After being told that his beloved Nebraska would become the nation’s new raw-sewage & nuclear waste repository, Senator Ben Nelson suddenly decided he “likes the health care bill a super-whole lot!” So now maybe it has 60 votes, hooray! Libtards everywhere are preparing to spend the holidays chooching, as the current revised version of the Senate bill “would expand coverage to about 94 percent of eligible Americans under age 65.” [New York Times/ABC News]
Hola wonkerados.
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Nebraska would become the nation’s new raw-sewage & nuclear waste repository
Ken, I respectfully challenge your choice of verb tense here. Present is clearly more appropriate.
“chooching”– that’s a new one to me. Can’t say I can relate– this bill is nothing to wank over.
This “Deantard” is very upset that the bill didn’t send every insurance salesman to hell. I say kill the bill until everyone gets free boob jobs.
His pee told him to do it.
Way to remind me that I need a new Siemens.
You know Lieberman only said he would vote yes when he though the bill had a snows balls chance in hell. I predict within the hour he’ll find something else in the bill to object to.
[re=482347]Formerly Fred[/re]: Lieberman can dial 1-800-blow-me
“…the current revised version of the Senate bill ‘would expand coverage to about 94 percent of eligible Americans under age 65.’”
Yes, and I have a plan to provide a pony to EVERY American — by forcing them to buy one from the national pony lobby or face crushing fines. When do I get my Nobel?
What is the term for masturbating while burning a pile of fetuses?
This health care bill is working out kind of like a backwards Charlie Brown Christmas tree. It started out life full and glorious yet the longer congress messes with it the more parched and barren it becomes. Oh well, the health care lobby really got their moneys worth.
We had our injections of live Obama DNA this morning and so far we’re all feeling normal. I was worried, since this is a 90% Republican county and the ramps leaving the high school would go directly onto the “Death Trains” waiting to take us to ACORN slave labor camps.
But apparently it was just a flu shot.
No matter what gets passed it will eventually be modified to do what was originally intended to do.
Originally, as passed in 1937, Social Security was supposed to be only one lump sum payment to the primary worker. Regular ongoing monthly benefits started in January 1940. In 1956 disability benefits were added. Medicare was passed into law in 1965.
Baby steps.
Whew — glad the hard part’s over. Now all that needs to happen is for the House and Senate to agree on a final version that’ll pass both bodies — which might mean that Harry Reid has to basically go through this whole process again or else use the technique that overrides a filibuster — the nuclear option. It’s kinda like watching a blind pig kayaking down the Colorado River — I’m not liking the odds, but I’m rooting like hell for that pig.
Nice deal, Mr. Ben Nelson. Some abortion thing and lots of cash for Nebraska! Let’s all move there, claim Medicaid, and open the world’s largest Abortion Clinic, with free abortions for all.
[re=482350]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: I got my hands on a box of them, but then again I know the right people. For you I’ve got a limited-time, low adjustable rate deal–own your own Nobel today for just 30 pieces of silver.
Professional opinions – what are the odds this monstrous thing will be improved in conference? After all, as badly as the Senate has screwed it up, it can only get better from here, right? Right????
[re=482352]Mr Blifil[/re]: Chabortorching?
[re=482352]Mr Blifil[/re]: Oh, wait. I want a do-over. It’s PROGRESSIVE!
[re=482352]Mr Blifil[/re]: The Winter Solstice party at Nancy Pelosi’s place.
I’m about to find out if blasting off with some newly arrived killer herb will help me forget about the crooks and liars for a few hours. Even if I lose, I win.
[re=482352]Mr Blifil[/re]: [re=482364]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Beat-Off Baby-Cue?
I think chooching pretty much describes the whole– yay Senate for passing this! Boo Senate for passing this!
Actually, I’m not counting HCR done yet as we’ve seen this movie way too many times– after thinking the villain has been vanquished, the hero joyfully wanders around only to discover that the horrific monsters Freddy Lieberman, Ben Myers, and new bad guy Jason Stupak have risen from the grave to once again threaten death and destruction. Or maybe that’ll happen in the the Sequels “The Senate III- Cap and Trade: James Inhofe Strikes Back ” and “The Senate IV: Financial Reform- the Return of Joe.”
