Wonkette
It’s like a veto, but with a half-cryptic message! Schwarzenegger’s office responds that this is just a “weird coincidence,” kind of like that time when foreign actor Arnold Schwarzenegger somehow became Governor of California. And yet! The bill he was rejecting in this letter was one dealing with financing for San Francisco ports, sponsored by San Francisco assemblyman Tommy Ammiano, who apparently shouted “kiss my gay ass” at the governor at an event earlier this month. Meanwhile, California is still broke. [SF Chronicle]
I lost all my money in the stock market, but this made me laugh.
Million to one shot, doc.
Who figured this out, FOX Newt News?
Arnold to legislature: STICK AROUND.
Or perhaps “If it bleeds, I can veto it”. Also, and seriously, how is financing a major seaport not an issue worthy of attention? I’d understand this better if he was vetoing a bill for a new performing arts center or something…
A caustic acrostic.
The birth of a new legislative meme.
You know, if you give an infinite number of interns an infinite number of typewriters…
This is the end of innocense.
I lost my decoder ring so I can’t figure out what “FUCK YOU” means in American. Little help?
Well this is unprecedented. Not the obscenity — Republican writing with subtext.
It wuz the Freemasons!
Mad Brahms: What? Ventura said “If it bleeds, I can kill it!” Re-watch predator!
The telling sign that this is not a “weird coincidence” is the phrase “kicking the can down the alley” which is so awkward and out of place. Also, a telling sign is that it spells out F You.
It’s good material for Pox Noise, being a dig at a gay stronghold, but how will they explain any arrangement of letters to their nation of illiterates?
“See, if you start at the left, as you’re sposeta, and instead of going right, like you should, you go down, like they do, and you only pick the big letters?”
Actually, this gambit was first employed, I believe in a campus newspaper, sometime in the sixties by a writer who went on to other notable enterprise.
The bill itself would apparently have helped create #70 in a row of dreary North Beach tourist traps.
Ammiano: “Kiss my gay ass”
Ahnuld: No, no, “I fuck you.”
SEXYTIME! Californication, here we cum!
He then knocked out his press secretary and said “YOU’LL HAVE TO EXCUSE MY FRIEND HE’S DEAD TIRED”
To the Honorable Joe Lieberman:
Senator:
Unfortunately, I
Can no longer
Keep up
My contributions to
You campaign.
Do not hesitate to call if
I
Can assist in the future.
Kindest regards,
W
petehammer: I know! I had to say “keeking dee cann down dee aahhlee” out loud and it just didn’t seem right. Also wtf does it mean?
to be fair, it actually reads, “I fuck you.” Which is true, if only metaphorically.
Crank Tango: I think it was a game they had in Austria, except it was a Jewish kid and not a can.
SayItWithWookies: Since they think of Arnold as a RINO and mostly hate his guts it’s probably an anomaly and not indicative of the True Republican Party.
applause.
norbizness: Then he impaled an assemblyman on his boner, getting it all bloody in the process. Arnold monotoned, “Check out my redwood.”
pattycake: Well if we’re being all semantical about it, it’s “Ti Fuck Yousa” which indicates the intern that wrote this has been possessed by the spirit of Vulgar Jar-Jar Binks.
Acrostic
Schwarzenegger’s
Secret
Hatred
Offends
Legislators
Everywhere
I for one approve of politicians metaphorically and cryptically fucking me instead of the standard ass-rape that they usually provide.
I have to give props to anyone who uses a method found in a Simpson’s episode in real life.
Of course I believe it’s a hilarious coincidence. If you write enough memos your bound to come up with one cryptic FUCK YOU written to a rival or adversary. It’s just a matter of random chance, people. Statistics, probability and whatnot. Another example: The Torah and Moby Dick tell us when the world will end.
How many points you want to give the brainiac who deciphered the message?
Zadig: The only thing I hate more than Mr. Binks is Jar-Jar Lierberman.
Zadig: Ti Fuck Yousa was the cheaper, Mexican equivalent of John Philip Sousa. Arnold is calling the guy derivative and unoriginal.
I will now spend the remainder of my afternoon drafting a memo that cryptically reads GET IN THE CHOPPAH.
