WELL THAT SUCKED, with all the jokes and the clapping! Poop all over that! Let’s see how horribly this went, by finding out what Wolf Blitzer and Chuck Todd and hmm, maybe Brit Hume think? Oh wait Brit Hume is dead, or at least retired, which is a slight to all Americans who won’t be able to retire until they’re 90, after President Obama’s Budget Commission is done eviscerating Social Security.
Jim Newell is such a pussy for refusing to liveblog all 2.5 hours of this horror. So: here is the last bit. And now here is some stuff about the Public Reaction to this pile of dog poo that the president just laid on the American People:
10:23 PM — Hoo boy that took a long fucking while.
10:24 PM — Chris Matthews called the speech “seductive,” and will now be mocked forever for his thinly veiled desire to fuck the shit out of the President.
10:27 PM — Matthews would like to see a high-speed intercontinental train in America someday but OH WELL we don’t all get our wishes.
10:28 PM — Who is totally psyched for Bob McDonnell? He is that guy who defeated the fake Terry McAuliffe in the exciting race for Virginia governor.
10:28 PM — “He is post-racial, by all appearances. I forgot tonight that he was black for an hour,” says Chris Matthews. Chris Matthews is a national treasure. He must be bronzed and made into an urn for funeral ashes. That word, “seduction” again. He is going to quietly excuse himself and go masturbate angrily in the MSNBC men’s toilet now.
10:31 PM — OK fuck this, let’s go to McDonnell. Oh he is a very regular-looking man! Behind him are seated the Four Pillars of the American economy: white ladies; the military; black ladies; and Asians. MASTERFUL PLACEMENT.
10:32 PM — Bob McDonnell, he is no fan of this National Debt. You know what else he dislikes? Big Government. Jesus, did he even see the speech? Or was this little stemwinder cooked up about 15 years ago and then thawed for easy delivery?
10:34 PM — Republicans will end frivolous lawsuits, and let health insurance companies operate from the Marianas Islands. These are the very foundational elements of True Reform.
10:35 PM — He just listed a web site AND said “Facebook” and “Twitter” all in the same sentence, which nearly killed him. It was the grossest sentence in American history.
10:36 PM — Why do the Democraps want to kill our jerbs?
10:37 PM — We will say this for Governor McDonnell. He has very blue eyes! And a child of his served in Iraq, which means he is basically beyond reproach. Unless you hate America, of course.
10:38 PM — SCOTTBROWN SCOTTBROWN SCOTTBROWN.
10:40 PM — We have a system of Federalism, which means that you hate government and governing. Look it up it’s in the Constitution.
10:40 PM — “To whom much is given, much must be required.” Which is why we must allow all the banks to keep all of their money forever, because of Capitalism.
10:41 PM — America will always be awesome, abortion sucks, the end.




{ 148 comments }
Harpymedusa Jean Schmidt touching and talking to POTUS! Bathe in hand sanitizer, stat, Hopey!
Dang–from last post–Cornyn’s official response is that the president has a credibility problem because he isn’t tuned in with what Americans care about…how we treat our terror suspects…
Yay! Sara’s back. Again!
Err, dog-poo FTW!
Bob McDonnell is going to deliver his speech at the Virginia House of Delegates. And they’re all standing to applaud him. It’s like a miniature version of Congress. Is Virginia going to secede again?
WHY all the Republicans standing up and clapping at times? What the hell? I’m totally disoriented or drunk!
Wow, Rachel Maddow is actually wearing a pastel color (as opposed to black or brown). Sorry, that is the biggest news bit of the night!
Oh, shit, Chris is talking about being ‘post racial’. I bet if Chris went to MS or AL, he’d figure out we ain’t ‘post racial’ yet.
Senator Sexy Time with the rebuttal?
Why do we vote for democrats again if they are going to capitulate to republicans?
Chris Matthews was blown away by the profundity that the old “Tribal Ways” were forgotten for an hour. What a racist he is.
I don’t think these talky guys realize that the Real World DC is on.
[re=503023]jagorev[/re]: If Virginia is leaving, I’m moving in with you.
Chris Matthews: “I forgot he was black tonight, for an hour.”
Somebody shut his mouth. Please.
BOB MCDONNELL OR SOMETHING.
THANK YEW.
Bob McDonald? Who?
The NYT is now showing the ReThuglican “response”
Have they ever done this with an audience?
Those two sons already have full rides to Liberty! Yaaaaay!
