember the nippled Batsuit.
[re=516459]JMP[/re]: It was the cigarrette/tobacco reference, you see.
As a lawyer for big tobacco, Ms. Gillibrand is the perfect person to represent Manhattan.
[re=516457]weeping_eagle[/re]: [re=516453]Godless Liberal[/re]: How did you kids know that?
Is Glenn Beck writing his talking points?
“Did she kill six million cigarette smoking Jews when she worked for Hitler Cigarettes? Nobody knows, because she won’t tell us!”
“Did she blow six guys at a Nicks game in 1994? Nobody knows, because she wont tell us! One thing is certain.. She didn’t say she didn’t.”
“What does she think about the Terminator font on my blog? NOBODY KNOWS, BECAUSE SHE REFUSES TO SAY.”
[re=516465]Jim89048[/re]: That’s Goober Jesus the first frontman for lynyrd skynyrd, right?
And he had to have a “garage plate”.. That’s like “Lambert Field”. Way to slum with the locals, carpetshitter! (Really, he will probably have to shit on the carpet after having a garbage plate).
[re=516480]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: goddammit my mom lives in rochester and i have still never had a garbage plate yet. I suck.
The Teabaggers have proof that Harold Ford filed taxes in Nigeria in 1963.
That graphic design reminds me of Robocop. That is all.
[re=516452]Extemporanus[/re]: Win on the RoboCop font, though. I knew it looked familiar, and now, to my horror, I know why.
[re=516440]germansteel[/re]:
Hey, Gillibrand’s done a surprisingly good job ! OK, maybe there’s something a little Tracy Flick-ish (Flick-esque ?) about her, but as long as she’s solidly pro-choice & public option, I’m happy to support her, especially considering we might’ve had to listen to, like, Caroline Kennedy ’til like, the next, um, election…
[re=516447]Jim89048[/re]: Depicting Jesus mellowing with beer and a cig is not accurate.
They should show him mellowing with wine and a prostitute.
I think Henry Ford would make a very good senator. True, he’s no friend to the Jews, but at least he believes in paying a working stiff enough to buy a Toyota. ‘course Toyotas ain’t what they used to be.
[re=516457]weeping_eagle[/re]: That’s what I was thinking. Is Joel Schumacher running his campaign? Will there be rubber nipples at some point?
[re=516481]Crank Tango[/re]: You take some baked beans, or some fucking home fries, top it with some bullshit– You’ve got a garbage plate!
[re=516445]qwerty42[/re]: oh man I hope so!
[re=516497]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: hehehe yeah I cook like that when I am high. But growing up in Buffalo, the garbage plate was something of legend. I promise to go there next time I am home.
[re=516492]Accordion-o-rama[/re]: Accurate depiction or no, the thing here is, it’s in a textbook, and the Texas Board of Education needs to get right on this, pronto!
[re=516453]Godless Liberal[/re]: [re=516457]weeping_eagle[/re]: You’ve just undone a decade’s worth of psychotherapy aimed at helping me repress memories of that incredibly traumatic bat-type.
Which means there’s only one thing left for me to do…BATDANCE!
[re=516463]JMP[/re]: The superheroic cocksucking really didn’t help much, either. [HOLY NSFW, BATMAN!]
[re=516490]DangerousLiberal[/re]: [re=516487]Dumptruck[/re]: SEE ABOVE
[re=516500]Crank Tango[/re]: That’s like not having a cheesesteak when in Philly (where I grew up). Promise me you will do this and report back to me, brave culinary soldier.
[re=516459]JMP[/re]: Wait ’til they get a load of Martini Jesus!
[re=516505]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: i would die a thousand deaths before I’d fail you. Also did you ever go to paddy’s pub?
I have an idea for what Sen. Gillibrand should do with that shotgun she keeps under her bed. This guy is such an ass.
[re=516453]Godless Liberal[/re]: [re=516457]weeping_eagle[/re]: You’ve just undone a decade’s worth of psychotherapy aimed at helping me repress memories of that incredibly traumatic bat-type.
Which means there’s only one thing left for me to do…BATDANCE!
