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Easy! Tiger Woods is ~45% black, while Barack Obama is 50% black. More of this talk, please!

There’s one thing in the news, and then there’s this other thing:

Yet for all the agony that Woods’ actions have caused his God, wife, children, endorsement clients, and fans his actions pale in comparison to the merciless march the current administration is on to empower themselves, seek to increase the divide between the powerful and the needy, and in the end ruin the lives of families in America today.

Ha ha ha, “his God.” Does he know that Tiger Woods is a Buddhist? “Their” God is Barack Obama. Seriously! Says so right there in the Bible.

Why Obama is worse than Tiger [Townhall]

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  • Lascauxcaveman

    A worse putter or worse driver?

  • Sharkey

    Ummm, golf handicap?

  • Gopherit

    Well, Tiger is a naturalized citizen for one.

    And he isn’t an inadequate black male.

  • Vulpes82

    There’s a columnist named Mary Katherine Ham? Really? REALLY?

  • nbawriter

    Dear Tiger,

    Please unload some of your love Siemens in this idiot’s eye.

    Thanks,

    Me

  • chascates

    And Obama plays more golf than Bush did which is suspicious right there.

  • ManchuCandidate

    At least it’s not Hitler. Yet.

  • Extemporanus

    Eenym, meeny, miny, mo
    Catch a…

  • cockfightbarmitzvah

    Just wait til he reads my article “Why Kevin McCullough is worse than ________ (insert pasty-faced, troglodyte conservative columnist of your choosing here)”

  • Scarab

    Why would he choose to compare Tiger to Obama?
    What trait do they share that this non-racist gentleman find note-worthy?

  • snideinplainsight

    ” […] merciless march the current administration is on to […] seek to increase the divide between the powerful and the needy […]”

    Has this guy even seen a Laffer curve?

  • Texan Bulldoggette

    I think Kevin McCullough is just jealous. He sure is fugly & Lord knows he won’t get the tail in his lifetime that Tiger & Barry get in one week (esp. Tiger). But I like how he equates ‘ruining the lives of families’ to getting a little action on the side.

  • loquaciousmusic

    If Town Hall columnist Mary Katherine Ham married Town Hall columnist Mike Gallagher, her name would become “Mary Katherine Gallagher.” Just sayin’.

  • gurukalehuru

    [re=477605]Gopherit[/re]: No. Tiger’s dad is American. He is therefore American. (Same as my kids, who’ve never been to the US except on vacation and aren’t too keen on speaking English, but they both have American passports.)

  • twoeightnine
  • JMP

    So first this idiot, like many, focuses on the harm Tiger caused to his family by cheating, but completely ignores the greater wrongdoing of his wife’s beating him. Of course. But then, he laughably attacks Obama as trying to hurt families and workers for his policies designed explicitly to help families and workers.

    “Every day that President Obama contemplates the idea of spending trillions more of yours and my tax dollars, the less the chances of his being able to reduce the non-voluntary unemployment/under-employment rates that are now drastically impacting one out of every five families in America”

    Dipshit, that money is being spent to reduce unemployment; learn some history, your support of balanced budgets was tried by Herbert Hoover during the depression and didn’t work; FDR spent money to employ Americans and ended the fucking Depression. Government spending = jobs, that’s basic economics.

    “seek to increase the divide between the powerful and the needy”

    No, moron, that’s what Republican policies seek to do; what do you think healthcare reform is all about.

    But then, this guy also tries to deny the proven reality of global warming. What do you expect but dangerous stupidity from a flat-earther?

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    He’s talking about bowling, right?

  • SayItWithWookies

    Wow — and I thought marrying a white woman was the worst thing a non-white male could do. I guess the people who made that rule probably never even considered the “getting elected president” possibility.

  • gurukalehuru

    oh, oh, oh, the agony Tiger has caused his fans.
    I didn’t get upset about Michael Jackson buttfucking little boys, I’m not going to get upset about a good looking, multi-millionaire young athlete getting about the amount of nookie I suspect a lot of good looking, multi-millionaire young athletes get.

  • populucious

    [re=477615]Scarab[/re]: Um…they’re both married to hot Scandinavian chicks?

  • Servo

    I’m sure McCullough will be overjoyed by this administration’s actions when he gets his pink slip.

  • Suds McKenzie

    I’m sure, somewhere in Africa, Siemens has already answered this question.

  • stew

    Plus, Tiger at least goes for the white chicks which shows…whatever.

  • Come here a minute

    How does The Rock fit into this scale of bad, worse, and worst mixed race Americans?

  • bureaucrap

    stay tuned for the next column: “Why Obama is worse than Idi Amin” (7th in the series “Totally non-racist reasons to hate our uppity (possibly Kenyan Muslim) President who Doesn’t know his Place (and just might be a traitor to Real Americans)”).

  • Manos: Hands of Fate

    Is Tiger’s god really agonizing over his screwing around? If he is, he needs some more responsiblities, pronto.

  • Hooray For Anything

    [re=477622]loquaciousmusic[/re]: She could also start up her own brand of pork byproducts and call it “Mary Katherine Ham’s Ham.”

  • CrunchyKnee

    I for one have never seen Tiger’s birth certificate.

  • JMP

    [re=477648]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: Every time someone has non- or extra-marital sex, the Baby Jesus cries. Same with sex in a position other than missionary, or with birth control, because every bit of Siemens is sacred.