Ha ha ha. Funny joke with Sports Center.
Are we blogging about this, or what?
Bob McDonnell: Been in the job less than two weeks. Did Republicans learn nothing from the Palin experience? New and less experienced is not always the best choice.
Bob McDonell douchebag. Wow a stage and everything and even a military prop there.
The “Republican perspective” seems to be humorless.
So are his twin sons single?
[re=503033]ella[/re]:
Matthews: “I forgot he’s a total top, also…”
Sportscenter reference! Who had that on their bingo card?
“Chris Matthews called the speech “seductive,””
Please, God, no Obama/Matthews slash fiction. For the love of all that’s holy….
Find and keep meaningful work, at substandard wages and benefits…
[re=503025]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Hahahaha. I’m in GA. Post-fu*king racial?!? Hahahaha.
What a shock. The new governor of Virginia is anti-regulation.
Well, if soldier, black lady, white lady and asian guy trust him, why shouldn’t I?
Flanked by an Asian dude and a pretty black lady. Well-played, McDonnell, you Irish piece of… eh, I literally know nothing about you, including if you are actually Irish.
I was hoping, in a misguided attempt at progressiveness, the repubs would get a gypsy to do the reubuttal, but a white guys (closet case?) is nice too, I guess.
Bob McDonnell should just give a speech where he says “COAL COAL COAL COAL” over and over, b/c coal is a good metaphor for his policies.
[re=503033]ella[/re]: You guys still watch that poison that is msnbc? you guys do know that pbs and npr are free and more sane-y that any culture war driven network out there no matter their leaning.
The Repub response: I speak to you tonight here, surrounded by this Negress and this Asian guy…
[re=503017]schvitzatura[/re]: Isn’t Jean Schmidt afraid she’ll become a homosexual Communist? She strikes me as one of those people who thinks they’re contagious diseases.
I thought it was a surprisingly not shitty speech.
So sue me.
Sure no regulation,don’t mind the lead in the kids toys, the cadmium in their toy jewelry, melamine in their milk.
Did this asshole forget that his president W ran up 5 trillion in debt?
Yeah limited government, put out your own fires.
How do republicans get the balls to bitch about deficit spending? And why to the republicans breed so much?
Virginia, a commonwealth of landed gentry and country squires…BRING BACK THE DREAM!
Bob McDonnell is not embarrassing himself.
McDonnell-Brown in 2012!
Geez does Bob have a disappointed schoolmarm manner to him. I’d like to punch him in his pretty mouth.
Let’s see, two whites, a black, and an asian standing behind McDonell. Where’s the latino? RACIST!
Wow, wrong speech to go with tonight. “Congress is doing too much” – I think you all just got bitch slapped for that notion about 30mins ago.
Needs more foyer
Psh. Cooperation, not partisanship, eh? You’ve done a great fucking job of THAT, lately, Repubs. Good on ya.
[re=503042]tunamelt[/re]: they could go on a double date with Scott Brown’s girls!
Christ, have they put every black republican in America behind McDonnell?
McDonell says Repubs don’t want partisanship.
ORLY???
I will create 200 new jobs in Martinsville at the box factory at minimum wage and a free t-shirt!
Oh yeah the republican solution to health care. AS Grayson said, don’t get sick or if you do, die quickly.
Our bills are REALLY REALLY short, because we understand that you cannot read.
Wow — and the Republicans thought Obama’s columns at his 2008 acceptance speech was arrogant — how ’bout a mini-congress full of — um — old fat white toadies and the one nodding black woman behind you?
Hahahaha. Twitter. It’s so funny. Let’s all laugh.
[re=503054]PabaBritannica[/re]: I think he is.
No, seriously, who are these lunatics?
Virginia is scary.
We welcome your ideas on Joe Lieberman’s gay twatter at http://ArbeitMachtFrie.De…
“We are blessed her in America with vast natural resources and WE MUST USE THEM ALL.”
That’s right, fuck the Earth, fuck it right to death.
Why is Bob McDonnell doing this wildly inappropriate partisan speech in a government building with a uniformed member of the military applauding in the background? Can you just hold partisan events in the state legislature and fill it with supporters and staffers?! How far-reaching was this horrible SCOTUS decision?!?! Fuck is goin’ on?!?!?!
McDonell said that the GOP solutions won’t be made behind closed doors and with special interests. Was he out of the country for all the Bush years?
