ENDORSEMENTS  10:31 am February 10, 2010

Grover Norquist Hearts John McCain

by Sara K. Smith

Poor old John McCain is having a hard time these days, now that his party has been taken over by nativist ignoramus lunatics who have no respect for an ancient WAR HERO who once teamed up with a liberal Jew to take away Americans’ most precious freedom: the freedom to let Saudi corporations run political ads during the Super Bowl. McCain faces two (2) primary opponents who are always calling him a communist hippie, which has forced him to pretend to be an actual conservative.

Good news for John McCain, though! Grover Norquist of Americans for Tax Reform has endorsed him. This is sort of ironic because nine years ago Jammakain opposed George Bush’s bravest and most important piece of legislation ever, a tax cut for needy plutocrats.

Praising McCain for his long-standing opposition to federal earmarks and his signing of the ATR “Taxpayer Protection Pledge,” Norquist said the 2008 Republican presidential nominee “consistently votes against tax increases and for spending restraint.”

Oh right, earmarks! They were those things that McCain spent half the 2008 campaign getting mad about, and nobody cared, but then Obama got elected and suddenly earmarks were the most terrible thing ever. The point is, please re-elect John McCain so that he can spend his twilight years in DC, eating steaks with Lindsey Graham.

Norquist endorses McCain’s re-election bid [CNN Political Ticker]

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TCDang February 10, 2010 at 10:33 am

Hilarious-that’s always what I think of when that guy’s name comes up–particularly incongruous when you think of him trying to drown government in a bathtub…

gurukalehuru February 10, 2010 at 10:34 am

Is that Megan’s dad?

watershed February 10, 2010 at 10:38 am

I have a snow day and I’m laughing at a picture of Grover. Apparently I’m seven years old all over again!

ManchuCandidate February 10, 2010 at 10:40 am

“Please don’t make me spend anymore time that Trollop!”
Jamkane ’10

V572625694 February 10, 2010 at 10:43 am

Grover Norquist is as much of a careerist hack as John Edwards’ BFF Andrew Young. If the money were right he’d be shilling for SEUI. Ain’t politics grand? Poor old Panamanian strongman Juan McCain tried to throttle down the rivers of cash, and now look what they’re doing to him.

BlueStateLibtard February 10, 2010 at 10:43 am

Considering that McCrazy has been on the government dole and on the free gov’t health care for longer than I’ve been alive, I think it’s about time he stepped aside. I pity Cindy though.

charlesdegoal February 10, 2010 at 10:45 am

Norquist, right. Sounds suspiciously Swedish to me. Probably a socialist passing himself off as a conservative to better ridicule the Republicans. Don’t trust this new “friend” Johnny, Sarah’s coming to the rescue.

AllHat February 10, 2010 at 10:46 am

I especially love how Grover’s wife works at USAID, so his very principled convictions about shrinking government obviously don’t stretch that far.

weejee February 10, 2010 at 10:51 am

In the nine years since his sally against l’arbuste on tax cuts Jammakain has caught the oldes. He now needs mass infusions of plutonium to keep his reactor running and so now loves the plutocrats that provide it.

Buzz Feedback February 10, 2010 at 10:54 am

Villagers circling the wagons. Charming! Did any of the muppets have genitalia? Just wondering since nobody ever had pants on.

Barcode of the Apocalypse February 10, 2010 at 10:54 am

“…eating steaks with Lindsey Graham.” Surely you’re referring to tube steaks? I believe that’s Lindsey’s favorite.

Jumping Jim February 10, 2010 at 10:58 am

His wife owns a Beer Distributorship. Like, for a whole state.

Most fighter pilots would have called their life complete right after “I do.”

bitchincamaro February 10, 2010 at 10:58 am

I heard this hack on The Diane Rehms Show yesterday. She whacked his peepee for name-calling her other guests. I love that old hag.

teebob2000 February 10, 2010 at 10:58 am

Is “eating steaks” a gay euphemism that us straight-shooters aren’t aware of?

teebob2000 February 10, 2010 at 11:00 am

Oh Jeebuz, that reference was REALLY uncalled for.


