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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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62 comments

  1. comicbookguy

    They need to add I GUESS I AM A RACIST as an option on all their polls.

    So what do 193% of Fox viewers really think?

  2. Joshua Norton

    So does Fox take in all the interns you guys turn down or something? ‘Cause, c’mon, they can’t actually be paying anyone to do this shit.

    Can they?

  3. shadowMark

    [re=475944]comicbookguy[/re]: They should add “Done, but with errors on page” to everything they display.

  4. queeraselvis v 2.0

    Why did I read the comments on the Fuck Snooze site? I feel like I need a nice hot shower and a brain transplant.

  5. madtowngooner

    There has to be a better word than retard to describe these morans. At least it wasn’t a Chyron mistake.

  6. Come here a minute

    I am not sure if I have the moral authority to judge Obama, Schweitzer, King, and Mandela. Fox News, please vote for me.

  7. hoosiermama

    [re=475963]BobTheBuilder[/re]: I, on the other hand, prefer to take the less cynical view that they’re simply morons.

  8. Texan Bulldoggette

    Ha ha ha…those dumb asses still haven’t fixed the wording yet, either. The comments are priceless–what are Wonkette commenters doing on Foxnews.com? (I couldn’t read too many but none of those geniuses showed any confusion about the wording.)

  9. cooter

    [re=475952]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Just 2? I thought I was actually getting to decide whether Obama deserved the Nobel Peace Prize. Turns out it was just a survey.

  10. rikitikitavi

    All this time I just assumed that Fox’s fuckups like this were just plausibly deniable ways of attacking Democrats. But when they actually produce a poll with the question “Does Obama Deserve the Nobel Peace Prize?” and 80% respond yes, well, that’s proof that their fuckups are the result of sheer fucking incompetence.

    But, still, I’m going to go around saying that 80% of Fox News readers believe Obama deserves the Nobel Peace Prize.

  11. Oldskool

    Yes, I will not vote for him because he is the best president ever. No, he cannot lead this country because we’re not worthy of such a great leader.

    I’m starting to get the hang of it. Tomorrow I’m watching Fox.

  12. Escape Goat Nation

    GJguigugu hui etr frtdr? Oggyy fsrt, gyf frhy. Pgfyutg fgyugi Gwegfyhhi;?

    Yes

    Oh yeah Big Time!

    You Betcha!

  13. SmutBoffin

    “OBAMA CAN SPEAK PRETTY WORDS, BUT HE IS A COMMUNIST OUT TO DESTROY AMERICA. I DO NOT TRUST HIM. Vote NO to government run insurance. LIKE HE IS REMAKING AMERICA FOR HIS DICTATORSHIP; I.E.; HEALTH REFORM….WE WILL ALL BE SLAVES AND SURFS IF THIS THINGS GOES THRU … IS THAT “PEACEFUL?”

    Okay, which one of you is this?

    “What a joke. This was done as a political ploy to weaken the US.”

    Huh?

    “The nobel peace prize has been given to liars like Al Gore (Climate-gate) and terrorists like Yassir Arafat (Oslo Accords, which he had no intention of keeping). Why shouldn’t it be given to an incompetent like Obama? The entire Nobel program is a farce. Remember the scientists who claimed they had worked out a cold fusion process? Later it was exposed as a fraud. The literature prizes are given to writers whose work no one reads. I’ll bet Chavez or Ahmadinejad gets one next.”

    Yeah, those guys won a Nobel for cold fusion. I remember that. And what writers would you recommend, you illiterate dumbass?

    “WHAT A FARCE! WE NEED A “NOBULL PEACE PRIZE” FREE FROM POLITICAL CORRECTNESS AND PARTISAN POLITICS, BUT THAT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. THE LEFT HAS CONTROL OF THE MEDIA, ACADEMIA, CONGRESS, NEA, AARP, AND CERTAIN CHURCH DENOMINATIONS AND WE HAVE OURSELVES TO THANK FOR THIS.”

    Ugh.

  14. bluemoose

    If you read the sentence, it says that Obama said his accomplishments are slight compared to others, and then asks if we agree with that assessment. So if you read that it makes sense, but the fact that they posed the question again means it makes no sense… Banana.

  15. Paul Tardy

    Did POTUS Obama make this statement: “For make no mistake: Evil does exist in the world. A non-violent movement could not have halted Hitler’s armies.”

    Yes, it was just like POTUS George W Bush said it.

    No, it was POTUS Barrack H Obama.

    Not sure, but it was Barrack H Obama.

