OH THAT PIPER  5:18 pm November 13, 2009

Hey Look, It’s A Picture Of A Page From ‘Going Rogue’

by Jim Newell

A top secret super secret Wonkette operative has sent us photos of pages 379 and 380 from Going Rogue! Here is the part where Piper Palin kidnaps every liberal reporter in America on her boat and feeds them to the ancient Ice Goblin who lives five nauts upstream. What else is on these two particular pages of bullshit… meh.

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 134 comments }

user-of-owls November 13, 2009 at 5:23 pm

No wonder she got such bad press, she forgot Rule One of PR: Don’t skiff the reporter.

Darkness November 13, 2009 at 5:25 pm

I made it halfway through 379 before suffering nauseous cliché, malicious verb overload and fearing for my brain, had to stop. That kind of writing is like breathing formaldehyde: your nose goes numb, then your brain, then you cease to realize you are being slowly poisoned.

ella November 13, 2009 at 5:25 pm

Bring on the mosquitoes and horseflies, the wind and the driving rain!

I’m just sick I wasn’t in Wasilla for that.

S.Luggo November 13, 2009 at 5:26 pm

“And just after we turned our backs, Piper got pregnant.”

azw88 November 13, 2009 at 5:26 pm

“… no money grab…” WTF was this book deal and this obscene speaking fees all about then??

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 5:27 pm

Who is it wrote this…or must we rely on computer forensic “stylistics” to say “Sarah”?

germansteel November 13, 2009 at 5:27 pm

Oh, that Sarah and her family. They are soooo much smarter and better than all those snobs from the lower 48. They can catch fish, and drive boats and all that really special, unique and just, you know “real American” stuff.

Have you ever seen anybody more fucking full of herself?

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 5:31 pm

TL;DR

(“L” stands for Lower Level, Lack Lustre, Last, Least, Limp, Love, Lousy, Lame, Latent, Lethargic, Lazy, Lemon, Little Logic, Lucky, Leech, Liver Lipped, Laborious Louse on a Loser’s Lips, Live in Limbo, Lyrical Lapse, Low Life…)

badmuthagoose November 13, 2009 at 5:32 pm

[re=458326]germansteel[/re]: No.

V572625694 November 13, 2009 at 5:32 pm

“Secretly I must admit that I really wanted to see the likes of Andrea Mitchell…” Is that what they’re calling it now?

Words November 13, 2009 at 5:32 pm

It’s depressing to think of how many trees had to die to make the 2 million books she’ll probably sell to mindless, tasteless boobs.

Click November 13, 2009 at 5:33 pm

[re=458326]germansteel[/re]: Easy there stud, after all, operating a fishing skiff demands FAR more skill than your standard Chris Craft.

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 5:33 pm

So Feinstein and Albright walk into a REI…

V572625694 November 13, 2009 at 5:36 pm

God damn those two pages are full of infuriating bullshit: “I always love introducing reporters to our…subsistence lifestyles…” Yeah sure, subsistence on oil pipeline and government jobs and federal military pork, but you go out on the weekends and stab some salmon and kill some moose and believe you’re living a “subsistence lifestyle” because your meat didn’t stop at Safeway on its way to your table. Snowbilly: hypocrite or ignorant slut?

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 5:36 pm

[re=458330]Extemporanus[/re]: I’m a liar and a retard.

I read the whole damn thing, including the “‘B’ in FBI stands for ‘Buzzkill’” part which I Triggedly forgot to quote in my comment.

Also, “skiffing”? Is that like yiffing for scalies?

SmilingMightyJesus November 13, 2009 at 5:37 pm

“Grab a Piper on the way”. Does that have something to do with a bong?

hockeymom November 13, 2009 at 5:39 pm

Even the font looks stupid.

Suds McKenzie November 13, 2009 at 5:39 pm

This is obviously a work of fiction. No one would EVER “want to see Andrea Mitchell” anywhere.

