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Yes yes yes yes. One million copies please. [Tea Party Movie]
BIG SERIOUS IDEAS
The ‘Tea Party: The Documentary Film’ Trailer!! (’Liberty’s March Has A New Generation Of Patriots’)
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12:31 PM
on Fri November 20 2009
By
Juli Weiner
3060 Views
Oh, I’ve had a yearning inside myself too, buddy.
They were ignored. They were mocked. They were idiots.
What’s wrong with my monitor? It keeps blinking on and off? Must be the damn gummint burocrats tryin ta get between me and my monitor!
I think I’m going to wait until it comes out on eight track tape.
Thanksgiving 2009: a real turkey comes to the big screen.
Can someone please just post the money shots on youtube?
You can hire guys to read better voice overs than this for about $100 at Voice123.com.
How many times could they show Nate in this trailer? Look! Republicans are diverse! Right?
Anyone want to take a bet on how long it would take to find another black person at a teabagger rally?
Morans. The movie.
Oh,yes, the “Riddled With Bullets” production team has always done fine work.
It’s not a movie about Real Freedumb unless it’s got Chris Farley’s brother in it, like that “A July 4th Carol” or whatever that features gun nuts shooting ACLU members, as is their Constitutional right.
I do like how the One Black Teabagger gets prime billing in the preview, though.
I like the scene around 1:35 with the tiki torch in the foreground and the pensive, thoughtful revolutionary in the background.
Make that 1:01
Tea Party, the Movie. Starring “Crazy Man”, “Doctor”, and featuring “Black Guy” and “Woman”.
In the spirit of the 18th century, lets tar and feather these traitors.
Stick a fork in this Turkey…it’s way over done.
What’s w/all the apocalyptic music in these wingnut videos? Do they really think this is The End of Freedom?
“Dr. Fred” looks like a doctor of buttsechs.
Oh my, someone is praying for a cure to the liberal cancer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BY5z6DUfkKA&feature=player_embedded
glamourdammerung: I love how they kept flashing back to “Nate the black guy” over and over, unlike all the other teabaggers in the video. Maybe they’re hoping their target audience will think it’s multiple black guys. You know, ‘cuz they all look all look alike or something.
Today, we all have a yearning…
It just hit me, fucking Mel Gibson has destroyed this country. You know these freaks love that movie, and the jeebus movie, and for some reason, Braveheart is one of the founding fathers too.
There’s probably a lot of money available to black people who are willing to show up at teabagger rallies. You could probably score big if you wrote and perfomed a teabag rap. Like this, maybe:
Yo, I’m down with the Constitution,
The Ron Paul rEVOLution,
And free-market healthcare as a capitalist institution.
Black people don’t wanna pay taxes
And that’s just what the facts is.
We gonna show you how we gonna go and take our country back, yiz, dawg!
Or something like that. It doesn’t matter if it sounds like it was written by a white boy like me. They won’t know the difference. Make sure you say “Break it down!” a few times. That sounds more authentic to white folks. Trust me, I know!
Skoalrebel was left, no doubt, on the cutting room floor.
Did they have a copyright fight with Hustler over calling it “Teabagging - The Documentary Film”?
Doesn’t something have to happen before you can document it?
Larry McAwful: You REALLY need to visit the link I gave above.
Why does “Fred” never take off his earbuds? Is he actually working for the Secret Service?
glamourdammerung: We all noticed they only used one black guy, the same black guy, throughout. I tend to think they shanghaied him off the street with a crisp $50, to which I say, more power to him.
Has everyone else noticed they use the same announcer that “24″ uses, the guy who sounds like he chews gravel and smokes two packs of Camels a day?
That, along with the insistant ominous drumbeat, marks this as a… hey, you know who else liked to use a stentorian announcer and ominous drumbeats in his “documentaries”… ?
Did you all see the black? They have a black on their side! They’re not just a bunch of racists! He’s just as angry and patriotic as the rest of them — and he’s black! Please tell me you all saw the black. Nope, can’t accuse them of being racist now. They have a black!
TIKI TORCHES! (Look around the 1 minute mark). My home movies when I was a kid had better production values. They couldn’t get a simple torch going?
I’m glad they found the one black guy there, made him a subject of the documentary, and never told him to take out his hands-free earpiece. Watch out Errol Morris!
memzilla: Hey, it takes a lot of work to get a voice like that!
At the end of the day..what is the purpose of this? So they can prance around in Patriot drag and play at being “Revolutionary’s”? TBaggerz is weird.
