• February 15, 2012

The White House released its visitors’ log, which was something people cared about whenever everyone was earnest about Transparency like a few months ago. Obama released 481 names—which is actually only a selection of all the visitors—but the list is like the Oscars Red Carpet + a visitors’ log from a prison in the 70s + a random list of names X 100! Names after the jump: Nobodies will be briefly glossed, while status-y names will written in bold, for such is their wont.

Oprah Winfrey
George Clooney
Brad Pitt

Andy Stern head Service Employees International Union, participant in literally zero Oceans Films
Serena Williams
George Soros
Denzel Washington

“Billy Clinton,” William Ayers, Jeremiah Wright, all of whom the White House is claiming are just homophonic/homonymic impostors decoys
Maurice Greenberg
Jesse Jackson

[Times Online]

{ 44 comments }

Suds McKenzie November 2, 2009 at 9:37 am

Vince Shlomi was a suprise.

OReillysVibrator November 2, 2009 at 9:39 am

Bill Ayers and Jeremiah Wright would have been perfect in the Oceans 11 scene where they cause a big stink and needlessly distract everyone in an effort to loot the house’s money.

ManchuCandidate November 2, 2009 at 9:40 am

Why does the list also include Lrrr: Ruler of Omnicron Persei 8?

Monsieur Grumpe November 2, 2009 at 9:43 am

If Andy Richter isn’t on this list I’m not impressed.

Larry McAwful November 2, 2009 at 9:45 am

I bet Kathy Griffin was there, but doesn’t get her name bolded. Again. There goes the gay vote…

Whiskeybaby November 2, 2009 at 9:46 am

aw, that picture gets you right in the ovaries

pampl November 2, 2009 at 9:47 am

Look you can call Ayers and Wright homophonic all you want, but my main man Billy Clinton is totally cool with those people.

Potater November 2, 2009 at 9:49 am

Where’s the FEMA Death Camp director? I want to be assured that my wingnuts are being exterminated in a timely and efficient manner.

Aflac Shrugged November 2, 2009 at 9:51 am

No Pat McCrotch or Barry McCockinya? No obvious aliases from drunk/high/medicated visitors = shenanigans on this list.

Terry November 2, 2009 at 9:52 am

Obama’s good with kids, doesn’t look like he’s never held one before.

finallyhappy November 2, 2009 at 9:54 am

I have a friend who has been twice already( her name will not be bolded) but where is my invite???

4tehlulz November 2, 2009 at 9:55 am

[re=447998]Potater[/re]: Serena is the FEMA death camp director. She will kill you by waterboarding you with tennis balls..

Monsieur Grumpe November 2, 2009 at 9:56 am

Where are the Lizard people?
Don’t isolate that voter block Hopey.

JMP November 2, 2009 at 9:56 am

[re=447999]Aflac Shrugged[/re]: There was one guy that came out pronounced “John Boner”; that was an obvious fake.

Paul Tardy November 2, 2009 at 10:05 am

Billy the Gorilla Gram guy is a code name for who?

the problem child November 2, 2009 at 10:06 am

“Billy Clinton,” William Ayers, Jeremiah Wright, all of whom the White House is claiming are just homophonic/homonymic impostors decoys

I’d buy that for Billy and Jerry, but not for Willy.

magic titty November 2, 2009 at 10:09 am

That little baby is so cute; she has personally saved my Monday.

bathalax November 2, 2009 at 10:12 am

mao, stalin, dr. doom, prophet mohammad, bonnie, clyde, pablo escobar

H_Tuttle November 2, 2009 at 10:19 am

New list released:

Fabio
Uma Thurman
Carl Sagen
Kathy Griffin
yul Brynner
Otto Preminger
Upton sinclair
Fred Flintstone
Orly Taitz
Xerxes

Serolf Divad November 2, 2009 at 10:21 am

I would have sooooo much more respect for this Obama if he really did have Ayers and Wright over for a sleepover.

Jim Demintia November 2, 2009 at 10:26 am

Plus everyone who ever worked at Goldman Sachs.

MFAWG November 2, 2009 at 10:27 am

[re=448011]Serolf Divad[/re]:

Exactly! We won, remember? Also.

Terry November 2, 2009 at 10:27 am

[re=448011]Serolf Divad[/re]:

Me, too. It would also cause a whole bunch of people to immediately have major strokes so there would be entertainment, too.

