People with nothing better to do on New Year’s Eve love watching Dick Clark propped up in Times Square as a giant crystal ball full of even more crystal (but not meth!) is slowly lowered from … some kind of pulley, we figure? We only watched this once, when we were about nine years old, and our assumption was, obviously, that the “fucking thing had broken, on New Year’s Eve of all fucking nights,” but then Grandpa said that’s how it’s supposed to work, and then everybody started weeping in the night. ANYWAY: The company who makes the annual New Year’s Rockin’ Eve crystal shards has gone bankrupt, in 2009, yay Waterford Crystal! [True/Slant]
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{ 78 comments }
Waterford Crystals, Philips LEDs, Whore Diamonds, what’s the difference?
They should drop the trouser-bomber instead. He doesn’t deserve a trial. Not because he tried to blow up an airliner, but because the rest of us are going to be punished for CIA/NSA data-hording.
I’m actually optimistic about the upcoming decade.
They ought to just let it hit the fuckin’ ground this time.
[re=487560]V572625694[/re]: Make that “hoarding.”
I don’t really want to think about how the next decade could be worse than this last one, so in true Amurkin fashin, I’m going to stick my head in the sand and pretend the next 10 years will be AWESOME.
Also, I bought 4 bottles of Hobo Sparkling Wine for tonight, to do the drinking with my family. Just in case Y2K is 10 years late.
I’ve always enjoyed watching Dick Clark’s balls drop.
[re=487563]Hedley Lamar[/re]: Going to Times Sq. for New Years used to be kind of fun. Get drunk, get high, watch the ball drop. Kiss some random people. Get drunker and higher. Take the subway, fight off a mugger, go home. Good times.
I wish Waterford/Wedgewood China had been bankrupt before I got married. We might have gotten some useful shit at all those showers.
[re=487562]gurukalehuru[/re]: I’ll trust your judgment on this. You’ve always been right before.
One of the few things I enjoy about New Year’s Eve–other than the drankin’–is hearing so many people on TV repeatedly say “ball drop.”
Ball drop = Teabagger
[re=487569]x111e7thst[/re]: This is a true thing. I last did this in 1985 and it was maybe the most awesome New Year’s Eve ever. Took the subway back to Queens and slept off the booze for a day.
Anyone watch that film of the ball being prepared for tonight? I always thought that thing was about the size of a basketball. It’s huge! I’m kind of dumb that way though.
OH MY GOD A SECOND GIANT CRYSTAL BALL JUST CRASHED INTO TIMES SQUARE
[re=487576]Clancy_Pants[/re]: How did you know??? Tonight in bluer than blue C’Addle they’ll be dropping teabaggers off the Space Needle to welcome the New Year.
[re=487579]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: substitute “crystal shards” for “public hairs” and it starts to make sense.
[re=487569]x111e7thst[/re]: So true. I worked at a recording studio in the early 90′s on Times Square and we had a huge party on the roof. The amount of people that used to get in there was staggering and unruly and really fun; as were we by the time the ball dropped. We all passed out in different studios until the sun came up and then commenced to staggering to our alloted ant farm apartments. Best NYE evah!
[re=487577]Ken Layne[/re]: 1985? What, were you 12? You’re a sprightly thirtysomething, Papa Bear!
I just remember last year when Anderson Cooper was hosting live with Kathy Griffith. A bunch of boneheads started jeering off camera and Griffith yelled back, “Come on guys, we’re working here! It’s not like I come over to where you work and slap the dicks out of your mouths!”
I hope Baby SKS doesn’t go out in the nasty weather to see this spectacle. He’d be better off in a dark bar in Brooklyn.
I’ve been watching those retarded Australians on the news today. Those dumbasses have already shot off their fireworks and everything like it’s midnight already. Geesh.
[re=487577]Ken Layne[/re]: [re=487589]freakishlystrong[/re]: ok now I’m starting to feel sorry for myself. Fukking oughts.
