MEET YOUR CANDIDATES  2:15 pm November 13, 2009

Tom Tancredo To Be Next Governor Of Colorado

by Jim Newell

Gross: “Former U.S. Rep. Tom Tancredo appears to be inching closer to getting into the Colorado gubernatorial race. While he has yet to formally declare his candidacy or fill out paperwork with the secretary of state’s office, the Littleton Republican on Thursday told a Westword reporter he ‘fully intends to run.’” Watch his first “spot” above! [Denver Post]


Hola wonkerados.

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ManchuCandidate November 13, 2009 at 2:20 pm

Yes, cause immigration is the State’s responsibility not the Federal Gubbiment.

His opponents should role out: “Tom Tancredo: Too sad for Vietnam. Too crazy for Colorado.”

comicbookguy November 13, 2009 at 2:20 pm

Does this mean Colorado is going to finally close it’s borders? About flippin time!

Click November 13, 2009 at 2:21 pm

I couldn’t make out whether the voice-over said dead “muggers” or dead “mothers.” Until I know, I won’t be casting my vote.

Judas Peckerwood November 13, 2009 at 2:21 pm

Oh, that “hope” message is soooo passe.

Click November 13, 2009 at 2:23 pm

Oh – and he left out the part where the dirty messicans can cause parents to perform eleborate charades wherein they pretend their half-breed kid took off in a gigantic mylar balloon.

ph7 November 13, 2009 at 2:23 pm

Now we get to watch the Teabagging strategy bite the GOP in the ass. Win those primaries, wingnuts!

Gopherit November 13, 2009 at 2:25 pm

Yes, because a Governor can do all that.

Mahousu November 13, 2009 at 2:27 pm

I’m not going to watch the video, so I assume “Pushing Drugs. Raping Kids. Destroying Lives.” is his platform.

And here people were saying Republicans don’t stand for anything any more.

Gopherit November 13, 2009 at 2:28 pm

Pushing Drugs. Raping Kids. Destroying Lives.

We’re the GOP.

SmutBoffin November 13, 2009 at 2:28 pm

Tom Tancredo is a dumbfuck shotglassful of diarrhea…because someone needs to say it.

JMP November 13, 2009 at 2:29 pm

Because no drug dealers or kiddie rapists are natural-born citizens, yep. At least he’ll keep the imaginary Colorado-Mexico border safe!

Decker November 13, 2009 at 2:30 pm

All Tancredo’s opponents need to do is declare “War on Immigration” and watch Tancredo dodge the draft election.

AxmxZ November 13, 2009 at 2:34 pm

Sheriff murdered, crops burned, stores looted, people stampeded, and cattle raped.

slappypaddy November 13, 2009 at 2:35 pm

okay, what i see here is a screenshot that appears to indicate our country is being invaded by three young black people, a park ranger, and a shadowy figure i can’t quite make out, who are allegedly pushing drugs and raping kids and destroying lives. who let these people in? can farmer tom save us from them? can we pay him in hobo beans?

V572625694 November 13, 2009 at 2:39 pm

He’s tough all right, except when Markos Moulitsas is around. Then he tears off his microphone and flees like a little girl.

Deciding who can and can’t come into the country is one of the things governments of nations can legitimately do. Douche bags like Tancredo make it seem wrong. Yuck. Littleton Colorado, dreary suburban slum of sprawl. Ew.

bitchincamaro November 13, 2009 at 2:40 pm

[re=458006]Mahousu[/re]: & [re=458007]Gopherit[/re]: Copyright!

One Yield Regular November 13, 2009 at 2:44 pm

This is a golden opportunity for Dave Schultheis to come out of retirement and join Tom as Lt. Governor. They’d make such a cute couple.

ithasatilde November 13, 2009 at 2:45 pm

The problem here is not the imaginary Colorado-Mexico border he wants to defend, but the imaginary USA-Honduras border that Tancredo is pushing to up the security on here.

This ad looks like Tancredo watched the video where Jimmy O’Keefe tried to smuggle Salvadorian prostitutes through the Guyana-ACORN border and a broken lightbulb swimming in a river of Jameson went off in his head:

“I bet those people that only started hating Mexico when it became cool don’t even KNOW Central America is a country!”

Props for thinking outside the racism box, I guess.

bjkeefe November 13, 2009 at 2:46 pm

Dobbs/Tancredo 2012!

engulfedinflames November 13, 2009 at 2:47 pm

Some things never change.

Georgia Burning November 13, 2009 at 2:49 pm

[re=457994]Click[/re]: Those folks were from California. Actually, Tancredo would do better to rail on Texans and Californians moving into Colorado, unless he has a new source for hotel maids in Vail and Aspen.

Don't Mess with Joe November 13, 2009 at 2:50 pm

Since Colorado is one of those big square states, building The Fence should be a breeze for this jackass.

WadISay November 13, 2009 at 2:51 pm

Hmm, an anagram of “Tancredo” is “taco endr”.

geminisunmars November 13, 2009 at 2:52 pm

[re=457988]ManchuCandidate[/re]:” Too crazy for Colorado.” Sorry, not so.

Well, Colorado does border New Mexico, so we need to keep them New Messicans out. Too.

Jim Demintia November 13, 2009 at 2:52 pm

What an incredible shithead.

SayItWithWookies November 13, 2009 at 2:54 pm

From his Wikipedia entry:

In July, when Tancredo proposed that America respond to any future terrorist attack by bombing Mecca and other holy sites, John Podhoretz, writing on the National Review’s website, said: “Tom Tancredo is an idiot.”

