• May 27, 2012

John Shadegg Has Watched All ’24′ Seasons 24 Times, So He Knows What’s Up

by Jim Newell  3:39 pm November 17, 2009

Insane Arizona Rep. John Shadegg has some experience with kidnapping children, so he knows what these Muzzies are thinking: “I saw the mayor of New York said today, ‘We’re tough. We can do it.’ Well, Mayor, how are you going to feel when it’s your daughter that’s kidnapped at school by a terrorist?”

We love the choice of “when” instead of “if” instead of “hypothetically, if this played out like a movie, a cool action movie, with lotsa ‘splosives.” It’s just a matter of time, young Miss Bloomberg. WE IZ COMING 4 U. CUZ WE R TERRORISTS NO.

What astonishing pussies we have as leaders in this country. Because congressional Democrats are hardly beacons of light & truth when it comes to brown criminals from Allahstan STEPPIN’ ON OWR MERKIN SOIL WITH THEM STANKY FEETS, either. God help us. Or Jesus, preferably.

[YouTube]

{ 92 comments }

Click November 17, 2009 at 3:42 pm

He don’t know jack.

McDuff November 17, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Nuke’em all and let Kieffer sort’em out.

queeraselvis v 2.0 November 17, 2009 at 3:44 pm

Shaddup, Shadegg, you Shtooopid Shitheaded Shmoe.

chascates November 17, 2009 at 3:44 pm

It’s obvious any jury would hand up a ‘not guilty’ and allow the terrorists to live here as political exiles, running food carts with poisoned falafels and selling The Terrorists’ Bible to anyone willing to destroy their own country, which is about 46% of the population.

Best idea: permanent detention in George W. Bush’s home in Dallas.

ManchuCandidate November 17, 2009 at 3:45 pm

24 is to realistic espionage as Slim Jims are to Grade A Ribeye Steak.

V572625694 November 17, 2009 at 3:45 pm

When Rudy’s the voice of common sense, the term “common sense” ceases to have meaning.

Fox n Fiends November 17, 2009 at 3:46 pm

“Shadegg” is a totally ARAB name

Zadig November 17, 2009 at 3:46 pm

To be fair to Mr. Shadegg, Mayor Bloomberg probably shouldn’t send his daughters to school at Supermax prisons.

SayItWithWookies November 17, 2009 at 3:49 pm

Hi, Mayor Bloomberg — don’t forget that tomorrow’s a busy day here at Gracie Mansion. First of all, it’s Bring Your Daughter to Work Day. And then at 10:30, the folks from the federal prison are bringing the Gitmo terrorists around for a tour. No, they’ll be unshackled and wearing suits — we don’t want to frighten the tourists, after all. Also, a crew will be installing a radar beacon on the roof and painting a large target design around it. Oh, and I almost forgot the ribbon-cutting for the underground parking garage. Busy, busy day.

AggieDemocrat November 17, 2009 at 3:49 pm

“Astonishing pussies” is right. My god, these Republicans are like skeered little cats. My one-year-old niece has more cojones than these fuckwits.

leftcoaster November 17, 2009 at 3:50 pm

I’ve been waiting for step over the line to the ridiculous on this issue. At least now we can all laugh at them instead of trying to take their concerns seriously.

SmutBoffin November 17, 2009 at 3:50 pm

Other amusing wingnut hypotheticals:

1) What if, come KSM’s trial, the defense attorney showed up and it was Osama Bin Laden?
2) What if Michele Bachmann and that Hoffman guy had a baby? Would that be Jesus?
3) What if Woody Harrelson really was a crazy-eyed vet? (Would Money Train have been as good?)
4) What if Barack Obama really was an American citizen?

Buzz Feedback November 17, 2009 at 3:51 pm

We’re tough enough to invade Towel-Head-Land but not tough enough to hold a trial or detain terrorists on U.S. soil? So much sand in the Republican va-jay-jay.

nbawriter November 17, 2009 at 3:52 pm

Is there a stupid contest being held to which I am not privy?

One Yield Regular November 17, 2009 at 3:53 pm

Off message, Representative Shadegg! You’re supposed to say “…when your daughter is kidnapped by a health care reform bill”!

Representative Foxx would like to see you in her office STAT.

chascates November 17, 2009 at 3:54 pm

[re=460839]SmutBoffin[/re]: I hear the theme music from the great show Soap in the background.

