causal relationships

Freepers Are Going To Protest Existence Of Muslims By Boycotting Best Buy

OH woah woah woah, Best Buy has wished Muslims a Happy Eid al-Adha, the Islamic festival of sacrifice during which Muslims are traditionally encouraged to donate to charity?? Uhh nice try. Free Republic will boycott Best Buy now, just cold won’t shop there anymore, maybe it’ll even go out of business, right? And when all those Best Buy employees lose their jobs, terrorism/Muslims will be FINITIO.

And why did the Muslims hijack that polka dot and fly it into the SHOP THANKSGIVING rectangle? Does anyone on Free Republic have a copy of the Koran and/or the instructions to one of Best Buy’s terror electronics handy? Please look this up.

A-ha! An inside job! But the Islamics have the Freepers surrounded on their own turf!! The Muslims have also infiltrated America’s mosques.

Related video

We’ll boycott the Mosques, too. Go to Sears or whatever instead.

[Free Republic]

(Happy Eid al-Adha, Festival of 9/11, to tipster “Nicholas D.”)

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About the author

Juli Weiner was Wonkette's beloved intern and books columnist and then morning editor until she was hired away by Vanity Fair in 2010.

View all articles by Juli Weiner

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100 comments

  1. WickedWitch

    I’m gonna go buy my universal mount at Best Buy now.

    Don’t ask me what I’m gonna use it for — that’s PERSONAL.

  2. Decker

    Of course Freepers object to any goat having its throat slit. Goats are fer a’courtin’ and a’wooin’.

  3. FlownOver

    There are plenty of other reasons not to deal with Best Buy – like because they suck. So in this scenario of Best Buy, muslins and freepers, whose enemy is whose enemy is whose friend, etc.?

    My brain hurts. Help me, Wonkette – you’re my only hope.

  4. Serolf Divad

    What’s worse is: I have it on good authority that Best Buy is going to boycott Christmas this year. Seriuosly. They’re even closing their stores Dec. 20-24 in an effort to smear the name of Baby Jesus.

    Don’t believe me? Fine. If Best Buy doesn’t boycott Christmas then you can be all: “I told you so” on Dec. 26th. But until then… well… you just watch!

  5. ManchuCandidate

    Wait till they get the ads with “Happy Kwanzaa” on them. After that they’ll shake off the cheeto dust and then break out the torches and and cum stained white sheets.

  6. Formerly Preferred

    Another commenter writes:

    “I would rather stick a very private and important part of my anatomy in a meat grinder than to shop at Best Buy.”

    Possibly he will do this before reproducing, in honor of Darwin Day.

  7. BeWoot

    Conservative Christianity=attenuated charity.

    Mohammad died of old age. If God really loved him, he would have had him killed before natural causes had a chance to kick in.

  8. Redhead

    Oh is THAT why Circuit City went out of business? An unfortunate advertising choice that pissed off the all-mighty freepers?

    But really, if Best Buy goes out of business too, where am I supposed to buy my big screen tv and my blu ray and my 5 remote controls and my dvds and all the other things that make me a wonderful, overweight, inactive, brain-dead true ‘Merikan? Radio Shak???

  9. freakishlystrong

    Wal-Mart is evil because all the things they sell are from China.
    Can’t do Sam’s either because they are part of W-M.
    Target kept the Salvation Army out.
    Costco & Amazon are run by liberals.
    Most chain grocery stores are staffed by unionized employees.
    Scratch Best Buy of the list now.

    The only acceptable FReeper shopping location is the St. Vincent de Paul Thrift Store (unless you take shots at Catholics).

    So the thrift store is it-unless of course, you hate Catholics as well. Keep going Freeptards!

  10. Monsieur Grumpe

    I live in the Minneapolis area and I happen to know that Best Buy Corporate is NOT overrun with ragheads. It is actually infested with dipshits.

  11. snideinplainsight

    Eid al-Adha (Arabic: عيد الأضحى‎ ‘Īdu l-’Aḍḥā) “Festival of Sacrifice” or “Greater Eid” is a holiday celebrated by Muslims (including the Druze) worldwide to commemorate the willingness of Ibrahim to sacrifice his son Ismael to a large, white whale.

