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Tom Tancredo To Be Next Governor Of Colorado

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Gross: “Former U.S. Rep. Tom Tancredo appears to be inching closer to getting into the Colorado gubernatorial race. While he has yet to formally declare his candidacy or fill out paperwork with the secretary of state’s office, the Littleton Republican on Thursday told a Westword reporter he ‘fully intends to run.'” Watch his first “spot” above! [Denver Post]

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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

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  • ManchuCandidate

    Yes, cause immigration is the State’s responsibility not the Federal Gubbiment.

    His opponents should role out: “Tom Tancredo: Too sad for Vietnam. Too crazy for Colorado.”

  • comicbookguy

    Does this mean Colorado is going to finally close it’s borders? About flippin time!

  • Click

    I couldn’t make out whether the voice-over said dead “muggers” or dead “mothers.” Until I know, I won’t be casting my vote.

  • Judas Peckerwood

    Oh, that “hope” message is soooo passe.

  • Click

    Oh – and he left out the part where the dirty messicans can cause parents to perform eleborate charades wherein they pretend their half-breed kid took off in a gigantic mylar balloon.

  • ph7

    Now we get to watch the Teabagging strategy bite the GOP in the ass. Win those primaries, wingnuts!

  • Gopherit

    Yes, because a Governor can do all that.

  • Mahousu

    I’m not going to watch the video, so I assume “Pushing Drugs. Raping Kids. Destroying Lives.” is his platform.

    And here people were saying Republicans don’t stand for anything any more.

  • Gopherit

    Pushing Drugs. Raping Kids. Destroying Lives.

    We’re the GOP.

  • SmutBoffin

    Tom Tancredo is a dumbfuck shotglassful of diarrhea…because someone needs to say it.

  • JMP

    Because no drug dealers or kiddie rapists are natural-born citizens, yep. At least he’ll keep the imaginary Colorado-Mexico border safe!

  • Decker

    All Tancredo’s opponents need to do is declare “War on Immigration” and watch Tancredo dodge the draft election.

  • AxmxZ

    Sheriff murdered, crops burned, stores looted, people stampeded, and cattle raped.

  • slappypaddy

    okay, what i see here is a screenshot that appears to indicate our country is being invaded by three young black people, a park ranger, and a shadowy figure i can’t quite make out, who are allegedly pushing drugs and raping kids and destroying lives. who let these people in? can farmer tom save us from them? can we pay him in hobo beans?

  • V572625694

    He’s tough all right, except when Markos Moulitsas is around. Then he tears off his microphone and flees like a little girl.

    Deciding who can and can’t come into the country is one of the things governments of nations can legitimately do. Douche bags like Tancredo make it seem wrong. Yuck. Littleton Colorado, dreary suburban slum of sprawl. Ew.

  • bitchincamaro

    [re=458006]Mahousu[/re]: & [re=458007]Gopherit[/re]: Copyright!

  • One Yield Regular

    This is a golden opportunity for Dave Schultheis to come out of retirement and join Tom as Lt. Governor. They’d make such a cute couple.

  • ithasatilde

    The problem here is not the imaginary Colorado-Mexico border he wants to defend, but the imaginary USA-Honduras border that Tancredo is pushing to up the security on here.

    This ad looks like Tancredo watched the video where Jimmy O’Keefe tried to smuggle Salvadorian prostitutes through the Guyana-ACORN border and a broken lightbulb swimming in a river of Jameson went off in his head:

    “I bet those people that only started hating Mexico when it became cool don’t even KNOW Central America is a country!”

    Props for thinking outside the racism box, I guess.

  • bjkeefe

    Dobbs/Tancredo 2012!

  • engulfedinflames

    Some things never change.

  • Georgia Burning

    [re=457994]Click[/re]: Those folks were from California. Actually, Tancredo would do better to rail on Texans and Californians moving into Colorado, unless he has a new source for hotel maids in Vail and Aspen.

  • Don’t Mess with Joe

    Since Colorado is one of those big square states, building The Fence should be a breeze for this jackass.

  • WadISay

    Hmm, an anagram of “Tancredo” is “taco endr”.

  • geminisunmars

    [re=457988]ManchuCandidate[/re]:” Too crazy for Colorado.” Sorry, not so.

    Well, Colorado does border New Mexico, so we need to keep them New Messicans out. Too.

  • Jim Demintia

    What an incredible shithead.

  • SayItWithWookies

    From his Wikipedia entry:

    In July, when Tancredo proposed that America respond to any future terrorist attack by bombing Mecca and other holy sites, John Podhoretz, writing on the National Review’s website, said: “Tom Tancredo is an idiot.”

    Tom Tancredo: Not even sensible enough for other right-wing fanatics.

  • engulfedinflames

    Tancredo? Tancredo?

    what kind of name is that? Oh ya, it’s Native American for “heap big smoke no fire”.