Also says that Virginia will be the first state in the region to explore for gas/oil offshore. Do you really think that if there was a big whopper of an oil reserve off the Mid-Atlantic that someone wouldn’t be drilling already?
[re=503059]WadISay[/re]: Does he own just one, or both?
[re=503062]Beowoof[/re]: Yeah, limited government, put out your own Goddamned fires. Fixed!
Mathews did go off on the Republicans and even came out and said the American people shouldn’t vote for them. So, I’m cool with all the seduction and post-racial Obama talk
McDonnell’s twin sons are off to drink, read Penthouse and jerk themselves off.
“He is post-racial, by all appearances. I forgot tonight that he was black for an hour,” says Chris Matthews.
Ah, yes, that old classic! “I don’t consider you black. You don’t ACT black.”
Gee, thanks.
Kaiser Permanente? I’d love the gubmint to have it and it be the public option, just like that Quaker socialist communard Chicom-lovin’ Nixon wanted for ‘Murica back in the good ‘ol days….
We must use all the natural resources. Did anyone see that Reno 911 when Junior said that if we use up all the oil first we beat the terrorists? Yeah I bet this guy promotes the same reasoning with his Hummer.
[re=503080]tunamelt[/re]: gotta admit, twitter is a funny word
Zip code? What? Rack size, he meant to say.
But is your daughter available, McDonnell?
Hey I would like to bang the chubby blond.
[re=503042]tunamelt[/re]: Forget it mate, they’re already promised to a Mr. “R Limbaugh”…
How many fucking kids does he have? Great now I’m going to have to reproduce.
He has a girl child who served in Iraq.
MCDONNELL-BROWN: FEEL THE CHANGE
This middle-school production of the SOTU is charming.
Attempting bombing of flight was Obama’s direct fault. Also, the bomber is being massaged in a spa right now, by geisha, and this is wrong.
I refuse to believe that this man is not fucking at least three women.
Wow — so far McDonnell is for jobs, growth, security and education. Why did he even bother to give this wet noodle of a speech?
[re=503025]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: She’s switched? Ambiguity continues to haunt the Democratic party.
This mock SOTU stage at the House of Delegates is really helping him look dignified. Too bad Jindal didn’t think of it.
I’m pretty sure this guy is talking. His mouth is moving and everything, and I think there’s sound coming from it. I have no idea what he said about anything, though.
Why is it that so many Republicans look like oversized Ken dolls? The resemblence is uncanny: http://tinyurl.com/2lxfhl
Bob, didn’t Barry ask you to stop lying about what he said?
Those legislators are acting like a WVA bunch. Oh yeah, they really are about the same thing.
Wait, I thought that Barry was the “Drill, drill, drill” guy…
“We must provide equality of opportunity for all, ‘cepting teh Kweers…”
[re=503097]jagorev[/re]: I think ‘twat” is funnier.
God-given talents for wimmen? Home economics and preggers for all Virginia wimminfolk!
Oh yeah the free market solution always works so well. Caring corporations just bringing good things to my life.
Turned on rebuttal out of curiousity, in time to hear him argue that we should be torturing the living hell out of brown people. What a surprise. Inspiration!
I wish Hiro’s dad would stop nodding so much. Also, pretty black lady is clearly a robot. She keeps powering down.
Scriptures!!!
Southerners talking about Federalism always make me want to send in General Sherman to burn Georgia
Quit descrbing about the man who put powder in his panties and then burned a sensitive area as a fucking terrorist. I’m a detroiter and every time anyone talks about it (which is rare, we have actual problems) everyone just wonders how is healing up.
what, exactly, are german engineers doing in the middle of the midwest with vests and hardhats and wires and shit?
i have been meaning to ask this all day.
[re=503052]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: I bet he is from the North. Belfast protestant most likely.
[re=503110]ms_mcgee[/re]: That’s how the Reptilians breed them.
~
[re=503108]jagorev[/re]: you and the GOV need to get a room
McDonnell says that all Americans should work together. Perhaps he should address his GOP colleagues in Congress.
Pointless and innocuous.
Brian Williams is mocking the colored people behind Bob!
Is there an applause sign, or have they just been told to clap after every sentence?
Thank God that’s over?
Jesus. This fella is even allegedly straighter than Sentator Naked Dad.
lame
[re=503110]ms_mcgee[/re]: Esp. from the waist down.