RoscoePColtraine: So….if 100 monkeys sat at 100 keyboards and typed for 100 hours…..aaaahhhh never mind.
oh the lucky lowly intern in every California State office, newspaper, news agency, etc. that now will have to go back through all of the Governor’s past memos. Wonkette might want to get on this as well….Rileyyyy!!!!
Wow. Ahnuld just put Wonkette out of business by using up all the snark.
His best work since Total Recall.
The memo is worded funny, if you read it straight, and imagine it coming from Arnold. I might just have to rethink my earlier post, where I stated my belief that the FUCK YOU was random.
It’s a doubly-delicious “fuck you” because he failed to sign the “fuck you” memo regarding the failure to sign the other thing. This is great.
Uncle Joe: [ standing, clapping }
Fine, if you people are
under so much pressure to
cruise the nets just so you can
kick someone when they are down, then
You are not the type
of people I want to associate when I’m
unemployed.
Why anyone would come to this site
once in a while and
not be nice, well then i don’t
know.
everyone I know is
telling me to stop visiting
this site and to join
everyone else who is jumping on the GOP bandwagon.
RoscoePColtraine: I think the torah just prooves the joos did 911. where is that pyramid paster when ya need him? He really would have eaten this shit up.
RoscoePColtraine: You know, stuff like this seems intentional. I don’t believe in coincidences…
No, Arnold. Fuck you.
I am reminded of the time - decades ago - when i was 17 and got my first car. I convinced the State of Texas I was president of a group called United Catholic Kids for America’s Youth and was granted the personalized license plate UCKFAY. It lasted about a month until someone turned me in and they sent me new, generic plates.
Ah-nuld ain’t fuckin’ nobody.
RoscoePColtraine: Please put a warning on those pics.
Nearly got me fired when my boss walked in as I was clicking on your link.
… The Memo:
In which much hilarity and scrutinization ensued based on a cryptic, marginalized maybe-insult, until it was followed by another memo that actually said, in boldface: “Oh, I almost forgot, Fuck You.”
P.S. - the margins on John Kerry’s memos spell the entire contents of War and Peace.
guerilla-nation: And I got reamed for MY plate, which reads “Iā„HEAD”. Over 25 years, no official action taken…
Crank Tango: Not commenting on the deliberative nature on the wording, sadly the “Kicking the can down the ____” metaphor is a favorite of our esteemed actor/governor/his speechwriters. Original reference was probably to Cali’s credit addiction.
Scruffy_The_Janitor: ‘Specially when you got a wife and family, amirite?
Does anyone really think Arnold is smart enough to have pulled this off deliberately; I’m leaning towards the ‘coincidence’ alibi.
Arnold’s spokesman, Bob Griese, went on to explain that he couldn’t follow up because “the Governor is out eating schnitzel with noodles.”
I approve of that message.
RoscoePColtraine: Specially the family.
7 kids going to stay at your house while I’m on the unemployment line?
Texan Bulldoggette: Yeah no way in hell is he smart enough to do it, but that doesn’t mean it’s a coincidence. Maybe some day it will come out how he wanted his writer to throw in a quote from one of his movies, and was advised that “fuck you, asshole” was a bit much.
Coincidence, my ass. It’s the same phenomenon that has made Babble Spass’ facebook updates all coherent and shit.
Scruffy_The_Janitor: I was thinking of the story that goes: why’d you get fired honey? Oh, they caught you looking at noody pics of men posing and flexing.
(Sorry I exposed you to that danger.)
RoscoePColtraine: I was thinking of just saying that I got caught looking at pictures of my governor and my boss is a godamn liberal.
Crank Tango: Arnold actually learned English from Daddy Warbucks.
According to some bloggers on HuffPo, the odds of this being coincidence are something like 1 in 10 billion or more…
proudgrampa: Yes. He did it on purpose. And it’s fucking great. This is the sanest thing he’s done as Governator.
Scruffy_The_Janitor: well scruffy, I’m not gonna tell you how to hold the mop, but maybe a janitor shouldn’t be surfing the tubes when there is prolly swine-flu puke puddling on the floor somewhere.
