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Thinkers Declare All Good Things To Be Unconstitutional

Your head could be in this!Monday, December 7: A never before seen event: a Democrat will say mean things about Republicans, today, in real life. House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer will explain why he thinks Conservatives are to blame for every single problem in America. [Center for American Progress Action Fund]

  • Tuesday, December 8: Perhaps too excited for the future, The Brookings Institution looks at teleportation and hovercrafts as possible forms of alternative transportation. [Brookings Institution]
  • Wednesday, December 9: The US Institute of Peace asks thousands of questions about how to engage with Somalia, as it seems that no one has ever asked any questions about the lost country except for, “Why do you keep stealing people?” [US Institute of Peace]
  • Wednesday, December 9: Congress can’t make everyone buy a Buick, so naturally requiring everyone to have health insurance is wrong, evil, terrible, and unconstitutional. Such is health care reform according to the Heritage Foundation. [Heritage Foundation]
  • Wednesday, December 9: The CATO Institute tells Latin America to be more American than Latin if it ever wants to be a viable part of the West. [Cato Institute]

About the author

Arielle Fleisher is the Wonkabout. She roams D.C. seeking tasty foods, cheap drinks, whole-pig BBQs, think tank events, street fairs and other local horrors.

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