JMP November 17, 2009 at 3:54 pm

Hey, that’s not 24. Bauer’s daughter was kidnapped by terrorists while sneaking out of the house at night. Then while running around the city trying to hide from those terrorists. Then she was kidnapped by the wife-beating & killing asshole, then a cougar, then a nutty survivalist, then a convenience-store robber, then the wife-beater again. But she was never kidnapped at school by terrorists.

bitchincamaro November 17, 2009 at 3:55 pm

[re=460826]ManchuCandidate[/re]: He means Bloomie, not Ghouliani. Rudy’s already hit the headlines with his kneejerkery comments. But fuck you anyway, Rudy.

AnnieGetYourFun November 17, 2009 at 3:56 pm

Huh, yeah. I don’t know, maybe it’s because I know so many Muzzies, but if I were going to commit some terror, you can bet kidnapping Bloomberg’s kids wouldn’t be at the top of my list of stuff to drive fear into the heart of Americans.

I’ve never seen 24 – is that what happens on that show?

bitchincamaro November 17, 2009 at 3:56 pm

[re=460826]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Sorry Manchu, that comment was aimed at[re=460828]V572625694[/re]:.

tygzbg1 November 17, 2009 at 3:59 pm

Bloombergs youngest is 26 years old. Is she in school?

DC Hates Me November 17, 2009 at 4:00 pm

In NYC, Shadegg translates as: shut your cornhole, eh?

chascates November 17, 2009 at 4:02 pm

5/24/2007–New York Times Jim Rutenberg:
“Mr. President, yesterday you discussed Osama bin Laden’s plans to turn Iraq into a terrorist sanctuary. What do you think your own reaction would have been five years ago had you been told that towards the end of your term he would still be at large with that kind of capability, from Iraq, no less, and why — can you tell the American people — is he still on the run? Why is he so hard to catch?”

“It’s a danger to your children, Jim, and it’s really important that we do all we can to bring them to justice,” Bush told Rutenberg (who has no children).

coolcatdaddy November 17, 2009 at 4:04 pm

Thank you, Senator, for dropping by. How are you today?

Oh … I see.

You’ve got some more fear you’re selling today?

Just like the fear you were selling a few years ago?

No, I”m sorry – I’m not buying any fear today. But I hear there’s a news reporter and tv producer that have been looking for some fear lately – why don’t you talk with them?

Pompous Magnus November 17, 2009 at 4:05 pm

I thought John Shadegg was dead.

x111e7thst November 17, 2009 at 4:06 pm

Jerrold Nadler seems able to refrain from shitting all over himself in a paroxysm of fear. So that’s something.

sprankles November 17, 2009 at 4:06 pm

wait, we’re jailing terrorists because of political correctness?

i haz a confuze

petehammer November 17, 2009 at 4:06 pm

As someone whose daughter was kidnapped by terrorists*, I can safely say that I would want the terrorists tried in a court of law.

(*Well, to the same degree Shadegg can imagine it).

Also, this one time I fought terrorists and subdued them with non-lethal rounds before arresting them. Those terrorists eventually had to face a judge and jury*. I didn’t kill them, for chrissakes.

(*I assume, because SWAT 4 doesn’t tackle these issues).

SmutBoffin November 17, 2009 at 4:08 pm

[re=460848]chascates[/re]: “Confused? You won’t be – after this episode of SOAP!”

Sleeves November 17, 2009 at 4:10 pm

>STEPPIN’ ON OWR MERKIN SOIL WITH THEM STANKY FEETS

Time for some Austin talent:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpeDAGDcLaM

x111e7thst November 17, 2009 at 4:11 pm

[re=460859]tygzbg1[/re]: Is she the one who rides jumpers and (I think) was long listed for the Olympic team?

Trot Nixon' November 17, 2009 at 4:12 pm

I know someone who watched Die Hard 3 last night!

sati demise November 17, 2009 at 4:12 pm

Shadegg, Kyl and McCain…….Arizonas contribution to the crazy factions. Rated by highest wingnut to lowest:

1. Kyl (right wing asshole)
2. Shadegg (right wing nut)
3. McCain (right wing panderer)

chascates November 17, 2009 at 4:12 pm

[re=460861]chascates[/re]: Same press conference Asked by NBC’s David Gregory why anyone should view him as credible on the war, Bush gave an answer that included this about the terrorists:

“They are a threat to your children, David.”