But hey Happy New Year
[re=487601]Cape Clod[/re]: Is that a true story? If so, I’m going to have to like her a little bit.
let the balls drop — tonight, we’re all damn dogs, yeah!
Just glad that this sad excuse for a decade is finally almost over. The Zeroes will go down like the 30s, but without the good leader to get us through the shit for most of the decade. One thing that’s annoying right now – many people making decade retrospectives keep referring to it as the “aughts”. Ugh, no, that is an incredibly stupid name; just because people used it for the 1900s doesn’t mean we should call it by an unused archaic word like that.
[re=487592]Vulpes82[/re]: The drinking age was EIGHTEEN back then (or maybe had just changed to 21 and nobody was paying attention because who cares), and this meant any teenager with a few dollars could buy booze ANYWHERE in New York City, with no hassle at all. It was magical.
Even minus the bankrupt ball, Times Square on New Years is an awesome metaphor. Combination of a police state and Main Street at Disneyworld.
In the waning hours of 2009 we should make time to disparage the man who gave us Sarah Palin.
Waterford Crystal may be bankrupt, but Bill Kristol is morally bankrupt.
Boy, as a writer I suck. No wonder I can’t get Ken Layne’s job. And who knew he was from Queens?
I should probably have started drinking early.
Well, shoot. My bus drops me off in Times Square at 9:00 tonight.
In Nashville they will be dropping Crystal Gayle at midnight (maybe next year NYC could drop Billy Crystal).
I would like to see Southern California drop the Crystal Cathedral at midnight, but ain’t gonna happen. Hey, they employ a slew of musicians, so it’s not all bad.
[re=487605]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Let’s hope they don’t ‘spoil’ it for us. I want to be surprised tonight!
[re=487619]Ken Layne[/re]: I went to SUNY Stony Brook back when pot was practically legal on campus. Kids left it growing on their windowsills in the dorms and no one ever got busted. Good times.
[re=487610]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Never liked her much either until this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmJ-LBarTVM
Matter of fact, since Australia an’em are already in 2010, can’t someone ask them what it’s like? Is it everything we’re hoping for? Has the world changed for the better yet? Isare the war(s)over? Last, but not least, did Rush lose his battle with life?
The BBCs today had their pronunciation editor on, actively debating the proper pronunciation of how you say 2010. Options:
-Twenty ten (format we had in the 19xxs)
-Two thousand ten
-Two thousand and ten
Conclusion: the BBC hasn’t made up their mind yet and will go with the flow.
This being said, the 200xs are being referred to as the “noughties” which I kind of like.
[re=487647]DirtyHarriett[/re]: “Is/are”!!!11!
[re=487619]Ken Layne[/re]: Anyone who ever gets proofed in NYC buying booze is a sucka or going to tourist places.
[re=487618]JMP[/re]: I always thought “pre-teens” was the most apposite reference … shame it never caught on.
[re=487562]gurukalehuru[/re]: I agree, because it cannot be worse.
[re=487648]Bruno[/re]: Some rather annoying friends of mine have been saying “two-oh-whatever” every year this decade. Like “two-oh-nine” for this bad awful year we’re exiting now. I’ve tried for nine years to understand this, or to correct this, to no avail. Now that it’s almost 2010 and their idiotic “two-oh” meme might actually make some sense, I’m sure they’ll come up with something else, something even more retarded.
I need new friends.
So does this mean that Waterford might become even remotely affordable? ‘Cause right now it costs me $225 to replace one goddamned wine glass. No wonder they went bankrupt.
[re=487655]Jim89048[/re]: You know I had never even thought about the “Noughties” as a decade at all like the 80s 90s etc until about a month ago or whenever that Time cover story about the shittiest decade ever. It’s probably because I never knew what to name it. Even in movies, TV, etc people weren’t self referring to the decade like the previous ones – perhaps because they were so obsessed about the 2000s?
