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PHOTO TOURS  2:26 pm November 2, 2009

A Children’s Treasury Of Wonkette Readers’ ‘Political Halloween Costumes’

by Jim Newell

Oh look, we’ve finally written “this post.” Thank you to all of the operatives who sent in sexy pictures of their vulgar pagan bacchanalia dress. Our favorite would have to be this one from “J.R.’s friend Ross,” dressing up as ol’ orange tar-lungs, John Boehner. MILLIONS MORE, below.

“Brooke H.” went as “sexy Ruth Bader Ginsburg,” as if to imply that a “sexy” before the name “Ruth Bader Ginsburg” isn’t superfluous?

“Bryan K,” like so many others, went as a common confused racist. Much like “Brooke H.,” “Bryan K.” needs to do a better job decorating his house.

“Carl B.” dressed as a lie that Mark Sanford once told.

“Carolyn C.” and her boyfriend did the “other” Mark Sanford costume, of the governor and his Argentinian Firecracker, who famously had sex together this year.

“Genevieve”‘s boyfriend went as the fictional teabagger “Cletus,” with lots of hair and a sign that includes the awesome phrase, “Jesus + stuff.”

“Kelsey G.” went as celebrated queen birther lawyer-dentist Orly Taitz, and even brought along Barack Obama’s actual real-life bird certificate.

“Lee H.” and his wife also went as racists! “Lee” adds, “my wife really is 8 1/2 months pregnant.” Chug that High Life, pregnant wife lady!

“Michael L.” just went insane and looks to be having a great time.

“Randy C.” presumably carried around this sign, covered in his buddies’ pubes.

“Sara B.” went as Bo, the Mexican water dog that Barack Obama stole from Ted Kennedy on his death bed.

Sorry if we forgot any!

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 69 comments }

Monsieur Grumpe November 2, 2009 at 2:34 pm

Nice maracas.

the problem child November 2, 2009 at 2:36 pm

Sara B, you look just like you defiled Airforce One again! Great pics.

magic titty November 2, 2009 at 2:37 pm

Wow. Sara B. as ‘Bo’ is amazing.

WIN.NER.

Dave J. November 2, 2009 at 2:37 pm

Well, fuck, now I’m going to get a “funny” feeling every time I see Ruth Bader Ginsburg. THANKS FOR NOTHING, “Brooke H.”

Voyou Charmant November 2, 2009 at 2:38 pm

Dear, “Sara B.”

Hey, sup?

Potater November 2, 2009 at 2:38 pm

Fuck, I didn’t get my pics developed yet, Jim. Please say you’ll still take submissions. I won a “contest” with mine and wanted to share it.

EndlessMike November 2, 2009 at 2:39 pm

Can you send me Brooke H’s phone number? I’d love to get in her chambers!

Scott-san November 2, 2009 at 2:39 pm

He-LLO, Miss Taitz!

magic titty November 2, 2009 at 2:39 pm

Something tells me Brooke H. (if that is her real name) sits around the house like that all the time.

Fox News Light November 2, 2009 at 2:39 pm

I never got my “iPhone”.

dum librul November 2, 2009 at 2:39 pm

J.R.’s friend Ross appears to get his skin treatments at the same facility as our Wonkett’s kool-aid wielding Old from a couples months back.

chascates November 2, 2009 at 2:40 pm

A++++ to “Carolyn C.”, Argentinian Firecracker!!!

Mr. Dick Sprinkles November 2, 2009 at 2:41 pm

*sigh* I was hoping there’d be a pic of someone dressed as Shelley “Dracula Cunt” Sekula Gibbs.

Some excellent costumes in this batch nonetheless. Nice jobbies!

P.S. Do not under any circumstances do an unfiltered Google Image search for “Dracula Cunt.” You have been warned.

user-of-owls November 2, 2009 at 2:42 pm

Disappointing, I must say. Not a single Shelley Dracula-Cunt in the whole lot.

randomsausage November 2, 2009 at 2:43 pm

Sara B….always on all fours.

the problem child November 2, 2009 at 2:43 pm

[re=448315]Potater[/re]: What is this “developing” of pics you speak of? And did the ladies like your “etchings”?

BeWoot November 2, 2009 at 2:43 pm

Everyone is very cute. But Oily Taintz look way too sane, and insufficiently mascaraed.

Mr. Dick Sprinkles November 2, 2009 at 2:44 pm

[re=448325]user-of-owls[/re]: Great minds, etc.

Humpback November 2, 2009 at 2:44 pm

[re=448315]Potater[/re]: Developed?! Points off for last century silver halide technology.