The Nebraskans needed reassurance about this whole socialism thing. Well, in addition to the massive existing reassurance provided by jobs from military installations and agricultural subsidies.
In Soviet Nebraska, taxes pay YOU!
[re=482361]HedonismBot[/re]: Well, I’m no professional (I just play one in my own mind) but no, it could get worse. If it turns out they pack the conference committee with politicians whose spouses, staff and lobbyists of choice are all whores for the insurance and drug industries … Oh, wait. They already did that. That’s how we got the Senate bill. So maybe it can’t get any worse. Still wouldn’t bet it will get much better.
Sigh. I just wish Harry Reid and Barry O had risen to the R. Lee Ermey standard and “… Wouldn’t have the goddamned common courtesy to give him a reacharound!”
I can’t help but remember the President saying he was determined to be the last president to try and bring about health care reform. However, this nationwide indentured servitude to the for-profit insurance companies pretty much guarantees that this will continue to be an infuriatingly contentious issue for all our lifetimes. Unless, of course, the US meets with a Soviet-style collapse, which if it happens while Obama is in office will be an orgasmically happy day for the “I hope he fails” crowd.
Basically, I’m feeling conflicted, except that I really hate Liebershit, Nelsmegma, and Harry-donged Reid.
[re=482370]user-of-owls[/re]: [re=482364]SayItWithWookies[/re]: You are all wrong. It’s called Mafterbirthing.
Conservatard senators are gnashing their teeth, a good sign. It’s not hard to imagine them huddled together tonight mumbling curses and scratching themselves like the mangy dogs they are.
[re=482357]Joshua Norton[/re]: Exactly. Newell & I had this basic conversation the other day: Once you’ve got ANY form of national health care, there is no going back and it will only increase in scope over time. Social Security and Medicare are obvious historical examples.
http://twitter.com/SarahPalinUSA/status/6823906156
As awful as I think this bill is, after reading Sarah Palin’s Twitter, and seeing her confuse “eons” with “ions,” I somehow can’t get too angry…
[re=482377]Mr Blifil[/re]: Friggin’ trick question. AND there’s no hint of flame-broiling. Poo, there goes my GPA.
[re=482382]Neo Atheist[/re]: Earth saw clmate chnge4 ions;will cont 2 c chnges.R duty2responsbly devlop resorces4humankind/not pollute&destroy;but cant alter naturl chng
I’ve only been able to machete my way through the first “sentence” of this, but best as I can tell, it’s some sort of coded recipe that calls for Clamato, positively charged molecules and 2 Cups of change.
[re=482384]user-of-owls[/re]: Mafterburnting?
[re=482382]Neo Atheist[/re]: Wow — that whirring sound you hear is Noah Webster, Strunk & White and generations of English teachers spinning in their graves.
[re=482386]ShiningMathPath[/re]: If you tweak it to Maßterburntung, Rand Paul’s former spokesman would probably be all over it.
[re=482379]Ken Layne[/re]: Please stop having “conversations” in non-Gchat-to-be-posted-later form. Also, please refrain from using “historical examples,” logic, etc. This often leads to “having a position” followed by “being less cranky” followed by “being less funny.” Only committed haters have true staying power.
Merry Christmas.
okay, who the fuck faps and cries? I must be old or something, but I can barely muster the energy to do either of those activities on a regular basis, let alone at the same time. And it’s not for lack of desire, on either count.
[re=482382]Neo Atheist[/re]: That sentence alone could qualify her as retarded.
I have only lived in three of these United States–NY, Florida and California. I have not yet tried the joys of Nebraska citizenship, so what the fuck do I know?
[re=482393]FlipOffResearch[/re]: That sentence alone could qualify her as retarded. No, it does qualify her as retarded.
[re=482393]FlipOffResearch[/re]: I remember reading that tweet and thinking, “Ions? What the fuck do ions have to do with anything?” Then I remembered, well, a lot really, because ions are everywhere, unless you happen to be one of those people that believe the Earth is only a few thousand years old and was at one time inhabited by both man and dinosaur at the same time. For THOSE people, I’m sure “ions” are a complete fucking mystery.
