super bowl of retardation

Such A Vulgarian, This Teabagger

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Wonkette motorist operative “Marcus” sent us this telephone picture of the rather uncouth car he was stuck behind yesterday, during the Super Bowl of Retardation. This fellow hates Obama so much that he — and we’re presuming “he,” because how unladylike! — chose to attach a massive cut-out of a donkey shitting Obama’s head on his rear windshield, at the expense of his visibility. Another sticker reads, “King’s Dream is a Nightmare.” Oh that silly Martin Luther King Jr., always ripe for a joke. After the jump, another wacky leftover operative photo, from a Hill office.

We all know that the whole point of yesterday’s affair was to throw trash around the House office buildings and get arrested and maybe do meth at some point. Much of the trash, however, was from Dick Armey’s “astroturfing” organization, FreedomWorks, which pretends to give a shit about these angry wingnuts’ lives. Our Hill operative sent this picture and added, “our office just got teabagged with their lobbyist paid-for trash.” Many more offices suffered a similar fate, of a bunch of know-nothing jackasses trashing their offices with rich lobbyist Dick Armey’s fever dreams.

What ever happened to the good old days of lobbying, when things were polite! Some rich corporate fat cat would buy a congressman a Porsche, the congressman would vote for whatever, and America would win.

About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell


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  • finallyhappy

    I’d like to see that car parked where I live. I’m betting the driver wouldn’t get very far.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Yeah, no racism at all.

  • Yaybuls

    Vagina Coastgaurd.

  • Memphis050505

    Well, JKJ-3746, I didn’t vote for a socialist, either. Whatta dbag. I dare him to drive that truck down here….

  • Snarkalicious

    [re=452494]finallyhappy[/re]: You kiddin? I’m surprised motherfucker made it through DC.

  • freakishlystrong

    Man, D.C. can be very good-block/bad-block, wish this cracker had gotten lost.

  • JMP

    “King’s dream is a nightmare”. But the members of the dick army aren’t racists, oh no; just against Obama because of the socialist something something.

    One good thing about being stuck behind that car – you could rear-end it and it would look to be totally the teabaggers’ fault, thanks to the completely blocked rear window.

  • When will you Humans learn…

    [re=452494]finallyhappy[/re]: On account of all the “broken bottles.”

  • facehead

    What a dumb ass, he musta put the trucknutz on the front bumper!

  • Whiskeybaby

    Yeah, that King, dreaming of dignity and human rights for all American citizens, regardless of color. WHAT A DICK!!!

  • AnnieGetYourFun

    What does that one say on the left side? Lynch God Likes?

  • dum librul

    I think it actually says “King’s dream in a nightmare.” But what does that even mean? Does Beyonce write tea bagging bumper stickers in her spare time?

  • Gorillionaire

    I didn’t realize that disability checks for fatness could afford such a nice truck/camper combo.

  • Fox n Fiends

    i see he couldn’t afFORD a real education either

  • SayItWithWookies

    Of course he didn’t vote for the socialist — he probably thinks voting is an arrogant subversion of God’s law.

  • Doglessliberal

    [re=452497]ManchuCandidate[/re]: a friend of mine was on Hill yesterday and saw a sign that said on one side “KEN-YA TRUST HIM??” and on the other “KISS MAO ASS”.

    Do we really think any of this shit would be going on if he were not black? It really is depressing.

  • germansteel

    Five will get you ten the dirtball who owns that truck is on his way back to his mortgage-defaulted trailer home with a confederate flag hanging from a home made flag pole, a pregnant fatty girlfriend with tramp stamps all over her pasty, flabby arms and torso, 3 snotty nosed rug rats with poopy diapers and a flat screen tuned into Beck and Friends 24/7.

    Wanna bet?

  • Doglessliberal

    oh, and I am proud to see the VA plate and McDonnell sticker. Good to know this is a fellow citizen of the Commonwealth.

  • Doglessliberal

    [re=452520]germansteel[/re]: I actually bet he is someone with $$ from NoVa.

  • sarcasticusername

    god knows nothing says “respectable human being,” quite like hating on MLK’s wretched desire for basic equality & other such evils.

  • Smoke Filled Roommate

    [re=452494]finallyhappy[/re]: Where I live, it would be hailed as a hero. It would make many new friends.