  • Extemporanus

    [re=458006]Mahousu[/re]: [re=458007]Gopherit[/re]: It’s known as the “Tan Credo”:

    Phase 1: Push drugs
    Phase 2: Rape kids
    Phase 3: Profit!

  • shortsshortsshorts

    [re=458007]Gopherit[/re]: Destroying Kids, Pushing Lives, Raping Drugs.

    We’re really off message here.

  • Click

    [re=458058]Extemporanus[/re]: “Tan credo?” David Brooks lives by it, or at least he wishes he did. Someday Thune.

  • hillarys_left_nut

    Denver Post scooped by Westword again? (the Washington equivalent would be a WaPo reporter forced to make this attribution: “…as Marion Barry told a CityPaper reporter on Thursday…”)

  • Mickey7

    Never underestimate the stupid in this country. My sister lived in Albuquerque for a while and more than once she had mail returned ‘postage due’ for it being international, originating as it had in New ‘Mexico.’ This was the work of US postal employees in contiguous 48. Given the geographic ignorance of the majority of Americans, there’s just no telling if the average Coloradoan even knows they aren’t a border state.

  • Redhead

    You know, it’s SO refreshing, in this current half-breed Muslin nazi-communist-socialist teabagging environment, to see someone just come on out and proudly declare his racism, instead of denying the obvious elephant in the room.

  • AbstinenceOnly Ed

    No snark here; just run. Tancredo is pure satanic bile, like Joe Lieberman after a some spoiled milk.

  • S.Luggo

    From WMGH-TV:
    — If elected, Tancredo said he would reduce government spending and cut taxes.
    McInnis said those are also his goals. —
    This will be a campaign of contrasts.

  • AddHomonym

    McInnis v. Tancredo! Talk about yer Super Bowl of Retardation! That’s what ya got right there.

  • DP

    [re=458009]SmutBoffin[/re]: Perfect…though perhaps a larger vessel than a shotglass is needed to hold the full volume of his TomTancreedaria…maybe a 55 gallon drum. Galvanized, of course.

  • chascates

    Sources: Lou Dobbs Prepping Possible Presidential Run

    Dobbs & Tancredo will be a perfect 3rd (or 4th or 5th) party candidate!

    Joining Huckabee/Romney and Ron Paul/Joe the Plumber

  • Bruno

    No Americans would ever rape a kid or push drugs. Goddamn foreigns.

  • kewlguy42069

    Isn’t the rate of violent crime rate higher among citizens? If so, lol

  • lochnessmonster

    Well Tom…why don’t you go back where YOU came from? The white man stole this land from the indigenous peoples…Including the Mexicans…

  • AbstinenceOnly Ed

    [re=458222]chascates[/re]: I’ms still holding out for an all ___ the ____ ticket. Joe the Plumber? Larry the Cable Guy? Carrie the Pageant Whore? Republicans love themselves some blankety blank.

  • vitamins taken helmet on

    [re=458027]V572625694[/re]: Littleton CO = Meth Prairie

  • rocktonsammy

    Colorado has coloreds?

  • Click

    [re=458357]lochnessmonster[/re]: The historical record has a funny way of beginning where you want it to. The Native American tribes spent years killing the fuck out of each other in their desire to inhabit and defend the best places to get steak.

  • LowerdPeninsula

    [re=457988]ManchuCandidate[/re]: “His opponents should role out: “Tom Tancredo: Too sad for Vietnam. Too crazy for Colorado.”


    He should really just re-run for president. In a perfect world, though, he’d be at Guantanamo, or some assorted US-sanctioned gulag.

  • bullship

    I’m confused. I thought the Republican party WAS the party of rape. How will I ever keep track.

  • bullship

    I’m confused. I thought the Republican party WAS the party of rape. How will I ever keep track. Perhaps this will help.

    Alexander (R-TN)
    Barrasso (R-WY)
    Bond (R-MO)
    Brownback (R-KS)
    Bunning (R-KY)
    Burr (R-NC)
    Chambliss (R-GA)
    Coburn (R-OK)
    Cochran (R-MS)
    Corker (R-TN)
    Cornyn (R-TX)
    Crapo (R-ID)
    DeMint (R-SC)
    Ensign (R-NV)
    Enzi (R-WY)
    Graham (R-SC)
    Gregg (R-NH)
    Inhofe (R-OK)
    Isakson (R-GA)
    Johanns (R-NE)
    Kyl (R-AZ)
    McCain (R-AZ)
    McConnell (R-KY)
    Risch (R-ID)
    Roberts (R-KS)
    Sessions (R-AL)
    Shelby (R-AL)
    Thune (R-SD)
    Vitter (R-LA)
    Wicker (R-MS)

    All voted for the rapists.

  • GoLikeHellMachine

    I don’t know about people outside of the Denver area (because, really, I don’t give a shit about the prairie and the goddamned mountains), but it’ll be interesting to see how many people actually vote for this fuckwitted, monstrous lunatic.