PLATES OF HATE  10:19 am February 4, 2010

The National Prayer Breakfast Is Especially Homophobic And Murderous This Year

by Juli Weiner

Everyone hates Barack Obama extra much today for speaking at the National Prayer Breakfast, which is racist against gays. Basically every President since Hillary Clinton has attended this thing, but Obama is in trouble because some of the hosts of this year’s breakfast—obviously a group with the word “Family” in the name—want to… guess what horrendous thing… quickly… time’s up! The answer is “execute all the homosexuals in Uganda. “

It’s not just your Wonkette up to its old hyperbole again!

The organizations say some of the members [of the conservative Christian group that organizes the breakfast, called The Family or The Fellowship] back legislation in Uganda that would criminalize homosexuality, with the death penalty possible in some cases.

A number of liberal religious leaders have organized an “American Prayer Hour” on Thursday to protest the National Prayer Breakfast.

An organizer of the “Prayer Hour,” Harry Knox of the pro-gay-rights Human Rights Campaign, said Tuesday that he hopes Obama uses his address at the breakfast to condemn the Uganda law.

“We’re not surprised that the president wanted to continue the trend of every president speaking at the prayer breakfast,” Knox said in an interview with the website BeliefNet. “But we thought it was important that he recognize that his attendance has great power — that the event can be redeemed, frankly.”

So, the gays want this to be a National Prayer Brunch, is that the issue?

[The Hill]

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nbawriter February 4, 2010 at 10:22 am

So, it’s people praying for people who are praying for other people to rot in jail.

Is there a biggest waste of time and energy on this planet than prayer?

Lascauxcaveman February 4, 2010 at 10:27 am

Which one is Judean Peoples Front again?

JMP February 4, 2010 at 10:28 am

No, the event cannot be redeemed even if the President condemns the kill-the-gays law; there’s still the problem with the “prayer” part, the continuing encouragement of religion that makes it an inherently bad event.

ForTheTurnstiles February 4, 2010 at 10:29 am

[re=507474]nbawriter[/re]: Yes, they’re called the Los Angeles Lakers or, as of last night, the Utah Jazz. Because those guys wear ridiculous costumes and are traditional rivals to my beloved Portland TrailBlazers, for whom I pray each night.

FreshCliches February 4, 2010 at 10:32 am
anonymousryan February 4, 2010 at 10:33 am

If they would just pray instead of vote we wouldn’t have a problem.

V572625694 February 4, 2010 at 10:34 am

Where do these assholes get off calling their little seance the “National” Prayer Breakfast? Are Wiccans invited? How about atheists?

For that matter, that so-called “National” Cathedral is another copyright violation. Why doesn’t Barry do something about this?

Lorax February 4, 2010 at 10:35 am

There’s almost nothing I love/hate more than going to a political event, where I’m surrounded by people who I KNOW are some of the hardest drinking, foul-mouthed, backstabbing bedhoppers I’ve ever met, but then those heads quicksnap down when it’s time to pray publicly. Ooooooooh, standing there next to those who are pious AND hungover gives me a tingly feeling all over. I like to call it “Jesus”.

KJV, Matthew 6:5–”And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.”

Here’s a thought: everybody pray on their own time, in their own closets or churches or whatever, and quit playing this “Ooh, look at me! I’m praying! Vote for me!” nonsense.

Fucking Pharisees. Also.

smitallica February 4, 2010 at 10:38 am

This is ok because everyone knows there would be no actual gays at this breakfast. Now, the National Prayer BRUNCH, on the other hand…

Chickensmack February 4, 2010 at 10:38 am

I guess conservatives will be surprised to see the Magic Negro™ Muslin at a prayer event… even though Ugandans and Kenyans, according to the other white dudes attending, know “those black folk” already know each other.

