Wonkette
It’s a sad-ass day for America when the Secret Service lets this dirty old robot eat the country’s first black president. [White House Flickr]
CAPTION CONTEST
Russian Feeds Barack Obama To Mean Robot
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5:15 PM
on Wed October 28 2009
By
Mizz Wonkette
1792 Views
And who(m) is Mizz Wonkette, hmm?
The hell is a “Mizz Wonkette?” (?)
CHANGE FRIGHTENS ME.
So… The Obama-Bot is a SOVIET Tool, heenngggnh?! I’ve suspected this for FIVE AND A HALF YEARS!!!!111!
OM NOM NOM NOM NOMSKOVICH!
As long as it isn’t Richard Nixon’s head on a robot.
http://fc00.deviantart.com/fs29/f/2008/050/5/4/Robot_Nixon_DevID_by_vaclon.jpg
BTW, who is Mizz Wonkette?
Meghan?
Is Mizz Wonkette the nom-de-plume of the newly rebuilt cyborg-Obama?
when i mean robot, I certainly don’t feed barack obama. yeah, I need a nap.
Is Mizz Wonkette a sexist?
We can make you bigger, stronger, faster; and then you can run in slow motion all the time.
Where do I sign?
That’s the most sophisiticated vodka distillery I’ve ever seen.
What, no women scientists?
It’s just a prototype, but it already gives a better blowjob than the former Miss California.
“Mizz Wonkette”? Ken? Is that you?
“Da, Mr President. Zis is lazer vich ve are usink to clean Glorious Leader Putin’s inwincible cockski.”
“Shit, Ivan…does it come in a ‘large’.”
“Barack Obama inspects the Google machinery that sorts out which ads go to which websites.”
No, really, Meghan, is that you?
Even a body-chomping machine can’t make Barry scream. He’s one cool customer. He even looks like he may take a bite out of the other guy while he’s there.
the problem child: so it passes the Turing test?
I want to see Mizz Wonkette’s tits.
Goddamnit Ken.
“Noooooooooo, Mister Obondma….I expect you to DIE!”
What happened to the Dick Cheney/Kay Bailey Hutchinson post I was just reading? Dick Cheney *got* to you, didn’t he? DIDN’T HE????!?!?!911
“We think our machine will garner bipartisan support, Mr. President — it actually turns solar energy into coal.”
“And they come out here, nutritious and tasty.”
Is Mizz Wonkette anything like Miss America?
If so, do you have a swimsuit competition?
Talent ? I’m a big fan of flaming baton twirling.
And I don’t mean some guy with hairy legs in drag.
“Even after the VIP tour Barack Obama was unable to determine what Sarah Palin’s Pie Spy business hoped to accomplish.”
Because, you know, Meghan, if that’s you, I was just joking about you and Mark Sanford and the duct tape. Ha, ha, ha. Even with writing on your face you’re sexier than that Argentina girl. And I’m not just saying that because of your, you know, breasts. Meghan? I’ve got a David Hockney book. Meghan?
“And zees is our four-speed vibrator, with settings for Blend, Vhip, Froth, and Puree. Vhen your Sarah Palin saw zis, she vanted zee five-speed model, with zee turbo attachment she called zee Levi.”
Obama could wear a Dukakis tank helmet or a Kerry baby-blue dust-chamber suit and still look cool as hell.
Great Old Ones Party: Not necessarily. It could still beat her cold if she couldn’t pass the Turing test herself. Which she might not.
Can’t Pete Souza get a pinhole camera or something? I’m tired of all these finite-depth-of-field photos he keeps posting.
But Captain, I’m giving her all that she’s got! she just can’t take anymore!
Baby Sara K. Smith?
“This one goes to eleven.”
“Irv, are you sure this is the new smoking area?”
“Caractacus, you’re absolutely sure this car will fly me and the family all the way to Vulgaria?”
WTF?
That device delivers the world’s biggest bong hit. Obama is just there delivering the check so one gets installed in the West Wing.
Obama is BLACK?
Sarah?
He’s still bigger than the dancing MC Steele up top!
Transformers 3: The Revenge of the Halliburton
Mechanoid, a former Republican VP, seeks to waterboard the Earth and to overthrow America’s dithering Ugandan prince.
Trailer hook: “No one, but no one, puts baby in a corner!”
Starring Charlton Heston’s re-animated corpse, or available parts thereof, as Mechanoid.
With:
Rahm Emmanuel as Semi-Digit. “Somewhat take that, Mechanoid!”
Bob Gibbs as Snipe.
And Bo as Lassie.
Welcome back, Ana Marie Cox! Butterstick! Buttsecks to you, I say!
We knew you’d come back, we just didn’t think teh printed media would die so quickly.
I don’t know, guys. I think this is what Obama must look like on the inside and he took off his human skin and let himself fully expand. They don’t call in the “Chicago Machine” for nothing.
People denying the existence of president-eating robots may be president-eating robots themselves. /samwaterston
Lascauxcaveman: That was MY first thought, Ana Marie, Wonkette Emeritus
“I am the Mizz…and I am awesome!!!”