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 5:39 pm

[re=458339]SmilingMightyJesus[/re]: I believe that it’s a variant of the phrase “lay some pipe”.

SayItWithWookies November 13, 2009 at 5:39 pm

I had a satellite phone for state communications during my annual two days away from the office…

Oh, she only left the office for two days a year? No wonder she quit early — she’d done her four years already — like those kids who graduate high school in three years. We all owe that hard-working woman an apology for belittling her abilities.

chascates November 13, 2009 at 5:39 pm

Piper is the only one of the family I like. She’s the one who takes care of Precious Little Angel Special Needs Baby, she can operate watercraft, I’m betting she’s close to her pilot’s license (‘Piper’, dig?), and she can probably shoot, gut, and skin a moose or caribou quicker than you can say ‘look at my children and see how special I am!

iwillsavethispatient November 13, 2009 at 5:41 pm

Longest. ReCAPTCHA. Ever!

Click November 13, 2009 at 5:41 pm

“Secretly, I must admit….”
Head meet wall.

RoscoePColtraine November 13, 2009 at 5:42 pm

[re=458337]V572625694[/re]:
Snowbilly: hypocrite or ignorant slut?

Both, my dear. Sarah teaches us that one can be both.

Georgia Burning November 13, 2009 at 5:42 pm

Let me guess- the State of Alaska had to foot the $12,456 bill for boat rental with Piper as the $50 an hour captain.

gurukalehuru November 13, 2009 at 5:44 pm

I loved the completely unironic use of the word “slaying.” Bring on the horseflies.

Oldskool November 13, 2009 at 5:45 pm

“I had a satellit phone for state communications during my annual two days away from the office…”

Yeah, we believe that, Sayruh. Two days, uh-huh.

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 5:48 pm

[re=458341]hockeymom[/re]: When printing in crayon, one’s typographic options are limited.

[re=458345]chascates[/re]: Don’t step to Piper—she means fucking business.

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 5:50 pm

[re=458348]Click[/re]: [re=458347]iwillsavethispatient[/re]: Thank you mates!

AutomaticPilot November 13, 2009 at 5:51 pm

[re=458339]SmilingMightyJesus[/re]: isn’t that what A-Rod said?

Berkeley Bear November 13, 2009 at 5:51 pm

I think this book should come with a warning label or a 2 drink minimum. Two pages of it and I feel significantly stupider than I did just a minute ago. And whiplashed, too – we’re such normal people salmon killing folks except that we go to A-list parties in DC? And shamelessly namedrop Dianne Feinstein, John McCain and Alan Greenspan in the same paragraph as extolling hip waders? Huh? You have to be schizophrenic just to make sense of this garbage.

Good, news though – it will absolutely keep her idiot herd of followers occupied for the next 6 months to a year trying to read it and get its special hidden meanings just for them (wink).

Click November 13, 2009 at 5:51 pm

“the ancient Ice Goblin who lives five nauts upstream.”
I forget me nauts – how far is that exactly?

Fly Over Girl November 13, 2009 at 5:51 pm

[re=458324]Sleeves[/re]: Well, I guess we can thank Lynn Vincent, who wrote Donkey Cons: Sex, Crime, and Corruption in the Democratic Party, to thank for the ghost writing and repeated use of “Sarah.”

Jerri November 13, 2009 at 5:53 pm

Going Rogue with the truth there, Sarah? She’s pretty haughty and self-righteous for someone dumber than a box of hair.

Also: “slaying salmon?” Sounds filthy. Like, homo doin’ it, filthy.

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 5:53 pm

[re=458365]Click[/re]: It’s naut far.

bitchincamaro November 13, 2009 at 5:54 pm

[re=458337]V572625694[/re]: Yes.

shadowMark November 13, 2009 at 5:56 pm

Yeah. My generation had J. D. Salinger and his one novel. The kids nowadays have Sarah Palin and her one autobiography.