Serolf Divad November 2, 2009 at 10:29 am

Here’s my list:

My mom
My dad (not at the same time: divorced)
My kid’s friend (sleepover)
Buddy from work and his wife
A bunch of ladies from my wife’s church group
The gas man
The cable guy
Inlaws (a whole week! egad!)
Our neighbors
An old friend passing through town
George Clooney
The termite guy
Bill, another friend from work & his girlfriend
A bunch of my daughter’s friends (birthday party)

gurukalehuru November 2, 2009 at 10:40 am

I was so excited, and then so let down. Barry could have made all progressives happy and had all the reptilians rolling on the ground and frothing at the mouth in apoplectic, and impotent rage, just by inviting William Ayers and the Reverend Jeremiah Wright over for a cup of tea and a tour of the White House garden.
After that, he could absolutely do whatever the fuck he wanted to with the remaining 7 years and 3 months of his term.

gurukalehuru November 2, 2009 at 10:43 am

[re=448016]Serolf Divad[/re]: That George Clooney does get around, doesn’t he?

JesusButter November 2, 2009 at 10:43 am

[re=447994]Whiskeybaby[/re]: it certainly does. What a perfect, round, pink little thing! Plus, the ultra-cool and handsome man holding her doesn’t help.
(Stuff it Sarah, Pelosi’s baby is way more “Blessed Little Angel”)

rocktonsammy November 2, 2009 at 10:51 am

Contributors under$100,000.00 are nobodies?

Dreamer November 2, 2009 at 11:10 am

Are you saying that baby is Bill Ayers, kinda like the Curious Case of Bengamin Button?

bitchincamaro November 2, 2009 at 11:21 am

Some quick math shows Moe Greenberg collecting about $ 61 billion per visit. I hope he brought a decent bottle of red, at least once.

Dr. Spaceman November 2, 2009 at 11:23 am

So who-all are these other Ayers and Wrights?

McDuff November 2, 2009 at 11:31 am

[re=447991]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Obama must have been paying the yearly tribute of Candy Hearts to Omnicron.

hobospacejunkie November 2, 2009 at 11:50 am

50 years from now recently-released, secretly-recorded video from Obama’s administration will reveal the Reverend Jeremiah Wright taking a portrait of a slave-owning president from the White House walls & rubbing one out on it, then replacing it back on the wall.

thefrontpage November 2, 2009 at 12:53 pm

Here’s the Official List of White House Visitors for Saturday, October 31st, 2009, Halloween, which is very interesting:

1. Alice Cooper.

2. Rob Zombie.

3. Eli Roth.

4. George Romero.

5. Dario Argento.

6. Asia Argento.

7. Stephen King.

8. Peter Straub.

9. Harlan Ellison.

10. Wes Craven.

11. William Friedkin.

12. Robert Englund.

13. Dick Cheney.

–30–

AKAM80TheWolf November 2, 2009 at 1:06 pm

[re=448025]gurukalehuru[/re]:

Red ‘V’ for Victory!

AKAM80TheWolf November 2, 2009 at 1:08 pm

My idol and eccentric lord of fabrics and cosmetics Yenz Von Tilborg was there! Are you scared? He’s not, he’s just him.

Mr Blifil November 2, 2009 at 1:11 pm

What’s the difference between the visitor’s list and the enemies list?

davesnothere November 2, 2009 at 1:31 pm

C’mon, isn’t it obvious? If he needs to talk to, say, Hitler, or Norman Thomas, he can just go to their place! Wake up, sheeple!111

Extemporanus November 2, 2009 at 1:34 pm

I thought the visitors were supposed to be transparent, but I can find no mention of a Raines—let alone an Ellison—anywhere on the list.

NotthatLC November 2, 2009 at 1:36 pm

That’s Nancy Pelosi’s granddaughter he’s holding, just in case anyone cares. Barry, he is good with teh babies, yes?

Back to our regularly scheduled snark, then.

sezme November 2, 2009 at 2:03 pm

Whenever I have to sign in somewhere, I always put down Mao Tse Tung, William Ayers, Lex Luthor, Jeremiah Wright… Something like that.

[re=448223]NotthatLC[/re]: Really? He’s reduced to babysitting in exchange for a workable health care bill? Sure, why not?

WillyWonka November 2, 2009 at 2:16 pm

What a shallow Government we have!

Accordion-o-rama November 2, 2009 at 2:32 pm

Caption: Mmmmm, white meat! Obama picks out a roaster for White House Thanksgiving.

(Remember Barack, 15 minutes per pound.)

Dean Booth November 2, 2009 at 5:14 pm

That’s not a visitors list, that’s a list of Obama’s new Czars!

“You get a Czar! And you get a Czar, and you…”

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