[re=516463]JMP[/re]: The superheroic cocksucking really didn’t help much, either. [HOLY NSFW BATMAN!]
[re=516490]DangerousLiberal[/re]: [re=516487]Dumptruck[/re]: SEE ABOVE
[re=516511]Extemporanus[/re]: I’m sorry if this comment appears more than once. I think the first one I submitted is stuck in moderation for being too batgay.
When will a decent candidate (I’m looking at you, Weiner (no not Juli)) step in and save us from these two semi-people. (OK, fine, one semi-person and one way-too-conservative-to-represent-NY person.)
What do you have agaisnt Juli? I would vote for her.
Wut?
[re=516511]Extemporanus[/re]: somehow the prince video was gayer than batman actually blowing robin.
I do him, but only if he promised to not to speak.
[re=516507]Crank Tango[/re]: Never went to Paddy’s, but I used to frequent the Glinch and Frank’s in the early ’90s. A few years before that, there was this Italian deli Brocco’s that used to sell 40′s to underage kids–sometimes they’d have this cop that would ‘talk’ to old man Brocco behind the counter as he was selling the shit to us.. Fuck, I’m an old drunk.
[re=516506]blinky_twinkie[/re]: Now that’s my Saviour! You just know Jeebus’ Martini would have gin and not vodka.
Ok here we go again. I respectfully disagree, Wonkette. This is the same type of post you ran against Terry McAuliffe. Fact is, if democrats in Virginia had put up a real candidate, instead of a greenhorn who just pandered to rednecks in Southwest who weren’t gonna vote for him anyway, Virginia would have a democratic governor. He may have been a carpet bagger but he had a record of winning, he didn’t try to disown his democratic credentials, and he would have had enough sense to campaign in Northern VA.
So just think about that when you post this stuff about Harold Ford Jr. So he’s carpet bagger politician etc etc etc- BUT HE MIGHT ACTUALLY HAVE THE INTENTION OF WINNING AN ELECTION AND THUS BE ABLE TO WIN THAT ELECTION. Quite a rarified quality in democratic candidates these days (vis Martha Coakley, Creigh Deeds)
[re=516527]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: LOL me too, only i quit drinking a few years back. and i’ve almost lost all the weight I put on afterward too!
The font IS weird. Look at how the K’s and the R’s have dicks hanging down off of them. What is Harold trying to tell us, subliminally?
[re=516446]JMP[/re]: Remember the days when old Magoo flashed his wife’s returns while she was slipping out of a limo with no underwear? Can’t say he wasn’t all full disclosure.
Harold Ford is just setting himself up to be able to say “Whatevs, Kirsten, I wasn’t even TRYING!” when he loses the primary.
[re=516542]Crank Tango[/re]: That’s evident in your avatar–sexy!
My Terminator font Google alert just blew up . Damn you Ford, you damned RINO.
[re=516534]Marilyn[/re]: Yeah, but real common sense Democrats just don’t throw around Terminator fonts like they were nothing. Don’t you read the Constitution?
[re=516511]Extemporanus[/re]: Hahaha ooooooh you got me. It says NSFW, but it didn’t say NSFMC (Not Safe for My Cock).
With that kind of font, Harry should be in a Starfleet uniform.
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I think that font was also used on Escape From New York.
OT/
Olympic Women’s Curling.
Mr. Fatale: “Curling is so boring, that I wouldn’t even watch it if it was in the nude.”
i have to say and in general, the east coast just pisses me off.
[re=516579]sfjhku[/re]:
I want 12 gross ribbed condoms to keep my lady happy.
I know she’s waiting
just anticipating
the thing that she’ll never, never possess
http://tinyurl.com/y8rjm35
[re=516598]ladymacbeth[/re]: Needs more Proposition 13.
I’m sorry, I may be confused, but is Harold Ford running for Batman?
The Harold Ford jr. hate cracks me up. It seems like certain media outlets realllly hate this guy for doing the exact same thing that Hillary Rodham Clinton did, which is realize a bigger future awaits in a state that would actually be willing to elect a woman or black man.
I happen to live in Memphis. The Fords are our dirty south equivalent of the Kennedys and they are much reviled – except for this guy. When he was in office he honestly seemed to care for his constituents. I know that sounds like BS but Harold’s office intervened in a matter in which the MPD violated my constitutional rights.
