• May 27, 2012

Awkward Video Moments Preserved Forever: Barack Obama Pardons a Turkey

by Ken Layne  10:14 pm November 25, 2009


In the days before YouTube, our computers were pretty safe from stuff like this. But, as slaves to audio-visual technology, we must now be exposed to moments best captured by a single photograph — as in turkey pardons of past presidencies — and then quickly forgotten. Here, President Obama again shows his cruel elitism, as he “jokes” about wishing he was doing something other than “pardoning a turkey and sending it to Disneyland.” Maureen Dowd is going to lose her shit. But what about the YouTube commenters?

  • wake up people, the new world order has hijacked our nation/world..we need to stand up to tyranny and defend freedom and liberty..check out my page to get informed
  • He IS a Hero.
    Wathever happens
    Wathever others say
    Lóóóve this vid!!!
  • Obama should be focusing on the economy and the war instead of playing with turkeys.
  • This is a presidential tradition done every year. Bush did it too after 9/11. Doesn’t take much time or thought process….
  • I will think of the NATIVE AMERICAN
    AMERICAN INDIANS. and mourn!
    NICA TLACA,ANAHUAC.
  • Have you ever been attacked by a turkey? I had one jump at my face those fuckers know how to take a man down
  • Its a white turkey, not your traditional bronze/black. Im I right in saying that its traditional in the USA at thanksgiving to pardon a turkey?
  • why are we being drawned into a war. I thought we were to pick our own fights. You can’t win a fight that you are being pulled into. Far more of our boys have lost there life then the ememy we fight. At this rate we will never win the war. why do we have the right to defend our country but Irael doesn’t? And the president should not put his children on show where is his wife she should be there with the family always by her husband side. I don’t think the president is really calling the shot
  • and so the status-quo continues . . .

[YouTube]

{ 63 comments }

memzilla November 25, 2009 at 10:22 pm

Even better, for Lou Dobbs: it was a Mexican turkey, which will now spend the rest of its life eating Government feed, consuming Government issued free healthcare and hatching a clutch of anchor turklings.

depraved indifference engine November 25, 2009 at 10:34 pm

Would that be a coffee ememy or the regular soapy water kind? He should totally consider GoLitely. You don’t have to insert anything into your rectum, and the results are COMPLETE.

stumpycuse November 25, 2009 at 10:39 pm

“It’s a good looking bird” translation: “That bird can be fried, right?”

Holy Cow!! November 25, 2009 at 10:46 pm

It’s just embarrassing.

Lefty Lucy November 25, 2009 at 10:57 pm

The girls are so adorable. “Dad REALLY? So we’re having ham or TOFU or something?”

Radiotherapy November 25, 2009 at 10:58 pm

[re=466875]memzilla[/re]: Yeah that lucky turkey, just gobbling up its piece of the American pie and stuffing its gizzard with the gravy train of Obama’s radical Marxist redistribution agenda.

Humpback November 25, 2009 at 10:59 pm

Actually, for several of the turkeys in the early 2000′s, Cheney found a legal loophole in the presidential pardons. He had those birds recaptured and sent to CIA safe houses where they were interrogated roughly, but none ever gave actionable intelligence. Back then, intelligence was in short supply.

Mr Blifil November 25, 2009 at 11:00 pm

The focus on turkey may be traditional and suchlike, but WHY NOT ONE WORD ABOUT THE ARMENIAN GENOCIDE?

Lefty Lucy November 25, 2009 at 11:01 pm

“Can’t we just have Levi naked on a stick? We can? Oh, COOL!”

Suds McKenzie November 25, 2009 at 11:07 pm

At least he didn’t bow to the Turkey… he didn’t did he?

stumpycuse November 25, 2009 at 11:09 pm

[re=466884]Humpback[/re]: yes, I remember the “fly or die” policy.

responsible commenter November 25, 2009 at 11:15 pm

He’s got to do this at least three more times.