Hey Wonk, you were linked to during The Guardian’s liveblog.
small gov’t, no new taxes,greatest health care system in the world blah blah fucking blah read my lips!
Token Korean Asian Bulgogi Vendors, FTL!
“We can give the American people all they want and it won’t cost us a penny”.
This is the same speech Jindal read last year.
[re=503108]jagorev[/re]: I liked it much better when Piyush went commando and did the rebuttal without the applause sign.
what, exactly, are german engineers doing in the middle of the midwest with vests and hardhats and wires and shit? i have been meaning to ask this all day.
Well. CNN is on commercial. Fuck it all. Hopey did great. Sarah K. Smith, how did the appeasing Baby K. Smith go? I remember those days, but as I have the olds, it is gladly in my rear view mirror.
I liked that Hussein finally stated the fact that Bubba left a budget surplus, that Dubya fucked everything up (as he’s always done throughout his sorry-ass life) and that the Repugs should either get with the program, get out of the way or shut the fuck up for good. It was funny watching their faces, especially asshole McConnell and WALNUTS! just taking it in up in the ass, as they always do, because it’s true.
Also too. At the risk of sounding “tea-buggery” Fuck the Banks. Yes, Fuck them hard.
[re=503119]waitforsugar[/re]: My girlfriend loves you for that.
“Bob McDonnell, he is no fan of this National Debt.”
Of course not. This why, to cure Virginia’s budget deficit, Bob proposes to abolish 12th grade in the Virginia public schools, 10th and 11th grade being things of its elitist past,
Anyone watching the Faux News “coverage” I would but the TV is new and I would probably be throwing shit at it.
I predict future SotU responses will be given from packed bars.
You know who else had very blue eyes?
(No, seriously.)
[re=503140]ladymacbeth[/re]: Creating “Das Tausendjahre Windenergie Reich”!
Mittlerer Westen Heimat Erwacht!
[re=503144]smashtheduck[/re]: Great. Since I’m tipsy, I love your girlfriend too.
What? No Michael Steele? I’m going to bed.
[re=503149]AxmxZ[/re]:
“You know who else has very blue eyes?”
An Eskimo sled dog.
Race-mixing, America’s curse.
[re=503069]Suds McKenzie[/re]: A wider shot would show Pat Robertson slipping Regent’s grad Governorista Bob pages to read.
[re=503152]snideinplainsight[/re]: Check the shadows.
Bob does want teh volcano monitoring for Virginia.
First: I have to know if Sara loves and appreciates us all, too.
Second: I saw CNN and it looked like they were interviewing some carefully chosen “average Americans” for their take on the speech.
I would rather listen to Tweety and Keith exchange chit chat. Anything but that. I hate that shit even when they do it on PBS, too.
Patchwork Nation is interesting but when they have panels of real people? Fuck it. That’s how much I hate it. I had to iterate it.
Oh, and major credit to the prez for not singling out anyone in the gallery and doing that Clinton, “like Bob Schmo, firefighter who rescued a kitty kat.” You know, that shit.
Basically, I’m just short of fuck the people. Not us, of course.
[re=503147]Beowoof[/re]: I managed about four minutes of their disparaging remarks…they emphasized how pessimistic real america is despite hopeys optimism,and were amazed that he hadn’t abandoned all his failed programs. Also stop giving terrists all kinds of legal rights, feather pillows and sweets and hang’em…blahblahblah
[re=503153]Jim Newell[/re]: “NEW CHRIS MATTHEWS POST UP YOU COCKSHITS”
I’m devastated. I thought Jim loved and appreciated us. My self esteem is shattered, forever. Are you proud of yourself, young man?
I am so going to rent out the Virginia legislature building and do some infomercials for my “Porn Workout” video series. Except I won’t have the Republican staffers with the dead eyes filling the room, it will be nothing but hooters girls. Yee HAW!
[re=503153]Jim Newell[/re]: I haven’t seen the BLINK tag used since 1997. Now I feel really old. Leave me alone while I figure out why I can’t log into my Compuserve account.
[re=503120]ladymacbeth[/re]: That’s just O’Queef and crew, out to tap one of Hopey’s windmills.
“To whom much is given, much must be required.”
Luke 12:48
Usually, if not always, omitted by those quoting this N.T. adage is its first sentence:
“King James Bible
“But he that knew not [what offense he committed], and did commit things worthy of [whipping] stripes, shall be beaten with few stripes.”
Translation: “Rastus, you still gonna get an ass-thrashing now.”
