Wonkette
CBS has released two (2) short clips from Sarah Palin’s taped interview with Oprah, set to air this Monday. They are both terribly boring, and you can watch them after the jump! “I want to bone Levi Johnston at Thanksgiving,” is what Sarah Palin tells Oprah.
THE HOT SCOOP ON LEVI JOHN-STONE:
THE HOT POOP ON KATIE COURIC:
Exciting stuff! We hope Sarah, Levi, Oprah and Katie Couric have the best of Thanksgiving Dinners together.
Palin Oprah VIDEO: ‘Levi is Loved’ [Huffington Post]
Wait till she starts jumping up and down on the sofa.
Sarah who? Oprah who?
“I want to bone Levi Johnston…”
So do I. I guess that means she supports gay rights.
Uh - Todd, could you please come over here and sit on this bitch’s face?
I’m very upset that the woman in the Chase ad spent all her Chase dollars or whatever on that hideous dress, forcing her unemployed hedge fund manager husband to sacrifice his vacation plans prior to getting hauled in to face SEC charges. SHE NEEDS TO STAND BY HER MAN.
No, no, no. That’s not a good kind of crazy.
Not into the drama. Hmmm.
Sarah Palin Does Oprah
Is it Lesbian Thursday already?
I liked Oprah’s soft tone and her style of questioning. Unfortunately, only my dog’s were able to hear Screechy McWhinesap’s responses.
“Sarah does Oprah”? I’d watch that sex tape.
That Mom from Malcolm in the Middle LOOKS LIKE SHIT
What the hell is up with her hair? Pretty soon it’ll be as puffy as Phil Specter’s….
Mr Blifil: But the commercial felt like part of the real world and as soon as Palin came on it was as if somebody switched on the LHC and warped the world into some Cthulhu dimension. That was weird. Scary woman!
I think the correct word here is debone, which one does before making gravy out of him.
And since she twitted or twatted or whatever the hell she does, that she had a great interview with Oprah, I assume Oprah didn’t get all up in her grill…very disappointed in O.
Inviting Levi over for Thanksgiving - You know that crazy bitch has a turkey decapitation machine in her back yard. Levi, if I were you I’d just stay home and order Domino’s.
Is she wearing a wig? or maybe lots of extensions?
I have to say, the Chase ad with the SO TOTALLY OBVIOUSLY GAY GAY GAY “husband” ogling his
beard’swife’s dress was infinitely more interesting than watching that clinically insane harpy go full-on stupid for 41 seconds. Also, Oprah’s looking mightly “glandular” again, bless her heart.At the end of the interview, each audience member will look under her seat to find her very own murdered wolf pup.
I was going to say “retarded baby”, but that would have been in bad taste.
Needs moar bumpits.
I, too, was hoping Oprah would pull a million-little-pieces on her. After the Bible Spice talked about her pal Hopey?
Girl-on-girl, gay bukkake, Cleveland Steamer.
Who the hell’s writing these video clip headlines, Charles Lincoln III?!
WOW! I look GREAT in that pic!! Also!!
-wink_
-SP
keepinitrealyo: Oprah, PUMA. PUMA, Oprah.
Thanks for the Duracell and Swiffer commercials. That there’s some pee-in-yer-pants comedy stuff, that is!
Plasmasmell: Maybe she had plastic surgery on her hair as well as a brow lift, jaw reduction, cheek implants, neck lipo. Sarah Palin and Carrie Prejean: plastic surgery in Jeebus name.
Well now we know the level of political astuteness that Sarah requires in an interviewer — the closer to none, the better.
Min: I hate being simultaneous-but-second with my joke. It makes me look like such a plagiarizing doofus.
Texan Bulldoggette: Someone awhile ago suggested ‘Bumpits’, but it’s probably a little bit of weave. I’m looking forward to the day when she admits to having pattern baldness at age 17 ala Andre Agassi. I’d love to see her hair fly off at a book signing.
OK, I *only* clicked on those snowbilly videos to see said “chase ad” and all I got was a duracell commercial and a soft-core mop porn video. Which wasn’t that bad, but no “chase ad” and god knows I am not watching SP if I can at all help it.
queeraselvis v 2.0: And she comes across in that dress like a drag queen, which is obviously the husband’s secret wish that will get him through his missed “vacation,” which will be spent at highway rest stops while the wife is home watching chick flicks.
Yeah that dress is doing nothing for her…
http://static.funonit.com/foto/gnocche/molly_culver/molly_culver_03.jpg
I will watch but only to see the beaver pee in Sarah’s face.