After very little forethought and consideration I take it to read: T (Tommy) I Fuck You.
The SF Chronicle refers to this as “the X-rated evidence”. Um, no, you prudes, X-rated is porn, “fuck you” is merely R-rated; or possibly even less, since you can still get PG-13 if there’s only one “fuck”.
This is the stuff political legends are made of! And, we vass were there, Charlie!
“dat which does not keel me makes me stronger…”
Seems to me not so much an insult as an offer to the ASSemblyman what’s got the gay in response to HIS initial request for a rim-job.
proudgrampa:
I think the deciding factor here is that
1: The author of the bill told him he could kiss his ass.
2: The author of the bill has teh gehz.
3: The bill is for San Francisco, so it’s no doubt crawling with teh gehz.
4: His wife is on some kind of BS “Empowering Women” tour so what the hell else does he have to do but dream this shit up? He’s probably sitting in his office giggling right now.
Does anyone seriously believe the Governator wrote this himself?
In real life, it’s so much more pathetic: Arnold goes to his secretary and says, “See, I vant you to come up vit a veto message but schpell out ze vurds in my veto message so zat zey say ‘fuck you.’ Doo it naaoow!”
And the secretary obliges, so that she can keep her shitty job.
This is awesome.
Uncle Joe: I have to agree.
Coincidense my ass!!!
It actualy reads “I fuck you”–an interesting response to “kiss myh gay ass”.
I don’t care who you are, that shit’s funny.
Sen. Tom Coburn:
Every year, I watch your brave fight.
Again, godless liberals challenge our morality.
Today, what is the great threat to Oklahoma?
Sodomites! Perverts! DEMOCRATS!
Heathens!
In the book of Revelation, the path is shown.
The Rapture is upon us while the
Anti-Christ claims the heat is Global Warming.
Nowhere is the Beast roaming as he is in Washington D.C.
Democracy, Capitalism and God’s own plan are under attack.
Doom must be averted.
If the Teabagging Patriots hold fast and show us the way we have hope.
End the reign of Satan, please, Doktor Tom.
Signed, a loyal Oklahoma Christian.
I once started an article where the first letter of each word to opening it spelled (FUCK YOU *NAME OF DECEASED PUBLISHER WITHHELD*).
It happens, and I’m damn proud to see it continue to happen.
… and I should proofread my Wonkette posts, but fuck it. Call my editor.
guerilla-nation: Seriously? That is clever on so many levels.
Governor nader_paul_kucinich_gravel deserves to be banhammered.
Johnny Zhivago: Also, “dat which does not fuck me, makes me hornier”.
Zorg: Has anyone checked to see if snopes.com is on the case yet?
Arnold, it takes a tough man to make a tender veto message. Keep fucking that chicken.
The Italian Futurist and Fascist movements were closely aligned in 1920’s & 30’s Italy, so that’s all the proof I need to say Schwarzenegger=Fascist. That and his well-documented frolics with Kurt Waldheim on the rolling, verdant, jew-free fields of the Austrian Tyrol.
nbawriter: Was that publisher a flightless water fowl? Because if it was, someone stole your thunder and is busily exploiting cute animals as we speak. http://www.fupenguin.com/
the problem child: keep fucking that penguin!
the problem child: Interesting, but no. This was a specific sub-human on whom I wished death … and was granted that wish.
Hint: Newspaper biz.
If Annie Leibovitz could get a photo of Arnie in bed with Tom Ammiano, like she did way back when with Arnie and Lou Ferrigno, her financial troubles would be over.
And you all laughed at The Bible Code.
I never figured Rainier Wolfcastle as the subtle type.
guerilla-nation: Brilliant. I stand in awe.
It’s amazing what Maria can come up with as she texts her way down I-5.
We have such a clever Governor. Hey everybody, come to California and watch while we fellate ourselves into oblivion. Bring the kids.
This acrostic, she is weak. Check out this 32-line masterpiece (with classical references!) from 1939: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nicholas_Murray_Butler#Personal_life
Incidentally, I find this totally appropriate from someone who’s related to Joe Kennedy, Sr.