david broder is going to *flip out*

Television Comedian Franken Shuts Up Heroic Senator/President Lieberman

Here’s a brief respite of procedural porn & violence for the very sad American Left: Joe Lieberman babbles about some terrible thing for his 10 minutes, Al Franken refuses to give him any additional time, Joe Lieberman shruggeth, “How Dare You, Rape Joke Clown,” and yet again freaking John McCain rises to cast judgment on something that doesn’t involve him. The video cuts off before we see Lindsey Graham burst into the chamber, breathless, clutching a blinking red beeper, declaring, “ACTION FORCE TEAM MEMBER 3 ON LOCATION READY FOR BATTLE.” UPDATE: After the jump, a blockquote and perhaps a sentence or two of commentary!

Sen. Carl Levin (D-Mich.) quickly corrected McCain, saying that the same thing happened earlier in the afternoon.

He was referring to an attempt by Sen. John Cornyn of Texas (R.) to extend remarks by two minutes. Mark Begich (D-Alaska) was presiding at that moment, and objected. When Cornyn pointed out that there was no one else waiting to speak in the nearly empty chamber and demanded an explanation for Begich’s objection, Begich backed down and Cornyn proceeded.

McCain, however, had missed that exchange.

“I just haven’t seen it before myself, and I don’t like it and I think it’s — it harms the comity of the Senate not to allow one of our members at least a minute,” McCain said.

Lieberman laughed off the incident as much ado about nothing when he returned to the chamber a couple of hours later. He said that Franken apparently was following procedures for sticking to time limits that had been handed down by Senate leaders. Franken had made a good-natured gesture with his hands, Lieberman said, “as if to say ‘There’s nothing I can do’.”

Lieberman said he appreciated his good friend McCain coming to his defense.

“No hard feelings,” he said.

So the only real drama is that John McCain yet again had no idea what was going on before he heard a few context-less words across the room that upset him, and within seconds he was Judging. On the other hand, Five And A Half Years Alan, so Al Franken should resign.

[YouTube]

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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

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111 comments

  1. snideinplainsight

    There’s NO WAY the actual video is going to make me laugh as hard as Newell’s description.

    That’s just a little sad, actually.

  2. snideinplainsight

    This video would be better though if at the end Franken made Lieberman face the corner a-la Blair Witch Project.

  3. organiccoffee

    “I’ll tell you, I’ve never seen a member denied an extra minute or so…”

    Well, now you can cross it off your bucket list.

  4. Mr Blifil

    John McCain should know that if there’s one thing Al Franken has a lot of experience in, it’s comity.

  5. Gopherit

    “Joe, no one likes you anymore, and we’re fucking tired of hearing from you.” THAT would harm the comity of the Senate. Just like the “GO FUCK YOURSELF” of Cheney’s.

  6. Wugou

    Denying someone additional moments to finish remarks is Senatese for “eat a bowl of dicks.”

    The more you know!

  7. Cicada

    McCain says “I don’t know what’s happening here in this body, but it’s wrong”. Interestingly, this is what I think whenever I see footage of McCain. How is he still walking around?

  8. An Outhouse

    I’ve never seen Lieberman’s grandpa so upset before. Was somebody on his lawn? There was smoke coming out the ears and everything.

  9. Gopherit

    “I don’t know what’s happening here in this body, but I think it’s wrong.” Get used to saying that, old man. You’re body is a walking train wreck.

    Oh, and fuck the republicans, those goddamn obstructionist-asswipes.

  10. An Outhouse

    This is priceless, I can’t stop watching it. McCains panties are so twisted he can barely breathe.
    “Don’t you diss my boyfriend like that”

  11. geminisunmars

    Al was thinking: “If this buzzard gets to drone on any longer I’m going to give this seat back to ole toothy coleman. Oh wait, I can stop it.”

  12. Oldskool

    Oh no he di-int. What a perfect time for Bernie Sanders to pop up red-faced and sneer at Lieberman from six inches away. And then break his nose.

  13. azw88

    Hey, old fuck McCain, how many votes did you miss over the past 10 years while you ran for President TWICE??? But, In Johnny-Mac’s world if he didn’t see it, it didn’t happen since he never developed that whole object permanence thing as a toddler.