  • pat robertsons personal trainer

    the windshield blocker reminds me of bill hicks’s anecdote about when barbara bush shat in rush limbaugh’s mouth so he could achieve an erection and properly masturbate while reagan peed on him. except rush’s scat munching actually happened and Pres. Obama was born in Kenya, not from a donkey.

  • davitydave

    They’re a living breathing James Ellroy novel — komplete with hate stickers.

  • freakishlystrong

    This must be one of those organic, grassrooty vans that M. Batshit was imploring her minions to get to D.C. in.

  • sleepy

    seems like that truck belongs in/on/within

  • Terry

    Virginia plates, what do you know!

  • iwillsavethispatient

    [re=452512]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: I think it says “Even God Likes… a good crucifixion once in a while”

  • house of the blue lights

    Dammit, I didn’t vote for the socialist either. If I’d known one was running, I wouldn’t have had to vote for that guy with the weird name.

  • Accordion-o-rama

    Watch for this guy in the 2012 primaries. He’s clearly got his hand on the pulse of the GOP.

  • Accordion-o-rama

    or something that’s pulsing anyway.

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    I pity the Hill operative who had to sweep up after the horde of smelly wingtards. Also, “Blah Blah, blah-di-blah” pretty much sums up the intellectual capacity of these morans.

  • fork-wielding maniac

    [re=452509]facehead[/re]: if you’ll notice, he has a 3-ball hitch.

  • spryte

    [re=452512]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: “Even God likes”….something something. I can’t tell! Damn you, Marcus, where are the close-ups?

  • prizepig

    Ha! It’s funny because it’s true.

  • DickTaterPeeNoShay

    He will be greeted as a liberator.

  • magpie

    the only thing this truck is missing are those giant testicles you mount to the hitch and a gun rack, guess the NRA sticker will do.

  • bathalax

    very subtle

  • Citizen Kitteh

    Wow, you still haven’t blurred out his license plate? Then again, he’s probably proud of the publicity – he’s certainly not shy about telling people what he thinks!

  • Doglessliberal

    [re=452573]magpie[/re]: are you new here? Those giant testicles? Someone needs to send magpie the many many links from teh Wonkette.

  • President Beeblebrox

    This is the kind of Virginian who thinks that he is sitting behind the tree-line on Seminary Ridge, at Gettysburg, waiting for the Union barrage to end so he and his fellow Rebs can gallantly march across the field and overrun the Feds, because Lee told them to.

  • AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=452544]iwillsavethispatient[/re]: Holy fucking shit. Seriously?

    I was just grabbing some lunch when I saw a massive pickup truck with a YOU LIE sticker. The “O” was, of course, the Obama icon.

  • Potater

    [re=452573]magpie[/re]: Hey, Meggles, we love your tits! You can stay, but only if you talk the Kool Kids’ language.

  • Extemporanus

    All this picture proves is that Wonkette motorist operative “Marcus” has a very warped view of Real Americans.

  • El Pinche

    [re=452580]Doglessliberal[/re]: We need to replace that wierd Wonkabout with Wonkwiki for all our memes.

  • Prommie

    Can anyone here help me out? You see, I have a problem; as a rich elite, I of course need to put in place mechanisms to keep the rural poor in their place, to prevent them from crossing the class divide and, for example, knocking up my daughters and competing on merit for high paying jobs with my sons. It seems some of the rural poors, or some intellectuals who have some odd sympathy for them, are on to the current mechanism, which is to pre-judge them on the basis of their accent, grammar, spelling, and cleanliness. So it seems that it may be necessary to come up with a more subtle way to practice this “bigotry” (Please note, I use the term used by another, although I am sure this word does not mean what the person who described our elite mechanisms for keeping the rural poors down with it thought it meant.)(I think he meant “more,” “custom,” “social rule.”)

    There was a time when tattoos, legible clothing, and bumper stickers of any kind whatsoever, except perhaps “Ducks Unlimited” were wonderful class indicia, but the lines have gotten blurred. Does anyone have any ideas?

  • Crazybroad

    If someone could lure this hateful idiot to Detroit, we’ll take care of him.