In other news: http://tinyurl.com/yetasq6 Billy Kristol projectile spewing words again, which gives me more hope than ever that the health care reform will end in some sort of substantial victory.
[re=482389]user-of-owls[/re]: I think you win – has Mr Blifil closed the contest?
[re=482388]SayItWithWookies[/re]: [re=482393]FlipOffResearch[/re]: [re=482396]Neo Atheist[/re]: UR TTLY 20C
[re=482397]I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO[/re]: “I went of course to Wikipedia.” Not to Conservapedia, Billy??? Fuckin’ RINO.
[re=482382]Neo Atheist[/re]: [re=482385]user-of-owls[/re]: That is what I like to call “high-functioning illiteracy”.
OK, so I missed out on that Hessians-4-Ron-Paul post. Dare I enter and witness what is surely a Paultard-infested shitstorm?
[re=482403]SmutBoffin[/re]: We had one or two show up, but they weren’t much fun.
[re=482385]user-of-owls[/re]:
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights…” – . Jefferson, 1776
“Four score and seven years ago, our fathers brought forth on this continent, etc.” – A. Lincoln, 1863
“We still on skedul/even workinWKEND” – C. Grassley, 2009
“R duty2responsbly devlop resorces4humankind/not pollute&destroy;but cant alter naturl chng” – S. Palin, 2009
Shit, Mike Judge had everything in “Idiocracy” right, except 500 years too late. We’re already there.
[re=482379]Ken Layne[/re]: Completely true. I just need to survive a couple more years and I can die real nice in hospital with a clean blanket and some morphine not dumped in the lobby of an ER. Please note that in 2014 I will get the Commie/Teabagging Medicare anyway so someone is real good with the maths.I still have me some hope and change though.
[re=482382]Neo Atheist[/re]: Her father is supposed to be a science teacher of some kind unless that is a lie, also. Strange people.
SRA PALIN QFI SSINF
If reacharounds were covered, I am sure that Lindsay Graham would have voted for it.
[re=482405]President Beeblebrox[/re]: *weeps* (but doesn’t jack off, you filthy choocheristas)
coochie coochie coo!
This whole HCR thing is at least proving that everyone has a price, and we’re just bickering about what it is. So far:
Landrieu: $300 large.
Nelson: Some fetuses.
Lieberman: Only The Hartford knows for sure.
[re=482342]Fox News Light[/re]: Spectacular ass jobs for the ladies in Brasil. We should import their surgeons (and their women too) and pay them with public funds. It’s all part of the pursuit of happiness.
[re=482352]Mr Blifil[/re]: A Bachmann
[re=482406]102415[/re]: Her father is supposed to be a science teacher of some kind unless that is a lie, also.
The kind that spends the whole school year trying to teach the Bible instead of science, and is never stopped, because no one on the school board believes in 19th 20th or 21st century science either, which is why he moved there?
I was working on a long post about why this is still a pretty good bill that will unequivocally help tens of millions of people at first and many more later, and that liberals and Democrats should be very proud of it — nt just a political victory either but an actual legislative one, in this the most difficult Congressional atmosphere EVER. (Not that it won’t shit on a segment of people for a little while, but hey, you want to go for universality? Everyone’s gonna have to fork out more than they’d like at first, and every first draft is going to produce its inequalities. Then you try to fix them! A weak opt-out public option would not have made a dent in this problem, although it still would’ve been super cool. THIS ISN’T EQUIVALENT TO INVADING AND PERMANENTLY RUINING IRAQ FOR NO REASON as that Kos blogger guy wrote, jesus)…
Anyway I stopped typing that post and watched teevee, meh.
[re=482425]mollymcguire[/re]: Reacharounds? Heck, if they added coverage for autoerotic asphyxiation, diaper fetishes, and anal bleaching, and they’d have the whole C-street gang in the bag.
[re=482451]JimNewell[/re]: That was so sad I cried white tears…
[re=482451]JimNewell[/re]: Any law that makes me pay money to an insurance company is the equivalent of making my grandmother have multiple abortions every day for a week. Fuck them all.
[re=482460]Mr Blifil[/re]: I’m pretty sure those aren’t tears.