  14. Dave J.

    Jim, you left out the part at the end where Carl Levin gently tells Walnuts that the thing that Walnuts says he hasn’t seen in 26 years happened like 5 minutes ago, too.

  15. chascates

    Thank God for Al that Ted Stevens isn’t around anymore. Uncle Ted would have thrown a tantrum that would remind Al of when his boys were toddlers. This may be the straw that turns Joe into an Independent Republican.

  16. Advocatus_Diaboli

    Fuck you WALNUTS! Maybe your should go crash another jet, or denounce America, or just get your irrelevant ass tortured.

    Too soon?

  17. slappypaddy

    would john be happy if al had given joe anything less than five-and-a-half years? and i see that joe is a member of the”i”-party. does that stand for “idiots” or “insufferables” or “insignificants” or it it short for “me-me-me!”, or what?

  18. germansteel

    I’ll only be satisfied if this is just a warm-up for the unanimous vote of the Democratic caucus to remove fuckface from his cherished chairmanship of the “Home Land” Security Committee.

  19. Georgia Burning

    Al has professional experience in how the MC is supposed to handle things when a bad open-mic-night guy ignores the red light.

  20. assistant/atlas

    Oh, Al. You enjoyed that, didn’t you, you cheeky monkey? And you know what, America enjoyed that.

  21. Nigerian Business Executive

    Lieberman: Ahaha … ok. I won’t take it personally.

    Take it personally, dipstick. Everybody hates you except for that old geezer from the desert. CRY, BITCH!

  22. ShiningMathPath

    “Oh, reaaalllly?”

    Great Restoration comedy, just great. I want to see the full version, in costume.

  23. RubberSoul

    That’s good to hear from John McCain. I anxiously await his lone Republican vote to break the filibuster.

  24. norbizness

    Joe will bide his time and later filibuster a bill providing low-cost delicious dog food for orphaned puppies.

  25. GeneralLerong

    Yeah, wasn’t that “Oh REAALLLLLY?” moment great? And the fake smile, so quickly replaced with pique.

    Have the newest Dem senators formed a band of brothers to shoot peas at Lieberman? The precedent-setting one was Begich from Alaska…OK, so he missed, but it was apparently a ground-breaking maneuver. Snicker.

  26. Come here a minute

    Ha — WALNUTS just assumed it was just out of spite because Lieberman is an asshole, and Al Franken is a dirty fucking hippie. Well Lieberman is an asshole, but that had nothing to do with it.

  27. I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO

    I have been thinking for days now, yes, I want to get rid of Harry Reid as the Senate Majority Leader, been wanting to do that for days. But who to replace him with? I mean, it’s like a hydra of spinelessness, you remove Reid, who do you replace him with?

    And then it became so clear: Al Franken. Make Al Franken the Maj Leader. He’ll humiliate the piss out of anyone who breaks ranks, and if that don’t work, he’ll wrestle em. no, seriously, he’ll challenge them to a wrestling match, ask Rich “Starburst” Lowry.

  28. whiskey tango foxtrot

    I hope this happened early enough in the day for Daily Show producers to get their hands on it. This is too good.

  29. Escape Goat Nation

    OMGWTFLOL
    Lieberman’s all blah blah blah drone drone drone and then Franken goes, STFU already.
    So Lieberman says, yo, I need to blah blah blah some more and Franken says, no really, STFU, your voice is like an Ipecac Ambien cocktail. Then McCain wakes up and says WTF, why did Lieberman stop? I was having an awesome dream. Then Levin says, go back to sleep oldest Man in the World and McCain says, LOL OK, will do.

  30. Dave J.

    [re=481112]I_KILL_ZOMBIES_ALSO[/re]: Remove Franken and it will go to another senior Dem currently in the Senate leadership. So, basically, Durbin or Schumer.

  31. Cicada

    [re=481125]Dave J.[/re]: If Schumer got it I would wait in breathless anticipation for him to call Lieberman a bitch. I mean, we know he has it in him. Just let it out Chucky!

  32. user-of-owls

    [re=481038]organiccoffee[/re]: I think you’re new to these parts, so let me say huzzah! on your witty introduction. (ok, so if I’ve missed you in the near past, apologies…still, funny!)