  • Next Great Pwndit

    [re=452580]Doglessliberal[/re]: Magpie had the wrong terminology but right idea – you really can’t trust an asshole who won’t even spring for a set of ‘nutz …

  • Crazybroad

    [re=452539]sleepy[/re]: Thank you — that link was Best.Birthday present.EVER.

  • Colonel Mustard

    [re=452511]Whiskeybaby[/re]: I want to see this “Martin Luther King, Jr.”‘s birth certificate!!1!

  • PoignancySelz

    Where’s the rainbow?

  • the problem child

    [re=452599]Prommie[/re]: I think you have accurately described my problem. Except for the kids marrying thing. You see, I am bigoted against wingnuts.

  • lumpenprole

    I find the lack of JEEEsus fish and ribbon magnets disturbing.

  • tiger

    Polly wanna?…

  • ella

    Lemme see if I’ve got this straight. Wingnuts are okay with a white woman who has a witch doctor drive out her demons in some fundie hole-in-the-wall tax exemption building in Alaska. But a black guy in the WH is terrifying.

    Good thing wingnuts aren’t bigots. Or anything.

  • tiger

    Can we please just have a civil war and get this over with already?

  • bamaboy


    It’s the teeth.

    Country teeth = Cracker every time

  • Don’t Mess with Joe

    [re=452522]Doglessliberal[/re]: Or maybe it’s Ken Cuccinelli taking a celebratory road trip into the nation’s capital.

  • S.Luggo
  • QueenOfTheDamned

    [re=452519]Doglessliberal[/re]: No, I don’t think this PARTICULAR shit would be going on if the hate object weren’t black. But, sometimes in my idle moments, I like to imagine the shit that would be going on if it was that Whore of Babylon, Hillary Clinton, instead. Just one of the small ways I entertain myself.

  • Words

    [re=452733]QueenOfTheDamned[/re]: Ooh, snap!

  • Flanders

    [re=452520]germansteel[/re]: c”mon, skoalrebel doesn’t have a tv!

  • Gumboz1953

    [re=452590]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Not without lots of beer.

  • Gumboz1953

    I think that a donkey shitting a black muslin head is prettier than an elephant shitting a white old fart head. So I’m glad the muslin won, so we don’t have to look at the ugly old fart alternative. I always try to look on the bright side of life.

  • Brendan M.

    [re=452620]Crazybroad[/re]: I’d wish you a happy birthday, but I need to see the birf certificate, long-form, first. Oh, you’re white? HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

  • Gumboz1953

    And during the rectification of the Vuldronaii, the Traveler came as a large, moving torb. Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the Meketrex supplicants they chose a new form for him – that of a giant sloar. Many shubs and zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the sloar that day, I can tell you.

    And then he came in the form of a large and shitting donkey in a Ford pickup with Virginia plates. Then we slimed him.

    No more coffee for me.

  • LowerdPeninsula

    Apparently, “Virginia is for lovers” except, of course, for the lovers of black people, who have been refered to, historically, as Ni….well, I won’t even go there. I’d love for this man — and you know it’s man — to drive that piece of shit white-trashmobile up here through the streets of Detroit…

  • Can O Whoopass

    he was off to firebomb a daycare center because the receptionist’s Dad was the cousin of a planned parenthood doctor in Flarduh.

  • Flanders

    [re=452599]Prommie[/re]: Thank you for the DU exemption. Becuase I completely understand the predicament you have so accurately described.

  • jseville

    Don’t confuse teabaggers with McCain voters. A teabagger wouldn’t have a McCain sticker, and considers democrats as usless as republicans. But oh what the hell! Why not just be ignorant and call everyone who dosen’t agree with Obama a Nazi, remember when everybody that didn’t agree with Bush was a terrorist? Ah, those were the good old days.

  • zhubajie

    [re=452531]davitydave[/re]: Where do you think James Ellroy gets his ideas and plot devices?

  • zhubajie

    [re=452550]house of the blue lights[/re]: Well, I wanted to vote for the Raving Loony Party, but there two of them!

  • Robert Zimmerframe

    [re=453176]jseville[/re]: Why not just be ignorant and call everyone who dosen’t agree with Obama a Nazi.


  • jseville

    [re=453623]Robert Zimmerframe[/re]:Yeah thanks for that, good one!

  • CARCUNTZ!(tm)-R-Us

    A true teabagger would haz TEH TRUCKNUTS!