About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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Hola wonkerados.

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  1. SmutBoffin

    Remember when McCain said ACORN’s voter registration effort “is now on the verge of maybe perpetrating one of the greatest frauds in voter history in this country, maybe destroying the fabric of democracy”? Wellwellwell, now that the curtain has been pulled aside, what do we find?


    Why are you stealing democracy, Wonkett?

  2. El Pinche

    O’Keefe will be alright in prison. He has a purty and fuckable mouth. Those guys are like gold in the pen.

  3. Gopherit

    Hey, ACORN. No offense, but how the fuck did you fall for this stupid punk and his lame-ass pimp outfit?

  4. edgydrifter

    [re=501503]Gopherit[/re]: No shit. Either the ACORNs are hella retarded, or… wait, it all makes sense now–ACORN is a massive false-flag operation to subvert the librul agenda! Must go buy canned goods and ammo now.

  5. Sharkey

    #trucknuts #bagodicks #blingee @mccainblogette #twattery
    #cheapviagra #freealcohol ah hell that’s enough, right?

  6. Terry


    He looked like a frat boy dressed up for their annual Pimps and Ho’s party

  7. glamourdammerung

    [re=501507]edgydrifter[/re]: If I recall, there was something about dubbed in audio which was part of the reason there is going to be a court case about this.

  8. ThisIsNotAnAvatar

    Your mission, as you apparently see it, is to make an ass of yourself over and over again.

  9. hoosiermama

    [re=501514]Jim89048[/re]: I was about to yell for a link and then discovered this thing called Google. Here’s an article by Tommy Christopher at Mediaite. Breitbart sounds like a total douchebag in this story.

  10. doxastic

    Just when you think O’Keefe has reached the fuckwit nadir, he says “the truth shall set me free” when leaving the courthouse.

  11. imissopus

    [re=501529]hoosiermama[/re]: Breitbart sounds like a total douchebag in every story about him ever.

    [re=501512]glamourdammerung[/re]: Don’t know if it’s the same case you’re thinking of but the director of Philly’s ACORN office is suing O’Keefe and his partner because state law prohibits recording and disseminating oral communications without the consent of all recorded parties. I think.

  12. Escape Goat Nation

    First we have to assume that Karl Rove, Rush Limbaugh, Rupert Murdoch and Sarah Palin directly funded and ordered him to do this.

    Next we waterboard him until he admits it.

    There’s absolutely nothing wrong with this. It’s not torture. It’s just little drops or water on his head. It doesn’t even make a mark…right? Who knows, maybe he knows of another plot organized by Karl Rove, Rush Limbaugh, Rupert Murdoch and Sarah Palin that may kill 1,000s of Americans. I really don’t think we have any other choice but to waterboard him. American lives may be on the line. We need to err on the side of caution.

  13. coolcatdaddy

    You know, Watergate started with a simple little third-rate burglary.

    However, I’ve seen G. Gordon Liddy. And you, sir, are no G. Gordon Liddy.

  14. desertwind

    Did you see the what O’Douche yelled outside the courthouse? “Veritas. … The trust shall set us free!” For real.

    So, the judge let three of them leave court & said they can spend the night at the same place but they “can’t talk about the case”….

    The FBI wiretaps their safe house and records: “Ixnay on the alkintay on our asecay, my otherbrays in imecray.” and “We bad. We super bad.” and “Up the revolution!” and “Jesus, my daddy’s gonna be pissed.” There was also a few cries of “Mama!”

  15. desertwind

    PS — I wanna know more about the fourth guy arrested a few blocks away with monitoring device in his car.

    H ha ha ha.

  16. Long Form Def Certificate

    Why must O’Keefe make it impossible for me to be a white man in this society? After this story, everybody is going to assume I’m a no-good, wire-tapping fake-pimp, too.

  17. Crank Tango

    [re=501557]Long Form Def Certificate[/re]: well maybe you should ditch the fur coat and shit. Also the toolbox with “ma bell” sharpied onto it.

  18. Radiotherapy

    [re=501509]El Pinche[/re]: My comment back to you was originally something like this: Maybe who should be pilloried here is the pussified, pandering Dems who voted to defund Acorn based on this amateur-hour, Uckraking stunt. The votes were around 83-7 and 340-70.
    But as I was looking around it appears that the actual defunding never occurred because of the usual congressional budgetary loophole language. Secondly, there seems to be a court injunction against the defunding as well. I’m like, fucking cool, these wingtards put on a show and it had no teeth. Where’s Fox and the teabuggers now!

  19. Darkness

    [re=501503]Gopherit[/re]: His appointment was sandwiched between a strung out half-dressed ex-hooker needing help filing her taxes and a trannie in a pushup bra and bright pink evening gown having trouble with her landlord. Honestly, the guy probably didn’t stand out as much as you might think.