  33. ShiningMathPath

    [re=481125]Dave J.[/re]: Don’t know about Schumer – dealing with Cardinal Lieberman is a big step up from insulting flight attendants

  34. hillarys_left_nut

    what WILL be cool is when the Grim fuckin’ Reaper denies Lieberman that “additional moment” and Joe lays that “Reeeeally?” on the Reaper’s bad ass.

    Finds out what that scythe is for, and shit. Reaper don’t play.

  35. Oldskool

    [re=481117]whiskey tango foxtrot[/re]: Last night they said goodbye till 2010. Hows come Wonketiers don’t get massive vacation time?

  36. BlueStateLibtard

    [re=481121]Escape Goat Nation[/re]: Well done! What was Senator Droopy droning on about anyway? It always seems to be … savings in Medicare… lower costs …. all slowly delivered in an irritating nasal drone that makes me want to poke my eyes out.

  37. ShiningMathPath

    [re=481131]hillarys_left_nut[/re]: You’re right, it was just the one word “rrrreeaally”, followed by an “oh, ok …”. Lot’s of action in that one word, though, with a delay on the “rrrr”, a la Finnish elocution meets a Connecticut bitch slap.

  38. user-of-owls

    [re=481136]ella[/re]: Au contraire. He has lots of feelings, all of them hurt. Which is why he acts out like a venal petulant schoolgirl. With the capacity to fuck up the country for a generation or more. Feelings.

    Isn’t there a Vonnegut story where a guy who is angry at his neighbor’s dog cuts up a watch spring into razor sharp shards of metal, mixes it in with a plate of raw meat and slides it over to the dog, who after devouring the meat is slowly shredded from the inside?

    Anybody in DC or CT got a spare watch and a plate of latkes?

  39. Berkeley Bear

    [re=481138]user-of-owls[/re]: You know if the shoe was on the other foot a Cheney or even Walnuts himself would have put bamboo slivers under Lieberman’s fingers, toes and in every other major oriface until he fell in line. Why no one in the Dem Caucus has yet become the intimidator 2 years into one party control of Congress is beyond me. Although Nancy is apparently a big meany according to GOPers in Copenhagen, not setting up press conferences for them and such.

  40. AxmxZ

    You just know that deep inside, Joey took a dirty little notebook out of its stinky little hidey-hole and penciled in “Franken” in shaky letters into the rubric “People to arrange to have beat up later”.

  41. depraved indifference engine

    [re=481138]user-of-owls[/re]: Isn’t there a Vonnegut story where a guy

    It was Paul Lazzaro, in Slaughterhouse Five — the guy who bragged about his knife, which featured a groove that ensured that the stab wound would not close, that blood would continue to flow upon stabbing. And that dog never bothered him again.

    But you’d better hurry. Hannukah ends tomorrow night.

  42. The Unfairman

    So many people mocked me for voting for Franken, even my fellow Wonketeers, and our Dear Leader Editors gave him “no respect”.

    But I say it’s the best vote I’ve cast – probably ever. Even better than the one I cast for Barry.

  43. Larry McAwful

    I didn’t think it was possible, but I now have a new favorite senator from Minnesota. I mean, Amy Klobuchar is still way up there in my book; she still makes my heart race a little faster every time I see her. But Al Franken now makes my heart run just ever such a little bit more than Amy can.

    You’re still tops in my book, Amy, but it’s nothing personal: Al just one-upped you. I still love you both ever so much, all the same, also.

  44. petehammer

    The way Joe Lie says “Really?” is exactly the way any super-privileged kid who doesn’t get what is ENTITLED to says the word. I’ve seen this behavior before, tons of times, and it just demonstrates an awful level of ENTITLEMENT.

    “So, it looks like you didn’t get that job/car/house/date.”

    “Realllllllly.”

  45. JooJoo Bee

    I’d love to hear Leiberman say “Really?” like that when told he can’t see the doctor because he doesn’t have insurance, and to maybe try to downtown ER. Of course, I guess that would never actually happen, what with the Federal employees’ group plan, the Connecticut insurance company PAC, the Medicare and the walletful of million-dollar bills ‘n’ all. So we;’ll just have to make do with this for now. Pity.

