The Senate went to work on a Sunday — Hanukkah Sunday, we bet! — and desecrated the grave of the Stillborn Jesus to give hundreds of billions of dollars to themselves and their favorite government programs. The bill okays $447 billion for whatever federal agencies plus $650 billion to keep funding teabagger welfare programs such as Medicare, which pointlessly extends the miserable lives of old white people with no money. (The House approved this same trainload of money last week.)
Now Congress just needs to “solve health care” and approve another $600 billion for whatever the Pentagon does with $600 billion (victory?) and then just a few more “remaining items” need to be figured out, and everybody in Washington can go home to bang constituent hookers and glug whiskey-ambien cocktails until it’s time to come back next year and impeach Obama.
The remaining items include an increase in the national debt limit, a jobs measure being drafted by House Democratic leaders, an extension of unemployment and health benefits for out-of-work Americans, the renewal of a handful of other expiring programs and an extension of the federal estate tax.
Easy! Mitch McConnell, however, said he was anxious to get back to Kentucky and start sucking holiday restroom dick now, so he has complained about everything. [NYT/Marketwatch]
{ 52 comments }
Just keep fucking that chicken, Congress…
This so-called “jobs measure” better not have any plans on putting my ass back to work…
Tis the season to overextend.
“Deficits don’t matter.”
-Dick Cheney
Any money for starving foxes in that budget? Even poetry-quoting, faggoty LYBURAL foxes gotta eat, and dem Rack-coons are about as “sharing” as the rest of those rural TRU AMARECANS!
So is this good thing or a bad thing? I don’t know what to think until somebody tells me. Is Beck on?
[re=477250]hockeymom[/re]: Of course it’s bad. It’s so bad, I’m going to cry. I just love my country sooooo much…
[re=477247]Neilist[/re]: now, now Neilist, don’t you know that every private fox hunting club in the country has a policy of a ‘chicken in every pot’ for the local foxes?
[re=477251]bondwooley[/re]: Yes, it’s satire every time you blogwhore it.
[re=477246]rocktonsammy[/re]: The full Cheney quote was, “Deficits don’t matter, Ronald Reagan proved that.” I would say that it should be printed on a cinderblock and shoved up the ass of the Repub Congressional leadership, except that they would probably enjoy the experience.
[re=477256]WadISay[/re]: Lieberman’s ass, too. Just because.
Since this all involves a bunch of whores and more than a couple of “Johns”, let’s hope it leads to a “happy ending”.
McConnell wasn’t concerned about deficits while Bush was around.
Wait, the Senate actually passed something? It’s a Festivus Miracle!
[re=477256]WadISay[/re]:
Exactly,thank you.
[re=477253]sati demise[/re]: Homos hunt foxes. Particularly English Homos, on Horseback. (Wait a minute: “English Homos” is redundant.)
Real Men hunt lions. On foot. With a spear. Like Hopey did from his Kenyan cradle.
Wait. I thought Congress was going to concentrate on fixing that college bowl playoff problem. This shit here’s like public policy or something.
[re=477251]bondwooley[/re]: Too bad you’re not funny, or even mildly interesting. I’d rather watch foxes try to steal cat food.
And the saddest thing of all, after the gratituous defsit spendin, Mitch McConnell still can’t buy that new chin he’s always wanted. Let us all pray to Jesus Santa.
They only did it on a Sunday to try and trick Lieberman into staying
home for the holidays.
[re=477267]El Pinche[/re]: Maybe McConnell can ask $arah Palin whom to go to for cheap implants. It’ll look like ass done wrong, but it’ll be a new chin.
[re=477267]El Pinche[/re]: McConnell should ask for surgery advice from Tara Reid. He already has? Oops, my bad.
Why stop with a new chin? A lobomony would be good too since he never got all exercised over deficits until the black man started spending some of his money!
[re=477270]foulmouthed mrscreant[/re]: [re=477274]DoctorCulturae[/re]: McConnell should go all the way and get a whole head implant. Anything is better than that mound of afterbirth on his neck. And a functioning brain is optional.
[re=477254]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: [re=477266]geminisunmars[/re]:
Sincere apologies for wasting your time. No offense was intended.
[re=477275]Custersdeadhorse[/re]: I believe that was the last procedure he had done, just after he was elected.
I hope they put something in there for bankers and Wall Streeters. Where would we be without them.