It’s obviously fiscally conservative to lose a bunch of money making a movie about idiots. Ishtar shall be their rallying cry.
Gotta love the “Freedom Works Foundation” placard prominently on display while that woman talks. Dick Armey gets to plug his company AND flagrantly flaunt how he pulls the wool over the tards’ eyes at once!
I call rights on the Kenneth Gladney Story, starring Jimmy JJ Walker! Dynomite!
Almost as good as Tracy Jordan’s “Jefferson” - where he played all three roles of Thomas Jefferson, Sally Hemmings, and King George!
“Congress, can you hear us now? The small part of the minority of the U.S. citizens that we are, as we stamp our feet and whine because I waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaant it and I want it NOW, can you hear us?!
What, son? No, you canNOT have chocolate for dinner! Because I said so, now stop your whining and your tantrum, mommy has important things to do, like making sure the government does what I want and protects heterosexual marriage and no taxes and no socialist-nazi programs and an all-white America, because that’s what I want!”
Never before in the history of human events have so many sweaty balls been dipped into the waiting ravening mouths of so few…
RoscoePColtraine: Hence the use of the Boogety Boogety Nobama mask is fair game.
Sharkey: Holy shit! I swear to God I didn’t see that before I wrote my white conservative rap, yo! I really am a white nerd who knows how to write pathetic rap lyrics that can trick anyone who’s never met more than four black people into thinking it’s the real deal.
That’s a great link, by the way. “Hi Caliber”’s hard-on for Monica Crowley amuses me. If I did a pathetic white-boy rap, I’d at least have the dignity to spare Amy Klobuchar such a shout-out at the end of mine, though I’d definitely be tempted to give her one.
Larry McAwful: Not “gangster” enough
And if those suckas want cloture to pass
We gon’ bust a fat cap in they ass–
Nelson, Landrieu, Lieberman, and Lincoln
I’m gon’ give ‘em some gin and juice I’m drinkin’.
Etc. etc. etc.
Holy crap, they hired that movie trailer guy that does the WAIT………… is OVER!!!11!
I love that guy.
He is the primary indicator that the MOVIE……… SUCKS
who needs Ebert?
Umm… I seriously thought this was a spoof. WOW, just WOW.
RoscoePColtraine: They did have to edit out the footage where the black guy gets followed around by the other “patriots” while they scream “He works for Egg-Cawn! Egg-cawn!”. At least those tiki torches came in handy for something.
glamourdammerung: They could just pull a Fox News and splice it with footage of the Million Man march. Problem solved.
Larry McAwful: To tell the truth I didn’t even watch the whole thing. Not enough … well … everything that’s supposed to be in a rap video.
Sharkey:
That’s great link, if that guy is from PA, I think I held him down in Northest Penitentiary during a cell block party. I never forget a real purty mouth.
kasdc: I hear you. I think this is a corollary to Poe’s Law.
http://rationalwiki.com/wiki/Poe%27s_Law
Ever notice that with wingnutz you can switch the words “patriot” with “idiot” and “Christian” with “bigot” at random and not change the meaning of one thing they’re saying?
skutre: Uh huh. Why don’t you tell us what you did time for?
Dave J.: Okay, I’ll try for more gangsta. How’s this:
The Second Amendment will protect our nation
From the Senate Rules Committee’s reconciliation.
We gonna shoot our nines all over DC City
If they even let that bill pass the Senate health committee.
My homies and me rolling around in our Hummer,
Making commie Nazi health care tyrants feel heat like it was summer.
Pumping up the treble as we’re cruising down the Mall,
Country music blasting while we shoot liberals ‘gainst the wall.
Break it on down!
Sharkey: Heh… suffice it to say, it’s probably everything you imagined it to be. Not that one needs much imagination for it, but still.
Cicada: “Egg-Cawn” is my new favorite WOTD. Thanks.
It began with a shot of the worst production name in history (Riddled With Bullets? Seriously???
It faded in to a montage of the most absurd imagery imaginable (cut to shot of Pirates of the Caribbean extras saying smarmy shit that even they don’t think is clever)
It was scored with a soundtrack stolen from the worst straight-to-video action movie you could find gathering dust on the shelves at Blockbuster.
It introduced you to Nate, the black guy.
It cut to Nate again.
It cut to Nate again.
It cut to Nate a third time (or was it the fourth).
It forgot to obscure the “FreedomWorks” logo on the front of the podium the jowly teabag lady was yelling from.