Oprah is pretty fucking dumb, isn’t she? And hear comes Twatty Grifter, she has had a year to respond to the Universe getting to know her and recoiling with horror and saying ‘what a fucking trailer trash bimbo,” and now she is doing her George Costanza “oh yeah, well the 80 called and they want their hairstyle back” too little too late clueless response.
Haha, Sarah admits that Levi’s child is more beautiful than her retard.
While Oprah interviews can be fun, real Sarah Palin fans will want to donate to The Alaska Fund Trust the official legal fund created to defend the integrity of the Alaska Governor’s Office from an onslaught of political attacks launched against current Governor Sarah Palin, the First Family, and state-employed colleagues.
“Why, if only that stupid McCain campaign would have just let me go on Meet the Press and McNeil Lehrer, or set up a debate between me and Derrick Bok on the topic of social justice like I wanted to have, then people would have seen the real me. But nope, those silly McCain campaign people, gosh darn it, they tied my arms and wouldn’t let me duke it out in defense of those precious freedoms that the brave troops are fightin’ for over there in Iraqistan.”
Paul Tardy: this the second time you post this shit, dude.
MOG: “Not into the drama.”
That one kind of jumped out at me, too. Also, her laugh sounds just like Amy Poehler imitating Hillary Clinton’s laugh. Does this woman ever listen to the shit that comes out of her mouth?
I’m one of the bitterz today because I just saw that Health Care Reform ad with the sad music in the background while I man moves out of his nice little brick house and into a tiny, institutional looking apt. before visiting his wife in the hospital. It always makes me so sad, I want to hunt down Catholic Priests and kick them in the groan, then start shooting Republicans in the balls.
Imagine what being angry does to me. Or the sound of Sarah Palin’s laugh , also.
Smoke Filled Roommate: Hmm…they both do have a meth connection.
FAN: “Could you please sign my hair piece?”
SARAH: “Who should I make it out to? Valtrex? Haaahaha!”
FAN: “Uhh…what?”
SARAH: “Just drop yer drawers and point out the sore, OK? You’re holding up the doggone line.”
Sarah:Oprah:Obama:Ayers.
Sarah pals around with bomb-throwing, pinko hippies, who hate America and love terrorists who kill the troops and don’t even love Trig, also.
“real” “Sarah” “Palin” “fans” — Ha, ha, good one!
From Minute 13:
“I really didn’t know when my ghostwriter sent the book stuff to the publishing company that the term ‘going rogue’ is actually British slang for unprotected anal sex!!! Ya’ know, there, Oppie baby, I’ve ‘gone rogue’ about 500 times myself in my life–including a couppla’ times last night, honey!! It’s very big in certain parts of Alaska.”
Crank Tango: FlownOver: Interesting. Got the Chase ads here (San Diego). Some Lords of the Internet are channeling commercials according to a demographic map
V572625694: Has no one else gotten the toothbrush or mouthwash ad or whatever (I don’t know, I couldn’t finish) where some women leaves an all-grey dentist office and an electric tooth cleaner thing starts following her around an all-grey city like some sort of orally/Orly-fixated tentacle porn monster?!
I’m pretty fuckin’ far from OK…
What many don’t seem to understand is that Courecs’(sp) “other supreme court decisions that you don’t agree with” question was a softball in that the Anchorage newspaper had published S.P.s’ disagreement with “U.S. vs Beech” a few months earlier. So there’s a chance that she not only did not write it but was unaware that it had been published. Of course when you read “everything” you can’t be expected to retain all of it.
Paul Tardy: Paul *Tardy*. I get it! YOU ARE A SNEAKY BASTARD, laugher at Trig! For shame.
Prommie: That was real? The Alaska Trust Fund ad? Are you sure it wasn’t sarcasm?
I don’t have sound at my work computer. So she seemed hot to me. I would do her, but she would have to wear a ball gag.
Prommie: Way more than the second. Please support Sarah Palin by dontating to the The Alaska Fund Trust. Only you can keep Sarah Palin out of jail.
What did Bible Spice suggest for a book club selection? Oh, never mind.
If noxious, faux-coy insincerity released energy upon creation, Palin’s, “Hahaha, MUST we?” when Oprah references the Couric interview would power a decent size vibrator factory.
What’s with her female mullet?
Failed 2 Menace: That’s precisely how she escaped Oprah’s black hole.
I take it all back, THAT my friends, is presidential material if I have ever seen it.
Prommie: And he’s leaving $arah’s other money laundering schemes, I mean “donation sites”. What about SarahPac and SUFON (LOL)? I mean a twittering quitter biblespice bumpit from Wasilla can’t have too many slush funds, can she?
Paul Tardy: No, y’ brainless palinbot, we want to put Sarah Palin IN jail.