CanadianBacon November 25, 2009 at 11:19 pm

[re=466890]stumpycuse[/re]: So not only did they use the tv show 24 for inspiration, they also used WKRP in Cincinnati?

BeWoot November 25, 2009 at 11:21 pm

Survivor’s guilt much, Mr. Turkey?

pocket Liz November 25, 2009 at 11:22 pm

[re=466885]Mr Blifil[/re]: I love you.

I appreciate how the girls are dressed like NORMAL children, rather than too formal/not realistic for everyday life, like other former presidential brats.

WadISay November 25, 2009 at 11:34 pm

About time there was a story about some goddam meat on Wonkette. There’s been more stuff about vegetables on here today than Trig Palin’s Facebook page.

ladymacbeth November 25, 2009 at 11:40 pm

what do the turkeys actually do in disneyland? do they have jobs and why don’t hard working mericans have those jobs?

i blame the pilosi socialism america.

BlueStateLibtard November 25, 2009 at 11:40 pm

Alright, Thanksgiving officially ruined, Wonkette. What with the the sad turkeys and the incomprehensible recipes, I’m on a hunger strike. Nothing but beer and nuts for me until Black Friday.

gaterion November 25, 2009 at 11:49 pm

Did he actually get the information from Wikipedia here? Seriously, look up “National Thanksgiving Turkey Presentation” and compare that to what he says.

gaterion November 25, 2009 at 11:56 pm

Also, WHERES THE BIRD CERTIFICATE????

stumpycuse November 25, 2009 at 11:57 pm

[re=466894]CanadianBacon[/re]: precisely. “Turkey Drop” has a whole different meaning in Wyoming.

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 12:02 am

Judging by the reduced size of his snood and wattle, I’m going to assume that Mitch McConnell’s recently had a fair amount of work done.

NYNYNY November 26, 2009 at 12:03 am

“Marxism, like thanksgiving, is an American tradition…wait. Let’s start that again. Ok, now start recording.”

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 12:12 am

[re=466903]gaterion[/re]: Found it!

The wing-nuts swear it’s leg-it, though not knowing what stuffing it’s baste on, your breast is as good as mine.

naveed November 26, 2009 at 12:14 am

I pardon you, turkey!

Johnny Zhivago November 26, 2009 at 12:23 am

Seriously, it’s going to take the election of Sarah Palin to end this stupid nonsense once and for all. “I came down here to pardon ‘ya, but ya know, I’ve decided to make room for ya on Thanksgiving right here in the White House – next to the mashed potatoes – you betcha!”

geminisunmars November 26, 2009 at 12:30 am

[re=466881]Holy Cow!![/re]: Yeah. Too bad he ain’t as smooth as Sarah was last year with her post-pardoning turkey farm visit video op.

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 12:30 am

[re=466888]Suds McKenzie[/re]: You know who else was in favor of appeasing a turkey?

Darkness November 26, 2009 at 12:30 am

[re=466912]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: Just as long as he doesn’t pardon Punxsutawney Phil for taking away our winters.

imissopus November 26, 2009 at 12:52 am

What was with him waving his hand over the turkey during the pardon? Was that some sort of muslin terrorist hypnotist thing? Nice try NObama.

I-man November 26, 2009 at 1:09 am

Damn you Obama and your irrepressibly cute children.

Radiotherapy November 26, 2009 at 1:29 am

[re=466914]Extemporanus[/re]: Uhh, Neville Chambirdlain?

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 1:38 am

[re=466882]Lefty Lucy[/re]: [re=466920]I-man[/re]: Psst..!

Sasha Obama’s Wonkette handle is user-of-owlspass it on!

Bearbloke November 26, 2009 at 1:46 am

Happy Turkey Daze, Merika!

While y’all ar stuffin yur face wid Turkey growth-hormones an’ MSG an’ corn syrup, n0BAMA’S LIE-BRUL MEDIA has censored the real story ’bout how that color’d muslin USURPER in the WHITE House built by the CHRISTIAN Founders cuz JESUS ‘em to has pardon them too turkeys all rite, but he TRYED, CONVICTED AN EXECUTED a coupla pigs, cuz kenyan muslins like n0Bama’s say them pigs are all Haraam and they don’t like that, no siree bob!