Larry McAwful November 17, 2009 at 4:12 pm

That’s the thing about terrorists: bullets can’t stop ‘em, bombs can’t stop ‘em, and napalm just makes ‘em mad. So once one of those terrorists sets foot on North American soil, it’s over. He’ll just bust out of any prison and kidnap any schoolgirl and blow her up with his Koran, while facing east, because that’s where the Semitic Liberal Babylon of New York City is. This, I believe, is what’s called Wahhabism. Look it up!

gjdodger November 17, 2009 at 4:13 pm

His speech would have sounded a little different had he delivered that message to Bloomberg’s face, because it’s hard to speak with broken teeth and a fat lip.

Tommmcatt November 17, 2009 at 4:14 pm

[re=460866]Pompous Magnus[/re]:

He got better.

Incidentally, I am glad that someone finally has addressed the jeopardy into which we have placed the jailer’s little brother with this terrible United States Justice System thing.

Carl Spakler November 17, 2009 at 4:15 pm

Bloomberg is simply going to destroy this ass-clown…they’re not even going to be able to find Shadegg’s body when the Mike is done with him.

TGY November 17, 2009 at 4:15 pm

Bloomberg should’ve said ‘Bring it on’, obvs.

Accordion-o-rama November 17, 2009 at 4:16 pm

Perhaps Rep. Shadegg can also inform us who’s the mole in CTU this year.

The Station Manager November 17, 2009 at 4:17 pm

[re=460866]Pompous Magnus[/re]: Only on the inside, Magnus, only on the inside.

vitamins taken helmet on November 17, 2009 at 4:20 pm

If our only choices for help are God or Jeebus, I demand (or respectfully request in a high, urgent voice) a third choice.

JSDC007 November 17, 2009 at 4:20 pm

Ever since Ronald Reagan confused films with reality, his flock of crazed Reagan lovers think its fine to conflate the two. I say, throw this fat redneck onto a 24 set, light some firecrackers around him and watch him scream like a girl.

iwillsavethispatient November 17, 2009 at 4:23 pm

[re=460866]Pompous Magnus[/re]: He may be brain-dead. Tests are inconclusive.

Gopherit November 17, 2009 at 4:24 pm

[re=460882]sati demise[/re]: You are completely forgetting Trent Franks(Nazi) and Jake Flake(Dumbfuck). We have the Cirque du Assclown here in AZ.

slowuncle November 17, 2009 at 4:26 pm

Last night the Liberal Media reported that Grover Norquist was so embarrassed by Republican Weenie-tude about trials for terrorist that he was compelled to speak out in favor of said trials. How messed up is that? Grover-frickin-Norquist reduced to bitch-slapping his fellow Repubs the way General Patton had to smack the sobbing infantryman in the George C Scott movie.

Katydid November 17, 2009 at 4:26 pm

I think Mike should send out engraved invitations to all members of Congress to attend the trial, to watch democracy in action, in honor of the troops. Hilarity will ensue as many Congress critters lose their eagerness to opine, when they have to explain why they’re too afraid to go to NY to watch the proceedings in person.

rafflesinc November 17, 2009 at 4:27 pm

[re=460898]Gopherit[/re]: Haha. Obama stole Napolitano so now you guys have some nut for gov.

comicbookguy November 17, 2009 at 4:28 pm

Yeah we’ll see how smart you are when your plane crashes on a deserted island with a polar bear, underground bunker, and weird French lady on the radio.

JMP November 17, 2009 at 4:31 pm

[re=460883]chascates[/re]: We just have to remember that Muslin Terrorists are the greatest existential threat that the US has ever faced. Greater than the Soviets, the Nazis, the British, or the Confederacy. The one (1) successful attack they’ve made on US soil proves that.

Carl Spakler November 17, 2009 at 4:38 pm

I think the crowd here is on to something…maybe the ‘pubs need to change their logo to the star-spangled chicken

Nerdalicious November 17, 2009 at 4:38 pm

Spreadin’ some Holiday cheer! Sorry I missed the live bloggin’ yesterday. That Katie Couric is such a mean badgerer. I hope everyone is doing very well.
http://bln.gs/b/1ozjwx

engulfedinflames November 17, 2009 at 4:38 pm

I’ve had enough of this bullshit. Fuck him and everyone who’s as fearful as him to infinity.

The very idea that 19 fundamentalist assholes could bring this country to its knees is disheartening to say the least, but it didn’t have to be this way.