  20. glamourdammerung

    Don’t know if it’s the same case you’re thinking of but the director of Philly’s ACORN office is suing O’Keefe and his partner because state law prohibits recording and disseminating oral communications without the consent of all recorded parties. I think.

    That was part of it and editing the clips were another part of it.

  21. Up To Here Again

    Secret men’s room cameras reveal giant republican butt cracks spewing forth “only actual truth” ever to come out from any republican orifice.

    As our trolling tea baggers have discovered the internets,
    and join us in our fireside rants against our Dr Jekel and Mr Hyde leaders,
    still they can’t help but fart in our midst – usually on the first “sally” –
    and give themselves away completely with their simpleton misinformation.

    Hidden camera shows tea bag idiot picking both nostrils at the same time.
    Watch him strugglee to operate both hands simultaneusly!

    As progressives and others of the soul singed left
    wash up on the opposite shores from Hope,
    we see how far the mighty have fallen,
    how pathetic our leaders have become,
    how dire the situation we are slipping into,
    and how so much the more because of all this,
    everyone just wants to hear bigger and bigger lies.

    Tiny nano penis camera snuck into Big Party Sex Bash.
    You won’t BELIEVE who is breaking our sex laws!

  22. artbot2000


    Wrong way around:Rove was Segretti’s protege (repuglicanese for Butt Boy).

  23. Mr Blifil

    [re=501484]memzilla[/re]: Rove is the younger, therefore he would be the protogé. Segretti coined the term “rat fucking” I believe, which seems to be what our brave, non-military-serving young conservative heroes were engaging in.

  24. hunter.blatherer

    I’m so glad ACORN’s on our side! Now if we can only get Cindy McCain we’ll be golden. If we all gay marry each other will she like us?

  25. brown_recluse

    I’d give my meager fortune to hear a reporter, ANY reporter ask these chuckleheads this question:
    “So, think we’re too good for the military, don’t we?”

  26. sleptwithyetti

    I just saw that same guy in the WIKIPEDIA look it up on the inter webs site.
    His picture is in the callosity file. so like wikup Callosity LOL
    Monkey rump Beavis.

  27. El Pinche

    Briebart’s new site next week, “Big Dungeon: A Center/Right Perspective as a Dungeon Bitch”

    [re=501598]Mr Blifil[/re]: He’s taking comments at his other shitty biggubment site.

  28. Bearbloke

    [re=501535]Escape Goat Nation[/re]: You betcha! There’s none of that pre-9/11 thinking here – that’s change I can believe in!

  29. Lionel Hutz Esq.

    [re=501488]american mutt[/re]: Yes, we need context, just like FOX News gave Van Jones and Anita Dunn.

    [re=501534]imissopus[/re]: You spend a decade blowing Matt Drudge and Sean Hannity, and see what happens to you.

  30. Oh hell to the no

    Am I the only person who thinks the Siemen’s background is quite relevant today. Did you guys plan this tribute to The Faux-Blue-Collar Comedy Tour’s workers?

  31. Radiotherapy

    [re=501619]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Yeah, but a lot of these domestic-tearist/Jacob Riis wannabes are gonna eat alot of the right wing crow.

  32. glamourdammerung

    [re=501622]Radiotherapy[/re]: Is “right wing crow” some kind of slang for forced oral sex in prison?

  33. Newbeedobee

    Do you think O’keefe teamed up with a friend in disguise for the State Dinner as well? Just askin’

  34. ForTheTurnstiles

    [re=501621]Oh hell to the no[/re]: Oh, that and the Oden pictures are legit. Rip City! Bingo Bango Bongo, Baby… Siemens answers at work!

  35. AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=501628]Newbeedobee[/re]: I hadn’t thought of that, but that’s a brilliant theory.

    Also, I would just like to thank these fine young gentlemen for making yesterday and today a bit more bearable than the past few weeks.

  36. zenferret

    [re=501482]I-man[/re]: Neigh!!!!

    [re=501484]memzilla[/re]: Segretti was the Mentour. Or something like that. Does this mean Segretti took a tour of the budding pudginess that was Rove back then?

  37. Zulu

    What a wonderful way to perk up a depressing last two weeks. Keep them coming Repulsicans! BTW I checked down at the club…Stepping Razor, yeah…Goldie,that works….Slick…um, well every second pimp has that name. But O’Keefe…now,that’s a fucked up name for a pimp!

  38. 102415

    Yesterday was a very special day for our family of acornists and oaktrees. Cokierobertsgate hahaha. And I must add that having donated a couple of weeks work in an Acorn office down south back in 2004, some of the people working there may have rightly assumed that is what a white, right-wing pimp would look like and were simply being polite.
    I think we need to check for previous criminal activity on the part of O’Keefe and his entourage.
    Maybe Foxnews is doing that right now. Oh, wait…let’s just stick with Cokie Roberts.

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