Still awake?
[re=503054]PabaBritannica[/re]: But coal is black, what are you, a racist?
[re=503153]Jim Newell[/re]: Why does the fact that it is blinking make me think this comment is hilarious?
No I have not been drinking. My bad.
When I saw SOTU in the headline, my brain interpreted it as “STFU.” Coincidence?
Am I the only one who noticed when Walnuts leaned in to Lindsay for a little sugar and he wouldn’t give one? I’m thinking Graham’s a little jealous about that new boy from Massachusetts and his special relationship with the old boy.
It was fun to watch this speech delivered from the rostrum of the House of Representatives of the Confederate States of America.
Ha, Bob McDonnell had to come out in favor of edumacating the womens, when we know what he really thinks. Those retards clapping for him sure looked well fed and happy. “KEEP SMILING IT SAYS TO PEOPLE THAT YOU FIND HIM INSPIRING AND THAT YOU LOVE HIM.” Oh and he was too chicken shit to say “Jesus” even as he was dog-whistling the Fristian FUNdaMENTALists. Stupid hair too, stay away from blow driers you sissy mary.
Hopey sent me an email! Tireless, he is. He was just pimpin’ me for money, but still…
[re=503221]Mr Blifil[/re]: “Ha, Bob McDonnell had to come out in favor of edumacating the womens”
How many Cotillions must they attend first?
I got to, “10:36 PM — Why do the Democraps want to kill our jerbs?,” and LOST MY MIND with laughter! Funniest sentence in the history of ever! WAAAAAAAAAT
[re=503023]jagorev[/re]: Been done before by someone who dissolved the Deutsches Reich Congress in ’34.
[re=503061]desertwind[/re]: I’m a nidiot! I didn’t read all… blah. Bob McDonnell. Ooops didn’t read it was “the public”.
I meant Obama’s speech was not shitty. Didn’t hear/see/read McDonnell’s. ‘Cause — who cares?
Waiter!
[re=503080]tunamelt[/re]: It is. And I do. Almost every time. Sad.
But did you guys see GOVERNOR PALIN’S critique of the speech! GENIUS!
http://video.foxnews.com/v/3991409/palins-take-on-obamas-address?category_id=86858
They’re trying so frantically to feed her her lines and I bet you a dollar she’s gone rogue or maverick or some shit and ditched the teleprompter and handler. I just watched the whole thing and I have no idea what she said. Neither does anybody else! I love this batty, loony broad so much. Never change, Sarah!
Oh my God, the Iran part is PURE GOLD. The more high profile the interview, the more high profile the backcomb. Also, her eyes cross ever so slightly more when she is tryin’ to be all eruditin’ but really just bullshittin’! I love her so much, especially when I am drunk. Just like her husband!
[re=503149]AxmxZ[/re]:
……SATAN?
Channeling the Church Lady, sorry.
GOP: Ummm who hasn’t had a sex scandal lately? The new guy? McConnell, McDonnell something? Yeah, put him up there with some generic talking points about big government. And it doesn’t matter that he didn’t watch the SOTU, no one’s watching him.
Why would you even have a governor respond to the president, as if he actually gets a say in this, because…you know…federalism?
Not a governor… a would-be, inept, quitter governor!
[re=503260]schadenfreudian slip[/re]: Was there an especially good part, or do I have to watch the whole thing to get the full effect?
lol…sarah palin’s idea of empowering the people is making women buy their own rape kits…seriously, “empowering families and businesses” translates directly to: tax cuts for rich people and corporations. God I love this dingbat…wish I could make sweet love to every moment she speaks…it’s like listening to trig give an SOU…maybe that apple didn’t fall far from teh tree. “Words spoken that may not be true” coming from Palin? hahahaha…pallin with terwrists and “death panels”…say it beotch, say ittttt! okay, so I’m late to the party mainly because I missed the SOU…but most importantly I get to see sean hannity feed the snowbilly soft balls and watch her foul them off…why do I get the idea that everytime palin says “government takeover” bill o’reilly’s leg kicks and his loofa gets wet? also..is it just me or will sean hannity and beckerhead have a duel soon for the role of sista sarah’s designated ass kisser?
Well…I don’t know much about the SOU since I was studying soviet russian history during it (coincidence? glenn beck would say no)…I just want Sarah Palin to get together with Bush on a ticket…like back when idiots were joking that Bill could be Hillary’s veep…greatest teamup ever!
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