I watched some teevee too and walked the dog, “Hooray, it’s snowing!” and then started looking up Chuck Heath out of boredom. The wing nut sites say he got a degree in science education and taught junior high and then he and his wife who used to be a catholic and then went heretic when they moved to Wasilla became wild life experts and were hired to shoot rats at the big dump while somebody else searched for body bits after 9/11. I have to wonder if this was all Bernie Kerik’s idea/fault or one of Judith Reagan’s media concept package deals.
Also I hope we are already planning a whatever happened to Katherine Harris, Jeff Gannon, Butterstick, Condi Rice, and the horrible old rich man with the hole in his sock, aughts best of extravaganza. Or not.
Metro shut down to the point where they only ran trains UNDERGROUND to the medical center. I am so glad I have up on walking to friendship heights.
But seriously, the trains are underground and the tunnels are 50 degrees! why the hell did they shut down?
YAY!
This means Obama won’t shit down the Army!
[re=482465]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: Ouch, sorry you only had to learn recently that this has been part of the plan for years and years. Who knew they would channel so much of a reform effort through the private sector, in America?
I swear to you, the Dems are not just including this for the sole purpose of enriching insurance executives. But I’m sorry that you thought Barack Obama was going to eliminate corporations in a political system that will require a constitutional amendment banning private party/campaign contributions to ever move beyond incrementalism. Guess you’ll just have to deal with that 60% premium reduction on the non-employer insurance exchange for now.
On the other hand… they DID include in this newest bill a pretty awesome thing: the right for states to earn a waiver opting out of the individual mandate and many other aspects of this bill IF they can present a better proposal for their own state. In other words, blue states can start toying around with single-payer. There’s your path to single-payer on the national level. It’s probably more likely to work than trying to “expand” from a small opt-out public option without bargaining power or a peg to Medicare rates that will be more expensive for young people to join.
[re=482382]Neo Atheist[/re]: ets so iasy to git the e’s and the i’s confusid.
[re=482382]Neo Atheist[/re]: iphones, email, ions, eons, its all just code to confuse us olds and they probably mean the same thing anyway.
[re=482473]Jim Newell[/re]: Seriously, thank you. I’m getting ridiculously tired of those who are trashing the bill because it doesn’t look the way they want it to look, like the extra thirty million people who will be covered by this bill really don’t matter. I think my favorite on this point lately has been John Cole who has been pointing out that the most vocal people against the bill are the ones who will still be covered after it.
Is it a flawed bill, fuck yes, but for everyone who thinks we should trash it and start over, I have to ask, what planet, or at least, what liberal dictatorship do you think you live on? THIS BILL had to be dragged kicking and screaming to sixty votes, what makes anyone think that a more liberal or, I’m sorry, “progressive” bill would have even half that chance of passage? And let’s not forget that Healthcare is not an easy battle to wage in the first place; when Clinton tried he failed and took Healthcare Reform off the table for nearly two decades.Prior to that I remember Kennedy remarking he wished he would have signed on to healthcare legislation back in the 60′s.
But this is what we do, not only can we snatch defeat from the jaws of victory, we can with a wave of an idealistic and inflexible wand make a win no better than a loss.
“Take what you can get and go back for more later” is as close to universally good advice as you’re going to encounter. If the blimped egos of Congress can just remember it for a little while longer…
“would expand coverage to about 94 percent of eligible Americans under age 65…”
…by mandating that those of the 94% that don’t currently have health insurance buy health insurance from the parasites that have raped this country blind for decades. Yah! Wrap a turd with a box, and guess what? Alas; it’s still very much a turd. Go figure, huh?
[re=482485]I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO[/re]: It’s not just a flawed bill, it’s fundamentally and fatally flawed and no matter how hard you try to pass this turn and pretends that it doesn’t hurt is a apologist fanboy.
[re=482465]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: “Any law that makes me pay money to an insurance company is the equivalent of making my grandmother have multiple abortions every day for a week.”
Think of it like a tax, an earmarked tax that can’t be used to bomb brown people. And the ‘skim 10% off the top’ trough is public knowledge rather than behind the scenes.