SAY NO TO noBMAMA!!! B.O. STINKS!!!! IWAN MY CUNTRY BACK!!!!! PALIN 2012!!!!!1!!!!

Bearbloke November 26, 2009 at 1:48 am

[re=466925]Extemporanus[/re]: Really? I thought her handle was Neilist… maybe that’s Malia…

Bearbloke November 26, 2009 at 2:24 am

[re=466933]Carly[/re]: LINK WHORE SPAMMER!

I Beseech the Wonkette Gods to SMITE this interloper with the Mighty Bän-Hämmer!!

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 2:25 am

Back in 1492, Christopher Columbus set foot upon what he retardedly assumed to be the eastern coast of India. Believing turkeys to be a variety of peacock (?!), he named them “tuka”, which was Indian (roughly) for “peacock”.

(That this makes little to no sense, and that Native American “Indians” already called them “firkee”, is—like most Native American concerns—largely immaterial.)

Last night, President Obama hosted his first State Dinner, with the Indian prime minister attending as guest of honor. The dining space was decorated in iridescent colors inspired by—and evocative of—a peacock.

Before pardoning the turkey, President Obama remarked “I was gonna eat you, tuka!”

So, with that in mind, I have one simple question: Are you listening, Glenn Beck?

ARE. YOU. LISTENING??2

Jim89048 November 26, 2009 at 2:41 am

Marion Robinson had such plans for this turkey! Way to fuck that shit up, Barry!

LowerdPeninsula November 26, 2009 at 2:58 am

[re=466938]Extemporanus[/re]: I was wondering where you were going with that incoherent babble, and then it all made sense at the end. It’s from the Glenn Beck School of “If A = B, than B must = Z”. Well done; here’s your diploma.

memzilla November 26, 2009 at 2:58 am

[re=466937]Bearbloke[/re]: Ken, we agree with our Oz-enabled friend, Bearbloke.

CARLY MUST BE BANNED FOR LINK WHORING.

This is for shiznit real. Please coat the Banhammer with a delicious maple glaze and pound this idiot back to the Infomercial Universe from which it slinked (slunk?).

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 3:02 am

[re=466930]Bearbloke[/re]: Sasha’s t-shirt tipped me off to her true identity.

As for Malia, an exhaustive analysis of sentence structures, syntax markers, and preferred firearm makes and models has led me to conclude that Malia is in fact magic titty, and that Neilist is the nom de Wonkette of Rahm Emanuel.

[re=466928]Bearbloke[/re]: Is it true that the English celebrate “Thanksgetting” in commemoration of them getting rid of all the hooligans and whores whose descendents now call Oz home?

(Full Disclosure: I’m related to hooligans and whores who involuntarily embarked upon a one-way cruise to koala-ville.)

memzilla November 26, 2009 at 3:03 am

[re=466945]memzilla[/re]: Besides, it’s Thanksgiving… we want turkey, not spam.

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 3:05 am

[re=466933]Carly[/re]: WTF CARLYFORNIA?!

Pimping for Ron Paul is no way to win a governorship!

nbawriter November 26, 2009 at 4:00 am

Keep fuckin’ that chicken, turkey.

iwillsavethispatient November 26, 2009 at 4:08 am

[re=466949]nbawriter[/re]: That’s the best way to create a Turducken.

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 4:14 am

[re=466923]Radiotherapy[/re]: Nearly forgot to mention: Nice!

[re=466944]LowerdPeninsula[/re]: Thank you—I’ll take my diploma off the air.

gurukalehuru November 26, 2009 at 6:06 am

[re=466933]Carly[/re]: Normally, I try to avoid the banhammer lynch mob mentality, partly because I like being led to other sites, and secondly because I’m probably going to be doing a bit of blogwhoring of my own, soon as I set up a blog, but I’ll make an exception in your case. Banhammer, please.