Of course, the kids nowadays in addition to Palin’s one autobiography also get Sarah herself on a book tour and on Oprah and in leaked pages and, probably, up-coming magazine spreads.

Damn it. All my generation got in addition to Salinger’s one novel was “Nine Stories,” “Franny and Zooey” and “Raise High the Roof Beam, Carpenters and Seymour: An Introduction.”

Damn punk kids nowadays walking around all emo in their scarves. They’ve got everything.

JooJoo Bee November 13, 2009 at 5:56 pm

So Sarah has all these super-good friends inside the beltway now. That must mean she isn’t a rogue anymore. So, okay, I think “BRING ON THE HORSEFLIES” should be Sarah’s 2012 slogan. Imagine the fun we could have with that, pile-of-shit-wise.

Berkeley Bear November 13, 2009 at 5:57 pm

[re=458360]Extemporanus[/re]: That is some serious mean face on little cub there. Did she see David Letterman in the crowd or what?

If she really is on the Drew Barrymore path to Hell, Piper (plus Bristol’s continuing idiocy) would be the greatest sideshow for a Presidential Primary ever. Even better than Billy Carter or Roger Clinton.

Click November 13, 2009 at 5:59 pm

This page so fucking sucks ass it’s going to give every GOPer on the hill a hard-on.

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 6:01 pm

Hey Jim, are parts of the pages blurry because Mark Halperin jizzed on them the other day?

Robophobia November 13, 2009 at 6:01 pm

Skiffing is very difficult, even though a 3rd grader could do it, especially when the tide changes every 10 minutes.

user-of-owls November 13, 2009 at 6:07 pm

[re=458365]Click[/re]: [re=458368]Extemporanus[/re]: It’s around a few cubits, or furlongs, or whatnaut.

Guppy06 November 13, 2009 at 6:10 pm

I never knew shopping at the Wasilla Wal-Mart was “subsistence living.”

Was the airplane she flew around in fueled by rendered animal fat?

Click November 13, 2009 at 6:10 pm

[re=458379]Robophobia[/re]: It’s all those Moonies exerting their gravitational force.

shadowMark November 13, 2009 at 6:22 pm

Fishing? Heck, didn’t Adlai Stevenson take reporters bow-hunting for carp in the Chicago River?

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 6:22 pm

[re=458366]Fly Over Girl[/re]: Ah, thanks. This book will succumb to one of the DOE stallions of USENET, her Fujitsu ScanSnap and her karate CHOP.

Robophobia November 13, 2009 at 6:24 pm

[re=458360]Extemporanus[/re]: [re=458345]chascates[/re]: I guess the little skiff didn’t drift far from mothership.

Buttery1000 November 13, 2009 at 6:26 pm

Looks like it says “a better sense of our state’s . . . anal” or “acid.” Guess I had no idea Eskimos were into such things, but I imagine you gotta keep yourself warm and entertained in Alaska somehow.

Naked Bunny with a Whip November 13, 2009 at 6:28 pm

Waitaminute, is she talking about Alaska or Ethiopia?

Snarkalicious November 13, 2009 at 6:33 pm

[re=458343]Extemporanus[/re]: Close. A ‘Piper’ is the one who does the laying. Clearly, this is a reference to Sarah boning Levi on the side.

Click November 13, 2009 at 6:33 pm

[re=458399]shadowMark[/re]: Even more inventive, back in 1899 mayor Harrison had his men set the Chicago River on fire and just had reporters bring frying pans.

user-of-owls November 13, 2009 at 6:36 pm

She’s bragging that her state has a subsistence lifestyle?

“We here in Alaska beam with pride over the fact that our residents, like noble Haitians, Sudanese and Cambodians, have a vibrant hunter-gatherer economy.”