  12. RoscoePColtraine

    “I am buying both a laptop and desktop for myself this year and will get one of my daughters (the oldest) a laptop. My youngest continues to be a disappointment so she will not be recieving much…”

    That’s a cut and paste, I didn’t spice it up one bit. This just proves again that we create god in our own image. I find that when I troll freeperland, it’s more enjoyable when you look for the humor deep within the crazy.

  13. Ted Kennedy Breakdancing

    [re=464907]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: God damn you, I was getting ready to cut and paste that gem.

  14. Gorillionaire

    Ha, sure freepers, like you can afford to buy anything at Best Buy to begin with. Obesity and retardation still do not make you qualify for %100 disability.

  15. CycloneArmageddon

    [re=464905]snideinplainsight[/re]: In direct contrast to the holiday Christmas, to commemorate the willingness of God to lock everyone inside shopping malls and populate the surrounding parking lots with zombies.

  16. Buzz Feedback

    Everytime I go into BB there’s all that chanting and bowing and it smells like lamb and all the little Kasims are playing Kill the Infidel on the Wii and I can barely hear myself think. Hey Ahmed where’s the SD cards I gotta get outta here kthxbi.

  17. Extemporanus

    Freepers just wish that the true meaning of Black Friday had remained as our Founding Fathers originally intended: holiday shopping for sale priced slaves.

    They really do make excellent gifts.

  18. SayItWithWookies

    Protesting a holiday because it celebrates one of The LORD’s most passive-aggressive, pathological manipulative episodes? No, of course not — protest it because it’s the wrong version of the god having the same damn passive-aggressive, pathological manipulative episode. America is marching towards moranism, and the Freepers are — for once — on the front lines.

  19. Sparky McGruff

    [re=464902]chascates[/re]: The Fundies are boycotting the Gap because they use ‘happy holidays’ instead of “Happy Jesus Day” which they say encourages wiccans to practice witchcraft.

    Yeah, like the Free Republic Fundies frequent the Gap to buy their XXL sweatpants and XXXL “NOBAMA” T-shirts. They would only go to the Gap if it was the only source of Cheeto-stain resistant clothes in town.

  20. McDuff

    “My youngest continues to be a disappointment so she will not be recieving much…

    … because she keeps saying how ‘cool and neat’ Obama is and how great it was he got elected.”

  21. JMP

    [re=464907]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: That’s OK, the great parent can just tell the girl that it’s because she’s bad and so Santa/Jesus hates her. Actually, the one myth helps prepare kiddies for belief in the other here…

  22. Jerri

    Hahha, that’s a good one. As if those nerds could ever stay away from Best Buy. They’ll last 3 days, maybe a week and then some new WOO HOO MURIKA soldier video game will come out and they’ll all be in line on release day with their dicks in one hand, wallets in the other while their moms wait in the parking lot to give them a ride back home to the basement.

  23. The Decider

    [re=464907]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: I would love to have a beer with that guy and hear about his “disappointments”.

  24. Joshua Norton

    So are they going to put a “Bomb Fixin’s” rack next to the big screen TV dept?

    If Best Buy wasn’t infested with employees of Olympian level suckage, I might give a damn. Most of them are too busy playing with the Wii’s and the laptops to deign to sell you one.

  25. Mr Blifil

    I feel for the commenter who is discomfited by the presence of a mosque and Best Buy in close proximity to his place of abode. If only someone would propose some kind of solution for this problem that might offer a sense of finality.

  26. Joshua Norton

    What the frig is all this “Black Friday” crapola anyhoo? Until recently, it just used to be known as The Day After Thanksgiving. Now some Mad Man Moron stuck a name on it to make it a kind of quasi-holiday. Didn’t do a lot of good for Black Tuesday, now did it?

  27. snideinplainsight

    You know, it seems like they begin the War on Christmas earlier every year. I swear, I went down to the mall for some back-to-school sale to get sneakers for kids, and they had War on Christmas decorations all up already. I hadn’t even brought in the garden hose yet! They’re playing their War on Christmas music everywhere, and they’ve got all their War on Christmas tinsel and ornaments dangling from the atrium and the food court, and they’ve got all their War on Christmas trees and merchandise in the windows and their little War on Christmas fliers with coupons already. I can’t keep up. Before you know it it’ll be War on Presidents’ Day.