Jumping Jim February 10, 2010 at 11:00 am

[re=510543]AllHat[/re]: It would be very unprincipled for a Republican to reject a paycheck.

DickRod February 10, 2010 at 11:01 am

[re=510546]Buzz Feedback[/re]: What does one thing have to do with the other? I don’t have pants on during this fine snow day, and I have a fine set of genitalia. Does this mean I can’t join the Muppets?

AllHat February 10, 2010 at 11:08 am

[re=510551]bitchincamaro[/re]: Too right. She may be 103, but she manages to school those whipper-snappers.

Cape Clod February 10, 2010 at 11:11 am

I can’t wait until Snowbilly comes to AZ to campaign for his primary opponent.

PlanetWingnuta February 10, 2010 at 11:11 am

eating steak..wow i didnt know about this….adding it to my vocab…

x111e7thst February 10, 2010 at 11:13 am

[re=510533]gurukalehuru[/re]: He’s that trollop cunt Cindy’s husband I think.

EdFlinstone February 10, 2010 at 11:20 am

True story: Grovers father would steal bites of his ice cream cone, one bite would be sales tax and others would be income, estate tax etc. Well for a young chubbers, you can see how taxes traumatized Grover.

Katydid February 10, 2010 at 11:22 am

I’m doing my part to defeat the old bastard. I called my aunt and uncle, who live in Scottsdale and reminded them of McCain’s slither right, esp. his new harumphing against DADT. This is esp. important in my family, since my daughter is a lesbian.

My uncle is an Independent, and when I told him McCain’s new DADT bullshit, he was disgusted, said he wouldn’t vote for him, and would spread the word. I’m hoping this will help turn people in Scottsdale against him, richies who would otherwise vote for him.

We do what we can.

BeWoot February 10, 2010 at 11:29 am

McCain has to pretend to be an actual anything … except putz. He is a real putz.

gurukalehuru February 10, 2010 at 11:46 am

[re=510555]DickRod[/re]: Yes, that’s precisely what it means.

SmutBoffin February 10, 2010 at 11:51 am


Thanks, SKS!

El Pinche February 10, 2010 at 12:23 pm

O/T, but did anyone see Tweety rape Palin with his mouth?

Back on topic, John McCain sucks dog boners for bringing us this empty vessel called Sarah Palin.

Gorillionaire February 10, 2010 at 12:25 pm

[re=510563]Katydid[/re]: Hell yes.

JMP February 10, 2010 at 12:48 pm

What really is good news for John McCain is that he attracted two pure wignut opponents, who should split the teabagger vote.

V572625694 February 10, 2010 at 1:20 pm

[re=510573]El Pinche[/re]: I did see that yesterday. So there were at least two people watching MSNBC.

Lascauxcaveman February 10, 2010 at 1:20 pm

[/sound of Grover Norquist desperately trying to be relevant again]

Birdcrash February 10, 2010 at 1:23 pm

[re=510562]EdFlinstone[/re]: Young Grover, had he a bit of wit about him, might have embedded turd chips and lead pellets in his ice cream cone to demonstrate to his father the nightmare of a taxless utopia.

Gorillionaire February 10, 2010 at 1:51 pm

In heaven, every American that earned less than $250K a year gets to kick Norquist in the nads five times a day.

dijetlo February 10, 2010 at 1:52 pm

Grover Norquist Evil Garden Gnome
Good grief man, it’s on his driver license!

populucious February 10, 2010 at 4:28 pm

The Senate is the new Medicare…don’t worry about finding grandpappy a nursing home, just get him a Senate gig.

jetjaguar February 11, 2010 at 11:41 am

At first I was like… why Super Grover? Then I was like… why not ALWAYS Super Grover?

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