BlueStateLibtard November 13, 2009 at 6:37 pm

The first sentence sounds like it was liberally lifted from an Alaskan tourism brochure. I’m sure there’s lot more yawn-inducing hyperbole to come, yawn.

mirrorball November 13, 2009 at 6:39 pm

Couldn’t she find a better ghost writer? Or maybe she really did write it all herself.

geminisunmars November 13, 2009 at 6:40 pm

[re=458360]Extemporanus[/re]: That is an awesome photo. Were you able to scan it from an advanced copy of her book?

But really, I was so taken with that photo. I wonder where she learned that sweet little gesture. Ahhh, family values.

WendyK November 13, 2009 at 6:43 pm

What the hell kind of country is this that this woman was even a nominee for anything? It’s all well and good to snark on her and make fun of the fact that she’s a moron snowbilly but shit, there came a point when this stopped being funny and started being scary. I used to enjoy mocking her but lately all I feel is anxiety. How the FUCK did this do-nothing know-nothing woman and grandpa get so many millions of votes?

Scoops McGee November 13, 2009 at 6:43 pm

Well, The Wonket spoils everything again! Now everybody knows the Palin Family Annual Christmas Newsletter!

geminisunmars November 13, 2009 at 6:50 pm

[re=458360]Extemporanus[/re]: I mean it. Thank you.

shadowMark November 13, 2009 at 6:57 pm

[re=458427]geminisunmars[/re]: You’re going to be haunted now, aren’t you? By the intensity of the hatred on that little girl’s face. It’s like a real life horror movie isn’t it? And it’s going to haunt you now. Happy Friday the 13th!

(AND that family might be in the White House soon! Happy Friday the 13th!)

Servo November 13, 2009 at 6:59 pm

I wonder how many times she wrote “our country is at a crossroads”.

V572625694 November 13, 2009 at 7:04 pm

[re=458371]shadowMark[/re]: Didn’t our generation have Richard Farinya (can’t make a tilde over the “n” on this thing) and Thomas Pynchon too? Salinger’s preppie angst (I know, he was hardly a preppy) is too Wes Anderson for me. Or maybe Wes Anderson is too Holden Caulfield or John Knowles.

Don’t care for preppies, as may be clear.

V572625694 November 13, 2009 at 7:06 pm

[re=458438]V572625694[/re]:There it is: ñññññ

Fly Over Girl November 13, 2009 at 7:08 pm

[re=458366]Fly Over Girl[/re]: Damn, it’s like I speak Elvish or something. My bad.

MarSF November 13, 2009 at 7:09 pm

[re=458421]WendyK[/re]: We are a land of “Morans”.

Today we have David Brooks taking “President” Thune out for a “test ride” in his column. And Brooks is supposed to be a “thinker”.

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 7:12 pm

[re=458445]Fly Over Girl[/re]: It’s like we all do (when we’re drunk).

chascates November 13, 2009 at 7:12 pm

[re=458360]Extemporanus[/re]: I withdraw my made-up admiration for Palin #4. I guess you can’t make a silk purse out of a moose turd.

Berkeley Bear November 13, 2009 at 7:14 pm

[re=458446]MarSF[/re]: Beat me to it. It was Bill Kristol and other pundits who went on an RNC cruise to Alaska and decided Snowbilly was the future of the party, the way Brooksie is now trying to anoint Thune. What is it with the GOP and state leaders with a whopping 3 electoral votes?

Fly Over Girl November 13, 2009 at 7:21 pm

[re=458449]Sleeves[/re]: And that’s a total bummer. I might still be hung over from Wednesday night, but Friday evening’s drinking has yet to begin. Soon. Very, very soon.

geminisunmars November 13, 2009 at 7:25 pm

[re=458433]shadowMark[/re]: nnnnooooooooooooo!!11!!!1

(oh shit,I just puked splitpea soup on my ballot).

QueenOfTheDamned November 13, 2009 at 7:25 pm

Shit, I was going to wait to kill myself until we were all forced to face Wasilla and pray seven times a day. But I can no longer live in a world where pages of that self-indulgent tripe are going to spend weeks on the best-seller list. It reads like the diary of an eighth-grade mean girl.