Tom Tancredo: Not even sensible enough for other right-wing fanatics.

engulfedinflames November 13, 2009 at 2:55 pm

Tancredo? Tancredo?

what kind of name is that? Oh ya, it’s Native American for “heap big smoke no fire”.

Extemporanus November 13, 2009 at 2:57 pm

[re=458006]Mahousu[/re]: [re=458007]Gopherit[/re]: It’s known as the “Tan Credo”:

Phase 1: Push drugs
Phase 2: Rape kids
Phase 3: Profit!

shortsshortsshorts November 13, 2009 at 2:59 pm

[re=458007]Gopherit[/re]: Destroying Kids, Pushing Lives, Raping Drugs.

We’re really off message here.

Click November 13, 2009 at 3:02 pm

[re=458058]Extemporanus[/re]: “Tan credo?” David Brooks lives by it, or at least he wishes he did. Someday Thune.

hillarys_left_nut November 13, 2009 at 3:14 pm

Denver Post scooped by Westword again? (the Washington equivalent would be a WaPo reporter forced to make this attribution: “…as Marion Barry told a CityPaper reporter on Thursday…”)

Mickey7 November 13, 2009 at 3:14 pm

Never underestimate the stupid in this country. My sister lived in Albuquerque for a while and more than once she had mail returned ‘postage due’ for it being international, originating as it had in New ‘Mexico.’ This was the work of US postal employees in contiguous 48. Given the geographic ignorance of the majority of Americans, there’s just no telling if the average Coloradoan even knows they aren’t a border state.

Redhead November 13, 2009 at 3:24 pm

You know, it’s SO refreshing, in this current half-breed Muslin nazi-communist-socialist teabagging environment, to see someone just come on out and proudly declare his racism, instead of denying the obvious elephant in the room.

AbstinenceOnly Ed November 13, 2009 at 3:25 pm

No snark here; just run. Tancredo is pure satanic bile, like Joe Lieberman after a some spoiled milk.

S.Luggo November 13, 2009 at 3:27 pm

— If elected, Tancredo said he would reduce government spending and cut taxes.
McInnis said those are also his goals. —
This will be a campaign of contrasts.

AddHomonym November 13, 2009 at 3:43 pm

McInnis v. Tancredo! Talk about yer Super Bowl of Retardation! That’s what ya got right there.

DP November 13, 2009 at 3:46 pm

[re=458009]SmutBoffin[/re]: Perfect…though perhaps a larger vessel than a shotglass is needed to hold the full volume of his TomTancreedaria…maybe a 55 gallon drum. Galvanized, of course.

chascates November 13, 2009 at 4:23 pm

Sources: Lou Dobbs Prepping Possible Presidential Run

Dobbs & Tancredo will be a perfect 3rd (or 4th or 5th) party candidate!

Joining Huckabee/Romney and Ron Paul/Joe the Plumber

Bruno November 13, 2009 at 4:42 pm

No Americans would ever rape a kid or push drugs. Goddamn foreigns.

kewlguy42069 November 13, 2009 at 4:46 pm

Isn’t the rate of violent crime rate higher among citizens? If so, lol

lochnessmonster November 13, 2009 at 5:45 pm

Well Tom…why don’t you go back where YOU came from? The white man stole this land from the indigenous peoples…Including the Mexicans…

AbstinenceOnly Ed November 13, 2009 at 6:17 pm

[re=458222]chascates[/re]: I’ms still holding out for an all ___ the ____ ticket. Joe the Plumber? Larry the Cable Guy? Carrie the Pageant Whore? Republicans love themselves some blankety blank.

vitamins taken helmet on November 13, 2009 at 7:06 pm

[re=458027]V572625694[/re]: Littleton CO = Meth Prairie

rocktonsammy November 13, 2009 at 8:06 pm

Colorado has coloreds?

Click November 13, 2009 at 8:25 pm

[re=458357]lochnessmonster[/re]: The historical record has a funny way of beginning where you want it to. The Native American tribes spent years killing the fuck out of each other in their desire to inhabit and defend the best places to get steak.

LowerdPeninsula November 14, 2009 at 12:32 am

[re=457988]ManchuCandidate[/re]: “His opponents should role out: “Tom Tancredo: Too sad for Vietnam. Too crazy for Colorado.”


He should really just re-run for president. In a perfect world, though, he’d be at Guantanamo, or some assorted US-sanctioned gulag.

bullship November 14, 2009 at 1:38 pm

I’m confused. I thought the Republican party WAS the party of rape. How will I ever keep track.

bullship November 14, 2009 at 1:41 pm

I’m confused. I thought the Republican party WAS the party of rape. How will I ever keep track. Perhaps this will help.

Alexander (R-TN)
Barrasso (R-WY)
Bond (R-MO)
Brownback (R-KS)
Bunning (R-KY)
Burr (R-NC)
Chambliss (R-GA)
Coburn (R-OK)
Cochran (R-MS)
Corker (R-TN)
Cornyn (R-TX)
Crapo (R-ID)
DeMint (R-SC)
Ensign (R-NV)
Enzi (R-WY)
Graham (R-SC)
Gregg (R-NH)
Inhofe (R-OK)
Isakson (R-GA)
Johanns (R-NE)
Kyl (R-AZ)
McCain (R-AZ)
McConnell (R-KY)
Risch (R-ID)
Roberts (R-KS)
Sessions (R-AL)
Shelby (R-AL)
Thune (R-SD)
Vitter (R-LA)
Wicker (R-MS)

All voted for the rapists.

GoLikeHellMachine November 16, 2009 at 1:24 am

I don’t know about people outside of the Denver area (because, really, I don’t give a shit about the prairie and the goddamned mountains), but it’ll be interesting to see how many people actually vote for this fuckwitted, monstrous lunatic.

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