    Wait, what’s that you say? Buddhism? Sounds furrin and un-Merkin.

  • zenferret

    [re=477615]Scarab[/re]: They are both more handsome than the author?

  • freakishlystrong

    Man, who didn’t see this coming? Mixed raced, talented, dark skinned guys playing at a white guys game, and succeeding? I can’t figure out which of them is more egregious.

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    Remind me never to visit the TownHall site ever again. The rampant stupidity was enough to make my brain bleed, but the Sarah Palin “Going Rogue” popup nearly made me shit my pants.

  • user-of-owls

    [re=477642]Come here a minute[/re]: It’s tricky, but most experts put him at somewhat better than W.E.B. Dubois and a little bit worse than Rae Dawn Chong.

  • binarian

    Damn, those Townhallers are retarded. One of ’em says Texas is going to secede soon and will be it’s own country and the last basion of freedom.

  • user-of-owls

    [re=477649]Hooray For Anything[/re]: I would not eat that in a boat. I would not eat that with a goat.

  • Redhead

    [re=477653]zenferret[/re]: If the stereotypes are true, they both have a certain body part much bigger than that of the author?

    (I meant their brains, you dirty minds!)

  • JSDC007

    Next on Townhall.

    Why Obama is worse than Whitney Houston.

    Why Obama is worse than Michael Vicks.

    Why Obama is worse than Lindsay Lohan (yes, an actual white person).

  • kapish

    You mean they are two different people!

  • chaste everywhere

    I thought Tiger and Obama were the same guy until all this stuff started coming out about the shiksas, or whatever mixed-race Buddho-commie pussyhounds call their countless white chicks.

  • Larry McAwful

    In 2010, we’re going to see interesting concentrations of energy. Dolts like these ClownHall megadolts are going to agitate, scaring off the moderate Republicans. Meanwhile, no one is going to be at all motivated to vote Democratic. This means the midterms are up for grabs, and if voter turnout cracks 10%, it’ll be something of a miracle.

  • WadISay

    There must be a conservative essay contest, like the Bulwer-Lytton contest, where you find some universally reviled thing (Mao, Papa Doc Duvalier, the latest “Batman” villan, genital herpes) and compare it to Obama, whom you should hate even more. The balloon boy is next.

  • blogslut

    Hey, Kevin:

    If you meet yourself on the road, Zen Master Linji has some advice for you.

  • lawrenceofthedesert

    Obama is worse than Tiger because he’s harder to spell.

  • kentuckienne2

    …the merciless march the current administration is on to empower themselves, seek to increase the divide between the powerful and the needy, and in the end ruin the lives of families in America today.

    This was supposed to have been published during the Bush administration, correct?

  • SlouchingTowardsWasilla

    I sleep better knowing that Mr. McCullough’s God will never have to agonize over his adulterous affairs.

  • Native of SL UT

    “…seek to increase the divide between the powerful and the needy”
    Wait, I thought Barry was all about that redistributing the wealth shit. I thought he was a socialist. Now it turns out he’s just another greedy Republican? God, this stuff is hard to keep up with.

  • Johnny Zhivago

    [re=477663]JSDC007[/re]: Face it, Obama is just the worst person ever!

  • Johnny Zhivago

    What’s with the fancy European garden pinwheels all over this page?

  • Potater

    [re=477749]Native of SL UT[/re]: Republicans want Obama to do something to help, until Obama tries to do something to help. Thereafter he’s illegally usurping power and is an arrogant socialist fascist.

    It’s simply once you get the “logic” behind it.

  • Potater

    [re=477766]Potater[/re]: It’s also simple, too.

  • problemwithcaring

    I wish Townhall would save us all some time and just rank every Black person in America from worst to best.

  • AutomaticPilot

    [re=477607]Vulpes82[/re]: And Hugh Hewitt?? I call bullshit. Where is Ben Dover?

  • WarAndG

    Well Mr. McCullough of all of the tiring commentary coming from middle-aged pop-eyed bald white conservatives right this minute, yours is fucktardily awesome.

  • FlownOver

    Easy now – I’ll have you know this man majored in Comparative Negrology at Regent University.

  • Lionel Hutz Esq.

    Yet for all the agony that Woods’ actions have caused his God. . . .

    What agony. Everyone knows the Buddha was down with the ladies. We are not talking Jesus, who lived with his Mom until he was in his thirties.

  • miquonranger03

    Wait, wait, wait…I want to hear what the above-mentioned Miss Ham has to say. Aptly named? We shall see. (it is likely)

  • Long Form Def Certificate

    Kevin Mc Cullough… has left the yard.

  • LowerdPeninsula

    [re=477623]gurukalehuru[/re]: Wait, what? Where are you from?

  • Captain Swing

    “…to empower themselves, seek to increase the divide between the powerful and the needy, and in the end ruin the lives of families in America today.”

    Er, Kevin, you kreep… That was the previous guy- You know, the one who stood by and watched the U.S. Economy go down the shitter; sent courageous young soldiers to risk their lives based on a lie; showered the wealthy with tax cuts and utterly screwed everybody else. George W. Bush was his name. Surely you remember ol’ Dubya; he always wore that How-the-fuck-did-I-ever-get-this-job grin. He got it because dumb-as-dog-shit-douchebags like YOU voted for him.

    The guy who inherited this mess of Biblical proportions has been doing his best to clean it up- and he’s not getting much help from those most responsible for creating it.

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