Seriously! Long time Wonkette lurker (been a reader since the original wonk!) and I finally registered to defend the guy.
[re=516613]Meidisconnect[/re]: But his reverse carpetbaggeristic tendencies are wearing thin and grating on the nerves. Make Ford live up in Thendara/Ha-De-Ron-Dah for a couple years, to get the real “taste” of New York State.
[re=516599]S.Luggo[/re]: Forbidden
You don’t have permission to access /media/goldberg.jpg on this server
No real Murrikkkan should have to put up with this.
I awoke to the news that “Romney touched Rapper first.” Today will be a good day.
[re=516579]sfjhku[/re]: Yeah, gimme some of them “Oakey” sunglasses. Got a Jethro Bodine rope belt to go with ‘em? Better yet, why don’t we send the IRS to have a chat with you kids? Just to make sure all your paperwork is in order.
[re=516586]Servo[/re]: This is good news for John Carpenter.
[re=516440]germansteel[/re]: Don’t get it – what’s your major problem with Kirsten? I think she’s doing fine.
[re=516593]DemmeFatale[/re]: No way! Curling is exciting and full strategy and skill!
[re=516534]Marilyn[/re]: There may be plenty of precedent for getting behind a Democratic carpetbagger, especially here in NY (see Clinton, Hillary Rodham). I concede that pragmatism at the ballot box is sometimes the better part of valor, but what part of “Merrill Lynch buttboy and bankster shill” do you not quite understand? I’ll hold my nose and vote for the fat and boring upstater when the time comes. No valor, just sick of the moneyed, entitled, oligarchs.
[re=516613]Meidisconnect[/re]: Sorry, I didn’t see your post before penning my little rant. Welcome to the funhouse.
Poopland? Is that near Shitsville?
Whew, what stinques around here?
What about the little known provision in the Constitution that specifies anyone who has dated Julia Allison is not eligible for any office of trust or profit under the United States?
[re=516534]Marilyn[/re]: [re=516613]Meidisconnect[/re]: For my money, if he wanted to pry a senators out of his seat he should have started with toothless old Mitch McConnell in KY.
[re=516560]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: I only wish I had the style, grace, and looks of Mr. Furley!
[re=516641]peggynooner[/re]: Gotta love it. That might shut down the Freepers who sniff Sara’s panties, but the quote might get lost in the shuffle…
On another note–when did Derek Jeter run for office?
Off topic, but Al Haig just walked into Hell and told the Devil, “I’m in control here!”
[re=516534]Marilyn[/re]: Yes, and the “real candidate” was Brian Moran, who was poking the same holes in Deeds that McDonnell later used. Terry McAuliffe would have been fucked with the same stick as Deeds, just from the other end. The real mistake was made by the WaPo in endorsing Deeds instead of Moran as a protest against Halfwit Pirate Terry.
[re=516534]Marilyn[/re]: But Ford lost.
Has Harold ever met Sally? He can Mandingo her dusty partz, then help smother her senile trophy-husband. Talk about the new power couple!
Speaking of brown people, where the fuck is Bobby Jindal? They had some straw poll at CPAC and Ron Paul won, but not a single mulatto kenyan muslin on the candidate list. I guess they shoved Bobby into Cheney’s man-sized safe in the mean time.
[re=516649]Crank Tango[/re]: Yes, we all know Don Knotts was a very handsome nervous man.. Likewise, I wish I had the diaper and moxie of Smoking Baby!
[re=516511]Extemporanus[/re]:
Batman’s single now, and he’s taken up a new hobby NSFW
[re=516672]AKAM80TheWolf[/re]:
Gah, I’m retarded (satire, it’s ok). http://i.imgur.com/Pff3v.jpg
^ That link is NSFW.
[re=516671]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll be in diapers soon!
I demand to know why there has not been a post on Obama’s naked communist mother yet?? And you consider yourself a real news site…. for shame.
http://blingee.com/blingee/view/107781648-Blingee
Are you people blind? That’s Alex Rodriguez. Harold Ford is not from New York!
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