About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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Hola wonkerados.

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  1. AbstinenceOnly Ed

    Just when you think Lindsey Graham is so full of cum he couldn’t cram in another drop, there he goes like a hose.

  2. Doglessliberal

    very oral? I’d hope so if he is going to blow someone. Unless he has some method I don’t know about.

  3. Joshua Norton

    You just KNEW it had to be Du Pont Circle. I’m amazed there’s room to move with these pervs in town.

  4. freakishlystrong

    By “Latin” does he mean Marco Rubio? The only other one there is K.Lopez. Reeechhhh…God, I’ fucking dry heaving in my cube. shit.

  5. JMP

    Are gay guys in their 20s/30s ever interested in a guy in their 50s unless there’s money involved? That’s the only way straight relationships with that kind of an age gap work.

  6. Smoke Filled Roommate

    [re=515465]gogoguerilla[/re]: Normally he just sucks and fucks on his front steps, but this time he wanted it to be different. Special.

  7. Jukesgrrl

    Which Wonkette commenter filed this? I hope one who has a camera strategically placed at his front door.

    And I love it when a guy in his fifties — gay or straight — couldn’t possibly be interested in someone who is not 15 years younger. If HE can’t stand to look at wrinkles and cellulite, why should a 20 year old want to see it? And yet he’d turn away a 20 year old if the volunteer’s skin is darker than … is that mocha, mochachino, caramel, skim latte … please be more specific.

  8. JMP

    [re=515516]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Hmm, I’ve always wondered about the Log Cabin Republicans; this could explain it. Gay people can be racist, too, and maybe some hate black people so much that they’ll join a party that also hates them just to get in on the hate.

  9. sezme

    How do you “be white, or latin”? Is this some sort of costume you can slip on like George Washington? or Dick Cheney’s human form?

  10. miquonranger03

    Oh no, Dick Cheney’s trawling for a new sexmate! And he’s planning to vampirize him!
    Dick Cheney: proof that not all vampires are sexy.

  11. Monsieur Grumpe

    Sounds like a vacuum cleaner salesman. He’s probably got a deal on some special attachments.

  12. Bearbloke

    [re=515581]vagabonding[/re]: Packed with what – self-loathing CPACers? Where’s the GodHatesFags crew when one needs them?

  13. Jukesgrrl

    [re=515521]JMP[/re]: I knew a Log Cabiner in Pittsburgh. His desire not to pay taxes was stronger than his self-respect. That, and he got a lot of dates there. Your theory probably holds up for many of them, though.

  14. JSDC007

    Boy, that truck drivin’, Cosmo-modellin’, working-out-on-his-stationary-bike, 50-something Scott Brown wastes no time now, does he?

  15. M.Steele

    [re=515516]Jukesgrrl[/re]: To be fair to the C-Packers, there just ain’t a lot of browns in that crowd.

  16. vespula maculata

    Not mine.

    If you find one looking for Mr. Mid-30s ready to surrender to ‘daddy’ on all fours, that might be mine. I can’t understand how oral remains so overrated to this day.

  17. lawrenceofthedesert

    I’ve always bridled at the use of “to be” in that manner — “be white, or latin, in your 20’s or 30’s.” It’s verbal colonialism.

  18. AutomaticPilot

    [re=515596]NoYoureWrong[/re]: Why are they all saying “discrete” when they really mean “discreet”? They’re just entertaining one at a time?

  19. Long Form Def Certificate

    Since when does “drug/disease free” not imply “HIV neg”? Has this Dupont ‘mo been taking pointers on HIV/AIDS from South Africa’s president & health establishment?

  20. PickneyPinchback

    So in other words, someone with a cabin is looking for a log. Don’t they already have a club for that? A big, thick, hard club?

  21. SayItWithWookies

    [re=515637]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Aaargh — thanks for that. I’ll have to remember which neurons have that memory so I can excise them at the soonest possible opportunity.

  22. Mad Brahms

    [re=515480]The Other Sarah T[/re]: God, I didn’t know that kid existed, and I was much happier back then. Gyah.

    [re=515855]Mr Blifil[/re]: Maybe he’s got some sort of pre-Vatican-II mass fetish? It would make more sense, though the thought of anyone draining Mel Gibson sort of turns my stomach.

  23. PsycGirl

    [re=515480]The Other Sarah T[/re]: According to that entry, Time magazine said of this kid that “Laugh all you want, but the way things are going, he could soon replace Michael Steele.”

    He’s going to be a black Republican? How does that happen? Was Steele a white Jewish kid once?

  24. fork-wielding maniac

    i don’t have much experience with gay personal ads, so pardon my naivete:

    could this poster be a woman?

    i think i just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

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  26. Mad Brahms

    [re=515914]fork-wielding maniac[/re]: Not in the “m4m” forum (hint: it does not actually stand for “million for marriage”

    [re=515905]PsycGirl[/re]: Well, he’s a Jew for Jesus, and Michael Steele is a black man for Republicanism, so in a twisted way, it sort of makes sense.

  27. blackdontcrack

    i used to sleep with one of the log cabiners back in the day. he was pretty good but not dateable.

  28. Smoke Filled Roommate

    Sheesh, Mittens just came out, yet he’s back to lying about his age and being “discreet” on Craigslist.

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