Off to drive a steel spike through my head and/or scratch out my own eyes. If I can make it to the toolshed before I go insane.

MarSF November 13, 2009 at 7:28 pm

[re=458454]Berkeley Bear[/re]: If Thune and Palin are the best the GOP has to offer as far as “looks and charisma”, the GOP will keep failing.

Palin appears to be morphing into Liddy Dole at warp speed. I think she borrowed a wig from her for the Oprah Show.

GeneralLerong November 13, 2009 at 7:33 pm

[re=458421]WendyK[/re]: Not to mention the millions of dollars. The book advance, that trust fund that PaulTardy is always reminding us about…

Paul Tardy November 13, 2009 at 7:36 pm

“guests such as Dick Cheney, … , and my friend John McCain”

So Cheney, Greenspan, and the rest aren’t her friends? Maybe there are a few interesting bits in the book.

rocktonsammy November 13, 2009 at 7:37 pm

YAY PIPER!!!!!!

Shes the Merel Osmond of the Snowbilly Bunch.

rocktonsammy November 13, 2009 at 7:39 pm

[re=458364]Berkeley Bear[/re]:
YOU BETCHA-

skutre November 13, 2009 at 7:43 pm

Repost: OMG, I just heard on Pacifica Radio that Going Rogue is British slang for unprotected anal sex.

Here’s the mp3 52 seconds
http://acksisofevil.org/audio/goingrogue.mp3

-scooter in Houston

President Beeblebrox November 13, 2009 at 7:56 pm

ArghlebarglesalmonPipernatives.

In the words of Lloyd Bridges in “Airplane!”, looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.

Neilist November 13, 2009 at 7:58 pm

I can imagine myself doing many things. Many, many things.

But I cannot imagine myself ever reading this “book.” Even if there was nothing else in the entire Universe to read.

smartypants November 13, 2009 at 7:59 pm

[re=458459]QueenOfTheDamned[/re]: Like your avatar. Don’t go just yet. It’s bound to get worse.

Neilist November 13, 2009 at 8:03 pm

[re=458371]shadowMark[/re]: Goddamnit, you bastard. You just reminded me of what I felt like when I read “Franny & Zooey” and “Raise High,” etc. for first time.

Back when there was . . . hope.

:::Sniff:::

I HATE YOU.

comicbookguy November 13, 2009 at 8:09 pm

Wait for the movie: Nailin’ Palin IV: Going Rogue in Alaska Bush Country

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 8:15 pm

[re=458427]geminisunmars[/re]: You and your adorable new little avatard are ever so welcome.

(And should you ever want to print it out and hang it, say, above your bed or something, here’s a larger version.)/b>

[re=458451]chascates[/re]: I dunno, I think Palin #2 probably could.

Jukesgrrl November 13, 2009 at 8:17 pm

She loves introducing reporters to remote areas of Alaska. Too bad she didn’t love introducing remote areas of Alaska to social services and basic energy resources.

[re=458337]V572625694[/re]: “Snowbilly: hypocrite or ignorant slut?”
Why not both? Carrie Prejean’s got it down to a science and she’s only been around for a year.

[re=458435]Servo[/re]: Someone set up her Word program with a search and replace. Every time she types the letter “C,” her computer automatically puts in “our country is at a crossroads.” The whole book was probably written that way. Word salad, indeed.

TVarmy November 13, 2009 at 8:18 pm

This reminds me of the time I tried to interview Olympia Snowe about what she thinks of the public option, but she ended up teaching me about a thing called curling. Then she held me hostage in her car while she went across the border to Canada to make some cash on an exchange rate scam she has going.

Apparently, if you buy something in an American Target and then refund it to the same credit card in Canada, you get about 5% extra because of the exchange rate. Unfortunately, she did it on my card, and now Target’s acting like it’s an error I’m obligated to pay for. She’s now blocking all her mail because of Erick Erickson, so now I can’t reach her.

