Persons familiar with the Iron Chef competition, which is a thing where cooks try to make whipped pike souffles with saffron mousse and venison dumplings in 20 minutes, were thrilled to find out that the White House would be somehow debase itself in conjunction with this competition last night on the teevee. So here was the deal: Michelle Obama invited four intrepid chefs to her House and demanded that they make a delicious meal for her using scraps from her magical garden. The entire affair was beneath the dignity of the White House, which in the past has hosted such luminaries as a soothsayer, a sweatered mummy, and a fornicating intern.
The contestants: White House chef Cristeta Comerford, a man called Bobby Flay, a large orange troll, and a Cajun hobbit. In the end, Comerford and Flay beat the troll and the hobbit by making a bunch of seafood dishes. (Question: RIGGED FOR THE HOME TEAM???) And this is exactly the way that the Philippines will quietly take over all of America: through healthful cookery involving lemongrass, fresh vegetables, and animals from the sea.
Filipina White House cook wins ‘Iron Chef’ [ABS-CBS North America]
Michelle Obama appears on ‘Iron Chef America'; ‘Worst Cooks in America’ premieres [Washington Post]