Oh, right.
[re=477263]Neilist[/re]: Guess that makes me a homo – though at least not an English one. What’s your excuse?
[re=477253]sati demise[/re]: We just call them hunts e.g. Abington Hills Hunt
[re=477281]x111e7thst[/re]: My excuse? How about a Wilde One?:
Fox hunting: “The unspeakable in pursuit of the inedible.”
Which, come to think of it, was a pretty good description of Oscar’s Love Life with Alfred, Lord Douglas.
But in the Interest of English Homo Good Taste And Decorum, we won’t go there.
After all, it might involve quoting poetry — including that Piece of Trash Oscar wrote about his time in the Barbed Wire Hotel.
“Ballad of Reading Gaol.” Bloody ponce couldn’t even spell “hoosegow” properly/
:::Sniff:::
[re=477253]sati demise[/re]: or would that be a “kitty in every pot”?
O/T report from Mom’s house in Detroit: I retrieved the Sunday Free Press from the front porch (yes, they still deliver in the ghetto!). It’s the usual 9 pounds of circulars plus 10 pounds of Xmas crap and 4 ounces of “news”, but today’s batch was special because it contained a supplement entitled, “2010 Notice of Foreclosed Property”.
The “newspaper” consisted of 62 pages of what passes for news around here. The supplementary “notice” contained (I shit you not) 128 pages, each page containing 6 columns of 28 or 30 properties (per column!) within Wayne County, about to, or having already been foreclosed upon.
Haha! And they said newspapers were dead! If this keeps up, Detroit’s papers will be in the black again, very soon. Maybe they can just forego news gathering altogether and just deliver foreclosure and death notices and declare victory.
Christ, I gotta’ get back to New York.
Hey, look! Joe Lieberman is a piece of shit! I tried to call his office tonight and leave a message, but his voicemail box is full. I WONDER WHY.
I for one promise never to say anything mean about anyone in Congress ever again if they extend my unemployment benefits to the date my Social Security payments kick in. That’s a jobs program I could believe in.
[re=477286]loquaciousmusic[/re]: No snark. Senator Shitstain, R-CT.
[re=477277]El Pinche[/re]: A functioning brain might be overkill in the Senate.
[re=477251]bondwooley[/re]: Rablerouser42, is that you?
[re=477292]JMP[/re]: No, but you have me curious. Who is Rablerouser42?
OT but hooray for schizopolitics: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/14/world/europe/14italy.html?ref=global-home
[re=477293]bondwooley[/re]: Skoalrebel’s sister.
[re=477296]BeWoot[/re]: Not sure who that is either, but thanks.
Jesus, there’s no hope
[re=477283]Neilist[/re]: Okay, what did you do with Neilist? You are who now?
[re=477293]bondwooley[/re]: A recently-banned blogwhore for an unfunny “satire” website.
[re=477285]bitchincamaro[/re]: Really, I feel your pain, and I know it’s bad in Detroit, but you’ve really got to start visiting more of the city. If your mom lives in one of the urban prairies, mayhaps, it’s time you discussed moving back into civilization of which there are still pieces of in that once-great (and still great) city.
[re=477284]Flanders[/re]: It’s definitely “a kitty in every pot” at my club.
Why don’t the Reps in Congress just ask their favorite faith-healing evangelists to heal everyone? That’s the real Republican health plan, anyway.
Congressmen ONLY see constituant hookers because otherwise they can’t pay for them using their franking priviledge.
This is the comment I left over at Huffpo and I must say, I’m not terribly surprised they didn’t print it: If Joe Lieberman were to suffer an excruciatingly painful heart attack and die, hundreds of millions of people would be better off. He is a worthless human being, a net negative for the human race.
[re=477283]Neilist[/re]:
Some strangle with the hands of Lust,
Some with the hands of Gold:
The kindest use a knife, because
The dead so soon grow cold.
I prefer to harry to death from horseback – behind a pack of hounds.
[re=477244]the problem child[/re]: Chicken louvres.
[re=477289]Jukesgrrl[/re]: Amen sistah!
Think of Joe Lieberman as a special kind of Ashley Dupre who, to steal a line from Liberace of all people, has to do a lot less for his diamonds.
I was shocked to learn from Layne’s post that indoor plumbing had come to Kentucky. I guess the demise of the Sears catalog had made it inevitable.
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