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 8:24 pm

[re=458470]skutre[/re]: Slang is difficult to avoid. Just today, I nearly reported myself well and “knoshed” by a gnawing baby, until the computer advised against knosh (q.v. Urban Dictionary).

Went with “chomped” and “Roamin’ Chompsky”.

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 8:33 pm

[re=458457]Fly Over Girl[/re]: (Well, I hadn’t noticed until you gave notice, and that tells for me.)

S.Luggo November 13, 2009 at 8:40 pm

[re=458333]Words[/re]: Hippie. Trees are carbon dioxide vampires.

ForTheTurnstiles November 13, 2009 at 8:44 pm

[re=458470]skutre[/re]: I gotta find a good English girl.

S.Luggo November 13, 2009 at 8:59 pm

Each “Going Rogue” should come with its own recycling bin.

ForTheTurnstiles November 13, 2009 at 9:05 pm

[re=458505]S.Luggo[/re]: You can surely ditch the copy you’ll get for Christmas from my sister on Gipperslist. It has to be good for something…

http://www.gipperslist.com

Scooter November 13, 2009 at 9:13 pm

The ipecac industry will collapse within the month.

Robophobia November 13, 2009 at 9:17 pm

[re=458487]Extemporanus[/re]: Ya know, kids doo-doo the funniest things.

kappakid November 13, 2009 at 9:43 pm

Heh, “slaying salmon.” Is that what Levi called it?

S.Luggo November 13, 2009 at 9:53 pm

[re=458506]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]:
If I got “Going Rouge” for Xmas, it would for shredding into a cat box. (Pity the cat‘s hemorrhoids.) Knowing my family, no subsequent re-gifting would be possible. Each member has an Xmas-gift photographic memory. Pricks.
PS: No haz cat.

SnarkyMark November 13, 2009 at 10:43 pm

In all seriousness, what I don’t understand is: If it was “about Alaska” that she resigned, what “about America” as she is thinking about running in ’12? Why won’t she do us all the favor she did Alaska and leave us alone?

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 10:57 pm

[re=458506]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: Don’t you mean GipperSlut?

[re=458509]Robophobia[/re]: Meconium, su conium ese!

[re=458330]Extemporanus[/re]: Kool Moe Dee has a beef with this entire thread.

I hope you’re all happy.

Click November 13, 2009 at 11:29 pm

[re=458552]Extemporanus[/re]: I don’t find a word of your comment to be understandable – except “meconmomium” which of course means “an infant’s first stool.”

Mr Blifil November 13, 2009 at 11:30 pm

I was going to add a pithy observation, but I decided to quit instead.

Flanders November 13, 2009 at 11:37 pm

[re=458487]Extemporanus[/re]: I like the lady gazing down benevolently on little Piper while she drops the flip-off sign.

DDD November 13, 2009 at 11:39 pm

Interesting self-aggrandizing and delusional use of present tense: “I always LOVE introducing reporters…”

That’s LOVED, isn’t it, really?

AnSnarkist November 13, 2009 at 11:42 pm

Is vastness the way Sarah Palin abbreviate vast emptiness? That would make more sense.

SpikeyDog November 13, 2009 at 11:42 pm

I just know that the coloring book will be much more intelligently done than this waste of trees.

Sleeves November 13, 2009 at 11:46 pm

[re=458549]SnarkyMark[/re]: About Palin running in `12: I’m thinking what I thought after CNN told me to think that G.W. Bush had just won the “fuzzy math” debate in 2000. If so, we have this coming. “This…chap…will destroy the Grand Old Party.”

I believe I went mad, politically, right then and there.

Fly Over Girl November 13, 2009 at 11:50 pm

[re=458497]Sleeves[/re]: I’m drunk enough now. All isssz well. Wine is good! Palin = slut.