Norbert February 4, 2010 at 10:44 am

It is especially important to scrunch up your face when you pray, that way God knows you are praying extra hard and really mean it. I will only vote for someone who scrunches when they pray.

bureaucrap February 4, 2010 at 10:45 am

Pop Tarts and Lucky Charms = Prayer Breakfast
Eggs Benedict(so named after benedictine monks) and Mimosas = Prayer Brunch

Now seriously people, which one sounds better to you?

norbizness February 4, 2010 at 10:47 am

I want Obama to show up and sing ‘Had a Dad’ by Jane’s Addiction, or…

Chaplain: Let us praise God. O Lord…
Congregation: O Lord…
Chaplain: …Ooh, You are so big…
Congregation: …ooh, You are so big…
Chaplain: …So absolutely huge.
Congregation: …So absolutely huge.
Chaplain: Gosh, we’re all really impressed down here, I can tell You.
Congregation: Gosh, we’re all really impressed down here, I can tell You.
Chaplain: Forgive us, O Lord, for this, our dreadful toadying, and…
Congregation: And barefaced flattery.
Chaplain: But You are so strong and, well, just so super.
Congregation: Fantastic.
Humphrey: Amen.
Congregation: Amen.

jetjaguar February 4, 2010 at 10:57 am
ttommyunger February 4, 2010 at 11:01 am

Lorax RULES, Motherfuckers!

JMP February 4, 2010 at 11:14 am

[re=507496]norbizness[/re]: It would also be good to go for the other classic Python hymn.:

All things dull and ugly,
All creatures short and squat,
All things rude and nasty,
The Lord God made the lot.
Each little snake that poisons,
Each little wasp that stings,
He made their brutish venom.
He made their horrid wings.

All things sick and cancerous,
All evil great and small,
All things foul and dangerous,
The Lord God made them all.

Each nasty little hornet,
Each beastly little squid–
Who made the spikey urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!

All things scabbed and ulcerous,
All pox both great and small,
Putrid, foul and gangrenous,
The Lord God made them all.


CaiteeCruelle February 4, 2010 at 11:14 am

[re=507511]ttommyunger[/re]: Ya know who agrees? These people. However, their authority to speak on religious issues isn’t really valid unless they have stated opinions on everything Pat Robertson ever said.

alzronnie February 4, 2010 at 11:16 am

Lorax: If they prayed at home they couldn’t pick up any strange like they can at these events or at church.

Looy February 4, 2010 at 11:17 am

Here’s what Obama said, at the breakfast,:

“We may disagree about gay marriage, but surely we can agree that it is
unconscionable to target gays and lesbians for who they are – whether it’s
here in the United States or, as Hillary mentioned, more extremely in odious
laws that are being proposed most recently in Uganda.”

rikitikitavi February 4, 2010 at 11:20 am

[re=507487]smitallica[/re]: You mean, of course, that their would be no out gays at the prayer breakfast.

Come here a minute February 4, 2010 at 11:22 am

Make it a Linner and I’m in. Oh, and also atheist.

teebob2000 February 4, 2010 at 11:25 am

“execute all the homosexuals in Uganda.”

So, I’m not following: is that good or bad?

chaste everywhere February 4, 2010 at 11:28 am

[re=507493]Norbert[/re]: I scrunch up my face when I’m sitting in the smallest room of my house and everything’s going . . . slower than I’d like. Does that count?

[re=507527]Looy[/re]: Glad to hear it! But then, the one thing we all seem to agree on about the man is that he’s good at sayin’ stuff.

SayItWithWookies February 4, 2010 at 11:37 am

As long as he tells them the Constitution is more relevant than their deity, and that they have to be Americans in the civil sphere and Christians/Jews/Muslims/whatever somewhere else, I’m fine with it. Also that their oleagenous piety doesn’t privilege them above anyone else, that the Constitution is not based on the Bible, and that adhering to principles that are beyond comprehension may be okay for a whacked-out human, but that’s not the way to govern a country. Oh, and that the IRS is looking into revoking any tax-exempt status their organization claims.

Kool Keith February 4, 2010 at 11:47 am

So is this mysterious Christian Illuminati genocide group called “The Family” or is it called “The Fellowship”? Or is it officially called “The Family or The Fellowship?”, like some kind of secret question only level-7 homophobia Thetans know the answer to?