Roger Williams hates your ways November 2, 2009 at 2:45 pm

ladies b hot

Dashboard_Buddha November 2, 2009 at 2:47 pm

Nice gams, Brooks. I love how red fishnet stockings give a lovely glow to the legs of a beautiful woman…um, excuse me. I’ll be back.

Lascauxcaveman November 2, 2009 at 2:49 pm

Well, I hope you were all out getting happy drunk at your parties and having attractive-young-single-person sex with each other, because you certainly deserve it!

I was wandering my old nabe being the neighborhood dad to (at times) eight pre-teen trickertreaters, who were variously complaining about how cold it was, complaining that so-and-so was running ahead of the group, complaining that so-and-so rang the doorbell when it wasn’t their turn, and snitching on each other for not saying “thank you,” ad infinitum.

It was pretty fun, but not as fun as getting happy-drunk and having attractive-young-single-person sex, which is the True Meaning of Hallowe’en.

El Pinche November 2, 2009 at 2:50 pm

I guess it’s masturbation Monday…..AGAIN.

Potater November 2, 2009 at 2:51 pm

[re=448330]the problem child[/re]: [re=448333]Humpback[/re]: By “developing” I meant “haven’t stolen off stalkee’s Facebooks yet.”

Tomato, tomato.

I-man November 2, 2009 at 2:51 pm

A Oompa Loompa that isn’t a midge(little person)…I’m scared. Of course Boehner does illicit this kind of reaction from me everytime I see him on telly. Best costume has to go to Ross.

mattbolt November 2, 2009 at 2:54 pm

This comment isn’t about masturbating to the pictures of these women, so, y’know, you can enjoy a brief break from that as you read through these comments. Welp, onto the next masturbation comments:

Extemporanus November 2, 2009 at 2:54 pm

[re=448331]BeWoot[/re]: But it’s nice to see Victoria Jackson involved in something entertaining for a change, isn’t it?

P.S. I want my velvet X-wing painting back, ASAP!

PerhapsSo November 2, 2009 at 2:56 pm

I think that Sara B. is my favorite, but everyone did an excellent job! (Says the lady who is way too lazy to do this “Halloween” business but prefers to consume massive quantities of candy and beer without the pretext of dressing up.)

Prommie November 2, 2009 at 2:58 pm

These children frighten me. Are any Wonkette readers over 12? Sexy Ruth Ginsberg, thats child pron.

Lascauxcaveman November 2, 2009 at 2:58 pm

[re=448346]Potater[/re]: And my portraitist declares he must first let the oils cure a fortnight before applying the varnish sealer-coat before mine is ready for shipping. By then there shall be an East coast bound packet steamer coming ’round, with luck.

Mad Brahms November 2, 2009 at 3:00 pm

[re=448318]Scott-san[/re]: Really, I’d heard people go on about how the actual Orly Taitz was sort of hot in an old-lady kind of way, and was always puzzled, but now… now I sort of get it, if only because when I see her now I just replace her face with that costume.

*Well played*

finallyhappy November 2, 2009 at 3:01 pm

I sent a photo of us as the real death panels(zombies). It was too crappy to post?
Kelsey G does has the vacant Orly look but she is way too cute and her hair looks real. Love Sara “Bo”

El Pinche November 2, 2009 at 3:01 pm

[re=448357]Prommie[/re]: One day I’ll grow up to be a commenter at Crooks&Liars or Thinkprogress. In the meantime,..TRUCKNUTZ!!

Mad Brahms November 2, 2009 at 3:02 pm

I also have a soft spot for Boehner, not because it’s particularly good (though hey, nice orangeness!), but simply because it needed to be done. Rock on, tarlungs.

StoneAge November 2, 2009 at 3:05 pm

Great costumes all around. Sadly, no one at the parties I go to would get these references. I need new friends. Fake Orly Taitz, call me any time.

bathalax November 2, 2009 at 3:06 pm

jesus + stuff rulez

PoignancySelz November 2, 2009 at 3:06 pm

[re=448357]Prommie[/re]: UhOh, I just downloaded Brooke H…..Calling all cyber cop cars, be on the lookout….”Honest officer, Jim told me she was 18″

Dag, not a yellow tooth in the bunch.

Mista Eko November 2, 2009 at 3:19 pm

Orangeface is the new Blackface

CapnFatback November 2, 2009 at 3:22 pm

[re=448330]the problem child[/re]: Judging from the pictures of Brooke H. and Carolyn C., they’re mighty developed already.