I’m guessing Nate the black tea bagger gets more air time in the movie than all others combined. Because Liberty’s March has a new generation of self-loathing Negroes.
freakishlystrong: What is the purpose of this? At the end of the day it’s to snigger about n****rs, but they need to hold hands while doing it, because they have a deep fear of being yelled at.
This fear was instilled in them when they were preverbal, hence they spent a lot of time while most kids acquire language, worrying about being yelled at and/or hit. As a result, now that they are all growed up, they feel left out, held back, excluded, and diminished. Justifiably so. A lot of these people never stood a chance in life, their fate was determined by the time they were 2 years old.
RoscoePColtraine: I believe the correct term is “Teablacker.”
eclecticbrotha: I’m wondering why Nate wasn’t dressed in periodic attire as well.
NEEDZ MOOR TRUKNUTZ
I was hoping that the old generation of Patriots, like Irving Fryar or Ivy Joe Hunter, would appear on the scene and stiff-arm them into the ground.
See also this.
Sharkey: Why don’t you tell us what you did time for?
What did I do time for?
Because they made me, it’s like mandatory when things get ugly.
duhhhhh
I still prefer “Triumph of the Will.”
I kasdc: No kidding. Maybe it’s satire, but you can’t tell because it’s soooooooooo good.
Also, “Dr. Fred?” Isn’t he from Maniac Mansion?
What’s with the costume guys dressing as Hessians and British? Symbolic of hating Congress?? Actually, the real purpose of this is at the end: “PRE-ORDER YOUR DVD STARTING MONDAY”- somebody is working on their own stimulus plan!
OK, this probably won’t embed because I am a total HTML moran but this was all I could think of during that closing “Tea Party: The Movie” or whatever:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTU2He2BIc0
I think that the voice over guy they got is someone who SOUNDS like the famous voice-over guy with the gravelly voice. But it is not him.
I wonder how far you have to dig to find out that this was produced/funded by Freedom Works, or some group like that.
I liked this movie better when it was called “2012.”
Great. Another fucking remake.
Love the gay clothes, I’m sure they adored donning their apparel.
Is it possible to make a pornographic parody of a documentary?
A lot of things would be better with the addition of space orcs. Just sayin’
My only question is this…..
Where did they find the black man??
If you look closely, the movie’s African-American is THE ONLY dark face in the ENTIRE crowd!
Oh god oh god oh god oh god. I am 10,000% sure I am in this piece of shit. I was there as a photographer.
Oh god.
Couldn’t they have gotten Chuck Norris, Jon Voight, or one of the other four Hollywood tea-baggers to consult? Amateur hour, dude.
Wait…wait…wait…the British had tiki torches? Did they also love pina coladas? And getting caught in the rain?
I saw the black guy! Over and over and over again. Funny how the thought of extending health care to more people is what gets these idiots’ panties in a twist. Compassion is too expensive and an example of flagrant government overreach, but getting mired in unnecessary wars and occupying other countries is A-OK. Morans. Also.
Is that the guy who played Token on South Park? I love that guy, I’ve been wondering what he’s been up to!
ivenson: Was that right before the Tribe voted? [Also: J'm not talking about Lawrence, either.]
glamourdammerung: Not long - aren’t we all Kenneth Gladney?
memzilla: The “gargles with DrainO” guy?
V572625694:
Dr. Fred is Fred S. Shessel M.D., a urologist from Atlantic (always ask him to scrub his paws in Ajax before you shake hands). His forte is vasectomies. Also, “Old yellow hands” is VP of Doctors4Patients, anti-ObamaCare cabal of socialism hatin’, freeper docs.
In 1984 anti-government Fred and two other specialists sued the Reagan administration. Fred + his buds alleged that a continuation of a cap on Medicare payments to non-Medicare participating docs (Fred and friends) was a confiscation of their property (i.e., their right to get public money for services rendered). Also, Fred and chums protested that Medicare had frozen it’s approved provider list. Life’s a bitch.
Fred lost. Clearly still bitter over the decision. See below.
http://www.kentmbrown.com/PDF/WhitneyvHeckler.pdf
S.Luggo: Not Atlantic, but Atlanta, the vasectomy capital of the Easter Seaboard.
Um, these guys don’t know that the redcoats (i.e., the British) were, uh, not big supporters of “Constitutional rights” in 1776?
Overall, I’m betting this “film” was better in the original German…
Wonder how much they paid “Nate” to be a ‘Tea Bagger for a day’?