what is even going on?

Additional California Senate Candidate Comes Out Against Sheep And Also Carly Fiorina


Enter: California senatorial candidate Chuck DeVore.

Half of his platform appears to be nothing more than a promise, to no one, that his campaign is a “demon sheep free-zone,” while the other half is a pledge to forgo “silly slogans.” Please donate your “Twitter ID” to this man immediately, so he can win. [Thank you, commenter “Voyou Charmant”]

About the author

Juli Weiner was Wonkette's beloved intern and books columnist and then morning editor until she was hired away by Vanity Fair in 2010.

View all articles by Juli Weiner

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here with a few helpful links to ease your transition to Disqus - Claiming Old Accounts - Claiming Your ID Comments [Looking into whether this is still possible - Shy] - Turning off Disqus Notifications. And, as always, remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • Red Zeppelin

    Obviously, we need more sheep, demon or otherwise, more sheep fucking, more sheep jokes (“they don’t so much fly as plummet”), rather than less.

  • yargisbargis

    CGI WIN!*

    * if comparing to demon sheep ad…

  • SmutBoffin

    That font just screams “I ARE A SERIOUS CANDIDATE”.

  • MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend

    He has my vote!

    (I will write him in during the next VA election.)

  • magic titty

    Best acronym ever?

  • freakishlystrong

    2010’s should be almost as fun as the aughts. And by funny I mean fucked up.

  • ShamWow

    His main website is awesome, too. I love the blood pressure monitor showing that he raised over $60,000 already.

    http://chuckdevore.com/index.asp

  • DemmeFatale

    Take that Minnesota!!

    Here in CA, we can out-crazy anyone! (But then, you knew that!)

  • SayItWithWookies

    For a moment there I was afraid this election would deteriorate into the candidates batting mindless inanities back and forth. Mercifully, it’s only just now rising to that level.

  • WadISay

    But, secretly, everybody wants to be on whatever drugs Fiorino’s creative director is using.

  • give us a bob

    [re=507613]magic titty[/re]: Best acronym ever would be to expand this name of that town in Wales: Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

    Anyone wanna give it a shot?

  • the problem child

    I am fascinated by your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

  • give us a bob

    As so the war over Geocities’ dried-up corpse began…

  • lawrenceofthedesert

    Fiorina’s created a nice artificial wave that all her opponents can surf — dude!

  • geminisunmars

    [re=507618]ShamWow[/re]: And you all said that Conservatoids weren’t capable of sarcasm.

  • Advocatus_Diaboli

    This is good news for John McCain.

  • ShamWow

    But does he have a truck?

  • whiskey tango foxtrot

    Comic sans ftw! (literally, the win)

  • yargisbargis

    Has anyone “chatted with Chuck” yet?

  • Jim89048

    [re=507635]ShamWow[/re]: Or daughters he can pimp out?

  • TGY

    D.A.D.E.S?

  • Darkness

    I hope DeVore pays his webmaster in whore diamonds. He or she deserves them.

  • martinette

    [re=507619]DemmeFatale[/re]: Yeah but California has six times more sheeple. On a per capita basis, Minnesota is comfortably ahead.

  • Berkeley Bear

    You know Babs Boxer’s staff is building a clip file of all this stuff and just giggling hysterically.

    Oddly, enough, though, it’s the GOP candidates for governor that are worried about each other’s mental condition and reporting stuff to the FBI.

  • Berkeley Bear

    DeVore is the guy with no money in a knife fight between Fiorina and Campbell for who can throw the most cash in a hole.

  • Come here a minute

    S.F.T.E.O.D.S.F.O.P.D. is just another word for nothing left to lose.

  • DoktorZoom

    Sheep? This would work a lot better if his name were Herb DeVore.

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    As a member of AFA (Acronym Free America) I am truly offended.

  • PJ

    [re=507619]DemmeFatale[/re]: Here in Minnesota, we knit with yarn from demon sheep and think nothing of it.

    Back at you.

  • Way Cool Larry

    [re=507665]DoktorZoom[/re]: yeah, I was thinking along the same lines!

  • gurukalehuru

    That was pretty quick thinking on Chuck’s part. Some credit for that, alone.

  • letmetellyou

    [re=507618]ShamWow[/re]: I really like the title of his family picture. “The Chuck Devore Family.” They are *the* source for all things Chuck Devore Family related.

  • Jim89048

    [re=507684]letmetellyou[/re]: And it appears he does have daughters to pimp out, hooray!

  • mumblyjoe

    Shit just got serious.

    Or, well, okay, maybe the opposite.

  • DoktorZoom

    “Chuck DeVour” would be a great name for a gay pornstar….or pro wrestler. Also.

  • DoktorZoom

    [re=507694]DoktorZoom[/re]: Well, hell. May as well go FULL FUCKING RETARDED with my avatar. Zippy will return at the end of the current crisis.

  • ioksotot23

    Lizard People Against Demon Sheep

    FTW!!!

  • Jukesgrrl

    [re=507728]ioksotot23[/re]: Is that going to be the next Minnesota senatorial campaign?

  • betterDeadThanRed

    [re=507674]PJ[/re]:
    Fiorino gave it a good try but she doesn’t have Michell’s crazy-eyed look down. Crazy Bachmann Overdrive is still my favorite.

  • Ducksworthy

    [re=507782]betterDeadThanRed[/re]: And Fiorino is way behind Bachmannnn in the weird and crazy statements department. Those of us in the frozen north remember when Michellle made a name for herself by being outraged by lesbians in the women’s bathroom at the state capitol. Or at least so she claimed.

  • problemwithcaring

    [re=507659]Come here a minute[/re]: Win.

  • lochnessmonster

    The only thing sheep are good for is eating…lamb chops are the best. The wool makes me itch.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    [re=507618]ShamWow[/re]: I went to DeVore’s website, saw his photo, and for some reason now I have an overwhelming urge to buy a pair of shoes from him.

  • Allyson

    [re=508053]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Really? Because he looks exactly like a used car salesman to me…
    But after seeing the “Chat with Chuck” section of the website, I’ll never be able to see a Charles Schwab ad without recoiling in horror…or ROTFLMAO, depending on whether we Californians have the good sense not to vote for this lemon.

  • Alexander the Large

    The use of comic sans typeface in this day and age is completely unacceptable, I expect this Mr. DeVore to issue a full retraction and apology post-haste

  • zooses

    As far as I can tell no one’s mentioned it yet, but the Demon Sheeple auteur is Fred Davis of Strategic Perceptions, crazy Sen. Inhofe’s nephew.