This morning’s theatrical populist pretend-fest is already underway in the Senate, where Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke is facing his first reconfirmation hearing before very very angry Republicans and Democrats, who have all sorts of “ideas” for the Fed in the future.
(1) The Fed is too close to the big banks and gives them insane amounts of money with no strings of any value attached. In this sense it is much like the United States Congress. It would be nice if the Congress could write some law demanding that banks of a certain size and vulgar profitability in this shitty economy donate $X(XXXXXX) billion to businesses that might want to hire humans, to work. Why Bernie Sanders needs Ben Bernanke to write and pass this law through Congress himself is unclear, but Bernie Sanders is pretty cool so go Bernie.
(2) My god Congress should either *abolish* the Fed completely like Ron Paul wants, or leave it basically the way it is, because if this Congress thinks it needs to give itself more “oversight” over monetary policy, over the money supply, over things that actually require thought and advanced knowledge and oftentimes quick responses, we’re getting on the first night boat to Bermuda to live and smoke drugs with the Uighurs forever. (Wait… why don’t we do that right now, anyway?)
(3) Screw all of these people, the ones who handle the money.
(4) Yeah we’re sure the problem will be solved forever if they don’t confirm the Great Satan Ben Bernanke. We’re sure they’ll replace him with Noam Chomsky or the Wobblies and the banks will never have power again.
(5) It would be really nice if folks had jobs and some money again. It’s awful. Americans are good people, and maybe when we all have jobs and some money again we’ll stop being so mean to each other.
Bernanke Defends the Fed in Confirmation Hearing [NYT]
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Mr. Bernanke, according to this Wikipedia page I found via a redstate commenter, I should be OUTRAGED that your Fed has allowed TARP to exist. How do you explain the outrage on the internet over the fact that you are complicit in creating the Amero, Bowing down to the New World Order, and Hiding the fact that President Obama is a Kenyan-Born Muslin? I also have a video proving that Tu-Pac is alive, what are your thoughts on this?
“Americans are good people”?
What America do you live in, exactly?
From The Hill: “During an interview with CNBC this morning, Bunning — who also voted against Bernanke’s appointment in 2006 — said the sitting Fed chairman has so far earned himself a dismal grade of ‘F-.’”
Being “failed” by Jim Bunning is like…
Could anybody here maybe lend me a fiddy?
“Certainly, we are still deep in the woods. The question is whether Chairman Bernanke is the person best-suited to lead us out and keep us out” — Senator Richard C. Shelby
Replace Bernanke with Elin Nordegren.
If nothing else, I appreciated the Wobblies reference.
[re=470779]shadowMark[/re]: Elin Nordegren was not deep in the woods. It was the other way around. She pooped a baby to prove it.
(5) If Real American Jeebus wanted people to have jobs or money he would provide these things. Clearly the indigent and unemployed are both mentally deficient and morally defective.
Re: (5)
No kidding.
I just read that charities connected to the Salvation Army in Houston are checking immigration status before they hand out presents to poor kids.
This sucks on so many fronts.
1. That we have so many needy kids, there aren’t enough toys to go around.
2. The ugly message that some kids are more deserving than others (only good, little LEGAL kids deserve toys).
3. The hypocrisy of the Salvation Army, which is so closely associated with Christianity. Because checking immigration status is EXACTLY what Jesus would do.
I’m hoping for a Network-style meltdown.
“You wanna know why we’re in this shit? Because your fucking constituents – that’s right, the ones who slather you up with money every cycle like a goddamn prize pig – who think that every debt’s a fucking asset, regardless of how fucking ridiculous the ratio is between it and the property securing it! Here’s a good law for you – try limiting leverage to, I don’t know, a mere 20 or 25 fucking times the worth of the collateral so that the dipshit MBAs you’ve permitted to run the goddamn financial universe don’t steer us all off a cliff, while collecting real goddamn bonuses for imaginary motherfucking profits! Try STEPPING THE FUCK OFF and ENCOURAGING REGULATION OF BAD ACTORS for once in your pathetic, wealth-fellating EXISTENCES, you shallow, self-serving cocksuck…Ahem. I’m terribly sorry, was this mike on?”
If he gets re-confirmed, we ARE freakin’ doomed.
Go Wobblies!
Workers of the World, UNITE!!!
Lookit’ the whores calling each other names! Why, it’s almost enough to restore ones faith in Democracy. I hope Ben Bernanke pulls off his earings and they go at at it “Jerry Springer” style.
Bernanke: ” Oh no you did’i say dat, Senator Bumb’a snatch!”
Bumbersnatch:” Now see here, Chairman Bernanke, as the leader of all illegal activities in Casablanca, I am an influential and respected man…what are you going to do with that chair?”
That’d be some legislatin’ worth watchin….
Another day spent playing musical chairmen.
Hey, we need those Wobs to run our book co-ops and anarcha-feminist coffeeshops and shit, not our banks! (They’d just spend the money on songbooks and bindles.)
[re=470785]hockeymom[/re]: Yup. And they also refuse to spread their oh-so-charitable Christianity to the gehz. Also.
Looks like we got us the makin’s for a good ol’ fashioned WHORE-OFF!
Who will be better at delivering the classic “Bitch betta have ma munny!” imprecation?
[re=470787]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: Press release later in the day: “What Chairman Bernanke meant to say was that the Senate Banking Committee contains some of the greatest minds in what is itself widely known* as the World’s Greatest Deliberative Body. The Chairman regrets any confusion his statement to the committee may have caused.”
*to itself
[re=470785]hockeymom[/re]:
5.1
Also! The Salvation Army won’t hire the gays or the nonchristians which I occasionally like to tell the damn bell ringers at the grocery stores.
[re=470778]Mr Blifil[/re]: Oh hey, no problem man.
/reaches for wallet
[re=470787]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: That is some good rantin’ right there.
So my choices are Noam Chomsky or the Wobblies? Can I just write in Captain Lou Albino?
[re=470787]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: They are clearly worried about some rightie dressing up little bobby in a shiny suit and a feather boa and secretly taping him getting a toy without having to prove his citizenship. If that happened, congress would have to close them down, the end.
Isn’t there some former head of Goldman Sachs we can hire for this job so he can funnel all the remaining money to current Goldman Sachs employees?
[re=470788]proudgrampa[/re]: This explains Ben’s epiphany of yesterday (or what it the day before) where he said, oh yeah, those bubbles should be burst early and often. Forget what and my holy mentor haz been saying lo these decades of debt building and middle-class destroying.
[re=470785]hockeymom[/re]: That’s the most depressing thing I have heard lately, and we’ve all heard a lot of depressing things lately. That is UnAmerican, unChristian, un Salvation Army and unbelievable.
The photo is of Bernanke watching a bunch of overpaid losers. Talk about a busman’s holiday.
[re=470797]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: that’s RIGHT. I’d forgotten about teh gehz thing. Which makes them double-fucking-grinches.
[re=470776]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Ken walked through America, remember? Or at least the dry parts.
(5) was meant sarcastically, right? Or at least ironically?
I suggest we all suspend judgement on Ben B. until Michelle Bachmann weighs in, then – like – go the other way.
[re=470877]germansteel[/re]: Why wait? Her sensei, Ron Paul, has already decreed that he is The Great Satan.
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