Anyway, sorry no snark
Just in time for tonight the Colorada Department of Transportation has released a free iPhone app that determines your blood alcohol content. You plug in your weight, gender, number of drinks, and how long you’ve been drinking (I tried to enter “since I was 12″ before I figured they want to know how much consumed that particular morning).
Turns out I’ve been way too cautious all these years. It takes a lot to get to 0.08%.
It’s called “R U Buzzed?”. Enjoy.
[re=487650]Bruno[/re]: Not in California. They card any one, any time, any place. My 65 year old grand dad got carded in RiteAid in San Diego. They don’t take no crap from no one.
[re=487562]gurukalehuru[/re]: How is it going to be better? Give me some examples….even if you have to lie. I want to be hopeful again.
This decade of feces will be a piece of cake come the year 2012.
An Inca warrior told me so.
We should really just stick with the “Ohs” because every time we turned around it was, “Oh shit!” “Oh no!” “Oh damn!”
Dick Clark: still fuckin’ that chicken.
Happy New Year to Russia! (Too bad it no longer exists.)
[re=487655]Jim89048[/re]: One hundred years ago, it was nineteen-oh-nine. It’s currently twenty-oh-nine. Tomorrow, it will be twenty-ten. If anyone disagrees, I suggest that society spend the next 90 years fighting about this issue. It’ll be a nice distraction from the current round of fighting.
Anybody puke into a potted plant? Anybody where a lamp shade on his head? That was New Years fucking Eve at La Casa Roscoe, where the gin martini never went out of style in the early 80′s.
[re=487671]Come here a minute[/re]: Did Obama hit the “launch” button? I didn’t hear anything about that on CNN.
Happy new decade, all. It’s got to be better.
Ain’t it funny how even though those balls just keep dropping, collectively we never seem to get beyond the edge of puberty.
Actually, all the baaaaaaaawing about how terrible the 00′s were looks pretty hilarious to me – but then, I’ve got enough mad history skillz to have a pretty good idea where we’re all heading (possibly much sooner than anyone realizes). By 2019, 2009 is going to be looking a lot like The Good Old Days.
I fear the decade now dying may be the last truly easy one we ever have – you know, living in Fat City where there’s still heaps of food in the stores, water still comes out of the tap more or less safe to drink, & the power still comes on at the flick of a switch.
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
[re=487605]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: [re=487640]DirtyHarriett[/re]: [re=487647]DirtyHarriett[/re]:
Happy New Decade Everyone, from the People’s-Still-Above-Sea-Level-Republic of Antipodia!!
As I’m speaking from The Future I’m constrained in what I can say, but let leave you with this:
Rush Hudson Fatnazishitsack Limbaugh III 1951 – 201*
“Talent on loan from God, squandered in service to Satan “
[re=487653]tcb[/re]: for the record, methinks “pre-teens” is/was brilliant. pass it on…
Just over 7 1/2 hours left of 2009…C’mon Rush, we need hopeful sign to start the new year.
I was a lonely refugee from the old Cruel.com site when I first found Wonkette, and the snark and humor has sustained me through the latter half of the 00′s (especially the last 8 unemployed months). Now, a new year and (hooray) a new job! Thanks, Wonketteers. Don’t ever change.
[re=487665]hockeymom[/re]: Some cool gadgets, for sure. Gotta be some cool music. 3D films. A bullet train from Vegas to Disneyland. Discovery of Earth like planets. A cure for AIDS. Charles Grassley dies. Sarah Palin continues to say insanely retarded stuff.
HAPPY FUCKING WONKETTE, NEW YEAR!!1
[re=487691]lulzmonger[/re]: Wars and rumours of wars? Seven-horned beasts? The Whore of Babylon? Is this really the End of Times, or do things just suck?
Times Square — what an awful/great movie.