  16. Escape Goat Nation

    Yes. Obama deserves it because he hates our troops.

    No. Obama does not deserve it because he hates America.

    Not Sure. I don’t know if he deserves it but he’s a Nazi.

    Tonight on The Factor: Bill O’Reilly breaks down the results of our poll that show 120% of Americans believe That Obama is a Nazi that hate’s our troops and America.

  17. The Little Rock

    Does this mean that the average Faux News poll taker is literate?

    1. Yes, compared to regulars on cnn.com these people can’t read at a third grade level.

    2. No, after reading and re-reading this question they believe Faux News is the only media outlet with the literary capability to craft a question tricky enough to make liberals answer “no.”

    3. Palin/Cheney 2012 (gag)

  18. Flanders

    [re=475997]SmutBoffin[/re]: Well, Shorts is up and moving around, so my guess is that he’s the one that’s been facilitating the converation over there….

  19. DC Hates Me

    Compared to Mother Jesus Martin Luther God, he is unworthy of the award. But compared to Yassir Arafat, Menachem Begin or Alfred Nobel, sure, he can haz peace prize.

  20. AxmxZ

    Is FOX a genuine news service?

    A. Yes, it’s a ridiculously inept propaganda machine!
    B. No, it’s not a genuine news service by any stretch of the imagination.
    C. I’m too drunk/inbred to answer.

  21. Advocatus_Diaboli

    jeffsusan from South Carolina comments: The only thing he has done is put this country deeper into dept!

    I couldn’t possibly snark on that to make it funnier.

  22. depraved indifference engine

    Damn, they fixed it. But they won’t let me comment, because apparently “87801″ is not a valid zip code. The error message says that a valid US zip code must have *five* digits, not 193.

  23. FarkTard

    They fixed it but they did not reset the results. If you’re looking for atrocities, switching the questions without resetting the results is greater.

  24. gradgrind

    Oblivious to any distinction between the Nobel comittee and the local Rotary, a leading Foxface commenter wonders, “Is this the first time the Peace Prize ever been awarded to a marxist?” Let me answer that question with another question:

    Is this the first time a Foxhole has asked an easy-to-research question he’s too lazy to answer for himself?

    Highlights here:

    2008 – Martti Ahtisaari, Social Democrat former president of Finland.
    2007 – Al Gore. Not a marxist, but no Fox commenter would take my word for it.
    1990 – Mikhail Gorbachev, duh!
    1987 – Oscar Arias Sánchez, social democrat.
    1983 – Lech Walesa – commie! trade unionist! And possibly (this is a matter of controversy) an informant for Poland’s communits government back in the day. Workaday marxism is for pussies.
    1982 – Alva Myrdal, Swedish Social Democrat
    1973 – Le Duc Tho, commie who had to share his prize w/ that peacenik Kissinger.
    1931 – The oddest couple of winners, hands down. Jane Addams campaigned for the Progressive Party, had girlfriends, lived in Chicago: a hell-bound trifecta. She had to go halvesies on the prize with Nicholas Murray Butler, who ran an Ivy League college while pursuing his true calling as a vicious white-power Christianist. Focks and Freinds can debate this one ’til they reach 120% agreement.
    1927 – Ferdinand Buisson, “academic, educational bureaucrat, Protestant pastor, pacifist and Socialist politician,” per Wikipedia. What part of that would Jeezis hate most?
    1926 – Aristide Briand, leader of the French Socialists, founder of trade unions.
    1925 – Sir Austen Chamberlain, “junior Whip of the Liberal Unionists” — Wonketteers will be relieved but unsurprised to learn that this British S&M cabal was a Conservative party enclave.
    1922 – Fridtjof Nansen – finally, a monarchist! In heaven as I write, probably making jokes about Kenyans.
    1921 – Hjalmar Branting, Swedish Social Democrat.
    1913 – Henri La Fontaine, Socialist member of the Senate. Of Belgium, but it still counts.

  25. LowerdPeninsula

    “Even more “win” for Fox News, which is so incompetent with polls at this point that it cannot get its own yes-or-no questions correct.”

    Oh, you don’t think they got it correct? I think they knew exactly what they were doing…

  26. MissTheHill

    “WE WILL ALL BE SLAVES AND SURFS”? Dude, sounds gnarly. I didn’t know that wave-riding was part of health care reform.

    While we all have to laugh at the excrement coming out of Faux, the sobering, terrifying, and bat shit crazy fact is that so many Muhrikans–sadly, my relatives included–have their sole source of national and international news and information from this rat hole of a television network and take what it says as gospel!

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