Zorg November 2, 2009 at 3:24 pm

I so want to groom Sara “B.” And, give her a dead squirrel to roll around on afterwards…

teebob2000 November 2, 2009 at 3:26 pm

[re=448315]Potater[/re]: “Developed???” Did you go as a Luddite and you’re still in costume?

Guppy06 November 2, 2009 at 3:26 pm

Between Sara B. and the ol’ stock photo used for the WaPo beatdown, it’s apparently Furry Day at Wonkette.!

american mutt November 2, 2009 at 3:27 pm

I need some poli-sci friends who will dress up like sexy politicians with me next year.

Guppy06 November 2, 2009 at 3:35 pm

[re=448426]american mutt[/re]: Please, don’t. I just had visions of “Sexy Hillary Clinton” in a hip-hugger pantsuit.

bago November 2, 2009 at 3:38 pm

Do you know how long it took to farm those pubes?

Country Club Jihadi November 2, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Sara B is adorable. Looks like she could have used Presidential Knee-Pads. That couldn’t have been comfortable all night.

chascates November 2, 2009 at 3:46 pm

Post a photo of Riley. We KNOW he dressed up as something!!!

Extemporanus November 2, 2009 at 3:48 pm

On behalf of heavy petters everywhere, I give you:

An Iconic Representation of Sara B’s Love for Bo Obama

mollymcguire November 2, 2009 at 3:49 pm

Had that guy who painted the “Jesus Delivers the Constitution” picture included a Supreme Court Justice who looked like that, I would have bought the damn thing

Citizen Kang November 2, 2009 at 3:51 pm

I love the judicial temperament on Brooke H..

Accordion-o-rama November 2, 2009 at 4:33 pm

Orange dude needs more tears.

Flanders November 2, 2009 at 4:38 pm

[re=448343]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: I’m with you. I look at all these attractive-single-person pictures (especially YOU, Sara B) and wistfully remember those days. Yeah, that and remembering the loosely-decorated, trashy apartments with nothing on the walls and Ikea/velvet couches that seem to go with those carefree days of yore.

June Cleaver 2.0 November 2, 2009 at 4:43 pm

Kelsy G cracked me up! She should have gone trick or treating at the whitehouse!

Mr Blifil November 2, 2009 at 4:48 pm

Brook H. is not coming up on my ‘puter. I haz a sadz.

June Cleaver 2.0 November 2, 2009 at 4:49 pm

Sara B is cute!

President Beeblebrox November 2, 2009 at 5:01 pm

The Real Merkins are made of WIN.

vkladchik November 2, 2009 at 5:37 pm

You guys picked the hot ones.

Dreadful Gate November 2, 2009 at 5:38 pm

[re=448324]Mr. Dick Sprinkles[/re]: Sure, warn me, but I googled Dracula Cunt anyway. You’re right. Don’t be going there. Phew.

Reefpilot November 2, 2009 at 5:49 pm

Brooke H. could polish my gavel any day. Wow.

Reefpilot November 2, 2009 at 5:50 pm

Oh, and Sara B kinda looks like the real killer of Heath Ledger, aka 1/2 of the Olsen twins.

ShiningMathPath November 2, 2009 at 6:40 pm

[re=448320]Fox News Light[/re]: How can you tell?

Jim89048 November 2, 2009 at 7:32 pm

Wait! WAIT! LET ME FINISH!

fapfapfap

Potater November 2, 2009 at 9:38 pm

[re=448423]teebob2000[/re]: I was an authentic wingnut — they still use Daguerrotypes.

LowerdPeninsula November 3, 2009 at 1:43 am

I really like Sara B’s and Kelsey G’s costumes. I do wish Jim would have posted screenames (if they partiers agreed, of course), so we could heap praise upon our fellow wonketeers more personally.

Atheist Nun November 3, 2009 at 1:44 am

“Carl B.” dressed as a lie that Mark Sanford once told.
We Have A Win-nah! Very subtle, I like it.

Silver: “Orange John Boehner”
Bronze: “Sexy Ruth Bader Ginsburg”

remembers when Wonkette was funny November 3, 2009 at 11:05 am

I’m not sure Ruth ever looked that sweet, but I’ll accept “Brooke H’s” rulings any time. Bang that gavel baby!

Fox n Fiends November 3, 2009 at 3:41 pm

Brooke H is beautiful

aeiou November 4, 2009 at 7:33 am

I will break up my marriage for that vapid ORLY?! stare, Kelsey G!~

acidosis November 5, 2009 at 3:33 pm

Brooke H., you can bader my ginsburg any day……if you know what I mean ;)

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