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[re=482497]LowerdPeninsula[/re]: If you’re going to take a swipe at me, can you at least have the common decency to do so in a cogent sentence. Only, I’ve spent half the night trying to figure out exactly what it is you are trying to say and have only come away with the fact that I’m a fanboy because I turn passages or something by default.
I mean, really, if you want to punish insurance agencies, sorry, it’s a bad bill. If you want to cover people who aren’t covered it does that. Me, I don’t have a hard on to punish insurance companies, so I’m going with the whole, “it covers more people,” thing.
[re=482473]Jim Newell[/re]: I really wish most Americans actually paid attention in history classes. They might know that our foundational document – the “sacred” Constitution – was a bastard of a compromise that fundamentally offended large swaths of people from all parts of the political spectrum. It was an overt rejection of anything close to philosophical purity, trashing both Montesque’s views that only “small republics” could succeed and the overwhelmingly popular notion that governmental powers must truly be seperate rather than interrelated. Even then, it was so bitterly contested in ratification that it took years of struggle to adopt, and then only on a promise to consider the proposals that eventually became Amendments 1-10 (and 27, 200 years later). It largely passed only because the Federalists (in the sense of being pro-passage) came together to knock down every counter argument from a group of opposition who were light years ahead of the HCR opposition in prestige and intelligence. And even then it just set the stage for the 220+ years of arguing over the proper scope of our government that ensued.
Can you imagine if, instead of banding together, the pro-Constitution forces had ripped the document for not being a pure endorsement of classic republicanism (small r) – y’know, Senate domination of most choices, powers of executive sharply limited outside of absolute crises, no distinct judiciary, etc.? No way does ratification happen.
Then again, we never would have had to put up with douchebags like Lieberman and Nelson hijacking the whole country for their private interest (much less a-holes like Cornyn, Inhofe, Coburn, DeMint and Graham), so maybe its a wash.
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[re=482518]aqwhxn5555[/re]: [re=482550]jacklang0002[/re]:
You’re barking up the wrong tree fucko. You’ll have much more success trolling here:
http://www.parcbench.com
[re=482556]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: OH well done.
[re=482556]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: Wow, what a sucktastic site. Was it supposed to be teh funnee, or was it just another epically failed attempt at conservative humor?
Conservative humor? Is that where you laugh all “Hur-hur-hurhhh”-like? Then hack and spit?
[re=482357]Joshua Norton[/re]: Good points, you.
All I wanna know is can we raise the red flag over D.C. on Christmas?
[re=482567]GeneralLerong[/re]: Typical conservative joke:
Why do liberals hate Christmas?
Because the abortion clinics are closed, the churches are open, and hardly anyone works so the government can’t collect our hard earned money.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Just so everyone knows, the bill doesn’t actually make you buy insurance in the sense that other laws make you drive on the right side of the road or make you not stab people. If you are one of the handful of people who can afford insurance but enjoy perpetually living on the brink of financial ruin, you can always just pay the tax penalty.
And just so everyone knows this too, just about all those 30,000,000 who will be covered aren’t people who can get insurance but are holding out until that wonderful future day when John Q. Poliscimajor gets to handle the administrative paperwork. And just about all those 26 kos and Hamsher readers who think this bill is the worst thing since sliced Hitler would shart their sweatpants if someone threatened to take away their private health benefits.
But to counter Barry’s disingenuous argument from the primaries, it’s not that we need a mandate because those people don’t want insurance (they do). The mandate is necessary to prevent people from gaming the system after we ban medical history discrimination. Now, you’ll still be able to run around without insurance if you want, but you’ll still need to indirectly pay into the system to ensure that you’ve helped cover your fair share of the costs when you do find that tumor and decide it’s time to sign up for an insurance plan.
[re=482357]Joshua Norton[/re]: Are you telling me I could’ve gotten disability when I was 4 years old, rather than waiting until now? Damn, I wasted my life working…
Learning a new word brings me to tears and orgasm.
[re=482473]Jim Newell[/re]: True, that. Just because there are terrible compromises doesn’t mean this isn’t a step forward.
[re=482349]I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO[/re]: why would he call me?
I’ve now heard 2 East Coast broadcasters blather about Ben Nighthorse Nelson.
I guess all that land really is flyover country.
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