  28. Servo

    Uh, Freepers, why don’t you boycott the source of all that gas you unquestionably pour into your Ford Stupid Duty dualies? That office is full o’ ragheads, too.

  29. problemwithcaring

    Well, we can all agree that opening a Best Buy is probably the worse thing that could happen to the town of Standish, MI.

  30. Joshua Norton

    [re=464962]snideinplainsight[/re]: Are you kidding? The shopping channels have been going full-tilt boogie into Xmas since July. If they don’t have the trees up by Labor Day heads roll!

  31. RoscoePColtraine

    [re=464934]JMP[/re]: So there’s really only two ways of exerting control over someone: shower them with goodies when they please you, and, when that fails, threaten them with terrible prolonged agony if they don’t shape up. Then you can pour out your frustration and disappointment on the blog with all the other gods.

  32. Redhead

    [re=464979]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: That sounds dirty. Like a Republican tapping the stall door, right next to his 13-year-old page. Or something.

  33. Accordion-o-rama

    [re=464907]RoscoePColtraine[/re]: “continues to be a disappointment” = still refuses to put out.

  34. Humpback

    You know, if we can sneak a few more of these other-religion holiday greetings into various ads, soon the freepers will have so many boycotts going that they will all be shivering naked in their bare-walled hovels.

  35. S.Luggo

    What the freepers object to is the stores celebration of islamo-socialist explosive devices. You know, EIDs.

  36. vitira

    Hey former intern Juli, I believe the Wonkette Style Book prefers the spelling “Muslin” although I could be wrong.

  37. SayItWithWookies

    [re=464960]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: You know your deity’s in the shitter when his hip young spokesperson is Stephen Baldwin.

  38. Redhead

    [re=465002]grendel[/re]: The turkeys chop off their own heads. It’s obviously an inside jihadist Muslin plot. Suicide choppers.

  39. lawrenceofthedesert

    [re=464961]Joshua Norton[/re]: “Black Friday” is nostalgia for those historical times when the day after Turkeyfest would be when retail chains began to turn a profit for the year; now, of course, its proper name could be You Can See Chapt. 13 From Here Day.

    Bright spot: if the wingnuts really do stay away from Best Buy, the stores will be able to narrow their aisle size.

  40. snideinplainsight

    Q: Why didn’t the Best Buy cashier come into work on Eid al Adha?
    A: Because she called in Sikh!

    I crack me up.

  41. Mad Brahms

    [re=465042]snideinplainsight[/re]: An Indian friend of mine once asked me if there were “a lot of Sikh people in Canada”, to which I unthinkingly replied “what, do you mean from swine flu?”. For a moment – before I figured out what he meant – I think I understood what it feels like to be Sarah Palin

  42. Extemporanus

    [re=465042]snideinplainsight[/re]: [re=465054]Mad Brahms[/re]:

    The sixth Sikh sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick.

  43. Larry McAwful

    Now that those Freepers have exposed them, it looks like the axis of American Moslems, PETA and Best Buy is going to come undone. Finally. That unholy tripartite has been controlling America long enough.

  44. agonista

    The wignuts would starve to death here in Dearborn, as both the Big Boy and KFC make a point of serving halal meat…

  45. doloras

    [re=464924]SayItWithWookies[/re]: A religion nerd writes: interestingly, in the Muslim version of the story, Abraham’s son knows what he’s being taken up the mountain for and is cool with doing God’s will. I’ve always got a creepy child-abuse vibe from the Judeo-Christian version.

  46. doloras

    [re=465079]Cheney Guevara[/re]: The Torah says it was Isaac, ancestor of the Jews; the Qur’an says it was Ishmael, ancestor of the Arabs. Funny, that.

  47. JMP

    [re=465102]doloras[/re]: How can you feel that; it’s perfectly natural for a parent to hear the voice of a supernatural being ordering him to kill his child, and then going ahead and carrying out the killing. Not abusive or crazy at all.

  48. Cheney Guevara

    [re=465109]doloras[/re]:

    they’re arguing about whom Isaac loved more (i.e., so much more he was going to cook him).