Although forcing other inmates to listen to her voice might be unconstitutional on the no-cruel-and-unusal-punishment angle. Apart from just plain mean.
So let’s just hope her palinbots finally see the light and turn on her like crazed rabid chihuahuas they are, each one getting a little bite for every $5 they’ve sent her.
S.Luggo: Don’t you mean “blessed little angel”?
foulmouthed mrscreant: Slush funds….hahahahaha, I get it.
Hell with waterboarding, let the CIA use an mp3 of that laugh.
Well, I got Buick commercials x2. Which shows that the lords of the internetz are not effectively targeting their advertising. Buick? Feh.
Oh, and the correct answer is not that she doesn’t like drama.
God, she stole Trigs laugh in the first one.
V572625694: I got two ads for cleaning products. Clearly my mother is behind this marketing campaign.
queeraselvis v 2.0: She’s big boned.
Hey I wonder if she went rogue when she was in Britain.
All she had to do to make the Couric interview a tiny bit better was to name one fucking magazine. She didn’t even have to read it - she just had to name one and she couldn’t even do that.
I’ll bet she didn’t pay for her own hair.
Gee,now I’m simultaneously happy and sad that the world’s going to end on 12/31/12. Happy that I won’t have to live through the Palin presidency, sad that I’ll be deprived of all the delicious snark resulting from it.
And a blithering dipshit shall lead them! Yea, verily. Also, too.
Ducksworthy: For old time’s sake.
(Man, my desecration skills have gotten sooo much better since then…)
SP should invite O to Wasilla and have the Todd give her a ride on his “snow machine” we hear so much about.
Extemporanus: Nice beaver shot.
Wait, that’s not Sarah Palin, her hair’s not totally fucked up and ugly.
Mr Blifil: I misunderstood that ad then. Hubby’s little smile at the end said: “I am so borrowing that dress next Sunday night when the bitch is at her mom’s”.
S.Luggo: Yes, thank you for not saying that.
Darkness: Are you sure we’re looking at the same video?
Add two opposed and fixed position bicycle pedals, with the clamp doodles to keep my feet securely in place, at about fourteen inches from the surgically altered end of my penis, giving me say, three feet of thrust without stretching my crotch, and that combined with Sarah Palin’s upturned fury moose ass and six tubes of KY, and a cryogenic cooling fan, and waaaaafuckinwhooooooo, I’m in politics…and that is at, say, 120 rpm….
Click: I’m not clicking that video. No sirree. Not even for someone named “Click”.
Darkness: Next Sunday night, hell. Fifteen minutes, tops, whereupon he will rip the dress from her body and declare that he looks a damn sight better in a size two than her scrawny ass ever would.
Darkness: You are a very wise man.
Darkness: You think the carpet matches the drapes?
That mop is more messed up than Trig’s diaper.
ShiningMathPath: new tooth veneers, too.
Is she wearing John McCain’s green screen?
“Is Uncle Fred invited for Thanksgiving dinner?”
A. Yes
B. No
C. There is no “C,” except in the world of hyper-dysfunction. In the history of yes or no questions, this one’s about the yes-or-no-iest. I wonder if Oprah realized that for her subject, all questions like these are in fact trick, “gotcha” questions revealing something deep and possibly embarrassing, like “what do you read?”.
P.S. I was wondering why a mop was in line at the DMV the other day.
Making mops able to drive but making them own really ugly cars is kind of like making cows able to write but not able to spell.
I will be heavily sedated by a Board Certified Anasthesiologist during the showing of this interview. I am truely looking forward to it.
Plasmasmell: Orly Taitz’s hairdresser.
Texan Bulldoggette: That haystack do is definately a hair don’t…
never before have I so anxiously anticipated the NYT book review.
Yes the coy, oh do we have to discuss Katie, is really obnoxious since Katie seems to get a whole chapter in the book she is supposedly talking about with O.
Why didn’t O ask her to name the REAL Americans?
REAL Sarah Palin fans won’t want to miss her pay-per-view Grudge Fuck with Levi Johnston, brought to you by National Review Online and Yukon Gold Moose Jerky.
It’s time she uses all the Oprah money to upgrade her glasses. I think some really golden rhinestone ones would be good. Or those huge sunglasses that spell out the designer name all over them
I will never listen to the B-52s again now that they’ve let Palin into the group. Too bad, I liked that band.
Crazy meth-twitching on the first answer. (Full disclosure: I know almost nothing about meth, but I assume Sarah Palin is an addict. Whatever drug is causing that twitching is worth finding out.) Twitching AND the body language of “no” for the first 5 seconds of her claiming Levi will be at Thanksgiving.