Never should have happened, but once it did, to use it politically is treasonous.

NO MORE HATE. NO MORE FEAR.

Suds McKenzie November 17, 2009 at 4:39 pm

24 had a “Black Preznit”; shouldn’t he not watch this out of general principles? a black preznit – oh Hollywood.

MichaelG November 17, 2009 at 4:43 pm

John Shagdog needs to shut the hell up.

PrairiePossum November 17, 2009 at 4:43 pm

Shadegg is a dithering girly man. He is more than happy to send young American men and women to Iraq and Afghanistan so they can have their heads blown off by IEDs, but the thought of having a handful of accused terrorists in an American prison or courtroom makes him wet his pants. He is a disgrace to every veteran who has ever risked his or her life to defend this county.

Mr Blifil November 17, 2009 at 4:43 pm

Surely Bloomberg’s daughters would be out of school by now, no? Wait, he’s not gay?

Toomush Infermashun November 17, 2009 at 4:45 pm

Now, I’m no lawyer (but I’d be happy to play on on TV); still, I think the use of the word “when” instead of “if”, raises the Security Level of Concern by at least two color levels (mauve?). Representative Shagoff (if that is your name), I believe you have issued a veiled threat. What’s the number for Homeland Security?…I think those boys need to escort this crackpot to the Minneapolis Airport Lavatory for some homegrown interrogation…

answerbird November 17, 2009 at 4:48 pm

What a bunch of fucking pussies. I live in New York, let them be tried where the crime was committed. Put them in Rikers in the Aryan Nation wing. Those fuckers would be crying for Gitmo by the end of the week. I am sick of all these goddamn hicks crying about terrorism. We lived through it and moved on.

germansteel November 17, 2009 at 4:49 pm

Just make those terrists sign up for the public option and the death panels will take care of ‘em. See? Problem solved.

Tundra Grifter November 17, 2009 at 4:50 pm

ShadeggDog?

engulfedinflames November 17, 2009 at 4:52 pm

[re=460905]JMP[/re]: And just exactly how did that one attack occur? I’d like some answers and I’d like those responsible held to account. What the fuck happened to this country? shit

user-of-owls November 17, 2009 at 4:55 pm

[re=460918]PrairiePossum[/re]: makes him wet his pants

Everytime these GOP eunuchs hear the word “Muslim” they get the Wahhabi pees.

Rusty Shackleford November 17, 2009 at 4:57 pm

Well, he’s right about one thing: something has run amok. Unfortunately for all of us, it’s those packing peanuts he’s got stored between his ears.

Carl Spakler November 17, 2009 at 4:57 pm

Breaking news…republican party pussy apologizes to NYC Mayor…and I’m not wearing any pants…film at 11

lochnessmonster November 17, 2009 at 4:57 pm

Get OUT! That’s Newt isn’t it? Or do all Republicans look like old white haired, white guys with balding spots?

One Yield Regular November 17, 2009 at 5:09 pm

Now would be a very good time for Rep. Shadegg (and everyone else, for that matter) to read Robert Jackson’s opening remarks to the Nuremberg trials. Sorry – I wasn’t even attempting to be funny. I’ll do better next time.

Georgia Burning November 17, 2009 at 5:10 pm

Grow a pair, Sawedleg or whatever your name is. If you’re really so scared, we’ll bring Sheriff Joe out from Phoenix to put the terr’sts in that pink underwear during the trial. You Arizona guys seem to get turned on by that stuff

KilgoreTrout_XL November 17, 2009 at 5:13 pm

Holy shit that was stupid. And did he just try to scare people with something that sounds really similar to that awful die hard movie where the terrerrist puts that big tube of red syrup in a school and Bruce Willis is an asshole?

user-of-owls November 17, 2009 at 5:20 pm

[re=460967]lochnessmonster[/re]: No, some of them look like smug, mushy-lipped adolescent bully magnets. [see earlier post]

sati demise November 17, 2009 at 5:22 pm

[re=460898]Gopherit[/re]: what is the total ranking now then?

Kyl-asshole
Shaddeg-nut
McCain-panderer
Flake-dumbfuck
Franks-Nazi

thats Arizona!

Ducksworthy November 17, 2009 at 5:25 pm

Dick Cheney buttfucked all these nellie girls into mindless terror when he held them captive in his secret bunker. They’ll never get over it. Ruined for life.