  49. whiskey tango foxtrot

    New fave comment on the freep thread:
    “I hope Drudge picks this up. Then the story will go mainstream.”

  50. Cheney Guevara

    [re=465109]doloras[/re]:

    they’re fighting over whom Abraham loved more (i.e., whom he was going to cook).

  51. SayItWithWookies

    [re=465102]doloras[/re]: And the Muslim version doesn’t give you a creepy suicide-bomber vibe? I mean, it’s not a great leap from “I’m okay with being sacrificed to Allah” to “I’ll this vest on and go blow myself up in the marketplace.”
    Not that there’d be a purpose for religion at all if it didn’t make it palatable to act abominably.

  52. Mad Brahms

    [re=465090]Morbo the Annihilator[/re]: Minneapolis, I think, which is apparently run by teh muslins now. Though last time I was there it was run by dirty art students, and also hmong immigrants, who are not muslin.

  53. AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=465013]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Christ, the Mac/PC/Muslim/Christian commercials just about write themselves.

  54. Sparky McGruff

    [re=465140]Mad Brahms[/re]: last time I was there it was run by dirty art students, and also hmong immigrants, who are not muslin.

    Good God, do you really think the Freeptards can tell the difference? You could train your dog to tell the difference between Mozart and Bach before you could convince a Freeptard that there are different types of “dirty brown people”.

  55. Darkness

    last year 250 goats gave their lives for that bit of holiday cheer

    OH MY GOD, Islam is run by Turkeys!

  56. Darkness

    [re=464961]Joshua Norton[/re]: It’s been around since the 60s. I blame the business new cable channels for bleeding the word from accountancy/economics into general usage.

  57. justthisonce

    Which is more valuable to wonkette?

    The thanks she gets from the “ex-muslim” (cough..) in chief?

    Discounts from Best Buy for the free politically correct commentary?

    Or is it the laminated “we promise to spare you during jihad, or at least cut your head off last and fast” friend-of-jihad card from the religion of POS that she boosts on a monthly basis?

    (hows that “we should let them have criminal trials in NYC, they won’t be using them for a political statement” working out for you useful idiots?

    Are you going to the hollywierd state dinner? Or did you at least get thank you from Eric Holder, the top pardoner of terrorists and criminals in the last 20 years?)

  58. AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=465311]justthisonce[/re]: It’s the laminated card, for sure. Well, for this wonkette, anyway. Others may prefer the Best Buy discounts.

  59. engulfedinflames

    God said to abraham kill me a son abe said man you must be puttin me on god said no abe said what god said you can do what you want abe but the next time you see me comin you better run. abe said where you want this killin done ? god said out on highway 61…robert zimmerman

  60. Long Form Def Certificate

    [re=464989]Mahousu[/re]: Well, maybe one of them can make amends by taking out that awful, awful Jew that took out Coleman. At the very least, Rep. Ellison could can Franken in the Capitol rotunda.

  61. Mahousu

    [re=465329]engulfedinflames[/re]: Your lyrics are a little off:

    Well, Abe says, “Where do you want this killin’ done?”
    God says, “How about the Target in Bloomington?”

  62. Mahousu

    [re=465355]Mahousu[/re]: Ha, ha. That was supposed to be the Best Buy in Bloomington. Way to ruin your own joke, idiot.

  63. doloras

    [re=465138]SayItWithWookies[/re]: I don’t buy the narrative that “suicide bombing” is any more atrocious than bombing where the bomber doesn’t kill themselves, eg. from an airplane. Or the narrative that if we were all atheists we would all be kind and rational people. I’d rather hang out with MLK than Christopher Hitchens any day of the week.

  64. SayItWithWookies

    [re=465368]doloras[/re]: Oh, I don’t put any value in atheism for its own sake — it’s at its best when it’s a byproduct of critical thinking. No ism just put on for its own sake will result in anything worthwhile.
    And I’d much rather hang out with Christopher Hitchens than MLK. The morally conflicted are not really much fun to hang out with, and King, as huge as his mark on history is, would not strike me as a neat guy to hang out with. Granted, if I had to put one of them in charge of the country, it would be King. But hang out with him? I’ll take the perpetually inebriated, bitchy, pro-Iraq-invasion atheist any day.