Gorillionaire February 4, 2010 at 11:47 am

[re=507547]SayItWithWookies[/re]: “oleagenous piety” is such a great phrase.

takes12no1 February 4, 2010 at 11:54 am

He got out of this last year didn’t he? Took too much heat from the christian conservatives for that I suppose. Screw the “national” prayer breakfast and the Family. He should go to the gay party instead. Sounds like much more fun.

betterDeadThanRed February 4, 2010 at 12:16 pm

[re=507522]JMP[/re]: Or as Blake put it:
(But then again poetry is gay.)

TIGER, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

In what distant deeps or skies
Burnt the fire of thine eyes?
On what wings dare he aspire?
What the hand dare seize the fire?

And what shoulder and what art
Could twist the sinews of thy heart?
And when thy heart began to beat,
What dread hand and what dread feet?

What the hammer? what the chain?
In what furnace was thy brain?
What the anvil? What dread grasp
Dare its deadly terrors clasp?

When the stars threw down their spears,
And water’d heaven with their tears,
Did He smile His work to see?
Did He who made the lamb make thee?

Tiger, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?

One Yield Regular February 4, 2010 at 12:43 pm

This can only lead to the division of professional prayer into a “National Prayer League” and an “American Prayer League,” with an annual Super Bowl of Prayer to decide the winningest, prayingest team.

lawrenceofthedesert February 4, 2010 at 12:46 pm

Well, they could have called it the National Airhead Breakfast, or the National Breakfast for Dummies… will Carrie Prejean be pole dancing?

Tommmcatt February 4, 2010 at 12:47 pm

A national prayer circuit party, please. You could call it “On Your Knees”.

Thank you very much.

BeWoot February 4, 2010 at 12:53 pm

[re=507483]FreshCliches[/re]: Weird that is tagged as a joke.

One Yield Regular February 4, 2010 at 1:08 pm

[re=507642]Tommmcatt[/re]: Okay, you win.

[re=507547]SayItWithWookies[/re]: To that, I can only say: Amen.

Ducksworthy February 4, 2010 at 1:19 pm

This thing was and has been alway sponsored by The Family, the enablers of Mark Sanford, John Ensign and the other c street perverts. Why we may ask are so many c Streeters depraved assholes? Aren’t they Christians?

The simple answer is no. Not if by christians you mean people who think the teachings of Jeebus apply to them. The Family teaches its members that all that crap about love your neighbor (and in fact the older stuff about not killing people (e.g Ugandan geh’s) or screwing other people’s wives) only applies to the little people. Not to the chosen. And members of the Family are, by definition, the chosen.

Thats what Mark Sanford meant when he compared himself to King David. In the bible David kills a guy so he can fuk his wife. But Gawd forgives him see because he (Gawd) has an idea he wants to use David for later.

That’s Mark Sanford. Gawd has something special in mind for him (prezeldent?)

Hello Americuh! These are you true rulers. Ordained by Gawd.

Ducksworthy February 4, 2010 at 1:22 pm

Note to Harry Knox: Rename your geh “Prayer Hour” “The National Prayer Breakfast” for next year and screw the family. Actually I think I’d copyright the name The National Prayer Breakfast and capture the domain name now, if possible.

June Cleaver 2.0 February 4, 2010 at 1:34 pm

[re=507474]nbawriter[/re]: “Is there a biggest waste of time and energy on this planet than prayer?”

I guess so, since Clarence Thomas hasn’t had a heart attack yet.

GorillaTom February 4, 2010 at 1:42 pm

Nobody should be attending this event. The fundametalist whack jobs who are behind this farce represent a bigger threat to our way of life than most people could even imagine. Read “The Family: The Secret Fundamentalism at the Heart of American Power” by Jeff Sharlet to get the back story on this collection of sanctimonious demagogues.

Holy Cow!! February 4, 2010 at 1:47 pm

Dear Family:

Your god is fake.

FreshCliches February 4, 2010 at 2:00 pm

[re=507647]BeWoot[/re]: Barry Soetoro, The Insult Comic Muslin.

bitchincamaro February 4, 2010 at 3:00 pm

I heard it was to be prayer mixer.

JooJoo Bee February 4, 2010 at 3:34 pm

I can’t laugh. I’m too busy vomiting.

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