Ducksworthy November 17, 2009 at 5:27 pm

Another chickenhawk showing his true colors

Paul Tardy November 17, 2009 at 5:31 pm

Shouldn’t Arizoonians worry about Mexies not Muzzies.

Got news for you Mexies can whoop Muzzies, seriously Mexico vs Iran 2006 World Cup 3-1 win.

imissopus November 17, 2009 at 5:33 pm

[re=461019]Trot Nixon[/re]: I was thinking The Siege or maybe the fourth Die Hard in which McClane’s daughter gets kidnapped, but Die Hard 3 will do.

Extemporanus November 17, 2009 at 5:54 pm

“…how are you going to feel when it’s your daughter that’s kidnapped at school?”

Does this include homeshools? ‘Cause I have the Duggar’s address if the terrorists are looking for a place to start.

get real November 17, 2009 at 6:14 pm

John Shadegg is – to put it very mildly – a stupid fucking cunt.

bitchincamaro November 17, 2009 at 6:42 pm

[re=460910]Nerdalicious[/re]: Where’ve you been? You didn’t do something stupid, like get a job, did you?

S.Luggo November 17, 2009 at 6:54 pm

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas,
Evvv’reewhere you go.

S.Luggo November 17, 2009 at 6:58 pm

[re=460829]Fox n Fiends[/re]: It’s Swiss. Or I should I say, pussy, neutralist, “Don’t Invade Me, Please, Mister Soldierman” Swiss.

Joey Ratz November 17, 2009 at 7:25 pm

[re=460898]Gopherit[/re]: Ain’t that the truth. Shadegg is “the moderate Republican from Phoenix” (which is acually sorta true, but is says absolutely nothing about Shadegg’s “moderation”) and the recipient of my in-laws’ vote every two years. He’s also so dumb that I doubt he could find his own ass if he searched with both hands, but that still makes him AZ’s brightest Repubcreature.

jillnottumblin November 17, 2009 at 7:27 pm

Shaboom shaboom yada-da da-da-da da-da-da da

political correctness now means irrational blathering and he is right political correctness has run amok.

iwillsavethispatient November 17, 2009 at 7:30 pm

Of course, if he turns out to be right, he will suffer from Shadeggfreude.

/badum-tish

assistant/atlas November 17, 2009 at 8:23 pm

Hey Alan Grayson, there’s another check with your name on it if you call the Republicans “pussies.” Specifically, this guy.

The really crappy thing, though, is that if a Democrat had done something like this, they would have excoriated in the press and by the right-wing noise machine. Why do Republicans get a pass?

[re=461051]Extemporanus[/re]: It’s about time the terrorists attacked Real ‘Merika, instead of New York. Don’t they realize that New Yorkers are chill as fuck about brown people and muslins compared to the rest of America? If I were Osama, I’d be targeting, like, Appalachia or something. No, wait….Texas. I would bomb the fuck out of Texas. Lots of explode-y oil refineries down there, Osama….

EdFlinstone November 17, 2009 at 9:16 pm

Your average wingnut is a bed wetting, panty-waist, fear-junkie and their leaders in congress and talking heads in the media are their dealers. And they call libruls pussies HA HA HA!! If I was running the Dems its a meme I would pushing every fucking day. It would play right into their fear of being teh gay.

Jim Newell November 17, 2009 at 9:25 pm

[re=461144]assistant/atlas[/re]: That was always the central irony of 9/11 for me. The wingnuts freaked the fuck out about New York City getting attacked, but they hate New York City.

George Oscar Bluth November 17, 2009 at 10:20 pm

I’m fairly sure that the mayor of New York has been more affected by terrorism than this dickhole from Bumblefuck, AZ.

Dan M November 17, 2009 at 10:41 pm

Support Shadegg’s Opponent,
visit http://www.hulburdforcongress.com

engulfedinflames November 17, 2009 at 10:53 pm

-[re=461133]iwillsavethispatient[/re]: “badum-tish” great rim-shot!

artpepper November 18, 2009 at 12:22 am

And how are you going to feel when your daughter joins Magneto’s Brotherhood of Evil Mutants, declares war on humanity, fights the X-Men, and finally ends up on the island of Genosha? How will you fell then, huh??

AddHomonym November 18, 2009 at 1:22 am

Shagogmagoggegg!

ez November 18, 2009 at 3:12 am

Shadegg? Hmmmmmmm…sounds ‘Muslim’ to me, time to beat the truth out of this 5th columnist.

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