Terry November 14, 2009 at 12:26 am

Too bad Palin did pretty much squat for Alaska Natives while she was governor. People lacked food and heating oil on the Yukon River delta last winter and she sent Billy Graham’s charity out there rather than, uh, sending food and heating oil.

SnarkNotFark November 14, 2009 at 12:54 am

From these two pages it is obvious to me that James Joyce and William Faulkner were retarded morans.

Stately, plump Buck Mulligan my ass. This book is fucking golden

LowerdPeninsula November 14, 2009 at 1:57 am

[re=458570]Flanders[/re]: That’s Sarah’s mother.

If that pic is photoshopped, it’s a damned good job.

Sleeves November 14, 2009 at 2:10 am

[re=458579]Fly Over Girl[/re]: :) Ah, glorious! Palin = Mommy Dearest

Robophobia November 14, 2009 at 2:23 am

[re=458613]LowerdPeninsula[/re]:Hey man, I was just goofin’ around last night. I meant to refer to a Detroit Earthquake — if you know what I mean.
Then I found this little oddity, not as strange as Peter Griffin’s Volcano Insurance, but funny nonetheless:

http://quotes.usinsuranceonline.com/index.php?wsc=1&adv=3&pt=3109&kw=michigan+earthquake+insurance&tk=b3ZlcnR1cmUsMTUwOTk1MzM1NyxpbnN1cmFuY2UsbWljaGlnYW5fZWFydGhxdWFrZV9pbnN1cmFuY2UsbWljaGlnYW4gZWFydGhxdWFrZSBpbnN1cmFuY2U%253d&prod=Free+Michigan+Earthquake+Insurance+Quotes&ysmwa=WzQFTeHuzeqUjfBj6mRKAYmG81iKvMmPj9rBCpyCvusJJlPgOn1gh7nHuHeukGSy&usck=1

Marlowe November 14, 2009 at 2:26 am

I’m surprised my fellow wonketteers missed this gem from page 380:
“Now I wanted to see Andrea and her colleagues sporting fish-slimed waders, BANGING around in a skiff…”

If this is what Sarah wanted to see, I now understand why Bristol and Levi banged around.

schvitzatura November 14, 2009 at 2:33 am

A lot of holes in the tundra, and a lot of problems are buried in those holes…

cashaholic November 14, 2009 at 2:44 am

“Todd and I had been single-income and dual-income…” Hey, just like Bill and Melinda Gates!

artbot2000 November 14, 2009 at 3:26 am

So what does all this national geographic shit have to do with going commando? It begins to sound like she’s saving the goods for the sequel, and all those color photos are just worthless landscapes and family snaps.

desertwind November 14, 2009 at 4:32 am

The sincerity just drips off the page, doesn’t it?

Fly Over Girl November 14, 2009 at 8:53 am

Just for our little Trig.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33909607/ns/politics/

[re=458616]Sleeves[/re]: And owww. Hangovers suck.

comicbookguy November 14, 2009 at 9:49 am

That is truly the most substantive policy book I ever read on the subject of hip-waders.

stink, but November 14, 2009 at 10:03 am

“We’d grab Piper on the way so she could teach a couple of them how to drive the boat – and she did.” ~ Ernest Hemingway

Sleeves November 14, 2009 at 10:11 am

[re=458647]Fly Over Girl[/re]: Ice-cold black-cherry or strawberry banana yogurt. (Oh, hope it’s not the Associated Presse? For that Shall pass swiftly as a gallstone. Look for Murphy’s sign.)

Click November 14, 2009 at 11:02 am

[re=458565]Click[/re]: Oh – so it’s THAT kind of stool.

Fly Over Girl November 14, 2009 at 11:32 am

[re=458661]Sleeves[/re]: Ha. It’s all in the headache. Thankfully no heaves or abdominal pain. Two cups of java and a cranberry-orange muffin have taken the edge off, but not provided a real cure.

Too bad I’m stuck at work. Otherwise, I’d just sleep it off. Of course, if I didn’t have to work on a weekend … perhaps I wouldn’t drink.