  65. LowerdPeninsula

    So, Best Buy expands to cynically exploiting the Muslim Thanksgiving, like corporations are wont to do, these days, with all religious holidays, and these dumb-and/or-fat-fucks have a fit?

  66. yx9

    The whole point of Christmas is that God gave the PERFECT gift to mankind: his Son. This gift was the lamb of God to pay for all the sins of mankind. The reason that it has become a big holiday for stores is because, in honor of the gift GOD GAVE US, we give gifts to one another. Retailers take advantage of this charitable giving to get back in the black and make their profits. No one, not God, nor Christians, has a problem with commerce. But people aren’t buying gifts for the eid al-adha season, they’re buying it for the Christmas season, in honor of the Messiah.

    Also, faith in and of itself is worthless. It is the OBJECT of that faith which is important. Eid al-adha supposedly commemorates Abraham’s near sacrifice of Ishmael, but the original jewish scriptures say that it was Isaac, not Ishmael, that was to be sacrificed. ~700 years after Jesus came, some guy named Muhammed altered the truth and claimed it was Ishmael, just like he also claimed that Jesus (who they called Isa) didn’t really die on the cross. Islam changes the basic facts about the events of jewish and christian history. The fact of the matter is that Muhammed is a liar, and the religion he created is a lie.

    If you want to embrace all faiths, it is only because you think none of them are accurate, i.e. you are godless and unsaved. Freedom is great, and it is great to live in a country that has freedom to worship whomever you please. But not all faiths lead to salvation. By its very nature, the muslim faith is a works-based salvation with its 5 pillars. If you do certain things and keep certain laws, supposedly allah will save you. But no one can perfectly keep all the laws, which is why Christmas is such a joyous time, because God gave Jesus to us, the perfect Christmas gift, so that sinners could be saved by faith in him.

    Islam twists history to suit its own purposes. Abraham’s near-sacrifice of Isaac, his only son, was foreshadowing God’s coming sacrifice of His only Son Jesus. The gospel is good news because it means we are not required to keep a set of strict laws and ordinances in order to inherit eternal life. Forgiveness of sins comes by faith in 1 man whom God gave as a gift to mankind: Jesus. Just because Muhammed came along ~700 years later and denied and twisted the basic facts of history doesn’t mean that Islam has any basis in reality.

    To those who think all religions are a lie, what do you plan to do when you, like 100% of people in the world, die? Everyone dies. Christmas is symbolic of God’s pardoning of our sin, through the crucifixion and death of his innocent son Jesus on the cross. He that was without sin died for us who are sinners. It is right for anyone who fears and loves God to be angry at Islam and Muhammed for denying the gospel and drawing people away from saving faith in Christ. But our war is not against flesh and blood, it is against spiritual forces. It is not a war fought with guns and knives, but with prayer and fasting.

    If Best buy and gap and other godless institutions of the world want to draw people from all faiths into their stores by pandering to every religion, that’s their choice and they will benefit or suffer from that choice financially as some muslims go there or other Christians boycott them. We Christians do not expect the world to behave like the church. The church is separated from the world, sanctified, and born again.

    To those who are furious, I would remind you of Jesus saying “let he who is without sin, cast the first stone”. We are all sinners. The anger about this eid al-adha thing is that Christmas is unique in that God gave us a Gift and so we give gifts to others. What good has islam ever brought to the world? They have done nothing more than try to put another yoke, another law, on the necks of those who are unable to keep the law. No one can perfectly keep the law except for Jesus, which is why his sacrifice on the cross was so important.

    If you want to live forever, repent and be baptized in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

  67. LowerdPeninsula

    [re=465970]yx9[/re]: Really, just fuck off. There is anything more appropriate I could have said than that.

  68. Hans Wurst

    ON Eid, Muslims slit the throat of a mamal and let it die an excruciating death. Fully conscious, the animal has a painful and bloody death. To wish well for this, see something “Happy” in this barbaric and gruesome bloodfest goes against my enlightened values, and I will boycott Best Buy.

  69. digibal235

    “I’d rather be beaten and crucified than have to shop for electronics at Sears.”

    ~ Jesus Christ.

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