  46. El Pinche

    Just like a whiny libtard, I’m thinking that wasn’t enough. Franken should have taken the Senate Gavel to Lieberman’s wee loins. “Whos funny now??!! “

  47. Bearbloke

    [re=481060]Dave J.[/re]: So Ol’Man McFAIL is too bloody senile to remember such an unprecedented OUTRAGE that occurred FIVE AND A HALF HOURS earlier?

    [re=481065]Advocatus_Diaboli[/re]: Never too soon, mate – never too soon…

  48. S.Luggo

    [re=481043]Cicada[/re]:
    Don’t be bustin’ on John McNuggets, dude. He gotz confused by the change in Time Zones between his office couch in the Russell Office Building and his desk at the Senate. Happens.

  49. Barcode of the Apocalypse

    You kind of expect McCain to snap his head up suddenly and shout, “You kids get offa my lawn!”

  50. shortsshortsshorts

    Can one Senator object to another Senator being a Senator in the first place? We should explore this possibility.

  51. Jukesgrrl

    [re=481176]Bearbloke[/re]: Grampa Crash Helmet doesn’t know what happened five-and-a-half MINUTES ago. He’s got the Reaganitis. But he’s also got real gangsters in his wife’s family, so if Droopy Dog can’t scare up any muscle in Bridgeport, Cindy could provide some Phoenix-style revenge on Sen. Franken.

    So, Al, whatever you do, don’t get in bed without checking first for a bloody Santa Claus head.

  52. SayItWithWookies

    [re=481198]Nigerian Business Executive[/re]: Alright — Steeled and Blingeed. We better take advantage of this, ’cause it won’t be up for much longer.

  53. DoktorZoom

    [re=481201]DoktorZoom[/re]: well THAT was quick… And I swear, there was no nudity, which in retrospect seems rather wimpy of me.

  54. S.Luggo

    [re=481198]Nigerian Business Executive[/re]: Why do you mock the Jesus spirit of Christmas, I mean like, shazizel?

  55. SayItWithWookies

    [re=481214]imissopus[/re]: Apparently you are — or else, like DoktorZoom, you posted a blank photo titled Access Denied.

  56. ArthurTwoSheds

    Shit. I was all ready to make a “I think it adds to the comedy” quip but it’s already been referenced to death. Bastards!

  57. LowerdPeninsula

    This is so fucking sad. John McCain comes in yet again to defend the honor of his boyfriend. Get a fuckin room, you too. Hell, invite Lindsey and you all can have a threesome…as you three are wont to do, of course.

  58. PinkyTuscadero

    [re=481121]Escape Goat Nation[/re]: Maybe I’m just feeling emotional from all the cookie baking, ornament hanging, drinking first thing in the morning, and watching our nation get ripped asunder by a couple insurance companies, but I needed to thank you for this one.

  59. Curved

    [re=481056]SayItWithWookies[/re]: “That was like a little bootheel of sunshine on the cockroach of my day.” Quote of the friggen Day. Now get of my lawn, or I’m tell Joe McCain’s grampa!

  60. Gumboz1953

    [re=481241]ArthurTwoSheds[/re]: I bet it was all Franken could do not to guffaw and pee his pants when he heard that. Or maybe he did.

  61. Ducksworthy

    I agree with Senator McCain. Not letting these horrible insurance company shills drone on in their whiny weaselly voices hurts the comedy.

  62. avoidinggradingpapers

    One of my two right-wingy Facebook pals just posted that he’d love to see a Franken/Grayson ticket in 2012, acting like that would be so hilarious cuz wouldn’t they be barbarian buffoons together. (Kinda like when we all fantasize about a Palin/Bachmann ticket for laughs.) That immediately struck me as a fine, fine idea–but not for the reasons my teabaggy friend thinks. Franken and Grayson would be fucking awesome! They’re smart and snarky and gutsy and funny and impassioned about all the causes I care about. Bring it! I’m more and more pleased with my Franken vote each time he makes the news.

  63. Ripley_v_alien

    “no hard feelings” sayeth the man who helps keep Viagra covered by insurance….there’s a reason for that..no HARD feelings, huh Joe?

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