[re=487691]lulzmonger[/re]: haha, you make it sound like it all hasn’t happened, yet. That’s cute.
[re=487569]x111e7thst[/re]: I remember the old Times Sq. The hindu owned porn shops would stay open on this day, and street people were always selling drugs or sex near the bus station. And despite all the punching and robbing, people could actually meet real people, play games and have fun. Now they only sell junk food to fat, diabetic children who aspire to become like their body-snatched pod parents whose souls were sucked out thru there cell phones. But the only thing that hasn’t changed .. bridge and tunnel. Pardon the rant.
[re=487718]DC Hates Me[/re]: Is that a Burroughs rant or a Mailer rant?
I’m trying to figure out which American Dream you’re lamenting the death of…
[re=487570]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: When the fuck did the g**damn Irish buy out my china company? I bought most of my shit myself, after I dumped the first husband. The one who wouldn’t work. Wedgewood bone china, Royal Daulton Crystal and Towle sterling flatware.
I assume all those companies are bankrupt. Thank goodness for replacements.com. Sometimes, (on rare occasions) God is good.
[re=487577]Ken Layne[/re]: That’s wierd ‘cuz I plan to get drunk in Queens and sleep it off in Times Square. Merry New Year, Wonketeers!
[re=487654]Humpback[/re]: “because it cannot be worse”
Heed this warning from an oldster, my young friend: things can always get worse. You can take that one to the bank, after Geitner bails it out.
In spite of being punchy from lack of sleep, I have to go downtown with the old man for the Ball Drop. (Teeheehee). He’s the Chamber of Commerce manager (and, as far as I know, the only socialist Chamber guy on the planet). It’s a big chicken wire ball with Xmas lights that spell out the new year that they lower from the flag pole while people do a countdown–not precisely in unison. Since Mother(fucker) Nature has chosen to turn our tiny burg into a frozen hellscape, I don’t think there will be a big turnout or that it will last long. Good.
And while we’re on the subject of the dawn of 2010: Of all the losers in my life in this loser of a decade, none have given me more laughs than the wonkeratti. Thank you all, and the editors, for being my online-lifeline when the Republics have driven me to the point of suicide.
[re=487724]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Sorry darling. I didn’t know until today that Waterford and Wedgewood were the same outfit. Not sure where in OK you live but if you’re on the eastern side and want to drive on over to Arkansas I just dropped a few hundred $ for booze and shrimp for tonights party. Come on over and you can have all the shit you want that’s not available on replacement.com.
[re=487734]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Party with an Arky? Awesome. I won’t be making it across the border, but the invite is most appreciated. Frankly, I just want to pop a Lunesta, go to bed and read one of my Xmas books. I mean books that were given to me for Xmas, not Luke or Matthew or Dickens.
[re=487610]Chernobyl Soup[/re]: Yes, it’s true, I was watching at the time and spit out my alcohol…
Happy New Year, Ken and all the Wonketts! Going into the new year a dork…
[re=487702]gurukalehuru[/re]: First off you have kale in your moniker. That is the green leaf I am addicted to. So I eat it instead of smoking it, but whatevs.
Then you go and post these messages of flaming rosy hope and now I have to love you. Tongue in cheeky sarcasm or no. This is bad for snarking, you know. I mean hells I had a job, a home and food to eat for every single day of 2009 and expect twenty ten to be even better so I am feeling the hope.
I can feel it. And if any balls start dropping near me, I promise to give them a little scoop scoop.
[re=487618]JMP[/re]: Konoe? Stalin? Mussolini? Hitler?
You can’t mean FDR, right?
MacDonald/Baldwin/Chamberlain?
Best movie soundtrack ever. Bought the double album at a grocery store bargain bin for $1.99 in Rochester New York. Here’s to you, Dr. Zamansky, you cold heart holy man, you don’t know what makes me tick”
[re=487867]ph7[/re]: Me too. Love that album. “Your Daughter is one!”
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