Also, Sarah Palin forever owns the Turkey Pardoning moment

Paul Tardy November 26, 2009 at 7:09 am

Does this mean that Turkey is officially of the list for regime change? Yeah Turkey.

Binky November 26, 2009 at 7:34 am

Did someone mention hooligans and whores? I’ll bring the left-overs … and a corkscrew. I hate turkey. Never give a turkey an even break, unless it’s the wishbone.

graceless November 26, 2009 at 7:35 am

Where’s the video of Sarah Palin’s interview? The one where she’s standing in front of the turkey slaughter?

Terry November 26, 2009 at 7:45 am

[re=466946]Extemporanus[/re]:

You’re a resident of Koala-ville? Here’s something I’ve wondered since I was a kid. Why do you all want to tie your wallabies down? Seems kind of mean.

Binky November 26, 2009 at 7:54 am

Sarah is giving Lou Dobbs a helicopter ride along the Mexican border today. In a sign of reaching out to that country Lou will be snorting a chicken enchilada while singing Besame Mucho.

Terry November 26, 2009 at 8:34 am

[re=466960]Terry[/re]:

Pardon me, it’s the kangaroos that you all seem intend on tying down. The question stands. Why?

Country Club Jihadi November 26, 2009 at 9:23 am

I’m sure Courage’s nickname is “Jive”.

sezme November 26, 2009 at 11:59 am

We will never win the war on turkeys if we keep bowing down to them and granting them pardons. Presidential pardons should be reserved for true sociopaths like Nixon, and Cheney Bows should be reserved for despots like Pinochet, Musharraf and Somoza.

Speaking of which, has anyone ever had a turkey samosa? Delicious!

sludjbunni November 26, 2009 at 11:59 am

[re=466945]memzilla[/re]: slank… equals slunk plus skank

Brendan M. November 26, 2009 at 12:54 pm

[re=467008]sludjbunni[/re]: Wait, I thought that was a slanket?

Extemporanus November 26, 2009 at 2:26 pm

[re=466960]Terry[/re]: [re=466969]Terry[/re]: Oh, no, I’m not from that oversized island that time forgot—I have ancestors on my dad’s side who were shipped there when Yurp decided it had had enough of them.

A prized family scrapbook possession is a wanted poster written entirely in Australian offering a reward equivalent to about 100 American dollars for facilitating the dead or alive delivery of my great-great Uncle(?), whose name appears in super big, bad, bold, Black Bart-style type.

They never got him. And thus a fetish for marsupial BDSM was able to spread throughout the land, ulitmately becoming the defining national pasttime that it is today.

Cleopatra Schwartz November 26, 2009 at 5:20 pm

Next year, Obama will just pardon a head of arugala and a skinny latte.

Marlowe November 26, 2009 at 7:10 pm

While watching the tape, I finally realized why the wingnuts, oily teats, and skoalrebels are nuts.
Not only is there a black guy in the WhiteHouse, but there are three more (wife and kids).
The hatred must burn.

(PS I’m a visual learner)

Pat Pending November 27, 2009 at 12:50 pm

FAKE! That turkey has breast implants!

LazyEyedFerret November 28, 2009 at 11:12 am

i do have to admit that the POTUS have a nice down to earth vibe about him.i like that he at a event never stopped being a real dad. that says alot.

Neilist November 28, 2009 at 7:53 pm

[re=466946]Extemporanus[/re]: “As for Malia, an exhaustive analysis of sentence structures, syntax markers, and preferred firearm makes and models has led me to conclude that Malia is in fact magic titty, and that Neilist is the nom de Wonkette of Rahm Emanuel.”

No, No, NO!

“Rahm Emanuel” is only my COVER identity. In Real Life, I’m actually Dan Quai . . . Qual . . . Quayl . . . Oh, hell.

You know, the Ken Doll who was Vice President under the “smart” President Bush?

(Although, unlike Ken and Dan, I have a penis. And it’s not named “Marilyn Quayle.”)

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