Nah, Palin will always make me over imbibe.

HuddledMass November 14, 2009 at 1:06 pm

[re=458506]ForTheTurnstiles[/re]: The gipperslist site sells “homeschooling curriculums”(sic) — which apparently does not include teaching the correct plural of that word, which is “curricula.”

Click November 14, 2009 at 1:24 pm

[re=458613]LowerdPeninsula[/re]: She plays a mean game of ‘smell my finger.’

Click November 14, 2009 at 1:27 pm

[re=458527]kappakid[/re]: He loves to snag for those humpies.

Atlas Spanked November 14, 2009 at 2:12 pm

Translation: “I quit my job for Alaska.” Amazing. This bimbo lives on Lake Wasilla, 5 minutes or less from a massive, two-mile long strip mall of big box auto dealerships, grocery, hardware, building, and liquor stores, but she paints herself as a wilderness hunter-gatherer. Her ‘set net site’ in Dillingham (a 3-hour plane ride from Wasilla, and a very expensive one)is just the snowbilly version of a 5,000 sq. foot cottage in the Hamptons.

Unfortunately, this is how most throttle-twisting urban Alaskans view themselves. The chauvinism must be witnessed to be believed. In a state full of obese, cigarette smoking alcoholic black-heli gun freaks, all too many see “outsiders” as metrosexual poodles. I’ve never seen a state with fewer people, but more “Trespassers will be shot” signs, and “UN-free” plywood/blue tarp hovels.

Personally, I hope Alaska does secede. They’d be an economic colony of Russia, China, Japan or Korea within ten years. After all, someone has to provide a federal source for 30% of the state’s paychecks. Even Palin’s coming to the Lower 48 for her cash flow.

Click November 14, 2009 at 2:22 pm

[re=458703]Atlas Spanked[/re]: Excellent description, except you forgot to mention those single-wides with the spray foam insulation blasted all around the outside like a metastisizing tumor or giant-sized piece of delectable seafoam.

TVarmy November 14, 2009 at 2:42 pm

Hey Sarah! Maybe families would have more money if you legalized polygamy! Instead of single or dual income, imagine tripple income!

BTW, I’m shipping Sarah, Todd, and Katie Couric. Just because it’d cheer her up.

foulmouthed mrscreant November 14, 2009 at 4:48 pm

I was hoping to see gay porn with this title. Very disappointing, on many, many levels.

Yoko Ono November 14, 2009 at 6:34 pm

Ya know how historians still discuss lebensraum 90 years after it was penned? Let’s just hope 90 years from now no one is talking about skiffs.

Also, you all know that John and the boys were weaned on Skiffle, right? In this mumbo-jumbo, would it have mattered if she said her and Todd skiffled? Then we all could have a bump in our Q-ratings.

Smoke Filled Roommate November 14, 2009 at 10:33 pm

“…and then Piper began speaking Inuit. Their name for her is ‘Peepoo Matardajutwat’. I don’t understand Inuit. I usually just have H&R block do my taxes, just like any other normally rogue Alaskan person.”

MISTAHCOUGHDROP November 15, 2009 at 9:24 am
Click November 15, 2009 at 12:53 pm

[re=458565]Click[/re]: Uh – “meconmomium”??? Shit.

fifitrixiebelle November 15, 2009 at 6:17 pm

Harper Collins have threatened palingates a small blog dedicated to investigating Sarah Palin because they have been posting excerpts from Goig Rogue. I guess they don’t like it if bloggers go rogue on them!

http://palingates.blogspot.com/2009/11/palingates-hit-nerve-letter-from-harper.html

ruffian518 November 20, 2009 at 4:50 pm

http://www.facebook.com/notes/yvonne-coffey/sarah-palin-seems-to-have-almost-all-these-symtoms/180928831309 This is Sarah Palin in every sense of the word.I looked up many things and this is it.NPD

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